26 years old loser ..

[Boy Muhammad]

@Pain go and read 'Slight Edge' by Jeff Olson, all of the results you have today were compounded over time, the failure was never sudden.

Figure out where you want to go and start taking actions towards that, it is as simple as that, hope, luck, quantum leap are all bullshit, do the thing and you shall have the power.

 

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[MitchM]

Hi guys im 26 years old man from 3d World country i will tell my story and hope to get some help cause im start losing Hope and suicide is the only answer left ..
i was a good student my whole life .. but i was heavily traumatized by emotional neglect and toxic family .. i Suffred Sever depression and anxiety . That caused me to graduate years After my peers . From 2020 till 2022 i focused on healing myself and refused to get any job because of my entrepreneurial mindset . I decided to do some affiliate marketing and cpa marketing i made about 3000$ and lose them .. i was Never able to be disciplined in my work .. i end up with nothing .. i wake up today with no work experience, Great body shape , fellings of shame and guilt are killing me .. i see no Hope i feel Its over for me to fix my life .. Time is ticking and here i am . Living with parents that getting older everyday seeing their son dying slowly of guilt and shame .. i dreamed of helping them i dreamed of giving back to them .. i dont know how i end up here .. currently im doing coding bootcamp .. that eating all m'y Time .. i dont know what to do .. i sleep in tears and wake up in tears .. this is not what i planned for... I dreamed of earning online .. now end up a loser .. that not beign able to feed himself or even have a plan .. Time is ticking and i feel like im done ... i will commit sucside by 27 .. this year is my last try .. please give me some advice maybe it will save my life ... Im tired of beign a failure ..im losing Hope .. Friends .. Time and my mind ..

I'm your age and I have friends that are older and younger than you.

Most guys don't have their shit together at 26. Many people find success at different stages in their life.

Many 26 year olds have a ton of debt that holds them back for years. Many have drug addictions. Many are lost and have no idea what they want to do.

I have a friend who was a coke addict until 28. He then got clean, went to college again, dropped out for a sales job - and is still doing sales and is doing much better now.

The point is that you're comparing yourself to a single narrative that you've constructed when there are millions of examples of worse situations that turned out to be lives you would be proud of.

You have to take your current situation and turn it into a story that you can feel proud of. Being at a low point in life is always an opportunity for your story to go "and that's when I said enough is enough." Start being aware of your inner thoughts and focus on shifting them into something positive.

Also, many people find success but not happiness. Don't obsess over happiness. It is not a result or a goal. Your goal should probably just be to get really good at something.

If you make happiness your goal you will feel disappointment whenever you aren't experiencing it. It's a goal that can often defeat itself. Instead, get a journal and write down three things to be grateful for every morning. Then at the end of the day, write about 3 negative thoughts you had and how those things can actually be positive.

Doing that every day will make your mind start paying attention to those moments of negative thoughts and you will begin putting a positive spin on them in real time.

You've got a long life ahead of you. Relax, grow your skillset, fix your mindset, and realize that everyone is in the same boat as you at the end of the day. No matter how successful. We all lose family, friends, and eventually - we all die.

Just to add a personal note to this - when I was 20 I dropped out of college, and I was just as happy then as I am now. My mom was going into foreclosure on our house. My brother was a diabetic abusing drugs. I gave all of my money to make just two payments on our mortgage while I was trying to start my first business.

I now make what most would consider a lot of money and my happiness remains about the same. I've now got more responsibilities because of the money and the family that I want to build. A completely different life basically... but my happiness is about the same.

I don't know how to end this right now and I've got to go - so do the journaling thing I recommended for two months - every day. It will only take a couple of minutes. It will make a difference.

 

[Pain]

Your ancestors fought woolly mammoths, huddled in the cold, survived and then built civilization, and your parents found each other, got married, went to work and spent years of their life to support you, feed you, give you a place to live and sleep, just for your stupid ungrateful selfish a$$ to kill yourself.

I feel bad that all of them had no control over having worked so hard just to get a coward as their offspring.

I really hope they had more kids so you're not blowing it for all of them.

thanks for your words .. i will back strong .. i know it seems coward but living with cptsd , anxiety and depression is not easy .. any way i will use ur words as a motivation for me thanks

 

[Pain]

First of all, I want to say; welcome to this forum
I'm glad you joined and I hope you can stay here, post, read, give and obtain value.
The fact that you decided to register in this forum shows that you really want to improve things in your life.

I understand you a lot. I have been through approximately 2-3 hard depressions in my life.
One of them was really recently and I severely considered to commit suicide.
So I kind of understand what you are feeling... I know how hard it is to manage these dark emotions that feel like they take you and destroy you from inside.
I know how bad it feels to wake up everyday and don't feel the motivation or energy to do anything.
You feel like a constant failure. You deeply down want to change your life but depression doesn't let you and the cycle starts again.
I know how hard it is, please trust me.
I want to give some words to you, the same exact words that I wish I have understood when I was feeling this way.

1. Please highly consider breaking the cycle.
When depression hits, your mind and heart becomes weak.
Depression silently kills you.
Normally, people tend to search for a place to comfort. That is dangerous.
When you're depressed and you search for comfort and you get involved and embraced by it, depression is feed like a horrendous beast... it grows and takes more and more from you.
What you can do about it?
Stop embracing comfort.
By comfort I mean everything that makes you feel better in this moment but in the long run doesn't help you.
I remember always staying in bed, crying, killing my loneliness using the phone and mindlessly scrolling through social media.
You know what happened?
Surprise, nothing.
My life didn't changed at all.
What was the result?
My depression was being feed. I was giving my depression reasons to still exist.
If you have depression you're likely to be using your free time to scape hard emotions... through; videogames, social media, porn, daydreaming, listening to music and more.
You have to HIGHLY reduce these activities. They're overstimulating your brain and taking precious energy from you.
Instead, use all your resources to stay in silence.
From now I will star to share some resources that have helped me. Watch them in order and watch them completely. I wish these things have the same effect they had on me.
You don't have to watch it all in the same day, but consider to watch them:
I recommend you to watch a post I made about what I mentioned
I recommend you to investigate about Dopamine Detox (A for life Dopamine Detox)
A great video about this topic by one of my favorite self improvement Youtuber, Hamza

Now, directly about the topic about comfort. I think you should start to watch some videos of David Goggins.
He changed his life through pain
He was down bad in a terrible depression but he managed to become a successful man and scape his mediocrity.
He is inspiring and he shows you how you can grow through adversity. He teaches you and tells you how terrible pain can be useful to make change and become better:
Become A Savage & Live On Your Own Terms! | David Goggins
David Goggins on How He Became Unstoppable and Doing the Unthinkable
DO THIS To Make Yourself Immune To Pain & DESTROY LAZINESS
He also has a book that I REALLY recommend reading.
Can't Hurt Me by David Goggins.

2. Improve your mental health:
The biggest step you can take to improve your mental health is by getting away from social media and distractions. Don't expect it to do it overnight, everything is a process.
You should focus on improving your mental health.
There are several ways of doing it.
I recommend doing meditation.
And practicing gratitude.
I highly recommend the course of Yale University - The Science of Well Being (it's free!)
One of the courses with best reviews.
She explains how to REALLY be happy with science.
It involves being present (meditation), savoring life (being conscious and enjoying some moments) and by practicing gratitude.
Meditation. Try your best to do it everyday for at least 1 or 5 min to start with.
Meditation is not about not thinking. Is about trying to focus all your attention in your breath and focus on it - a simple and relaxing stimulus.
Gratitude Journaling is simply start making a habit of writing in a notebook 5 things you're grateful for. Now... if have depression, you will have a hard time writing something. I understand. But don't force yourself. It can be ANYTHING... from being grateful for the beautiful sky to your mom for cooking dinner.
(But every time you write it, you have to conscious about it and really feel grateful. Think about some smalls privileges you have... did you had food in your plate today? do you have internet connection? do you have clear water to drink?
Many people around the world don't have these things.
They're dying of hunger, coldness, heat, dehydration.
It's time to be grateful for the small and basic things so we can grateful for the big ones.)
How to start meditating
Hamza 10 Minute Meditation Breathing Exercise
Full Mental Health Guide For Men (This should be your priority right now)

3. Change Mindset:
Stop comparing yourself. Really.
Stop thinking about how much others have achieved. You will get obsessed with others.
You have to become obsessed with yourself and improving your life.
It's all you should think about now. Now your priority should be YOU.
Comparing yourself to others is the most stupid thing you can do (not trying to offend, but really...). They aren't exactly similar to you. They don't have the same dreams, problems, thoughts, circumstances.
Look at your past, not with hate but with pity.
And then think... how can I stop being that way?
How can I become different?
If you want to change your future, change your present.
But first of all, appreciate your present. Only in the present you can make big changes.
I recommend you these books:
The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle (how to appreciate your present as it's the only thing you can control and the only constant where you're alive. Past and future doesn't exist)

Atomic Habits by James Clear (how to change your life year by year by developing habits, how habits work and how habits are formed)

Mindset - The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck (how to change your mindset, if you have fixated mindset you will always think life is static and that you can't learn new things, grow mindset instead is what successful people have)

A video where Carol herself talks about it - TED Talk

If you can't afford any of these books. Write me privately.

Now. I don't want to overwhelm you.
What I wrote isn't supposed to change your life, I don't have that power. I wish I had it.
But I gave you some books that were useful for me and I hope they were useful for you.
Develop the habit of reading books with great value.
Surround yourself in a positive environment. Throw away everything that depress you (from the color of your room -I actually did this- to delete social media like Twitter).

You HAVE the control of your life through actions.
Ideas AREN'T important unless you give them shape in the real world, do that by taking ACTION.
You will feel lost, depressed and more...
You will fail many times. Never someone said this was going to be easy.
But you know what? It's worth it!
It's 10x times better to be trying that to be on bed without doing anything!

Don't commit suicide. I want to share this with you:
The Morning After I Killed Myself

That video saved my life and I hope it save yours too.
When I was considering suicide, for some work of the destiny that video appeared in my YouTube feed. I watched it and I cried. I cried because it made me realize about how much we're so closed in our minds... that we can't appreciate life.
Your parents are going to miss you.
They will never be happy again with your loss... everyday of their lives is going to be miserable.
They will miss your voice, your shape, your smile... your heart beating.
To your parents you're the most precious gift in this world even if you don't realize it.
You're not a failure to them. I'm sure they love you and they believe in you.
Believe in yourself. Don't feel inferior for still not reaching 'success'.
Look at MJ DeMarco story, he also wanted to commit suicide and he refused.
He felt like a failure many times.
But he didn't stopped. You don't have to stop.
Please never stop.
Fight until the end, try everything that is at your reach.
Take things with consideration and give yourself time to get out of that depression.
If I could do it, you can too!
Start small, develop some good habits as exercise (it will make you feel better and your appearance will change for the better).
Make a list of what you hate in your current life and focus on searching ways to change that.
But please don't give up.

I really want to wish you the best.
There are so many things that I wish I could say to you... but this topic is very complex.
My messages will be open for you anytime if you want to talk.
From my most genuine empathy, I want to wish you success.
I wish this was at least in some small extent useful for you.

I wish you the best

thanks bro real life saver .. i will back stronger than everyone thinks

 

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[Pain]

thank u all for your support and nice words ... i lived all my life as weak man .. due to depression cptsd and anxiety .. now i decided to fight back and be a man ... it takes what it takes i will live like a Warrior .. i will back the next year with good news ..

 

[Pain]

Your ancestors fought woolly mammoths, huddled in the cold, survived and then built civilization, and your parents found each other, got married, went to work and spent years of their life to support you, feed you, give you a place to live and sleep, just for your stupid ungrateful selfish a$$ to kill yourself.

I feel bad that all of them had no control over having worked so hard just to get a coward as their offspring.

I really hope they had more kids so you're not blowing it for all of them.

your words make me realise that im such a pu**y and shocked me to the point that i feel no depression anymore . yeah i was f***ng selifsh a*$$ . but beliv me i will back with huge sucsess your words saved my life .

 

[Keeton]

Hi guys im 26 years old man from 3d World country i will tell my story and hope to get some help cause im start losing Hope and suicide is the only answer left ..
i was a good student my whole life .. but i was heavily traumatized by emotional neglect and toxic family .. i Suffred Sever depression and anxiety . That caused me to graduate years After my peers . From 2020 till 2022 i focused on healing myself and refused to get any job because of my entrepreneurial mindset . I decided to do some affiliate marketing and cpa marketing i made about 3000$ and lose them .. i was Never able to be disciplined in my work .. i end up with nothing .. i wake up today with no work experience, Great body shape , fellings of shame and guilt are killing me .. i see no Hope i feel Its over for me to fix my life .. Time is ticking and here i am . Living with parents that getting older everyday seeing their son dying slowly of guilt and shame .. i dreamed of helping them i dreamed of giving back to them .. i dont know how i end up here .. currently im doing coding bootcamp .. that eating all m'y Time .. i dont know what to do .. i sleep in tears and wake up in tears .. this is not what i planned for... I dreamed of earning online .. now end up a loser .. that not beign able to feed himself or even have a plan .. Time is ticking and i feel like im done ... i will commit sucside by 27 .. this year is my last try .. please give me some advice maybe it will save my life ... Im tired of beign a failure ..im losing Hope .. Friends .. Time and my mind ..

Quit playing the victim, and take responsibility for your life. Playing the victim will only make your life worse, because it makes you think you aren't in control, so you don't try to change anything. Last year at the age of 19 I was bed ridden for a whole year, and couldn't stand up without passing out because I was having heart failure, because of poor genetics. I wanted to commit suicide, but I realized that would make god very upset at me, and suicide is selfish. Your talents and abilities have the ability to change the world, and improve countless peoples lives, and help people. If you kill yourself, you'll be letting those people down.

Take responsibility for your situation, and figure out how to improve it one small bit at a time. for me, it started with completely changing my diet, and walking for a few minutes a day(which is all I could Handle) then I started walking for longer durations, and going up stairs. Fast forward a year, I'll be running a marathon in a couple of months, and the doctors are shocked to see how my heart has recovered, and is functioning mostly alright. If I didn't change my circumstance, I would've died of heart failure by 23. That motivated me to figure it out, and improve my situation any way possible. You need to find what motivates you, and use that as fuel to get out of your situation.

Business isn't easy, quit trying to act like it is, I've had several business failures, and am going through one right now. But you can't ever give up on this world, or on your dreams. Eventually you'll figure it out, and you'll be thankful that you didn't kill yourself. You don't get another shot at life, once you decide to kill yourself, you're DONE game over. Do you really want to be the guy remembered for being a coward, and giving up on life and killing yourself, or do you want to be remembered for pushing through the adversity, and becoming a better person because of it? Besides, you'll have a cooler story to tell, it won't be boring.

If there's days where you feel like you can't do it anymore, just tell yourself "one more day" that's what I did, and it got me out of wanting to kill myself. Don't ever give up in this life, its not worth it. Suicide is never the answer, and there's always options to improve your situation.

 

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[Johnny boy]

thanks for your words .. i will back strong .. i know it seems coward but living with cptsd , anxiety and depression is not easy .. any way i will use ur words as a motivation for me thanks

Oh no depression I hope your body fights off all the depression cells and makes depression antibodies so you can beat the depression virus and be cured of the depression sickness you have.

Weak af. Does not exist.

To qualify for the depression diagnosis you have to do the following things:

- get in good shape from a regular weight lifting routine
- sleep with cute girls
- travel somewhere beautiful
- accomplish a list of goals over the next two months.
- eat healthy food like steak and eggs and broccoli
- dress your best and clean your life up.
- make some F*ckin $$$$

Do all those things and come back and say “Johnnyboy I made a bunch of money and slept with some ASU cheerleaders and went to Fiji and bench press 315 and ran with the bulls in Spain and redid my wardrobe and I’m still depressed” and I’ll give you a hug and tell you I’m sorry to hear about your depression and hope it gets better.

 

[Pain]

Oh no depression I hope your body fights off all the depression cells and makes depression antibodies so you can beat the depression virus and be cured of the depression sickness you have.

Weak af. Does not exist.

To qualify for the depression diagnosis you have to do the following things:

- get in good shape from a regular weight lifting routine
- sleep with cute girls
- travel somewhere beautiful
- accomplish a list of goals over the next two months.
- eat healthy food like steak and eggs and broccoli
- dress your best and clean your life up.
- make some F*ckin $$$$

Do all those things and come back and say “Johnnyboy I made a bunch of money and slept with some ASU cheerleaders and went to Fiji and bench press 315 and ran with the bulls in Spain and redid my wardrobe and I’m still depressed” and I’ll give you a hug and tell you I’m sorry to hear about your depression and hope it gets better.

You cured me bro

Oh no depression I hope your body fights off all the depression cells and makes depression antibodies so you can beat the depression virus and be cured of the depression sickness you have.

Weak af. Does not exist.

To qualify for the depression diagnosis you have to do the following things:

- get in good shape from a regular weight lifting routine
- sleep with cute girls
- travel somewhere beautiful
- accomplish a list of goals over the next two months.
- eat healthy food like steak and eggs and broccoli
- dress your best and clean your life up.
- make some F*ckin $$$$

Do all those things and come back and say “Johnnyboy I made a bunch of money and slept with some ASU cheerleaders and went to Fiji and bench press 315 and ran with the bulls in Spain and redid my wardrobe and I’m still depressed” and I’ll give you a hug and tell you I’m sorry to hear about your depression and hope it gets better.

There is no depression .. depression are unmet needs .. your words kills the p**y inside me

 

[heavy_industry]

now i decided to fight back and be a man ... it takes what it takes i will live like a Warrior .. i will back the next year with good news ..

No, don't do that.

Success is not an event, it's a process.

You might feel better at the moment, which is great, but if you continue your old way of living you will fall back into the old patterns of thinking and back into hell.

Instead of disappearing for a whole year trying to brute force your way through your problems, stick around and read other people's success stories from the forum. You will gradually learn how to think in order to achieve your goals.

You could perhaps start a progress thread documenting your own goal-achieving journey.

Living a happy and successful life is a long term endeavor, which requires commitment, dedication and discipline. Process-oriented execution, not short term energy bursts.

 

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[Isaac Odongo]

i subscribed in paid coding bootcamp as my last hope to save my life and not ending in the streets

Thank you for your post. You have courage. You are in the right forum. The people on this forum, all of us believe in you. Believe in yourself. You've read MJ'S books. You belong to less than 1% on earth who have. Keep reading and learning. I recommend you read The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by S Covey and do it now. Take your time in it. And learn who you really are. Live a safe and responsible life and you'll live to see a better day. I am 26 years old as well and in a 3rd world country as well, riddled with corruption and cronyism. But what the F*ck is that to me. My parents are peasants and they are aging too. None my paternal relatives has a home worth mentioning. I have a graduate degree and I still live with my parents. And we are squatters. I know where I am is unpleasant but I cannot wake up in morning and make it better. It will take time. Not a long time but some time.

 

[nnogalaxy]

remember, you can seek for "help" as much as you want, lay down and cry all you want.
but you know what you need to do, you've always known.
Get after it. It's that simple.

 

[nnogalaxy]

Success is not an event, it's a process.

This is it right here.
As long as you're on the path, you're working hard, you're doing the good habits, you're improving, that's it. You've won.

 

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[Isaac Odongo]

No, don't do that.

Success is not an event, it's a process.

You might feel better at the moment, which is great, but if you continue your old way of living you will fall back into the old patterns of thinking and back into hell.

Instead of disappearing for a whole year trying to brute force your way through your problems, stick around and read other people's success stories from the forum. You will gradually learn how to think in order to achieve your goals.

You could perhaps start a progress thread documenting your own goal-achieving journey.

Living a happy and successful life is a long term endeavor, which requires commitment, dedication and discipline. Process-oriented execution, not short term energy bursts.

Sure. Don't isolate yourself. You'll miss a lot and actually fall back too far. Just check in everyday on this forum and I quarantee you will have positive energy all the time. Also read Mindset by Carol S Dweck. It is a process. Sometimes you are just in a stage of learning and listening.

 

[heavy_industry]

This is it right here.
As long as you're on the path, you're working hard, you're doing the good habits, you're improving, that's it. You've won.

Sure. Don't isolate yourself. You'll miss a lot and actually fall back too far. Just check in everyday on this forum and I quarantee you will have positive energy all the time. Also read Mindset by Carol S Dweck. It is a process. Sometimes you are just in a stage of learning and listening.

Summary of what I've said above is this:

If the goal is to improve your life beyond comprehension in a year, the first milestone is not the next year.

The first milestone is to improve your life by 5% this week.
And you keep doing this every week from now on.

Nothing in this world beats incremental improvement. That's how champions are made.

Persistence instead of intensity.
Endurance instead of strength.
Process instead of event.

 

[Isaac Odongo]

First of all, I want to say; welcome to this forum
I'm glad you joined and I hope you can stay here, post, read, give and obtain value.
The fact that you decided to register in this forum shows that you really want to improve things in your life.

I understand you a lot. I have been through approximately 2-3 hard depressions in my life.
One of them was really recently and I severely considered to commit suicide.
So I kind of understand what you are feeling... I know how hard it is to manage these dark emotions that feel like they take you and destroy you from inside.
I know how bad it feels to wake up everyday and don't feel the motivation or energy to do anything.
You feel like a constant failure. You deeply down want to change your life but depression doesn't let you and the cycle starts again.
I know how hard it is, please trust me.
I want to give some words to you, the same exact words that I wish I have understood when I was feeling this way.

1. Please highly consider breaking the cycle.
When depression hits, your mind and heart becomes weak.
Depression silently kills you.
Normally, people tend to search for a place to comfort. That is dangerous.
When you're depressed and you search for comfort and you get involved and embraced by it, depression is feed like a horrendous beast... it grows and takes more and more from you.
What you can do about it?
Stop embracing comfort.
By comfort I mean everything that makes you feel better in this moment but in the long run doesn't help you.
I remember always staying in bed, crying, killing my loneliness using the phone and mindlessly scrolling through social media.
You know what happened?
Surprise, nothing.
My life didn't changed at all.
What was the result?
My depression was being feed. I was giving my depression reasons to still exist.
If you have depression you're likely to be using your free time to scape hard emotions... through; videogames, social media, porn, daydreaming, listening to music and more.
You have to HIGHLY reduce these activities. They're overstimulating your brain and taking precious energy from you.
Instead, use all your resources to stay in silence.
From now I will star to share some resources that have helped me. Watch them in order and watch them completely. I wish these things have the same effect they had on me.
You don't have to watch it all in the same day, but consider to watch them:
I recommend you to watch a post I made about what I mentioned
I recommend you to investigate about Dopamine Detox (A for life Dopamine Detox)
A great video about this topic by one of my favorite self improvement Youtuber, Hamza

Now, directly about the topic about comfort. I think you should start to watch some videos of David Goggins.
He changed his life through pain
He was down bad in a terrible depression but he managed to become a successful man and scape his mediocrity.
He is inspiring and he shows you how you can grow through adversity. He teaches you and tells you how terrible pain can be useful to make change and become better:
Become A Savage & Live On Your Own Terms! | David Goggins
David Goggins on How He Became Unstoppable and Doing the Unthinkable
DO THIS To Make Yourself Immune To Pain & DESTROY LAZINESS
He also has a book that I REALLY recommend reading.
Can't Hurt Me by David Goggins.

2. Improve your mental health:
The biggest step you can take to improve your mental health is by getting away from social media and distractions. Don't expect it to do it overnight, everything is a process.
You should focus on improving your mental health.
There are several ways of doing it.
I recommend doing meditation.
And practicing gratitude.
I highly recommend the course of Yale University - The Science of Well Being (it's free!)
One of the courses with best reviews.
She explains how to REALLY be happy with science.
It involves being present (meditation), savoring life (being conscious and enjoying some moments) and by practicing gratitude.
Meditation. Try your best to do it everyday for at least 1 or 5 min to start with.
Meditation is not about not thinking. Is about trying to focus all your attention in your breath and focus on it - a simple and relaxing stimulus.
Gratitude Journaling is simply start making a habit of writing in a notebook 5 things you're grateful for. Now... if have depression, you will have a hard time writing something. I understand. But don't force yourself. It can be ANYTHING... from being grateful for the beautiful sky to your mom for cooking dinner.
(But every time you write it, you have to conscious about it and really feel grateful. Think about some smalls privileges you have... did you had food in your plate today? do you have internet connection? do you have clear water to drink?
Many people around the world don't have these things.
They're dying of hunger, coldness, heat, dehydration.
It's time to be grateful for the small and basic things so we can grateful for the big ones.)
How to start meditating
Hamza 10 Minute Meditation Breathing Exercise
Full Mental Health Guide For Men (This should be your priority right now)

3. Change Mindset:
Stop comparing yourself. Really.
Stop thinking about how much others have achieved. You will get obsessed with others.
You have to become obsessed with yourself and improving your life.
It's all you should think about now. Now your priority should be YOU.
Comparing yourself to others is the most stupid thing you can do (not trying to offend, but really...). They aren't exactly similar to you. They don't have the same dreams, problems, thoughts, circumstances.
Look at your past, not with hate but with pity.
And then think... how can I stop being that way?
How can I become different?
If you want to change your future, change your present.
But first of all, appreciate your present. Only in the present you can make big changes.
I recommend you these books:
The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle (how to appreciate your present as it's the only thing you can control and the only constant where you're alive. Past and future doesn't exist)

Atomic Habits by James Clear (how to change your life year by year by developing habits, how habits work and how habits are formed)

Mindset - The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck (how to change your mindset, if you have fixated mindset you will always think life is static and that you can't learn new things, grow mindset instead is what successful people have)

A video where Carol herself talks about it - TED Talk

If you can't afford any of these books. Write me privately.

Now. I don't want to overwhelm you.
What I wrote isn't supposed to change your life, I don't have that power. I wish I had it.
But I gave you some books that were useful for me and I hope they were useful for you.
Develop the habit of reading books with great value.
Surround yourself in a positive environment. Throw away everything that depress you (from the color of your room -I actually did this- to delete social media like Twitter).

You HAVE the control of your life through actions.
Ideas AREN'T important unless you give them shape in the real world, do that by taking ACTION.
You will feel lost, depressed and more...
You will fail many times. Never someone said this was going to be easy.
But you know what? It's worth it!
It's 10x times better to be trying that to be on bed without doing anything!

Don't commit suicide. I want to share this with you:
The Morning After I Killed Myself

That video saved my life and I hope it save yours too.
When I was considering suicide, for some work of the destiny that video appeared in my YouTube feed. I watched it and I cried. I cried because it made me realize about how much we're so closed in our minds... that we can't appreciate life.
Your parents are going to miss you.
They will never be happy again with your loss... everyday of their lives is going to be miserable.
They will miss your voice, your shape, your smile... your heart beating.
To your parents you're the most precious gift in this world even if you don't realize it.
You're not a failure to them. I'm sure they love you and they believe in you.
Believe in yourself. Don't feel inferior for still not reaching 'success'.
Look at MJ DeMarco story, he also wanted to commit suicide and he refused.
He felt like a failure many times.
But he didn't stopped. You don't have to stop.
Please never stop.
Fight until the end, try everything that is at your reach.
Take things with consideration and give yourself time to get out of that depression.
If I could do it, you can too!
Start small, develop some good habits as exercise (it will make you feel better and your appearance will change for the better).
Make a list of what you hate in your current life and focus on searching ways to change that.
But please don't give up.

I really want to wish you the best.
There are so many things that I wish I could say to you... but this topic is very complex.
My messages will be open for you anytime if you want to talk.
From my most genuine empathy, I want to wish you success.
I wish this was at least in some small extent useful for you.

I wish you the best

This is entirely true and practical. Just take the steps. In a while you won't recognize your current self.

 

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[Johnny boy]

You cured me bro

There is no depression .. depression are unmet needs .. your words kills the p**y inside me

It’s just incorrect thinking. Like a dude walking along who takes every step by crossing his legs, falling on his face. “Poor me, I’ve caught the ‘trip’”. And then you say “hey bro it’s in your head” and he says “okay I will try to work on my mentality I don’t know how to do it though” when it’s literally an instant decision. Focusing on taking life improving actions will by default “uncross” your head up and you’ll accidentally fix your mentality without realizing. You are in no shape to fix your mentality consciously right now because you have stacked many different incorrect thoughts on top of each other.

Either that, or this entire thread is you trolling which I’m thinking it is.

 

[AppMan]

Hi guys im 26 years old man from 3d World country i will tell my story and hope to get some help cause im start losing Hope and suicide is the only answer left ..
i was a good student my whole life .. but i was heavily traumatized by emotional neglect and toxic family .. i Suffred Sever depression and anxiety . That caused me to graduate years After my peers . From 2020 till 2022 i focused on healing myself and refused to get any job because of my entrepreneurial mindset . I decided to do some affiliate marketing and cpa marketing i made about 3000$ and lose them .. i was Never able to be disciplined in my work .. i end up with nothing .. i wake up today with no work experience, Great body shape , fellings of shame and guilt are killing me .. i see no Hope i feel Its over for me to fix my life .. Time is ticking and here i am . Living with parents that getting older everyday seeing their son dying slowly of guilt and shame .. i dreamed of helping them i dreamed of giving back to them .. i dont know how i end up here .. currently im doing coding bootcamp .. that eating all m'y Time .. i dont know what to do .. i sleep in tears and wake up in tears .. this is not what i planned for... I dreamed of earning online .. now end up a loser .. that not beign able to feed himself or even have a plan .. Time is ticking and i feel like im done ... i will commit sucside by 27 .. this year is my last try .. please give me some advice maybe it will save my life ... Im tired of beign a failure ..im losing Hope .. Friends .. Time and my mind ..

Things are not bleak like you say, at 26 you have still a lot of time you can start new profession , go to university, really a lot of choices, when I immigrated I was around your age and started almost from zero.

 

[Isaac Odongo]

It’s just incorrect thinking. Like a dude walking along who takes every step by crossing his legs, falling on his face. “Poor me, I’ve caught the ‘trip’”. And then you say “hey bro it’s in your head” and he says “okay I will try to work on my mentality I don’t know how to do it though” when it’s literally an instant decision. Focusing on taking life improving actions will by default “uncross” your head up and you’ll accidentally fix your mentality without realizing. You are in no shape to fix your mentality consciously right now because you have stacked many different incorrect thoughts on top of each other.

Either that, or this entire thread is you trolling which I’m thinking it is.

Take positive action. Be proactive. Fill your mind with beautiful things. By the way which city are you @Pain in? Go to some of the beautiful places in your city or town or village. Savor the beauty. Swim, gym, walk barefoot on the beach, join a group of people doing something great to themselves or to their community, read great books that have been recommended. Check the forum everyday in the morning and evening. Go to bed after a full day of such work. Take grateful action. Say thank you to people who do something great however small. Say it genuinely, with a smile from deep inside you. Listen to and look for the good around you. Read the Rat Race Escape and make your 1/5/10 Planasy.

Develop positive habits. These are habits you won't need to remember with time. You'll just find yourself doing them. Example, I have struggled with pornography for the past 3 years. My goal is to finish a week without viewing it. My ultimate goal is to break free for good before I marry. Another is to change my Internet habits. Spend more time on the forum than on twitter or any other social media site. Read another great book every week. Do some volunteer work. Learn to watch some great videos on YouTube. Etc. Positive action. Positive thoughts. Positive results.

 

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[msufan]

It’s just incorrect thinking. Like a dude walking along who takes every step by crossing his legs, falling on his face. “Poor me, I’ve caught the ‘trip’”.

This is gold.

And the "depression = unmet needs" line is gold too. Your body is trying to help you to see the need for change!

 

[nnogalaxy]

A year ago I was doing extremely F*cking bad, like I was genuinely careless about what happened. I wasn't suicidal or whatever but I was probably in the darkest phase of my life.
Just being on this path of continous improvement and entrepreneurship (you dont even need money, just be on the right path for you) It'll F*cking fix you.

And the "depression = unmet needs" line is gold too. Your body is trying to help you to see the need for change!

Best line i've heard in weeks. You got it

 

[loop101]

Hi guys im 26 years old man from 3d World country i will tell my story and hope to get some help cause im start losing Hope and suicide is the only answer left ..
i was a good student my whole life .. but i was heavily traumatized by emotional neglect and toxic family .. i Suffred Sever depression and anxiety . That caused me to graduate years After my peers . From 2020 till 2022 i focused on healing myself and refused to get any job because of my entrepreneurial mindset . I decided to do some affiliate marketing and cpa marketing i made about 3000$ and lose them .. i was Never able to be disciplined in my work .. i end up with nothing .. i wake up today with no work experience, Great body shape , fellings of shame and guilt are killing me .. i see no Hope i feel Its over for me to fix my life .. Time is ticking and here i am . Living with parents that getting older everyday seeing their son dying slowly of guilt and shame .. i dreamed of helping them i dreamed of giving back to them .. i dont know how i end up here .. currently im doing coding bootcamp .. that eating all m'y Time .. i dont know what to do .. i sleep in tears and wake up in tears .. this is not what i planned for... I dreamed of earning online .. now end up a loser .. that not beign able to feed himself or even have a plan .. Time is ticking and i feel like im done ... i will commit sucside by 27 .. this year is my last try .. please give me some advice maybe it will save my life ... Im tired of beign a failure ..im losing Hope .. Friends .. Time and my mind ..

I think you are a troll. On the slight chance you are not, look at what you did here. You tried to make the forum members responsible for your success, happiness, and even your life. Only one person can change your life, and that is you. You want to earn money? Don't bring people your problems, bring them your solutions.

 

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[Black_Dragon43]

It’s just incorrect thinking. Like a dude walking along who takes every step by crossing his legs, falling on his face. “Poor me, I’ve caught the ‘trip’”. And then you say “hey bro it’s in your head” and he says “okay I will try to work on my mentality I don’t know how to do it though” when it’s literally an instant decision. Focusing on taking life improving actions will by default “uncross” your head up and you’ll accidentally fix your mentality without realizing. You are in no shape to fix your mentality consciously right now because you have stacked many different incorrect thoughts on top of each other.

Ahhh, how I love behavior-first. Forget the thoughts/mindset, focus on doing the right behaviors that are aligned with your goal and the thoughts will change by themselves. Being stuck in the web of thoughts is precisely why people are… stuck, and not moving anywhere.

OP should read the thread: https://www.thefastlaneforum.com/co...out-changing-your-thoughts-or-mindset.106227/

“We become just by performing just actions, temperate by performing temperate actions, brave by performing brave action." -Aristotle

 

[heavy_industry]

Ahhh, how I love behavior-first. Forget the thoughts/mindset, focus on doing the right behaviors that are aligned with your goal and the thoughts will change by themselves. Being stuck in the web of thoughts is precisely why people are… stuck, and not moving anywhere.

I agree with you on that.
The best way to change your mind is with your body. Take action and the emotions will follow.

All your actions will be stored in your memory (database) and will build up your mindset (operating system). Building a winner's mindset through repeated action will further bias you towards taking even more positive action.

That's why some people win at everything they do (e.g. @Johnny boy ), while others are victims and losers in all circumstances. Different operating systems, different perceptions of the world, different actions, different results.

 

[Pain]

I agree with you on that.
The best way to change your mind is with your body. Take action and the emotions will follow.

All your actions will be stored in your memory (database) and will build up your mindset (operating system). Building a winner's mindset through repeated action will further bias you towards taking even more positive action.

That's why some people win at everything they do (e.g. @Johnny boy ), while others are victims and losers in all circumstances. Different operating systems, different perceptions of the world, different actions, different results.

I was cought on Reading and watching self improvement videos without taking action i dont know how to describe it but Its a real addiction it makes me lazy and event focused i was trapped in fixing my mindset loop .. to wake up to the brutal truth Its about action not Reading and consuming . I was smarter than all my peers ..the only diffrent they work hard i think hard .. the do it i plan for it

 

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[Pain]

I was cought on Reading and watching self improvement videos without taking action i dont know how to describe it but Its a real addiction it makes me lazy and event focused i was trapped in fixing my mindset loop .. to wake up to the brutal truth Its about action not Reading and consuming . I was smarter than all my peers ..the only diffrent they work hard i think hard .. the do it i plan for it

I see dump old Friends getting jobs , married ... And there is me over analysing day dreaming ,planning and hoping

 

[heavy_industry]

@Pain Alright my friend, no more thinking, no more "self-improvement".

Let's start making a quick plan, do the F*cking work, and win.

Start small, but start now. Let's get the ball rolling. There is no more need for depression. Life is wonderful.

 

[Pain]

@Pain Alright my friend, no more thinking, no more self-help.

Let's start making a quick plan, do the F*cking work, and win.

Start small, but start now. Let's get the ball rolling. There is no more need for depression. Life is wonderful.

Yeah bro .. i spend sometime in nature today .. and Yesterday i get back to my gym .. i work on fixing my sleep routine , learning to code .. and hit the gym 4 Times a week .. for income i will rely on affiliate marketing and cpa this what i know to do right now . Also i Can build WordPress websites for local clients . Making 50$ a day in my country is a dream for many .. so i will focus on reaching this number this year

 

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[Pain]

waiting for MJ advice

 

[loop101]

waiting for MJ advice

Maybe you could read one of his books while you're waiting.