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Your Tomorrow Depends on Your Choices Today

Runum

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I was talking to my advanced ageing dad the other day. He was marveling at the things I had taught his granddaughter. These are lessons I learned from reading and meeting people with advanced visions of life. People like RussH, SteveO , MJ , Kung Fu Steve, the Mariani's, Dave H, and so many others I fail to remember have helped me. I owe thanks to them all.

The most important., self empowering lesson I believe I taught my kid was that you have the ability to make choices in life. However, what you cannot choose is those choices you make now will absolutely impact your life later. Freedoms with responsibilities.

My dad tells me when he was a teen his father simply told him it was time to get a job. There was no counseling about future dreams and goals, no vision. I am not bashing him, my grandfather did the best that he knew how at the time. That was how his father spoke to him. Very simple, get a job, punch a clock, live a life, reproduce, perpetuate, exist.

My dad left when I was 12. I saw him occasionally during the teen years but there was not much wisdom imparted. He tells me now that he did not know anything about motivating and planning for the future. I agree, that was part of my parent’s problems in marriage, neither one of them seemed to have a plan. They were not on the same page.

I, myself, did not understand this concept until I was in my 40's.

My kid is grown now but she is actively and independently pursuing her dream, her vision. She clearly understands that today’s decisions and actions impact her future. She understands her future is clearly her responsibility. She is not perfect but has learned to adjust and keep pushing. I am very proud of her.

If anyone bothers to read this, this is what I hope you take from this story:

Your decisions and actions today will have an effect on your tomorrows. You are where you are today because of decisions you made yesterday. This is true for health, finances, education, geography. Even the little decisions have an effect. Even the cheats on your dreams have an effect. You will have to sacrifice, to be inconvenienced, to achieve those dreams and goals.

It is your life. It is your decision. Life does suck sometimes. Life is tough sometimes. Life plays rough sometimes. Life doesn’t always play fair. But you will never have the success you dream about without making the day to day effort to move in that direction. Your dreams will never happen for you without you.

It is tough to see a mid 80’s great grandfather just coming to these realizations. I can look back at so many missed opportunities, so much pain that was unnecessary. This is not bitterness or sadness coming from me. We all do the best we can do to live life.

This is reflecting on life and choices. This is passing on lessons and knowledge to others. So many newbies come here to MJ's Fastlane and start out with flash and fire and fade away. Newbies see the dream, the end goal, but they do not see the choices and sacrifices that need to be made. Life gets tough and they quit pursuing their vision.

Teach your kids well. Empower them. Show them that knowledge, planning, practice, and sacrifice are what it takes to get where they want. Let them play and make mistakes. Mistakes are valuable learning opportunities. Let them feel the results of the mistakes. They need to know the feeling of disappointment and the joy of success. Start early with your kids and they will have the tools to make their own success.

I wish you well on your journey.
 
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Runum

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Negative example:

People during the lockdowns on FB and ordering from Amazon while complaining about Zuckerburg and Bezos. Then I ask, "What have you done to further yourself in the past? What are you doing today to get where you want to be?" Crickets. That was me in my past.
 

MJ DeMarco

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Awesome post Greg, couldn't agree more, as if I written it myself. Upgrade to minimally notable.

Poison pens -- limiting, negative beliefs that are writing a story not of your liking. Change those pens, and you change the story.
 

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is your life. It is your decision. Life does suck sometimes. Life is tough sometimes. Life plays rough sometimes. Life doesn’t always play fair. But you will never have the success you dream about without making the day to day effort to move in that direction. Your dreams will never happen for you without you.
Great post!

I want to comment on the section above.

It is important to have tough portions of your life. This prepares you and gives you perspective.

Fairness is part of perspective. It is also "us" as human beings attempting to compare ourselves with others. It is difficult but, these should be dropped from our thoughts.

As a society we are spoiled. Most of us don't understand what tough is. Look at the parts of history where life, health, food, shelter... nothing was guaranteed. People died. People did not have comforts that we are afforded. Our modern day complaints should fall on deaf ears.

"Move in that direction". Powerful... but not simple to understand.

To move in the direction means to take action... and continue to take action. You can have everything you want by continuing to move in the direction that you "want".

Life can be so simple if that is what we choose. Especially if we figure out how to not take life so seriously.
 
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Raedrum

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Great enlightenment @Runum, as MJ said, choice of commitment is what make you closer and closer to your goal each days.

I've read a book from Taisen Deshimaru about Zazen (a specific form of meditation) and his breakout was that in lieu of seeking to reach a goal, you must consider the practice (applicable to choices and commitment) as the goal itself. The practice and commitment are the ideal, not the holy nirvana.

I'm currently in the process of stopping weed smoking (been a daily smoker since 10 years) I'm struggling, but I'm already feeling the good effects. Next I plan to stop tobacco, alcohol and even sugar.

It is a daily battle, and I must commit to the choice of not smoking instead of smoking, again and again until it become not a choice, but a habit :) It is a choice today that will make tomorrow better.
 

Runum

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Runum

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I guess I'm too old to know that /s. means sarcasm. But, I'll know next time!
I am with you, I had to google it myself. :)
 

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