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What's wrong with me? Why didn't I stick to my long term goals?

Anything related to matters of the mind

bibbysoka

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Brief introduction: I'm a college student about to graduate next week. I used to track my progress on here in a thread (you can find it on my profile) and had a lot of very bold, but realistic goals that I had planned out in august. Looking back, I'm thinking damn, I was so motivated and had such a good plan going. For some reason however though, during this semester I forgot all about my plan and feel like I messed up.

My question is, why does this happpen? How did I let my goals and dreams slip away from so easily and carelessly? I'm not super lazy or stupid, but it seems like I'm not alone in this.
 
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Ismail941

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Hand written (Old School way with yellow notepad & a pen, not Ipad New school way) goals are most likely to work out even better than oral/mouth goals.
 

Tourmaline

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We're very good at forgetting, plus shiny object syndrome. If you really want to stick to your long term goals, I find it helps to revisit them every single day at least once if not more without fail!
 

Benji90

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The good news for you is that only 4 months has passed, for some they've let life pass.

You've caught it early enough to do something about it, as the poster above says, write your goals down and put them somewhere you'll see daily.

In my opinion I think it takes a monumental effort to go against the grain, so you see your friends and family driving the slowlane, so that's the path you naturally coasted - you'll have to focus to break away from the herd.

Just make sure you dont let a year pass and have the same epiphany.
 
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MichaelCash

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It is good to have goals and track the progress, but sometimes it is Ok to take a break, so maybe you can come back to your goals with new energy. I have a list of my goals on my phone in Google "Keep Notes" app so I can take a look at this list at any moment, which is a kind of a reminder. It helps me not to forget about my goals and priorities
 

Nick M.

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It's perfectly normal to get off track every once and a while. It's great that you recognize that you did, now it's time to get back to making progress.

Taking action is not about doing a lot today. It's about making progress every day. Consistency is more important than quantity.

Don't worry about working for 8, 10, 12, or 14 hours today. If you do, you will stop making progress a month from now.

Here's the plan:
  1. What's the one most important thing you can do today (no matter how small)?
  2. Do it first thing in the morning.
  3. Repeat tomorrow.
Once you've done that one thing, you can be done for the day. You can always keep working, but you know that you've made progress already.

Don't worry about what needs to get done in a month. That's not important. You can set a goal for the end of the month, but then always find the one thing you need to do today to achieve that goal.

Build a habit of consistency. The initial excitement will eventually subside. You can't rely on motivation to achieve month-long goals. But you can rely on consistent habits.
 

Champion

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Yep, just as Benji says, 4 months is fine... you didnt F*ck up!

This is something which will happen to you more than once, it actually has happened to me in the last 2-3 weeks and I just caught myself today, which is also why I clicked this thread.

Writing down your goals and reading/revisiting them daily, atleast weekly will deffinetly help us keep on track.

Checkout the book "it works" by RHJ. quite a short but really good read on the topic :)
 
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Kid

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Don't worry man, your goals and dreams are still there. Read what @Nick M. wrote, few posts above.
 

Boychamp

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This is always something I struggle with. The most important part is you're self aware enough to realize you're struggling with it and falling off.

It's ironic that I saw this post today because I JUST started listening to the audiobook "Atomic Habits" after seeing it pop up on this forum multiple times. I recognized I had the problem of creating goals and being consistent for a short period of time and then falling off, and realized that I needed to create better habits and build consistency. So now I'll be listening to this book, creating a game-plan based on the principles taught, and applying it to create better habits will which create consistency and lead to the goals + results I want in the long run!
 

AceVentures

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Happens to most of us. I struggle with this quite often, as I have not yet solidified habits to keep me focused. However, once I do realize I've gone off track, the way I get productive again is by doing an evaluation of my time-spend.

Invariably, if I've gone astray from working towards my goals, it's because I've lost track of how I'm using my time and complacency has taken over. Whenever I start feeling lost and as if I'm not working towards my goals, I'll begin at once to diligently track my time for a few days. I simply write down what I start to do and at what time. The delta between the activities becomes how long I've spent on any given activity.

Sure enough, as soon as I start tracking my time, I not only become more self-conscious and thereby more productive, but if I've been slacking, I begin to feel guilt and pain thereafter. The pain moves me to action.

The executive, first and foremost, has a good accounting of his time.
 
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FierceRacoon

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Completely normal and will keep happening for the rest of your life. It is how quickly you get back on track that matters. Next time try to notice it in 3 months instead of 4. Five years from now you will be surprised, how focused you will have become. Practical tools include having daily or weekly or monthly meetings with a mentor / mastermind group / friend keeping you accountable.

Then there is also leverage. For example, for each day that you forget to rewrite your goals in a notebook donate $10 to charity. If there's a week when you don't do it once, donate $100 to charity. If there's a month, donate $1000, and so forth. You can play with the numbers. For some people including myself this is highly effective, others need different kinds of leverage. Volunteer work for missing personal commitments has worked for me as well. Those tools are effective because they convert abstract future outcomes into tangible and immediate pain. Planned to write 1000 words during the week and only wrote 990? Part with some cash. Decided to work on your business over a holiday but instead played computer games? Go, serve some food to the homeless so you can think over your priorities.

By the way, regarding "better habits", writing down your goals, let alone remembering them, is not a kind of habit you can create in 22 days or 40 days. Just because it's called by a five-letter word does not mean it is easy. Two years of losing it and recommitting is a more realistic period, in my experience.
 
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Not Most People

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Go order Atomic Habits by James Clear. It will open your eyes to many of the reasons why you're having trouble sticking to things and how to do them more effectively
 

inputchip

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What's your "why"? You don't want it bad enough if you simply forget about it. Your like the dog that would never get off the nail because it never hurt bad enough.

Burn the bridges, don't settle for mediocrity. Don't give yourself any other option.

Find accountability in other entrepreneurs on the forum.

Look at your inner circle, do you have anyone in it that is pushing you?

 

William Ainslie

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For me, it is consistently doing 4 Entrepreneur/business daily tasks - 45, 45, 45 min & one 10 minutes one. IN between working a normal day.

Finding the joy and more importantly the consistency>

It is still not a safe habit - still need to force me to do 4 things.
 
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