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What improved your life so much that you wish you did it sooner?

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MJ DeMarco

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Big one: I went vegan in my late 40s. Every chronic ailment that I dealt with in my 40s (and spent $1000s of dollars on trying to diagnose/fix) disappeared in my 50s. Even had a scar on my face for 48 years which suddenly disappeared. Nothing dramatically changed at 48, other than dropping my Paleo, heavy protein low-carb diet to mostly plant-based, raw food and/or unprocessed food. On top of that, going plant-based has given me a great respect for all forms of sentient life which I felt I always had, but didn't live through my actions. I'd never murder a chicken, or pay someone to directly do so, but I'd have no problem eating one (and hence, indirectly paying someone for the slaughter). Going plant-based resolved this "I love animals" incongruity, a big source of cognitive dissonance in my life.

Buy a Water-Pik flosser for your mouth and combine with daily brushing. It will save you longer cleanings and big dental expenses. Nothing worse than laying in a dental chair for 2 hours with a rubber dam strapped to your mouth.

Big one: I stopped my daily visits on social media, and it improved my life.

And I stopped watching any network news, or news put out by big-tech/big-media platforms.

I stopped paying attention to politics, whereas before, I paid attention in an effort to make my "vote" count. Voting is worthless as the morons far outweigh and outbreed any intelligent opposition. I'll never vote again for the rest of my life as the last election showed me everything I need to know about that clown show, legit or not. Voting shows I consent for one of the two political parties, which I do not. They're both corrupt organizations who maniupulate the masses for their own gain.

Big one: Stop worrying about what other people think, quite possibly the hardest thing to do for me outside of going plant-based. This is a big one for young people -- the less "F*cks" you give about what random strangers think (not customers) the more success and happiness you will have.

Big one: I stop participating in organized religion which, like politics, is mostly about control, money, and manipulation, and instead, I started focusing on spiritual growth and enlightenment. When I noticed most churches (including my large Christian Church) were more opulently appointed than my own home (imported stone, marble, granite, shimmering chandeliers) the light bulb went off. No, this doesn't mean I'm an atheist, it means I have more faith in the higher power than I do humans entrusted with bringing truth to bear about a higher-power.

Bottomline, I'm all-in on living my life right now, while not giving any fuel to "what may happen," "who said what," or "who might do what" a few months from now.


In a funny case of irony, I stopped going to Reddit and it improved my life. Although this thread posted above has some great gems worth a read.
 

Issi007

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What improved your life so much that you wish you did it sooner?

Saw this question on Reddit and thought it was a pretty thought-provoking question that may lead to some interesting answers.

It can be whatever in any aspect of your life, both big and small things.
My morning meditation,

Never knew back then that there could be a way to raise awareness to such an extent,

Now, 20min of meditation in the morning and get so much productive for the day.

Really wish i knew this sooner !
 

Aditya Gunjal

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What improved your life so much that you wish you did it sooner?

Saw this question on Reddit and thought it was a pretty thought-provoking question that may lead to some interesting answers.

It can be whatever in any aspect of your life, both big and small things.
I wish i knew this sooner(it still is soon but more sooner i guess.)
First of all if you want to accomplish something you should have a clear vision about it ( you are doing it or not doing it.), This is because when we have ambiguity about something ,we dont put much effort in it and simply get a casual attitude. Hence make poor choices and accomplish something average/mediocre.
Then after having a clear vision we should put maximum efforts in it. Anyone with constant efforts and right decision can accomplish something great.
In short words, if you jump in water, learn to swim/die trying, or simply just dont jump.
 

RobinVL

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Cool question.

I can name a lot of things but I think the winner for me it was breaking up my relationship a few years ago.

I thought it was holding me back at the time and in in hindsight I was 100% right. Really came a long way since then, in personal growth mainly.

What would your own answer be to this question?
 

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  1. Accepting who I am and letting go of people who are not okay with my weirdness uniqueness.
  2. Learning to say No, specially to time thieves.
  3. Stopping listening to the naysayers who wanted me to live to their standards instead of unlocking my potential.
  4. Reading TMF - It has caused a lot discomfort, but it confirmed that something didn't feel quite right. I used to love my profession and being paid for doing what I loved, but being an employee sucked big time, which bosses and coworkers kindly reminded me regularly.
  5. Stopping spending so much time learning about programming once I reached a certain point, it was a time sink for marginal benefit. Building products instead got more rewarding.
  6. Resuming spending more time on music, which I've been neglecting for years.
  7. Understanding that meaningful work that offers the right challenge and makes you grow is important for happiness.
  8. Understanding that I should be happy before you reach your goals, as the journey itself is the goal.
  9. Finding alignment between work, lifestyle, and goals - This drove me nuts for years, but I think I finally got the right direction.
  10. Travelling abroad - It took me almost 28 years to get out of my home country. I missed out so much, but I've been catching up in the following years.
 
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fastlane_dad

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All right I'll chime in!!

I always find these questions fascinating - AND I've had many discussions with friends regarding this.

I'm not sure if its my personality, mindset, attitude, personal philosophy or overall life beliefs --- that outside of a very 'hypothetical' I should of invested X in APPLE in 1982 .... there is never anything I wish I did earlier, differently or at a different time.

I am under the impression that I make decisions to the best of my ability , with the knowledge I have at all times. Sure, I get 'swayed' emotionally from time to time and might make a decision that I wouldn't have made if I continued to 'overthink' the problem - but in the end - I am NOT regretful at all of any of these actions or decisions either - again I made it to the best of my abilities at the time.

I have also been trying to be 'aware' and cognizant of learning to separate actions I can and cannot control. Getting into a car accident, it is easy to fall back on 'I should of taken a different route to work', or 'I should have not sped through that yellow light' thoughts - and I try to separate sometimes what I could have controlled or not in those situations. Maybe if I took a different route, I could of potentially been harmed MORE , or died instead! I do not 'wish' I would of done anything different in this case...because who knows what the outcome of that could have been.

So it's hard to visualize 'should of could ofs' - as I live a very unscripted life as is, and feel that I am in control of all of my decisions and actions (to the extent I can control them).

If I chose to go out and party and be hungover, and don't workout the following morning - I don't start wishing I didn't go out or had as many drinks. I know I made a conscious decision to put myself into that environment and take those actions. Maybe I learned that I didn't like the results of my going out and drinking --> then I iterate and work on not going as hard next time, or not going out with specific people! Sure - I have lessons (which is a huge part of life) - but never a 'I shouldn't have done that specific action' regret.

No one makes me 'act' against my will. Sometimes situations force you to do one thing or another - but these are all again with constructs I have created and setup for my life (i.e. can't go out or work on my fastlane business because I'm watching my newborn, etc).

So this is always a topic that I fail to understand completely or have a good answer for - again might be due to my inherent nature of 'being', conversations, and philosophy that I have developed over the years.

Of course my mind, mindset, philosophy and knowledge became more refined (and there's pros and cons to that as well!) over the last 20+ years, but I do not wish my 40 year old mentality, thoughts and actions on my 20 year old self (what fun would that be..?)!

At the end of the day I ask myself (in a meta way) - am I in a pretty good spot in life? If the answer is YES and keeps being YES - then all of my decisions, thoughts and rationalizations worked to my advantage, and I don't sweat the micro.

That all might be wrong, and maybe there is a better (for some purpose) - or different way of thinking, acting and living. This framework has been working for me for many many years.

Excited to follow thread and read any and all responses though!
 
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million$$$smile

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#1 Learning to be comfortable in my own skin.
It took me over 20 years to finally admit to myself that much of what I was trying to accomplish was propelled by a drive to prove to others that I was what they would regard as a 'success.' It was a profound realization when it finally hit me that those 'A' students were now working for me. The dichotomy of what drives us to succeed versus just accepting the sidewalk can be fueled by so many reasons. I finally recognized the fact that much of my success was due to not feeling internally accepted in my formative years all the way through high school. It literally fed my desire to build and grow.

#2 Running and exercising.
I have 'learned' to love running. (Well, more like jogging at my age) It has put me on a path of eating cleaner. I try to focus on whole foods, nuts, fresh fruits & vegetables peppered with oats and whey smoothies. Lost weight, gained a bit of muscle. Still fast intermittently, but not daily. Still smoke a cigar almost daily Will abstain from that if I get serious about distance running.

#3 Separating myself from a toxic relationship.
I now live by myself and am so much happier. I don't 'need' anyone to feel complete. Perhaps there might be a long term relationship in the future, but not looking for one.

#4 Having a deeper spiritual life.
I am more at peace. I often pray. I feel it helps my decision making and definitely has been a stress buster. No more stress medicines; or for that matter no other daily pills once prescribed.

Life is good.
 

MTF

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What improved your life so much that you wish you did it sooner?

Saw this question on Reddit and thought it was a pretty thought-provoking question that may lead to some interesting answers.

It can be whatever in any aspect of your life, both big and small things.
 
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Mathuin

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Waking up early & exercising before work

Cooking more.

I imagine these will be common responses.
 

MTF

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Hey no kidding but whats you name sir?

I'll tell you if you send me your social security number, your penis length and circumference and share with me your most embarrassing secret.

What's the interest? It's creepy to ask people online for personal data if they don't want to share it.
 

doster.zach

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What improved your life so much that you wish you did it sooner?

Saw this question on Reddit and thought it was a pretty thought-provoking question that may lead to some interesting answers.

It can be whatever in any aspect of your life, both big and small things.

Buying a house

- Eat a lot healthier because making food is easier not having roommates "soaking" their old dishes for a week
- Food you buy isn't eaten by a roommate
- Working at night is no longer distracting with music and such
- Now can buy things from Home Depot / Lowes and keep them instead of just throwing things away because no place to keep it or you move every year or so.

I agree with the idea that houses are not financial assets, but my mortgage is as low as a two bedroom apartment thats even smaller than the house, and now I'm at keeping a decent chunk of that "rent" money.
 
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fridge

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Getting tested/treated for sleep apnea due to a deviated septum from taking a hard knee to the nose in jiu jitsu, currently on a CPAP which helps tremendously. Before being treated I was so tired I was closing my eyes while driving, cranky as hell, and had 0 attention span. Have a septoplasty (deviated septum surgery) scheduled for later this year and couldn't be happier to get this fixed.
 

MTF

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Two that come to my mind now:
  • Going back to combat sports. I used to train krav maga a few years ago and stopped when my coach was no longer available. In January of this year I got into MMA and it's been great. If I have a shitty day I always feel better after a tough workout (even if I don't want to do it before). I wish I started this immediately after stopping krav maga. I would have been a beast by now.
  • Learning how to swim well, surf, and freedive earlier. I love being in the water and on a particularly good day it's as blissful as nothing else in my life.
There's also one more that I know in hindsight will be obvious. But I'm taking steps to rectify this as soon as possible...

Namely, living in a house in the countryside, close to a forest and nature in general, with a lot of land and privacy.

I now live in an apartment. While I have a forest right outside, I can't just walk outside in the morning and enjoy the nature first thing after getting out of bed. I can technically get dressed and go outside but it's not the same as having it just for yourself right out the doorstep. Being on the balcony is not the same as being on your own piece of land.

This, plus even if you have a nice apartment, you still have to deal with all the bullshit of sharing space with other people. I have loud neighbors, need to pay a lot in HOA fees, sometimes struggle to park my car, need to climb a lot of stairs (not bad for exercise but shitty if you're carrying anything large) and have very limited space. Then there's all the damn noise of the city and all the people around.
 

cjh382

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  1. 2-3x daily Meditation / Mindfulness Practice
  2. Stoicism, Zen & Buddhism Philosophies (NOT the religious aspects)
  3. "programming my brain" for 20-30 minutes at the start and end of everyday with content I control aka YouTube University of watching channels like VYBO, Motiversity, Absolte Motivation, Impact Theory, etc...
  4. Deleted FB/IG accounts several years ago, productivity went up 500% easily
  5. Applied for residency + live full-time overseas to reap tax benefits on US earned income
  6. Installed "Motivation" chrome extension, Current Age Counter. When I open a new browser tab it tells me my exact age and I watch the number increment higher = motivation not to waste time.
  7. Betting on myself. Corporate life = 3-4% raise a year. Controlling my own destiny = 2-3x my income every few years. Not to mention exponential growth in free time, health & happiness.
 
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MJ DeMarco

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Was the catalyst for this change one arrived at through morality alone or was there also a medical benefit that made the decision easier?

It was both. The morality one was simple.

The health side took a lot of research and investigation, especially into who funded what studies, what was their motive behind the opinion (like book sales, keeping your Keto empire growing!) etc. I don't pay attention to twenty-something anti-vegan propagandists on YouTube (or here) because they tend to think veganism is Beyond Burgers, Oreos, and french fries. Also, youth is terribly forgiving in terms of dietary imbalances or issues, but these issues tend to "win out" as one gets into their 40s, 50s, and beyond. When people say they stopped eating meat, it doesn't mean they started eating fruits, veggies, seeds, or legumes. Quite the contrary.

People generally feel seriously threatened by any type of vegan message, especially when someone claims it has helped them. You'd think 99% of the folks here would be happy I feel great and that I don't have to waste mental bandwidth on what to eat. Nope, because it involves something they view as a threat. Just look at the clown who responded above. I'm so glad he is so concerned about what I put in my mouth. Doesn't even deserve a response.

Another thing that I found important was that there are a lot of world-class athletes who have MILLIONS on the line and tend to use a WFPB diet (whole food plant based) to extend their career.

Side questions - How did it affect your energy levels? Was it difficult to maintain a balanced diet?

I never felt better. However, at first I became a junk food vegan so the results were negligible. That only lasted a few months.

When I switched to a whole food, plant-based diet, then things started to change favorably. My blood panel finally fixed itself after having been in the dumpster for 20 years. And yes, I have no problem with protein or B12, in fact, I don't even check my B12 levels any longer because they're always in range, if anything, they're on the higher end of the spectrum. So not only do I have my own personal, empirical evidence, but I have hard data based on decades of blood chemistry.

Another note: This year I had my vascular system checked for arterial hardening (heart disease, atherosclerosis) and I scored at a 100% for a man my age -- 100% of the men my age who take this test, score worse in terms of arterial hardening. In other words, 100% of men my age have clogged arteries far worse than any degree than I. Guess that meat and dairy is working out for them, lol.
 

MTF

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1. Starting my own company (I know boring)

2. discovering stoicism, man this is a beautiful philosophy of life with lots of wisdom.
@MTF , you are also into stoicism right?

Yeah, stumbled upon it when I was still a teenager as far as I remember (or early 20s). Been practicing and studying it more often recently again.

Having a website called "discomfort club" is a strong indicator of that. :playful:

@MTF I was thinking about how strange it is for us humans that pleasure and pain are two faces of the same coin. Pursue only pleasure and you will get pain. Pursue pain and hardship and you will get satisfaction and pleasure.

We are very strange creatures living in a very strange world.

I think as with all things in nature it's not that strange. It's just that we need the right balance. You can't live without comfort but you can't prosper without discomfort, either.

What is MTF's real name?I googled for discomfort club and got a site which has founder named martin.

It's Martin DeDiscomfortarco.
 

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@fastlane_dad

I've been watching this thread since the start. I cannot think of a single thing because like you said, it would change my trajectory. And I don't want that. There are plenty of things I still want to do and want to do them now, just nothing I want to go back and do sooner or change.

Example: I used to smoke. One could say "quit sooner" would have been better. Yet it was a social thing, where we drank, smoked and had a lot of fun as a group. I needed that period of life to define, experience and choose my future.

I could also have started my business sooner. But then, would we scale up as quickly as we did if I lacked the knowledge that came from a decade of grinding it out as employee?

Utopian as it may sound, I am grateful for experiences I've had - good and bad. They made me. My bad choices led to a crappy life and FTE that led to good choices and discipline.

It appears you and I are in the visible minority here, vast majority has something they wish they did sooner.
 
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MJ DeMarco

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Haha reminds me of the teenager a while back who introduced himself as 100% meat only and declaring that his diet was going to make help him become a millionaire and then got upset when people pushed back.

As I said above, youth is terribly forgiving to poor or imbalanced diets.

Remember all those guys/gals in college who could eat whatever they want and never get fat? That's youth.

By the time they hit their 40s, they're fat sloths. By 50, they're on six prescription medications. Me? I'm on none. Not even an acid reflux pill, which BTW, I had to guzzle down in my 40s as I lived my "low carb" paleo life.
 

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Getting a job at a larger company.
 

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1. Realizing that life isn't a string of good events and can never be. In short, don't be afraid to get hit and your confidence will skyrocket
2. Stopping taking shortcuts in place of hard a$$ F*cking work
3. Deciding to pursue entrepreneurship
4. confidence is essence is really the combination of the first fact (don't be afraid to get hit by life/people) and your self-efficacy created by you overcoming incredibly hard shit and failing and still moving forward.
 

MJ DeMarco

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Going Vegan: Made me realize how many food insensitivities I had. In the beginning, it was just for health reasons. Then I watched Dominion on Youtube. I will never go back. Helped me physically and spiritually (in a non-woo-woo way).

I can't bear to watch it. I think I'll be traumatized for life.

@MJ DeMarco I struggle to eat more plants in my diet, and I have been wanting to do more vegetarian or vegan days and cut out some meat and dairy. My wife and daughter are also extremely sensitive to eating red meat and their digestion will me messed up for days after eating red meat.

Do you have a good resource for meals and snacks?

That's my wife's department. On the meal side, Ill snap a photo of all her recipe and cookbooks tomorrow and post it here. As for snacks, there's too many options there to list. And a lot of that stuff is processed and might not help improve digestive issues. Hell, most potato chips are vegan.
 
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Buying a house

- Eat a lot healthier because making food is easier not having roommates "soaking" their old dishes for a week
- Food you buy isn't eaten by a roommate
- Working at night is no longer distracting with music and such
- Now can buy things from Home Depot / Lowes and keep them instead of just throwing things away because no place to keep it or you move every year or so.

I agree with the idea that houses are not financial assets, but my mortgage is as low as a two bedroom apartment thats even smaller than the house, and now I'm at keeping a decent chunk of that "rent" money.
100%, I don't think I could ever live with a roommate in an apartment again, what a nightmare. Thin walls, sharing a bathroom, constant disagreements/tension about living situation, dirty as hell dishes in the sink not cleaned for weeks, neighbors blasting music, literally no storage room. I'm buying a small 2br 1 ba house sometime early next year and excited to have my own room for storage/office area and not deal with a lot of the apartment problems.
 

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purple mattress. sleep is key.
adding the oura ring and reviewing the data to get better sleep has powered me to do lots of other important things.
lot of cool biohacking you can do to help your main 'machine' run better.
 

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Working 100% Remote and async: Even though I am currently working as a full-time employee this single change improved my physical and mental health immensely. Now, I can go for a walk, stretch, or hit the gym whenever I please. I cook my own healthy meals, take naps when I want and there is zero office politics BS.

Stoping being afraid to walk away: I have been in a lot of exhausting and toxic relationships. Always afraid to stop taking shit. Partly because of being afraid to be alone, partly repetition compulsion. Therapy helped a lot.

Therapy and Anti-Depressants: For too long I believed that seeking help translates to being weak. For too long did I listen to the gospel of..'You just need to work out, bro. Just increase your Omega-3, bro. You don't need meds.' At a certain level lifestyle changes just don't cut it.

Starting boxing: In the gym, I learned for the first time what it really, really means to push beyond what you think is possible. Having done strength training and other forms of martial art for most of my life, I could never push myself as far as in the boxing gym. It transfers to other parts of my life. It builds confidence and makes me believe more in myself. Being on the verge of passing out. Against the ropes. Combos raining in on you. As the trainer screams at you to move you try to hold on till the bell rings. It is marvelous.

Going Vegan: Made me realize how many food insensitivities I had. In the beginning, it was just for health reasons. Then I watched Dominion on Youtube. I will never go back. Helped me physically and spiritually (in a non-woo-woo way).
 

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What improved your life so much that you wish you did it sooner?

Saw this question on Reddit and thought it was a pretty thought-provoking question that may lead to some interesting answers.

It can be whatever in any aspect of your life, both big and small things.

1) Hot yoga
I used to think yoga wasn't "real exercise" but I wish I'd discovered hot yoga many years before I did. I've done it for 4 years now and highly recommend it! Flexibility, balance, strength, purging stress, better sleep, and a mental reset for your day. What more could you ask for?! I've seen all ages in my regular studio... teenagers all the way to 80-somethings.

2) Weightlifting
Women are sometimes afraid of weightlifting because it seems intimidating, we don't want to look bulky, and we're often the only woman (or one of very few women) in that part of the gym. But it does wonders for your body and energy, for everyone! Not to mention, it protects against bone loss and breakage later in life. An ex introduced me to it years ago and I'm so grateful.

3) Prioritizing sleep
Our culture seems to love productivity and bio hacks so for those of us who need more sleep than most it can feel shameful. But once I accepted what my body thrives on, and actually gave it that, the benefits quickly followed. I need my sleep or everything else falls apart!
 

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Hiring/being able to accept help where my own skills fell short. It's a fastlane to success to talk to someone who has the answers instead of trial and error to figure it out the hard way.

Secondly buying more Real Estate instead of flipping cars. Much easier with better returns and less work.
 

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Argentina
Agree with stoicism, reading The Shortenss of Life by Seneca:

on-the-shortness-of-life-summary.png


3 things out of the top of my head:

Training with gimnastic rings. You can set them up in the beach, and there is a billion exercises to do with them.

Going whole foods plant based, paying attention/reading food labels. Doing stuff to eliminate heavy metals / parasites. Drinking tea. Learning of medicinal plants. I'm much more healthy at my 30s than I ever was growing up until my mid 20s.

Obvs wish I knew about the fast lane and the crazy and creative ability to create products that people love and give you $ for. To create value with your mind's imagination.
 

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