I've been a self development freak for nearly 2 years now and I would like to share an insight on how I can make myself do hard things like: eating healthy, exercising, meditating, writing, etc. Hopefully it will come to be useful for some of you too.
First of all, these things might not be hard to do for everybody for instance, I came to love some of my older habits that I really wanted to integrate in my life, like writing or eating healthy. On the other side something like daily exercise, I still have to push myself because it hasn't become a solid habit yet.
Time and again I saw my friends who started building habits from a depleting resource, which is motivation. After many failed attempts at changing my bad habits I developed this sort of a mistrust towards motivation because I would have a lot of it at the start, but when the going would eventually go hard, it would just slowly fade away and I would go back to my old ways of doing things.
From my own experiences and from my friends failings, I've learned that motivation is just not a good driving force because it doesn't last. I read quite a few books on building stronger habits and I have seen variations of the way that I'm using ego to stick with my habits, but not exactly the same thing.
I don't know if this is going to work for everybody because I haven't really shared it with many people, but those people that heard my ideas were really interested in it.
No matter how hard we're trying to hide it, inside all of us have selfish needs, we mostly care about ourselves. We all know that this sort of a behaviour out in the world wouldn't lead you far. But this innate want to be selfish and do things solely for yourself can be a powerful driving force.
My whole idea is to use different fuel for sticking with your habits, which on my experience is way more reliable and long-term than motivation or other driving forces.
Basically, what I do when doing something that I don't want to be involved in the process of, but I know that would be beneficial for my future is. I use my innate need for uniqueness and the want to be better than other people. Before you make any conclusions don't worry this won't affect your character in any way or make you a self centered prick.
Let's say when I'm running and I get to that point where I want to stop, I have a self talk in my head that goes along the lines of "think about how many people would have given up by this point, keep pushing forward." I know this might sound very simple, but this little mind trick has helped me by so much.
For extra weight you can make this whole thing personal, think about your friends or someone that is close to you, that will give you even more energy to keep going forward. You can use this technique pretty much everywhere and it has helped me by so much in building strong and lasting habits.
Instead of sinking down to the level of the people who are not achieving much, use their lack of commitment to fuel your own journey towards excellence.
At first this whole technique seemed a little immoral because it drives you to be better than everybody else. Which would make it a little counterproductive for me because I always seek to level with people and not to look down on anybody even if I feel better than someone I'm interacting with. The best part of this is that this feeling is cultivated on the inside and doesn't have to leave the security of your own head. While looking at ego this way you sort of embrace it and unleash it's full potential.
Ego is one of the strongest motivating forces out there if used correctly. Many people see only the bad side of ego and fail to acknowledge the good side of ego, which drives you to achieve more than anyone ever thought you could.
First of all, these things might not be hard to do for everybody for instance, I came to love some of my older habits that I really wanted to integrate in my life, like writing or eating healthy. On the other side something like daily exercise, I still have to push myself because it hasn't become a solid habit yet.
Time and again I saw my friends who started building habits from a depleting resource, which is motivation. After many failed attempts at changing my bad habits I developed this sort of a mistrust towards motivation because I would have a lot of it at the start, but when the going would eventually go hard, it would just slowly fade away and I would go back to my old ways of doing things.
From my own experiences and from my friends failings, I've learned that motivation is just not a good driving force because it doesn't last. I read quite a few books on building stronger habits and I have seen variations of the way that I'm using ego to stick with my habits, but not exactly the same thing.
I don't know if this is going to work for everybody because I haven't really shared it with many people, but those people that heard my ideas were really interested in it.
No matter how hard we're trying to hide it, inside all of us have selfish needs, we mostly care about ourselves. We all know that this sort of a behaviour out in the world wouldn't lead you far. But this innate want to be selfish and do things solely for yourself can be a powerful driving force.
My whole idea is to use different fuel for sticking with your habits, which on my experience is way more reliable and long-term than motivation or other driving forces.
Basically, what I do when doing something that I don't want to be involved in the process of, but I know that would be beneficial for my future is. I use my innate need for uniqueness and the want to be better than other people. Before you make any conclusions don't worry this won't affect your character in any way or make you a self centered prick.
Let's say when I'm running and I get to that point where I want to stop, I have a self talk in my head that goes along the lines of "think about how many people would have given up by this point, keep pushing forward." I know this might sound very simple, but this little mind trick has helped me by so much.
For extra weight you can make this whole thing personal, think about your friends or someone that is close to you, that will give you even more energy to keep going forward. You can use this technique pretty much everywhere and it has helped me by so much in building strong and lasting habits.
Instead of sinking down to the level of the people who are not achieving much, use their lack of commitment to fuel your own journey towards excellence.
At first this whole technique seemed a little immoral because it drives you to be better than everybody else. Which would make it a little counterproductive for me because I always seek to level with people and not to look down on anybody even if I feel better than someone I'm interacting with. The best part of this is that this feeling is cultivated on the inside and doesn't have to leave the security of your own head. While looking at ego this way you sort of embrace it and unleash it's full potential.
Ego is one of the strongest motivating forces out there if used correctly. Many people see only the bad side of ego and fail to acknowledge the good side of ego, which drives you to achieve more than anyone ever thought you could.
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