The Entrepreneur Forum | Startups | Entrepreneurship | Starting a Business | Motivation | Success
  • Sell-Me Saturday is Now Live!

    Have something to sell? Like to post a video from your YouTube channel? Want to promote your design service? Recommend a company? SELL-ME SATURDAY is your opportunity to self-promote whatever you'd like within the realm of entrepreneurship on one central thread... and at no cost. Go There
    Note: Indiscriminate SEO backlinking to questionable material is not allowed.
  • Join 50,000+ entrepreneurs who are earning their freedom and living their dream.

    "Fastlane" is an entrepreneur discussion forum based on The C.E.N.T.S Framework outlined in the two best-selling books by MJ DeMarco (The Millionaire Fastlane and UNSCRIPTED®). From multimillionaires to digital nomads to side hustlers who are grinding a job, the Fastlane Forum features real entrepreneurs creating real businesses with one goal in mind: Freedom— both financial and temporal.

    Download (Unscripted) Download (Millionaire Fastlane) Register
    Registering for the forum removes this block.

NOTABLE! REAL resources on self image and self belief

Mainstream7

Beauty is Truth
Jan 1, 2015
340
363
196
29
The Wisdom of the Enneagram.
Understanding yourself is critical to grow. You will know your strengths, your weaknesses and leverage that knowledge for all aspects of life.
Some are meant to be inventors, tinkerers. Others are meant to act within social groups. And other others are meant to be leaders and high performers.
It shows why opinions differ so greatly, when everyone is just different in their own ways.
 

Don't like ads? Remove them while supporting the forum. Subscribe.

Mainstream7

Beauty is Truth
Jan 1, 2015
340
363
196
29

guy93777

Bronze Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Jun 5, 2019
141
158
129
Incredible. Been looking for a book on character and virtue! How did you find that book?

i first found it with other great books on personal power here :



this is old public domain books so you can grab what you want.



.
 

Smuggo

Bronze Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Apr 13, 2018
83
128
126
And how about you @Fox ?

As I see you've made a lot of progress and changes in your life so I guess you had to increase your self image and belives. Unless you had it "inside" you all the time. :)
 

AniM

Contributor
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Apr 11, 2018
35
69
116
27
DC
@Kung Fu Steve turned me onto Tony Robbins Hour Of Power audiotape. There's a 15 minute priming ritual and then it's an optional 45 minutes of exercise to complete the hour.

The priming consists of moving and breathing (in a specific pattern), gratitude and visualization, and then incantations (like affirmations but with emotional energy).

I still have issues like anyone else but this audio has become a near daily ritual for me and it has improved my mindset a lot. It really does 'prime' you for the day if you it in the morning. I noticed a big difference when I fell out of this habit for a while.

I basically integrated it into the my morning routine, which is a modified version of the Miracle Morning. The Miracle Morning acronym is SAVERS. Silence, Affirmations, Visualization, Exercise, Reading, and Scribing.

The priming audio covers Affirmations (incantations), Visualization, and Exercise. I try to do the full hour or more if I can, but sometimes the 15-20 minute walk is good enough when I'm cramped for time. Afterwards I meditate with the Headspace app, read for however long I can, and then journal.

I am a big believer in repetition. I have a Dan Kennedy audio where he talked about 'spaced repetition'. He talks about the power of audio and how it's perfect for repetition since you can listen while driving, walking, on a train, doing chores, etc. He mentions trying to get 7 repetitions in 30 days, or even 21 reps if you can. That will help you really learn something deeply, and audio makes it quite passive and easy to do. He also recommends Psycho-Cybernetics which I am reading right now.

Another marketer I admire, Ben Settle, has a similar philosophy where he makes it a point to go through something 10 times if he finds it highly valuable. When I find a book or course that really resonates with me, I add it to my 10x list.

A lot of Tony Robbins' stuff and stuff @Kung Fu Steve has taught me is based on NLP. It's not everyones cup of tea but it provides many techniques to help change your belief systems.

I've also bought Jordan Petersons Self Authoring Program but I actually haven't had time to do it yet. This thread reminded me.

Basically I believe there are proven ways to reprogram yourself, but almost all of them take time and repetition.

I will also mention I have experimented a fair amount with psychedelics over the past few years. Namely LSD. This was probably the only thing that had an 'instant' effect on me. Tripping LSD made me face a lot of my unhappiness and disappointment, and acted as a catalyst for change. But that's just my experience with it and it certainly didn't do that every time I tripped.
 

ChrisV

Platinum Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
May 10, 2015
2,320
4,158
1,022
Islands of Calleja
What are the best resources you have USED to make real change in your self-belief and self-image?

I am not referring to the "ya that makes sense" type of material, but something you read or listened to that real lasting impact. Literally changed your life and how you view yourself.

Self-image is such an important part of success that I would really like to see what others on here could recommend.

Also if you don't particularly recommend ANY resource but rather some form of action (or both) definitely chime in too.
This meditation changed my life: YoungOne Meditation - Home

He's an old Chinese guy so expect some some woo in terms of how he explains it, but the technique is totally legit.

Also, James Pennebakers methods were life-changing:


Also also Jordan Peterson's Self Authoring program:

 

ChrisV

Platinum Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
May 10, 2015
2,320
4,158
1,022
Islands of Calleja
Oh, and belief change? REBT (Rational emotive behavior therapy) and CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) but I honestly just suggest talking to a good therapist and they'll help you change whatever beliefs you want. I mean sure you can read a bunch of books on it, but a good therapist can change your entire belief system in a few sessions. Also EMDR for trauma (trauma has a big part in your belief system)

Personality assessments; MBTI and Gallups Strength Finder. I've done lots but these have been most helpful to me.
What is this voodoo and why have I never heard of it?!?!! Definitely checking this out!
 

Bryan James

Bronze Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Jul 1, 2018
172
288
172
Texas, USA
A long time ago I was struggling with drug addiction (I got addicted to coke as a 17-year-old, quit that after about a year, but then experimented with everything I can think of other than heroin and meth for a year or two thereafter) and have been 100% clean for over 10 straight years now after getting into the books of Dr. David R. Hawkins. His books aren't "quit drugs/alcohol today!" books either; They focus on psychology and the studies of consciousness. Completely transformed my life.
 

Teo_NK

New Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Jun 3, 2019
11
11
17
Bulgaria
if you can once a week, go offline ( leave your devices at home ), go somewhere quiet, far from people, find a peaceful place and just remember it is you against the world (including family and friends ) and if you can't count on yourself there is literally no one that you can count on. more often than not the influence of some people will make you miserable ( even if you convince yourself that their opinion doesn't matter).
 

splok

Gold Contributor
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Summit Attendee
Speedway Pass
Jul 20, 2012
639
1,064
388
What are the best resources you have USED to make real change in your self-belief and self-image?

I am not referring to the "ya that makes sense" type of material, but something you read or listened to that real lasting impact. Literally changed your life and how you view yourself.

Self-image is such an important part of success that I would really like to see what others on here could recommend.

Also if you don't particularly recommend ANY resource but rather some form of action (or both) definitely chime in too.
If you're trying to improve x, any one of a hundred books could be the "event" that throws the switch for you, or maybe it's just something you internalized after reading 100 books. (Of course, some process led you to that event, whether or not you were aware of it...) Either way, you're a different person than you were before. Surely some sources are better than others, but where you're at mentally has a far bigger impact on when your tipping points. So I don't think the specific source is as important as the fact that you go searching for something in a particular direction.

Having said that, here are a few things that have made a substantial, lasting difference in my life (for better or worse):

Taking the real MBTI (as opposed to any online knockoff that I've ever seen) - The takeaway was the realization that not only are people different, but they're different in ways that can grouped and analyzed. Probably even more important was the self-reflection that this enabled.

Howard Bloom's The Lucifer Principle - good/bad/true/false? Mother nature doesn't care. Effective is all that matters, and if that doesn't seem match your perception of a situation, either your perception or your definition of effective is wrong. (essentially a corollary to "Would you rather be right or rich?")

Similarly, books from either Taleb or Ariely (I sort of read all of them in a binge at some point). Our brains evolved to be effective at certain tasks. These tasks are not the tasks we think they are. It's hard to overstate the implications. They don't present it so sensationally, but it really describes a real-life matrix. A huge part of "the script" is literally baked into our biology.

Get good at something and teach it to people. Don't stop until you're certain that you've made a substantial difference in at least one person's life. Whatever else is going good or bad in your life, you've helped someone, and you can do it again.

Decide to pursue a huge, unrealistic goal with literally 100% of your resources, and put enough structure in place to keep you on track when you start to waiver. Not rational, but a nice "F*ck this" moment can help you abandon rational thought long enough to get the ball rolling. Just be sure the juice is worth the squeeze... (The pursuit was a process, but the decision and structure were an event.) Your takeaway will probably depend on your result. If you win, you'll probably believe you can do almost anything. (Note that this is NOT great if challenge is one of your key motivators, and double not great if the juice wasn't worth it.)

A couple of tangential but hugely important takeaways from the above:

Emotions can enable you to think and do things that you never would with a clear head. Realize that you can use this to your benefit (and also that you're more likely to do the opposite).

Structure is probably the most important thing in our lives. The results we get are tied to the structure we set up (or that we fail to set up) far more than most of us would like to admit.
 

Don't like ads? Remove them while supporting the forum. Subscribe.

Supa

Came for the $. Stayed for the Ice Cream.
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Speedway Pass
May 27, 2015
853
2,452
560
27
Germany
Psychocybernetics by Maxwell Maltz was already mentioned, but I have to put it here too, since it's pretty much a whole book on the topic of self-image, and damn, if it's not a great one. I read it a few years ago and still think of it pretty often.

Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy by David D. Burns, this is the book that opened my eyes to cognitive distortions (like black and white thinking or mind reading).

Also, Headspace for guided meditations is just awesome (the app).

If you are a non smoker, you will never understand this book.

Allen Carr's book, the easy way to stop smoking, is the GREATEST book in changing your self identity.

Every smoker that I gave the book to, quit immediately after reading the book without the use of fear tactics and anti smoking drugs with tons of side effects.

I'm not too sure how the book worked, it just does.
Yes! This! I read it after @Longinus recommended him and quit smoking.
 

ChrisV

Platinum Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
May 10, 2015
2,320
4,158
1,022
Islands of Calleja
This resource was incredible for doing belief work. It's the only resource I've found that really works 100%. Most beliefs work tends to be shallow, but this guy gets to the roots of the belief:


There are a huge number of business-related issues that have their roots in psychological issues:

Procrastination, Inner Critic, Self-confidence, Workaholism, Perfectionism. To see the full list, click here.

It's based of IFS therapy, which is a scientifically validated form of inner change, and Jay Earley is an accomplished psychotherapist and one of the leading names in IFS.

Doing this program seriously rooted out every issue I had. The problem with belief work is that beliefs often have their roots in something that happened a long time ago. So superficial techniques like trying to 'overwrite' them usually don't have lasting effects. IFS is totally different, it finds the beliefs at the roots and heals them.
 

ChrisV

Platinum Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
May 10, 2015
2,320
4,158
1,022
Islands of Calleja
1. Psychotherapy and coaching ← worked wonders for me
I've said this a bunch of times. I mean you can putz around with all these 'change limiting beliefs' programs but the reality is that psychotherapy is a much more effictive to go. Their methods have been tested over and over and have been backed by science. Some of the belief change programs are good, but it's really like going to a Naturopath rather than an actual Doctor. You may get lucky here and there with the Naturopath, but the truth is that a Psychotherapist has spent their entire careers studying this and can fix maladaptive belief systems in a fraction of the time it would take one of these Self-Help guys.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Fid

Brian Suh

Bronze Contributor
Speedway Pass
May 19, 2018
357
381
183
Mindsets can help and so can affirmations but nothing trumps action and experience. Once your brain finds out through experience that you can survive much less success, that will change your self image.
 

ChrisV

Platinum Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
May 10, 2015
2,320
4,158
1,022
Islands of Calleja
Oh yea, these guys are really good too:

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PxditxbHsWg


View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yNtKWhoK_sA


This is Gary Van Warmerdams site.. it really does work:


Also @MJ DeMarco - I'd like to suggest this thread for GOLD or at least Notable. This is a collection of real resources that work rather than a bunch of mental masturbation and theory. I can definitely vouch for most of the resources mentioned and this is really a jackpot for people who are looking for real change.
 

G. Wellthy

Contributor
FASTLANE INSIDER
Jul 21, 2018
69
62
58
I’ve had a tough time with mental resiliency and growing/changing. Meditation has absolutely helped.

Sam Harris Waking Up App is the first meditation app that actually worked for me.

I don’t think I would have historically had sufficient self-love to advise on this chain , but a remarkable thing happened to me recently.

I was playing on online game I play far too much when I said to myself, and wherever the voice came from I could tell it wasn’t that nagging tone / part of the brain I usually banter with. But I said to myself with conviction “love yourself enough to never play this game again”

And I haven’t.

Sometimes the breakthroughs come simply because you’re ready for them. And for no other reason.
 

ChrisV

Platinum Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
May 10, 2015
2,320
4,158
1,022
Islands of Calleja
So I wanted to come back to this thread because I have a new perspective. I've tried to change beliefs for yearsssss. And it's tough. I've never found a full blown solution that just lets you read and rewrite beliefs at will. And I've tried them all. But now I've found that solution. IFS.

26131

This is the best book I've found on it for lay audiences:


I'm not going to say much about the technique itself, but it works for belief work.

It's one of only 2 treatments listed at the NREPP as Evidence-based treatments. The other is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. An Evidence-based treatment means it's been scrutinized over and over and over and heavily vetted by science and subjected to the most rigorous scientific tests. It's proven effective in study after study.

This is what actual psychiatrists and therapists use to change beliefs. It's used for serious stuff, but you can easily use it for whatever beliefs you have. I'm not going to get into the theory of how it all works, but I'm repeatedly blown away about how profound this technique is. Learning it was one of the single most beneficial things I've done in my life. His website that walks you through the process is very good as well.
 

RadicalShift

New Contributor
Jul 26, 2019
10
10
14
@Fox Were you asking for yourself or just to get good ideas for other forum members?

There are a TON of great contributions from members in this thread, thank you.

That said, I would like to add something to the mix:)

As this has been a struggle of my own (regardless of past accomplishments), I made it a quest to get to the ROOT of the problem.

Awareness is great and there are many excellent books that might help lead you to that much needed epiphany (I’ve experienced it many times) but...

The problem is...it rarely sticks.

You might feel good (and confident) for a while, but then for some reason...you revert back to the limiting/negative beliefs.

Why?

Well, imo, these negative beliefs are directly tied to “specific” past events in your life, particularly in ones childhood.

And it is those specific events that shaped your belief system, positive or negative, at the subconscious level.

Therefore you can read all the self help books on planet earth and STILL continue to flounder in this area.

While the conscious mind will understand, it is the automatic programming of the subsoncious mind that truly runs the show.

What has made the biggest impact for me?

One word: Hypnotherapy!

This is a POWERFUL modality that heals from the inside out, so to speak.

And one of the best things about hypnotherapy is that it can work FAST!

What might take YEARS of work with traditional therapy might only take months or even WEEKS (yes WEEKS) with the right hypnotherapist!

Search up R.T.T. (Rapid Transformational Therepy) and then search someone out in your area.

Self hypnosis audios May work as well, but can take longer and might be less effective because as far as I’m concerned, there’s no such thing as a “one size fits all” solution when it comes to Hypnosis.

Hope this resonates with someone.

Good luck!
 

domi99

Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
May 13, 2014
27
27
31
42
So I wanted to come back to this thread because I have a new perspective. I've tried to change beliefs for yearsssss. And it's tough. I've never found a full blown solution that just lets you read and rewrite beliefs at will. And I've tried them all. But now I've found that solution. IFS.

View attachment 26131

This is the best book I've found on it for lay audiences:


I'm not going to say much about the technique itself, but it works for belief work.

It's one of only 2 treatments listed at the NREPP as Evidence-based treatments. The other is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. An Evidence-based treatment means it's been scrutinized over and over and over and heavily vetted by science and subjected to the most rigorous scientific tests. It's proven effective in study after study.

This is what actual psychiatrists and therapists use to change beliefs. It's used for serious stuff, but you can easily use it for whatever beliefs you have. I'm not going to get into the theory of how it all works, but I'm repeatedly blown away about how profound this technique is. Learning it was one of the single most beneficial things I've done in my life. His website that walks you through the process is very good as well.
Thanks @ChrisV for sharing this.

How did you learn the technique IFS? Was it through STJ? If so, which enrollment plan did you choose?

I‘m very interested in trying that program to change some core beliefs.

Thanks in advance, appreciate your answer. :)
 

Create an account or login to comment

You must be a member in order to leave a comment

Create account

Create an account on our community. It's easy!

Log in

Already have an account? Log in here.




Don't like ads? Remove them while supporting the forum. Subscribe to become an INSIDER.

Post New Topic

Please SEARCH before posting.
Please select the BEST category.

Post new topic

Fastlane Insiders

View the forum AD FREE.
Private, unindexed content
Detailed process/execution threads
Monthly conference calls with doers
Ideas needing execution, more!

Join Fastlane Insiders.

Top Bottom