Instilling the Fastlane in our children

[Danzaland]

With my oldest child starting kindergarten in the fall I find myself wondering how best to set him on the Fastlane. My father didn't know, so he couldn't teach me. But now that I'm here I feel I can offer more to my kids.

I'm sure the first one people will suggest is to live it yourself, and I'm working on it.

What say you?

 

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[Guest3722A]

You just gave me a good, dare I say, I D E A ...

 

[mrhahn]

I'm definitely going to bring up the fastlane principles to my son as he grows older and starts going to school. I want to expose him to the mindset early on, but in the end let him decide on the path he'd like to take.

 

[Danzaland]

I keep thinking back to Vaynerchuk recounting his childhood selling baseball cards at an early age.
We are trying to mold him into a decent human being and trying to expose him to all kinds of different influences. My father in-law calls it throwing seeds to see what takes.
I'm sure we could be considered helicopter parents... karate, dance, soccer... but all of it is with no pressure to continue past the current commitment/cycle/season. Yes my boy takes dance.
I plan on trying to show him how to build things, troubleshoot problems, get him in the garage with my father to do oil changes and such.

 

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[AJGlobal]

With my oldest child starting kindergarten in the fall I find myself wondering how best to set him on the Fastlane. My father didn't know, so he couldn't teach me. But now that I'm here I feel I can offer more to my kids.

I'm sure the first one people will suggest is to live it yourself, and I'm working on it.

What say you?

My daughter just turned 16 and I've always instilled in her that doing the actual work involved with becoming a self-employed entrepreneur is not easy. She was young when started my business so she doesn't remember the 12 to 16 hour days of working 2 jobs until I was making enough money to sustain us with just working for myself. She remember's some things but what she see's today is what MJ would call "the event" not the process. She just got her 1st real job last week and is getting the taste of what the real world is like out there. She wants to be a party planner so I asked her, do you want to work for someone else or have your own party planning business ? Her answer was actually surprising to me. She said she wants to start out working for someone else and then eventually start her own but she sees what it takes to be self-employed from watching me and she said she's not sure she is cut out for that. I told her that whatever she decides that she should always try to achieve whatever it is she really is striving for as its better to have tried and fail than to be to afraid to have tried at all. I also added that some of my greatest lessons that I had learned were from things that I had tried and failed at and that doing what you love doesn't always end up being something you can live off of. Sometimes you need to do something you may not like so that you can have the time and money to go off do what it is you really love.

 

[Rickson9]

Speaking for myself I believe that an individual is either born an entrepreneur or not. I don't believe that it can be taught.

There are different levels of entrepreneurial skill and one can always improve upon their given skill.

"The secret joy of being a parent, Caplan argues, comes from understanding the limited liability of parenting. Studies have found that child-rearing is, if you can believe it, a little overrated. In surveys of twins raised together and apart, behavioral scientists consistently found that nature overpowered nurture in almost all categories, from character and intelligence to happiness and health. Once you accept that bad parenting won't always keep your kids from being great (and good parenting might not make a difference!), it's easier to relax and enjoy the state of being a parent."
http://www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2011/05/parenting-is-overrated-why-the-secret-to-happier-parents-is-doing-less/238407/

For example, my personality would make me a terrible entrepreneur.

I believe that same holds true for investors and other talents.

Since how children are parented is oftentimes an emotional topic, it is important to keep the following in mind:

"In other words, when we think we're reasoning, we may instead be rationalizing. Or to use an analogy offered by University of Virginia psychologist Jonathan Haidt: We may think we're being scientists, but we're actually being lawyers. Our "reasoning" is a means to a predetermined end—winning our "case"—and is shot through with biases. They include "confirmation bias," in which we give greater heed to evidence and arguments that bolster our beliefs, and "disconfirmation bias," in which we expend disproportionate energy trying to debunk or refute views and arguments that we find uncongenial."
http://motherjones.com/politics/2011/03/denial-science-chris-mooney

If one believes that parenting matters greatly - that's just the way it will be.

If one believes that parenting doesn't matter much - that's just the way it will be.

Personally I think it's less important to make the child an entrepreneur and more important to spend time to discover the child's strengths and tailor one's parenting to maximize the potential that already exists within.

My opinion only. No disrespect intended.

Best regards.

 

[GlobalWealth]

I'm sure the first one people will suggest is to live it yourself, and I'm working on it.

I think this is your answer here. Ultimately kids will emulate their parents, good and bad.

If you live your life as an example, your kids will idolize you and want to follow suit.

There are lots of things you can do to instill good habits in them, but leading by example is the best things.

I have given my kids books that guide them in the right direction. I am a voracious reader and my kids have certainly followed suit. My 11 yr old son read the Harry Potter books in 1st grade while the rest of his class was working on Dr. Seuss.

I have taught my kids finance and money management skills as well as the power of compounding.

I have also thoroughly explained to them they way entrepreneurs employ leverage while w-2'rs trade time for money.

My kids also do not get an allowance. they must work for their money; wash a car, clean the garage, etc.

My 15yr old daughter now has a PT job, runs her own fashion blog and makes and sells earrings, necklaces, and other fashion items.

 

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[GlobalWealth]

Speaking for myself I believe that an individual is either born an entrepreneur or not. I don't believe that it can be taught.

I tend to agree here with rickson. Not everyone is cut out for it. But entrepreneur or not, you can instill a good work ethic in your kids.

Whether you are a freelancer, solo-entrepreneur, investor, corporate exec, or a teacher, it's all about adding value.

The freelancer and solo guys live and die by their own productivity. It is the ultimate expression of entrepreneurship IMO.

The investor relies on his intellect and judgment to create value for himself and his partners (if he manages money).

The corp exec must provide value to his employers and be better than the next person while delivering profitable results for his bosses and the company shareholders.

The teacher holds the future in their hands. They must educate our future generations.

But in order to excel, in any profession, you must add value. This is what you must teach your kids.

 

[mrhahn]

Speaking for myself I believe that an individual is either born an entrepreneur or not. I don't believe that it can be taught.

There are different levels of entrepreneurial skill and one can always improve upon their given skill.

I agree that people are born with certain personalities and traits. That's how they are and how they'll always react a certain way to a situation no matter how old they are. However, these are different from skills (such as entrepreneurship), which I believe can be taught. As I raise my son, I'm not going to try to change his personality, but expose him to as much as possible, see where his personality complements his skills the best, and ultimately allow him to make his own decisions.

I don't think this thread was necessarily a nature vs nurture argument. The term "parenting" has many definitions as well. It can range from just being there physically for your child, to pushing them in everything they do (e.g Tiger Mom).

I agree with your view, I just think you misinterpreted what some others may have said.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Speaking for myself I believe that an individual is either born an entrepreneur or not. I don't believe that it can be taught.

Perhaps, but this thread wasn't about instilling entrepreneurship in our children, but instilling the Fastlane mindset.

They are not the same.

While "entrepreneurship" is 1/2 of the equation, the other 1/2 is mindset: Good choices, work ethic, discipline (financial and personal), personal responsibility, observing the consumer/producer environment, providing value, etc. Such are things that our youth severely lack nowadays. Seems like "I exist, therefore I deserve" is the prevailing mindset for our younger generations.

 

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[GlobalWealth]

Seems like "I exist, therefore I deserve" is the prevailing mindset for our younger generations.

disgusting, but seemingly too true

 

[Double M]

exactly, simply teaching your kids facts and figures of investing and entrepreneurship is just not enough. the fact is you must provide your kids with the tools necessary to carry out process, and instill self-dicipline, self-control, and self-awareness. provide them with the tools (character traits) necessary to become fastlane millionaires and let your kids do with them what they please. otherwise, they will simply EXPECT events and waste valuable time in self-pity.

 

[Bozigian]

In my experience. Last year, I did not have the fastlane mindset. I didnt even think being rich young was possible. I was planning to go to college for 4 years and get a finance job and work my way up the ladder and hopefully retire young.

Then one day I saw a Lamborghini Gallardo on my hometown. I later found out the owner was young. I remember when I saw the Lamborghini, I told myself "I will buy this car somehow before I am 20".

Now. I can say I have the entrepenuer mindset. Which I didnt have before

 

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[Danzaland]

Perhaps, but this thread wasn't about instilling entrepreneurship in our children, but instilling the Fastlane mindset.

I started it with the thought of both. My father instilled independence in my brother and I, taking care of ourselves, of our dwellings and vehicles. Dad is a mechanic and I spent many Saturdays in the garage, home remodeling and maintaining 5 acres that included cutting trees, mowing and clearing brush. He always said he was preparing us to go out on our own. I hope to be able to instill some of that stuff in my kids. My father didn't know about the Fastlane, so he couldn't teach me directly about it. I do know about it and hopefully my kids will understand it and be able to wield the power of the Fastlane.

@AJ, I think your daughter's plan to work in the field to learn is a wise choice on many levels for that path. Maybe one day she will make her own way. I know all my slowlane experience has been helpful in one way or another.

and just a Thank you to all of you for the responses. Each has it's own tidbit of wisdom in it.

 

[Pinnacle]

In Robert Kiyosaki's newest book, Unfair Advantage, he proposes the idea of creating a new educational system for those who wish to become employers rather than employees. It would be like an academy for entrepreneurs. It challenges the mechanisms of our current educational system and would teach students how to produce value for society as a means of not only building self, but building fastlane-style freedom.

The most effective means of instilling the fastlane in children begins with what you as a parent do at home, but continues and grows with a system that produces fastlane thinkers and doers. In other words, we need a school that teaches the fastlane.

And we can't just talk about it. One or more of us on this forum needs to do it. When I get some more entreprenurial experience under my belt, that challenge is mine.

 

[Jacqui]

Hi I agree with you. Living it yourself clearly sets our kids on the right process. I too am working on it!

 

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[Kenved]

In my opinion, teaching our childrens could not be outsourced, it is our responsibility as parents. While it is very challenging since there is no certain ultimate ways to instilling fastlane mindset because every child is unique and have their own characteristics, the result is very rewarding, we as a parents, the moment our children become wealthy, is is very priceless

We need to be patience with them, we need to teach them about responsibilities, we need to teach them empathy, we need to support them when they need it yet sometimes we need them to do something on their own to let them grow, we need to nurture them with honesty, and many other needed aspects.

While we do the best for our children, they still have their freedom to choose their own path, since they are born in different eras which will result in different type of challenges too. We need to keep this in our mind because when we choose their path, they become dependent on us and chained while fast lane is all about freedom, it is the exact opposite

It is like to become an archer, we can aim, we can do our best to shoot, do our best to take care our bow and arrow, practicing from trial and error yet the result is unknown. It could be hit the spot perfectly, or dent a little because of wind. Once again, their future is their own choice, not ours

 

[Salchi]

Like all human interactions, we can't truly teach what we do not understand and or have embodied! The best that anyone can provide is being an example by being yourself, which isn't trying to be someone else. My opinion is that, in the USA, the majority rely heavily on the government for education.

 

[Pinnacle]

In my opinion, teaching our childrens could not be outsourced, it is our responsibility as parents. While it is very challenging since there is no certain ultimate ways to instilling fastlane mindset because every child is unique and have their own characteristics, the result is very rewarding, we as a parents, the moment our children become wealthy, is is very priceless

We need to be patience with them, we need to teach them about responsibilities, we need to teach them empathy, we need to support them when they need it yet sometimes we need them to do something on their own to let them grow, we need to nurture them with honesty, and many other needed aspects.

While we do the best for our children, they still have their freedom to choose their own path, since they are born in different eras which will result in different type of challenges too. We need to keep this in our mind because when we choose their path, they become dependent on us and chained while fast lane is all about freedom, it is the exact opposite

It is like to become an archer, we can aim, we can do our best to shoot, do our best to take care our bow and arrow, practicing from trial and error yet the result is unknown. It could be hit the spot perfectly, or dent a little because of wind. Once again, their future is their own choice, not ours

Hi there, Kenved. Are you speaking to the difference between regular schooling and homeschooling, or do you mean that instilling these values requires the active and predominant participation of the parents?

I am a huge advocate of individual liberties of children as much as I am those of adults. So, the validity of your point is tremendous. The fastlane is ultimately a choice. The school system I suggest would not be publicly funded and enforced by law (a lack of choice)...it would be entirely privately funded - if you don't want your kids to go there, then don't send them.

 

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[kurtyordy]

This reminded me of last Tuesday when I was installing sloar on my house. It was hotter than satan's butt crack during a zumba marathon. Being the only solar install in my neighborhood, and living on a street that people use to bypass the main drag through town and avoid the lights, many people were slowing down to check it out.

My 7 year old son comes up to me and say- Dad, look at all these people stopping to look and look how hot it is, we should be selling lemonade. Unfortunately, I was too busy to be on creeper alert to allow it, but it did make my heart proud that he was able to spot the oppotunity.

One thing we have done, not sure where I heard of it, could have been here for all I know, we do not do allowances, we let the kids look for stuff that needs done and then negotiate with us for the work that needs done. They do not get paid until they submit an itemized biill for their services.

My oldest, the other 7 year old, is taking to it like a duck to water. She always tries to lock up all the jobs for herself so she gets all the money.

After she does this for awhile, my next step will be to teach her to pay her siblings a lower rate than what she negotiated so she keeps the profit without doing the work.

 

[NoMoneyDown]

You just gave me a good, dare I say, I D E A ...

Not sure if this is what you had in mind ... but I've seen a couple of educational "camps" created and taught by individuals, which serve to install classic money-making/money-saving techniques to children. However, I think the youngest age is something like 2nd or 3rd grade level. I realize this is completely different from instilling the traits needed to surf the Fastlane, and that is where any IDEA could be exploited if put into action. As others have said the biggest chunk of the education would not be focused on the money aspect so much but in instilling the necessary and fine-tuned mental fortitude needed. Something I think that could definitely catch hold - especially with summer rounding the corner. Of course as MJ preaches, the action would not be into you teaching so much as it would be to create such an endeavor and then franchise it.

 

[AJGlobal]

I started it with the thought of both. My father instilled independence in my brother and I, taking care of ourselves, of our dwellings and vehicles. Dad is a mechanic and I spent many Saturdays in the garage, home remodeling and maintaining 5 acres that included cutting trees, mowing and clearing brush. He always said he was preparing us to go out on our own. I hope to be able to instill some of that stuff in my kids. My father didn't know about the Fastlane, so he couldn't teach me directly about it. I do know about it and hopefully my kids will understand it and be able to wield the power of the Fastlane.

@AJ, I think your daughter's plan to work in the field to learn is a wise choice on many levels for that path. Maybe one day she will make her own way. I know all my slowlane experience has been helpful in one way or another.

and just a Thank you to all of you for the responses. Each has it's own tidbit of wisdom in it.

and you hit the nail on the head. She needs to make her own way. I can't force her or tell her which way she should go. As with anything she's done in her life so far no matter what it is I always give her what she needs to make the choice herself, but I also lay out the consequences of what those choices can or may be, good or bad. I make sure she plays the tape all the way through. Most importantly I always let her know that whatever she decides I will always support her regardless if I disagree with the choice she makes. In the end she is the one making the decision, not me. I think that it priceless and extends far beyond just being an entrepreneur.

 

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[Kenved]

Hi there, Kenved. Are you speaking to the difference between regular schooling and homeschooling, or do you mean that instilling these values requires the active and predominant participation of the parents?

I am a huge advocate of individual liberties of children as much as I am those of adults. So, the validity of your point is tremendous. The fastlane is ultimately a choice. The school system I suggest would not be publicly funded and enforced by law (a lack of choice)...it would be entirely privately funded - if you don't want your kids to go there, then don't send them.

Hello Pinnacle . Well, i can't be sure about homeschooling and private schooling, how they operate since in Indonesia, especially in my city, it is uncommon. So, what i meant is the later one, instilling fastlane mindset really requires active participation of the parents.

Interesting point is, sometimes dealing or teaching family member requires much more persuasive manner than when we deal with someone else. Since i know just a little about homeschooling and private schooling, it could be an alternative for anyone interested becoming fast laner. Heck, i even still learning and applying on how to become fastlaner