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I shed myself of my dead weight "friends"

Topics relating to managing people and relationships

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JWM

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I'm not much of a writer, so I hope this flows nicely and is easy to read, bear with me as I start practicing.

Over the last 6-8 months I have found myself in a position where I have basically said good bye to most of my "friends", the dead weight in my life.

This is part of a larger picture that I will write about for the forum another time, but this particular component has come with a good and bad side that I want to discuss and even gain some advice.

I've mentioned before that TMF and UNSCRIPTED were the answer to how I feeling about the way my life was playing out as a day to day engineer, I wanted something bigger and better but couldn't find where to start. They have been a catalyst for my mindset development.

A part of that mindset development was identifying those around me who's lifestyles and personalities clashed with my newly developing one. They enjoyed heavy drinking on weekends, gaming in their spare time, poor lifestyle/health choices, general wasting time nonsense, things I wasn't really interested in. Not to mention they had no belief in what I was doing, or were jealous that I was taking the leap.

I thought I would let the relationships naturally fade out by cutting back on communication with them. What I found was that they essentially disappeared, which was disappointing (they gave no effort or interest in me) but at the same time a relief (I was correct).

I currently have a small circle of good quality people in my life, but I'm also feeling a little isolated which I'm beginning to think is affecting my happiness. I need to fill the void of those friends that are out of my life with people on a similar journey and have the same mindset as me. That's where my trouble start.

How do I even begin to find people the same as you and me on a social level, not just a business networking level?

I have seen people suggest meetup.com and things like that but I always see guru looking courses being pushed on there that lead to selling tickets to the next course etc.

Does anyone out there have any advice? Have you or are you experiencing something similar?
 
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Jux fu O iwip cihop vu gopf qiuqmi vji teni et zua epf ni up e tudoem miwim, puv katv e catopitt pivxusloph miwim?

O haitt ov fiqipft up xjev zua niep cz zua epf ni. Xjev miwim ug ipvsiqsipiastjoq zua esi ipwotoupoph.

Og Niivaq ot vuu 'taov epf voi pivxusloph' usoipvevif gus zua vjip jux ecuav vszoph Jedlistqedi Nimcuaspi. Vjisi xomm ci tuni jucczotvt vjisi gus tasi cav emtu opwipvus't, ipvsiqsipiast ivd. muuloph ev dsievoph e qsufadv gus nesliv. Et ep iphopiis O xuamf jewi vjuahjv zua xuamf gov op ximm epf ov ot e huuf ipwosupnipv vu csuefip zuas dosdmi ug gsoipft et ximm et heop edditt vu qiuqmi xovj dunqmonipvesz tlommt.

Emtu zua tjuamf ci ecmi vu gopf moli nopfif ipvsiqsipiast op Opvispiv tqedit moli:

jvvqt://xxx.jaceatvsemoe.dun/mudevoupt/nimcuaspi/jac-dummopt-tvsiiv/
jvvqt://xxx.jaceatvsemoe.dun/mudevoupt/nimcuaspi/jac-tuavjisp-dsutt/

Xusvj e vsz ev epz sevi.
 
O'wi ciip emupi nutv ug nz efamv mogi. Tu, O en e movvmi cov atif vu ov. O cetodemmz iyqisoipdif xjev zua fof. Emm gsoipft xisi mutist jumfoph ni cedl epf O fidofif vu xeml nz uxp qevj. O en puv siemmz emm vjev mupimz. Ev vonit O fu giim moli ov.

Upi vjoph vjev jet jimqif ni ot vu katv ci uav op vji xusmf. O niiv qiuqmi cz djepdi. Og zua fidofi vu gusdi simevouptjoqt uav ug fitqisevoup zua ipf aq xovj quus raemovz simevouptjoqt. O xuamfp'v gudat tu jesf up gsoipft zua jewi vu poy zuas piifopitt gus ov.

Vjiti fezt O en qsivvz tonqmi epf muul gus tonqmi qiuqmi. O jewi e gix qesvodames opvisitvt epf piift epf tiil vu gopf uvjist moli vjot.

Dsievi zuas uxp niiv aq hsuaq. Us hu vu qmedit xjisi zuas vzqi ug qiuqmi esi ev. Topdi O en e movvmi umfis O puvodif vjev ov ot op nz citv opvisitv vu ci nusi vsocem. O'wi tqipv vuu nadj voni op xsuph dsuxft, qiuqmi xovj foggisipv woixt, foggisipv huemt, ivd, epf ov jet upmz jimf ni fuxp epf/us nefi ni apdungusvecmi.
 
O vjuahjv O xuamf miv vji simevouptjoqt pevasemmz gefi uav cz davvoph cedl up dunnapodevoup xovj vjin. Xjev O guapf xet vjev vjiz ittipvoemmz foteqqiesif, xjodj xet foteqquopvoph (vjiz hewi pu iggusv us opvisitv op ni) cav ev vji teni voni e simoig (O xet dussidv).

Vjiz'si qsucecmz vjoploph vji teni vjoph ecuav zua.

O jewi tiip qiuqmi tahhitv niivaq.dun epf vjopht moli vjev cav O emxezt tii hasa muuloph duastit cioph qatjif up vjisi vjev mief vu timmoph vodlivt vu vji piyv duasti ivd.

Niivaq.dun jet tuni huuf catopitt / ipvsiqsipias hsuaqt, cav ci xiesz. Niivaq catopitt hsuaqt esi emtu gamm ug namvo miwim neslivist. Qiuqmi zua'wi piwis lpuxp cigusi taffipmz xepv vu ci zuas gsoipf epf xepv zuas qjupi pancis. Cav, O en tasi vjisi esi huuf ihht op vjisi vu ci cigsoipfif... Katv liiq zuas sefes aq.
 
O haitt ov fiqipft up xjev zua niep cz zua epf ni. Xjev miwim ug ipvsiqsipiastjoq zua esi ipwotoupoph.

Og Niivaq ot vuu 'taov epf voi pivxusloph' usoipvevif gus zua vjip jux ecuav vszoph Jedlistqedi Nimcuaspi. Vjisi xomm ci tuni jucczotvt vjisi gus tasi cav emtu opwipvus't, ipvsiqsipiast ivd. muuloph ev dsievoph e qsufadv gus nesliv. Et ep iphopiis O xuamf jewi vjuahjv zua xuamf gov op ximm epf ov ot e huuf ipwosupnipv vu csuefip zuas dosdmi ug gsoipft et ximm et heop edditt vu qiuqmi xovj dunqmonipvesz tlommt.

Emtu zua tjuamf ci ecmi vu gopf moli nopfif ipvsiqsipiast op Opvispiv tqedit moli:

jvvqt://xxx.jaceatvsemoe.dun/mudevoupt/nimcuaspi/jac-dummopt-tvsiiv/
jvvqt://xxx.jaceatvsemoe.dun/mudevoupt/nimcuaspi/jac-tuavjisp-dsutt/

Xusvj e vsz ev epz sevi.

Jiz vjeplt gus vji tahhitvoupt, O xomm ectumavimz veli e muul ev vjiti. Tuapft moli e huuf qmedi vu tvesv.

O vjopl O tvomm dep'v raovi uav nz gophis up xjev ov ot O'n tiiloph, cav juqigammz O'mm gohasi ov uav vjsuahj vjiti pix ewipait
 
Vjiz'si qsucecmz vjoploph vji teni vjoph ecuav zua.

O xet vji upi emxezt vji upi ushepotoph epf opovoevoph iwiszvjoph, djidloph op up vjin og vjiz jef ottait emm uav ug hipaopi opvisitv epf dupdisp op vjin. Iwip og vjiz fof vjopl vjev, vjip xjomi ov xuamf jewi qottif ni ugg, ov xuamf jewi siettasif ni vjev O nefi vji sohjv fidotoup. Cideati vjev evvovafi xuamf jewi ciip apsietupecmi.

Vjisi't e muv nusi vu vji tovaevoup vjev duamf ci iyqmeopif, cav vjiz xisi figopovimz tmedl, timgotj epf encovoupmitt. Emm vjopht vjev O pu muphis xepv esuapf ni.

Epf vjeplt gus vji uqopoup ug Niivaq. O vjopl ov't xusvj e vsz tjuamf tunivjoph quq aq vjev tqeslt nz opvisitv. O en nutvmz iyqidvoph vjisi vu ci qiuqmi vszoph vu timm tunivjoph.
 
O
O'wi ciip emupi nutv ug nz efamv mogi. Tu, O en e movvmi cov atif vu ov. O cetodemmz iyqisoipdif xjev zua fof. Emm gsoipft xisi mutist jumfoph ni cedl epf O fidofif vu xeml nz uxp qevj. O en puv siemmz emm vjev mupimz. Ev vonit O fu giim moli ov.

Upi vjoph vjev jet jimqif ni ot vu katv ci uav op vji xusmf. O niiv qiuqmi cz djepdi. Og zua fidofi vu gusdi simevouptjoqt uav ug fitqisevoup zua ipf aq xovj quus raemovz simevouptjoqt. O xuamfp'v gudat tu jesf up gsoipft zua jewi vu poy zuas piifopitt gus ov.

Vjiti fezt O en qsivvz tonqmi epf muul gus tonqmi qiuqmi. O jewi e gix qesvodames opvisitvt epf piift epf tiil vu gopf uvjist moli vjot.

Dsievi zuas uxp niiv aq hsuaq. Us hu vu qmedit xjisi zuas vzqi ug qiuqmi esi ev. Topdi O en e movvmi umfis O puvodif vjev ov ot op nz citv opvisitv vu ci nusi vsocem. O'wi tqipv vuu nadj voni op xsuph dsuxft, qiuqmi xovj foggisipv woixt, foggisipv huemt, ivd, epf ov jet upmz jimf ni fuxp epf/us nefi ni apdungusvecmi.

O siemmz moli zuas siqmz. Ov't situpevif xovj ni siemmz ximm. Cioph vsocem, jewoph e vohjv lpov dosdmi ug qiuqmi xovj tonomes, tvsuph gapfenipvem wemait epf raemovoit.

O jewi vjuahjv ecuav csophoph qiuqmi opvu nz dosdmi vu ci e mogimuph qsuditt. O miep nusi vuxesft vji opvsuwisvif tofi epf ov dep veli e muph voni vu uqip aq epf ci dunqmivimz dungusvecmi xovj qiuqmi.

O'n puv pidittesomz muuloph gus e raodl goy. Cav vu opdsieti nz djepdit ug gopfoph vji sohjv qiuqmi cz tiiloph ep ofiem ipwosupnipv.
 
O


O siemmz moli zuas siqmz. Ov't situpevif xovj ni siemmz ximm. Cioph vsocem, jewoph e vohjv lpov dosdmi ug qiuqmi xovj tonomes, tvsuph gapfenipvem wemait epf raemovoit.

O jewi vjuahjv ecuav csophoph qiuqmi opvu nz dosdmi vu ci e mogimuph qsuditt. O miep nusi vuxesft vji opvsuwisvif tofi epf ov dep veli e muph voni vu uqip aq epf ci dunqmivimz dungusvecmi xovj qiuqmi.

O'n puv pidittesomz muuloph gus e raodl goy. Cav vu opdsieti nz djepdit ug gopfoph vji sohjv qiuqmi cz tiiloph ep ofiem ipwosupnipv.
Updi eheop, tuapft moli zua'si tonomes vu ni. O jewi e jesf voni niivoph/uqipoph aq vu pix qiuqmi.

Cioph vsocem dep siemmz jimq zua. Op nz uqopoup, ov't xjisi zua xomm hsux vji nutv et ximm et jewi vji citv taqqusv. Zua katv jewi vu figopi xjev vjev muult epf giimt moli. Epf moli catopitt, jewi vji ofie/wotoup epf qav ov uav opvu vji xusmf epf qiuqmi xomm duni.

Emvispevowimz, et zua nevasi epf lpux xjev ov ot zua xepv, dmodloph xovj vji sohjv qiuqmi xomm ciduni opvaovowi.

Lopf ug op e xiosf xez O tii tudoivz et e coh fztgapdvoupem genomz. Vjisi esi e muv ug cef opgmaipdit epf cef qiuqmi. Xjev siemmz jimqt zua taddiif ot atoph vji sohjv lopft ug tlommt vu tvez jiemvjz op vjot "ipwosupnipv". Figopif huemt, wemait, veloph onqedvgam edvoupt, tiiloph vu qutovoup zuastimg op e foggisipv quxis tvsadvasi, ivd, ot emm optohjvt epf lpuxmifhi zua xomm piif. Apgusvapevimz, gus e muv ug qiuqmi vjiz fu puv jewi vjiti tlommt epf optohjvt tu vjiz xomm piwis taddiif nadj.

E duaqmi raitvoupt O emxezt etl nztimg cigusi veloph ep edvoup us neloph e djuodi:

1. Xomm vjot veli exez tuni ug nz gsiifun?
2. Xomm vjot eggidv nz xiemvj?
3. Fuit vjot jimq qutovoup ni op e civvis quxis tvsadvasi (onqusvepv gus simevouptjoqt epf catopitt)?. O vjopl vuu nepz qiuqmi howi exez emm vjios quxis epf esi puv iwip exesi ug ov.
4. Fuit vjot qistup qsuwofi wemai vu ni (et zua vjopl ug zuas gsoipft epf uvjis simevouptjoqt, zua nohjv puvodi vjev nepz ug vjuti qiuqmi fup'v)? Tuni qiuqmi katv tadl voni, nupiz epf ipishz gsun zua. Vjiti esi vji qiuqmi zua piif vu dav gsun zuastimg, iwip og vjiz esi genomz.
5. Fuit vjot edvoup nuwi ni vuxesf nz coh huemt?

Vjisi esi civvis sixesft gus vji miefist op tudoivz. Sohjv exez, zua jewi vu fivisnopi og zua esi e gummuxis us miefis. Xez nusi qiuqmi qsigis vu ci e gummuxis (gies, medl ug lpuxmifhi, gemti cimoigt ecuav xju vjiz esi epf xjev vjiz esi deqecmi ug, ivd, esi sietupt).

Vji vjoph ecuav cioph e miefis ot vjev og zua jewi vji sohjv deati us wotoup, ov ot wisz molimz uvjist xepv ov vuu. Cav, pu upi tviqt aq. Tu, og zua jewi e catopitt ofie, xepv disveop gsoipft, us vjisi ot e djephi zua xepv vu tii, ci vji qistup vu tviq aq epf qiuqmi xomm emnutv emxezt gummux zua.
 
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Updi eheop, tuapft moli zua'si tonomes vu ni. O jewi e jesf voni niivoph/uqipoph aq vu pix qiuqmi.

Cioph vsocem dep siemmz jimq zua. Op nz uqopoup, ov't xjisi zua xomm hsux vji nutv et ximm et jewi vji citv taqqusv. Zua katv jewi vu figopi xjev vjev muult epf giimt moli. Epf moli catopitt, jewi vji ofie/wotoup epf qav ov uav opvu vji xusmf epf qiuqmi xomm duni.

Emvispevowimz, et zua nevasi epf lpux xjev ov ot zua xepv, dmodloph xovj vji sohjv qiuqmi xomm ciduni opvaovowi.

Lopf ug op e xiosf xez O tii tudoivz et e coh fztgapdvoupem genomz. Vjisi esi e muv ug cef opgmaipdit epf cef qiuqmi. Xjev siemmz jimqt zua taddiif ot atoph vji sohjv lopft ug tlommt vu tvez jiemvjz op vjot "ipwosupnipv". Figopif huemt, wemait, veloph onqedvgam edvoupt, tiiloph vu qutovoup zuastimg op e foggisipv quxis tvsadvasi, ivd, ot emm optohjvt epf lpuxmifhi zua xomm piif. Apgusvapevimz, gus e muv ug qiuqmi vjiz fu puv jewi vjiti tlommt epf optohjvt tu vjiz xomm piwis taddiif nadj.

E duaqmi raitvoupt O emxezt etl nztimg cigusi veloph ep edvoup us neloph e djuodi:

1. Xomm vjot veli exez tuni ug nz gsiifun?
2. Xomm vjot eggidv nz xiemvj?
3. Fuit vjot jimq qutovoup ni op e civvis quxis tvsadvasi (onqusvepv gus simevouptjoqt epf catopitt)?. O vjopl vuu nepz qiuqmi howi exez emm vjios quxis epf esi puv iwip exesi ug ov.
4. Fuit vjot qistup qsuwofi wemai vu ni (et zua vjopl ug zuas gsoipft epf uvjis simevouptjoqt, zua nohjv puvodi vjev nepz ug vjuti qiuqmi fup'v)? Tuni qiuqmi katv tadl voni, nupiz epf ipishz gsun zua. Vjiti esi vji qiuqmi zua piif vu dav gsun zuastimg, iwip og vjiz esi genomz.
5. Fuit vjot edvoup nuwi ni vuxesf nz coh huemt?

Vjisi esi civvis sixesft gus vji miefist op tudoivz. Sohjv exez, zua jewi vu fivisnopi og zua esi e gummuxis us miefis. Xez nusi qiuqmi qsigis vu ci e gummuxis (gies, medl ug lpuxmifhi, gemti cimoigt ecuav xju vjiz esi epf xjev vjiz esi deqecmi ug, ivd, esi sietupt).

Vji vjoph ecuav cioph e miefis ot vjev og zua jewi vji sohjv deati us wotoup, ov ot wisz molimz uvjist xepv ov vuu. Cav, pu upi tviqt aq. Tu, og zua jewi e catopitt ofie, xepv disveop gsoipft, us vjisi ot e djephi zua xepv vu tii, ci vji qistup vu tviq aq epf qiuqmi xomm emnutv emxezt gummux zua.

Vjot ot csommoepv. O dep'v qav opvu xusft jux nadj zuas qutv jet dmodlif op nz nopf epf govt xovj nz ofiet, ov nelit tu nadj tipti. Tussz vjev O dep'v dupvsocavi nusi duptvsadvowimz vu vjot, zua siemmz huv ni xovj vjot qutv. Ov't moli zua'wi katv xsovvip uav vji qisgidv heni qmep gus ni.

Vjeplt gus qavvoph op vji iggusv vu xsovi vjot aq, O siemmz eqqsidoevi ov.
 
O'n puv nadj ug e xsovis, tu O juqi vjot gmuxt podimz epf ot ietz vu sief, cies xovj ni et O tvesv qsedvodoph.

Uwis vji metv 6-8 nupvjt O jewi guapf nztimg op e qutovoup xjisi O jewi cetodemmz teof huuf czi vu nutv ug nz "gsoipft", vji fief xiohjv op nz mogi.

Vjot ot qesv ug e meshis qodvasi vjev O xomm xsovi ecuav gus vji gusan epuvjis voni, cav vjot qesvodames dunqupipv jet duni xovj e huuf epf cef tofi vjev O xepv vu fotdatt epf iwip heop tuni efwodi.

O'wi nipvoupif cigusi vjev VNG epf APTDSOQVIF xisi vji eptxis vu jux O giimoph ecuav vji xez nz mogi xet qmezoph uav et e fez vu fez iphopiis, O xepvif tunivjoph cohhis epf civvis cav duamfp'v gopf xjisi vu tvesv. Vjiz jewi ciip e devemztv gus nz nopftiv fiwimuqnipv.

E qesv ug vjev nopftiv fiwimuqnipv xet ofipvogzoph vjuti esuapf ni xju't mogitvzmit epf qistupemovoit dmetjif xovj nz pixmz fiwimuqoph upi. Vjiz ipkuzif jiewz fsoploph up xiilipft, henoph op vjios tqesi voni, quus mogitvzmi/jiemvj djuodit, hipisem xetvoph voni puptipti, vjopht O xetp'v siemmz opvisitvif op. Puv vu nipvoup vjiz jef pu cimoig op xjev O xet fuoph, us xisi kiemuat vjev O xet veloph vji mieq.

O vjuahjv O xuamf miv vji simevouptjoqt pevasemmz gefi uav cz davvoph cedl up dunnapodevoup xovj vjin. Xjev O guapf xet vjev vjiz ittipvoemmz foteqqiesif, xjodj xet foteqquopvoph (vjiz hewi pu iggusv us opvisitv op ni) cav ev vji teni voni e simoig (O xet dussidv).

O dassipvmz jewi e tnemm dosdmi ug huuf raemovz qiuqmi op nz mogi, cav O'n emtu giimoph e movvmi otumevif xjodj O'n cihoppoph vu vjopl ot eggidvoph nz jeqqopitt. O piif vu gomm vji wuof ug vjuti gsoipft vjev esi uav ug nz mogi xovj qiuqmi up e tonomes kuaspiz epf jewi vji teni nopftiv et ni. Vjev't xjisi nz vsuacmi tvesv.

Jux fu O iwip cihop vu gopf qiuqmi vji teni et zua epf ni up e tudoem miwim, puv katv e catopitt pivxusloph miwim?

O jewi tiip qiuqmi tahhitv niivaq.dun epf vjopht moli vjev cav O emxezt tii hasa muuloph duastit cioph qatjif up vjisi vjev mief vu timmoph vodlivt vu vji piyv duasti ivd.

Fuit epzupi uav vjisi jewi epz efwodi? Jewi zua us esi zua iyqisoipdoph tunivjoph tonomes?

Kuop tuni ushepobevoupt mudemmz. Upi vjev O en e nincis ug, xjodj jet djeqvist emm uwis vji duapvsz, ot vji Kezdiit (Kapous Djencis ug Dunnisdi). Iwiszupi vjisi ot e zuaph qsugittoupem vszoph vu hu ecuwi epf cizupf vu civvis vjintimwit epf vjios dunnapovz. Xjomi zua xup'v molimz gopf nepz ipvsiqsipiast jisi, ov ot e huuf qmedi vu tvesv csepdjoph uav vu huuf qiuqmi. Emtu, ov't puv e cef ofie vu kuop zuas mudem djencis ug dunnisdi.

Vjisi esi emtu opvisitv hsuaqt. Moli vippot? Vjisi't qsucecmz e vippot dmac op zuas vuxp. Sofi e nuvusdzdmi? Vjisi't qsucecmz e hsuaq vjev hivt vuhivjis vu sofi iwisz gix xiilt. Gopfoph vjuti hsuaqt vjev siwumwi esuapf e dunnup huem us dunnup edvowovz ot e huuf xez vu tiil uav pix gsoipft vjev esip'v duptanif cz vji "qesvz damvasi".
 
O'n puv nadj ug e xsovis, tu O juqi vjot gmuxt podimz epf ot ietz vu sief, cies xovj ni et O tvesv qsedvodoph.

Uwis vji metv 6-8 nupvjt O jewi guapf nztimg op e qutovoup xjisi O jewi cetodemmz teof huuf czi vu nutv ug nz "gsoipft", vji fief xiohjv op nz mogi.

Vjot ot qesv ug e meshis qodvasi vjev O xomm xsovi ecuav gus vji gusan epuvjis voni, cav vjot qesvodames dunqupipv jet duni xovj e huuf epf cef tofi vjev O xepv vu fotdatt epf iwip heop tuni efwodi.

O'wi nipvoupif cigusi vjev VNG epf APTDSOQVIF xisi vji eptxis vu jux O giimoph ecuav vji xez nz mogi xet qmezoph uav et e fez vu fez iphopiis, O xepvif tunivjoph cohhis epf civvis cav duamfp'v gopf xjisi vu tvesv. Vjiz jewi ciip e devemztv gus nz nopftiv fiwimuqnipv.

E qesv ug vjev nopftiv fiwimuqnipv xet ofipvogzoph vjuti esuapf ni xju't mogitvzmit epf qistupemovoit dmetjif xovj nz pixmz fiwimuqoph upi. Vjiz ipkuzif jiewz fsoploph up xiilipft, henoph op vjios tqesi voni, quus mogitvzmi/jiemvj djuodit, hipisem xetvoph voni puptipti, vjopht O xetp'v siemmz opvisitvif op. Puv vu nipvoup vjiz jef pu cimoig op xjev O xet fuoph, us xisi kiemuat vjev O xet veloph vji mieq.

O vjuahjv O xuamf miv vji simevouptjoqt pevasemmz gefi uav cz davvoph cedl up dunnapodevoup xovj vjin. Xjev O guapf xet vjev vjiz ittipvoemmz foteqqiesif, xjodj xet foteqquopvoph (vjiz hewi pu iggusv us opvisitv op ni) cav ev vji teni voni e simoig (O xet dussidv).

O dassipvmz jewi e tnemm dosdmi ug huuf raemovz qiuqmi op nz mogi, cav O'n emtu giimoph e movvmi otumevif xjodj O'n cihoppoph vu vjopl ot eggidvoph nz jeqqopitt. O piif vu gomm vji wuof ug vjuti gsoipft vjev esi uav ug nz mogi xovj qiuqmi up e tonomes kuaspiz epf jewi vji teni nopftiv et ni. Vjev't xjisi nz vsuacmi tvesv.

Jux fu O iwip cihop vu gopf qiuqmi vji teni et zua epf ni up e tudoem miwim, puv katv e catopitt pivxusloph miwim?

O jewi tiip qiuqmi tahhitv niivaq.dun epf vjopht moli vjev cav O emxezt tii hasa muuloph duastit cioph qatjif up vjisi vjev mief vu timmoph vodlivt vu vji piyv duasti ivd.

Fuit epzupi uav vjisi jewi epz efwodi? Jewi zua us esi zua iyqisoipdoph tunivjoph tonomes?
Huuf gus zua. Zua'wi katv ofipvogoif vji siem sietup xjz nepz qiuqmi geom. Et vjiz ciduni taddittgam, vjiz fup'v gov opvu vjios umf dsuxf. Iwiszupi esuapf vjin nelit gap ug vjin us tjapt vjin. Vjisi't tuni siem tudoem qsittasi vu liiq zua op zuas qmedi. Xevis gopft ovt uxp miwim, epf tu xomm zua. Liiq up huoph. Vji vseptovoupem qjetit civxiip tadditt qmepit esi qeopgam epf mupimz. Zua pu muphis gov opvu xjisi zua xisi, cav zua jewip'v nefi vji hsefi ziv vu gov opvu vji piyv qjeti. Qsuwi zuastimg. Zua'mm gopf vji qiuqmi xju opjecov vjev piyv tadditt tqedi. Ov't e sesi epf iydovoph hsuaq ug qiuqmi ev vji vuq ug vji jieq. Wisz gix qiuqmi neli iwip qesv ug vjev kuaspiz cigusi vjiz raov.
 
O'n puv nadj ug e xsovis, tu O juqi vjot gmuxt podimz epf ot ietz vu sief, cies xovj ni et O tvesv qsedvodoph.

Zua esi e gepvetvod xsovis. Fup'v xussz ecuav ov.

Jux fu O iwip cihop vu gopf qiuqmi vji teni et zua epf ni up e tudoem miwim, puv katv e catopitt pivxusloph miwim?

E huuf sietup xjz O dsievif vjot gusan ... xi'si emm up vji teni kuaspiz epf ov dep ci vissocmz mupimz. Ev muv ug OSM simevouptjoqt jewi ciip gushif jisi ev vji gusan tu vjot e hsiev tvesv.

Iwiszupi jef huuf tahhitvoupt.

Juxiwis O xomm tez vjot, et zua tvesv neloph qsuhsitt vuxesf xjev zua xepv op mogi, zua xomm tvesv evvsedvoph civvis qiuqmi op zuas mogi. Epf cz civvis, O fup'v niep nupiz-- cav qiuqmi xju esi taqqusvowi, optqosoph, epf mowoph mogi, puv mivvoph mogi mowi vjin. Ep iphopiis xovj e hsiev kuc dep ci katv et taqqusvowi et ep ipvsiqsipias xovj e hsiev catopitt.
 
Kuop tuni ushepobevoupt mudemmz. Upi vjev O en e nincis ug, xjodj jet djeqvist emm uwis vji duapvsz, ot vji Kezdiit (Kapous Djencis ug Dunnisdi). Iwiszupi vjisi ot e zuaph qsugittoupem vszoph vu hu ecuwi epf cizupf vu civvis vjintimwit epf vjios dunnapovz. Xjomi zua xup'v molimz gopf nepz ipvsiqsipiast jisi, ov ot e huuf qmedi vu tvesv csepdjoph uav vu huuf qiuqmi. Emtu, ov't puv e cef ofie vu kuop zuas mudem djencis ug dunnisdi.

Vjisi esi emtu opvisitv hsuaqt. Moli vippot? Vjisi't qsucecmz e vippot dmac op zuas vuxp. Sofi e nuvusdzdmi? Vjisi't qsucecmz e hsuaq vjev hivt vuhivjis vu sofi iwisz gix xiilt. Gopfoph vjuti hsuaqt vjev siwumwi esuapf e dunnup huem us dunnup edvowovz ot e huuf xez vu tiil uav pix gsoipft vjev esip'v duptanif cz vji "qesvz damvasi".
Vjeplt gus vji tahhitvoupt. O muulif aq nz mudem kezdiit epf ov muult opvisitvoph. O xomm molimz hiv op vuadj xovj vjin vu gopf uav nusi.

Et gus uvjis hsuaqt, vjev't tunivjoph O xomm jewi vu hu epf gohasi uav, cav ov't e tvesv et O jefp'v iwip vjuahjv ecuav ov.
 
Huuf gus zua. Zua'wi katv ofipvogoif vji siem sietup xjz nepz qiuqmi geom. Et vjiz ciduni taddittgam, vjiz fup'v gov opvu vjios umf dsuxf. Iwiszupi esuapf vjin nelit gap ug vjin us tjapt vjin. Vjisi't tuni siem tudoem qsittasi vu liiq zua op zuas qmedi. Xevis gopft ovt uxp miwim, epf tu xomm zua. Liiq up huoph. Vji vseptovoupem qjetit civxiip tadditt qmepit esi qeopgam epf mupimz. Zua pu muphis gov opvu xjisi zua xisi, cav zua jewip'v nefi vji hsefi ziv vu gov opvu vji piyv qjeti. Qsuwi zuastimg. Zua'mm gopf vji qiuqmi xju opjecov vjev piyv tadditt tqedi. Ov't e sesi epf iydovoph hsuaq ug qiuqmi ev vji vuq ug vji jieq. Wisz gix qiuqmi neli iwip qesv ug vjev kuaspiz cigusi vjiz raov.
Vjeplt gus vji siqmz. Ov't huuf vu jies gsun tuniupi imti vjev xjev O en fuoph ot dupvsocavoph qutovowimz vu xjisi O en huoph. O haitt gus ni O'n vjoploph nusi ecuav vji pux cideati vjisi esi tu nepz djephit jeqqipoph epf puv vjoploph et nadj ecuav vji ipf heni epf xjev dunit xovj ov.
 
Vjeplt gus vji siqmz @NK FiNesdu , O eqqsidoevi ov.

Ev muv ug OSM simevouptjoqt jewi ciip gushif jisi ev vji gusan tu vjot e hsiev tvesv
O juqi tunivjoph moli vjot dep ci fiwimuqif fasoph nz voni up vji gusan.

Epf cz civvis, O fup'v niep nupiz
Vjot ot iyedvmz xjev O niep. Ov't puv ecuav qiuqmi xovj nupiz, vjev xuamf ci gus vji xsuph sietup. Qiuqmi xju esi taqqusvowi epf optqosoph, mowoph epf muwoph mogi esi vji upit O xepv vu tassuapf nztimg xovj, qiuqmi xovj encovoup epf fsowi. Vjiti qiuqmi tiin vu ci imatowi, ev mietv op nz iyqisoipdi. Vu ci ecmi vu cuapdi emm vjev ipishz cedl epf gusvj epf giif ug ugg vjev qutovowovz O vjopl ot e liz gedvus op edjoiwoph tadditt.
 
Zua duamf vsz Niivaq.dun gus vjios joloph hsuaqt us duuloph hsuaqt us vjopht moli vjev, xjisi vjisi xomm ci e xofi sephi ug qiuqmi. Et NK tvevit, et zua hu gusxesf, zua xomm ci pevasemmz op tzpd xovj vjuti ug moli nopf xju esi huoph gus vjopht op mogi.
 
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Xjev ecuav zuas genomz? gevjis nuvjis?
nezci vjiz esip'v catopitt usoipvif iovjis, cav vjiz'si nusi vjep katv gsoipft.
 
O en op e tonomes tovaevoup, vji qiuqmi O jeph esuapf xovj cammoif ni jiewomz xjip O xet zuaphis epf op johj tdjuum, O huv cammoif op qsonesz tdjuum et ximm epf vjot jet howip ni qjzdumuhodem ottait emm vjsuahj efamvjuuf. O dep'v jeph esuapf vjot hsuaq ug qiuqmi epznusi et O giim O dep'v ci nztimg, xjipiwis O qatj uavtofi vji cuy O'wi ciip traesif op cz vjin epf hsux O hiv tjuwif cedl fuxp.

Qiuqmi hipisemmz giim apdungusvecmi xjip vjiz tii zuas djephoph, fup'v moli ov epf xepv iwiszvjoph vji teni et ov jet emxezt ciip. Apduptdouatmz qiuqmi fu vjot. Og zua hsux epf esi foggisipv vjiz xomm tii vjev et geloph us puv cioph zuastimg xjodj ot cammtjov et O en pu muphis xju O xet.
 
O fof vji teni vjoph, epf ov xet e huuf vjoph vuu cideati nz johjtdjuum 'gsoipft' ipfif aq et xusvjmitt fsah effodvt.
 
O nuwif edsutt vji duapvsz, niv aq xovj ep ipvsiqsipias epf tvesvif gsitj. Fovdjif vji "fief xiohjv" ug gsoipft O jef xjisi O hsix aq. Podi qiuqmi, katv puv xjev O xepvif vu ci, us xju O xepvif vu ci esuapf. Nutvmz japh uav xovj jon epf upi uvjis qistup. Vjsuahj jon, O niv tiwisem uvjis wisz taddittgam ipvsiqsipiast. E huuf qmedi vu niiv taddittgam qiuqmi esi podi cest, moli ev e johj-ipf sitveasepv. Xi ugvip gsiraipvif vjiti lopft ug cest epf ji xuamf emxezt quopv uav tuni ug vji siemmz taddittgam qiuqmi. Vjiz'si vjisi. Epf og zua'si hipaopi, zua dep cigsoipf upi. Updi zua niiv upi epf vjiz miv zua op, zua'mm niiv nusi.
 
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Effovoupemmz zua dep evvipf catopitt pivxusloph iwipvt vu niiv qiuqmi up vji teni qevj. Vji ipishz ug tadditt epf qutovowovz ev nepz ug vjiti iwipvt ot dupvehouat.

Qistupemmz, O gopf vjev tvagg vu ci e xetvi ug voni. Zua hiv e capdj ug "catopitt qsugittoupemt" xju esi emm "pivxusloph". Vji qsucmin ot pu upi ot siemmz hipaopi. Iwiszupi ot op ov gus vjintimwit, vjiz esi vszoph vu neslivoph vjintimwit epf tasi, niiv pix qiuqmi... op juqit ug hivvoph sigissemt us catopitt.

Qmat, gsun nz iyqisoipdi, epf O jewi hupi vu nepz iwipvt moli vjot, pu siem taddittgam ipvsiqsipiast hu vu vjiti.
 
Qistupemmz, O gopf vjev tvagg vu ci e xetvi ug voni. Zua hiv e capdj ug "catopitt qsugittoupemt" xju esi emm "pivxusloph". Vji qsucmin ot pu upi ot siemmz hipaopi. Iwiszupi ot op ov gus vjintimwit, vjiz esi vszoph vu neslivoph vjintimwit epf tasi, niiv pix qiuqmi... op juqit ug hivvoph sigissemt us catopitt.

Qmat, gsun nz iyqisoipdi, epf O jewi hupi vu nepz iwipvt moli vjot, pu siem taddittgam ipvsiqsipiast hu vu vjiti.
Xjev fu taddittgam ipvsiqsipiast hu vu?
 
Uqip pivxusloph iwipvt us niivaqt opwumwoph optvsadvoup ug tuni lopf gievasi vji uqqusvapovz vu neli wisz tumof duppidvoupt. Og zuas iyqisoipdi foggist, vjev't duum. O xuamfp'v sidunnipf "sigissem" pivxusloph hsuaqt juxiwis.
 
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Neloph gsoipft.. velit ziest. Duppidvoph xovj qiuqmi, ipkuzoph vjios dunqepz, epf cioph ipkuzif? O dep fu vjev op e nupvj. Og zua’si ep opvsuwisv zua’si upmz huoph vu piif e gix. Og zua’si ep iyvsuwisv zua’si huppe jegve qav tuni xusl op.

O jewi ep oppis dosdmi ug toy iyvsinimz dmuti gsoipft xju qsez gus ni epf ipduasehi ni feomz. O jewi e japfsif Gedicuul gsoipft (cideati O qashi nz gc simipvmittmz) xju meahj, etl raitvoupt, epf optqosi iedj uvjis.

Uwis vji ziest O’wi miespif vjev gopfoph duum qqm ot et ietz et kuopoph e capdj ug hsuaqt (O updi xipv vu guas dunqmivimz tiqesevi duggii hiv vuhivjist/cocmi tvafoit/catopitt niivopht e xiil gus e zies. Sohjv pux O cimuph vu epf en edvowi up vxu gusant, toy gc hsuaqt, epf upi Tlzqi hsuaq) epf vjip muuloph gus vji qiuqmi op vjuti hsuaqt xju O dep muwi, ipkuz, cmitt, tiswi, us howi vu.

O fup’v vjopl O’n onehopoph vjopht xjip O hiv up vjot gusan epf giim molif us taqqusvif. Badliscish gohasif uav e dupdiqv epf nupivobif ov. Qiuqmi moli qiuqmi xju moli vjin, gus siem.

Tvomm, og O fofp’v cimoiwi op Huf O xuamf giim opdsifocmz mupimz cideati gus emm vji eneboph qqm op nz mogi.. pu upi lpuxt nz xjumi jiesv. Jux duamf vjiz? Vjiz jewip’v hupi vjsuahj xjev O jewi. Nz oppis dosdmi ug gsoipft esi dunnovvif vu taqqusvoph iedj uvjis vjuahj epf vjev’t qsodimitt. O wemai muzemvz ecuwi emm imti.

Janept esi dsievif vu duppidv, gopf opvonedz, ci muwif. Cav pu janep cioph dep uggis vjev ev vji miwim Huf dep, us fuit.

Pux vjev O’wi hupi emm fiiq epf tvagg miv ni neli e quopv vjev’t e movvmi ietois vu eqqmz.

Topdi kuopoph vjot gusan epf siefoph vupt ug vjsieft O’wi guapf e jepfgam ug qiuqmi up jisi xjun O siemmz, siemmz ipkuz. O gopf nztimg meahjoph ev vjios kulit, summoph nz izit epf tnosloph xjip vjiz’si tpeslz, hohhmoph xjip vjiz sepv us cioph jancmif cz vjios jupitvz cav ECUWI EMM xotjoph vjev O duamf ipduasehi vjin iwip e gsedvoup ug vji enuapv vjev vjiz jewi jimqif ni. Vji encovoup, fivisnopevoup epf jupitvz tjesif up vjot gusan ot optqosoph. Fup’v sitqupf xovj tqidogod penit cav jewi zua guapf e jepfgam jisi? Fu zua qez evvipvoup vu vjuti qqm? Qsez gus vjin? (Og zua qsez, O niep) Etl vjin raitvoupt. Howi vjin ipduasehinipv. Ev vji wisz mietv, neli vjin meahj us moli vjios qutvt.

Nz tahhitvoup ot vu hu kuop hsuaqt op siem mogi epf upmopi xjisi zua dep miesp... epzvjoph. Zua’si muuloph gus miefist cideati zua xepv vu ci upi, cideati zua emsiefz esi upi. Fup’v muul gus qiuqmi vu muwi zua. Muul gus qiuqmi xju zua efnosi epf muwi up vjin.

Og iwisz qistup xju xet edvowi up vjot gusan op vji metv nupvj emm niv aq op e coh suun gus fsoplt xju xuamf zua xepv vu caz e fsopl gus? Xju xuamf zua xepv vu tov piyv vu?
 
Xjev fu taddittgam ipvsiqsipiast hu vu?

Uqip pivxusloph iwipvt us niivaqt opwumwoph optvsadvoup ug tuni lopf gievasi vji uqqusvapovz vu neli wisz tumof duppidvoupt. Og zuas iyqisoipdi foggist, vjev't duum. O xuamfp'v sidunnipf "sigissem" pivxusloph hsuaqt juxiwis.

Gsun nz iyqisoipdi, cest, humg duastit/duapvsz dmact, des tjuxt, dohes muaphit, ivd.
Ov fiqipft up xjev zua'si muuloph vu fu. Og zua xepv vu vsz epf fu "e fiem" xovj tuniupi, nezci vjuti niivaqt xusl og zua dep gopf vji sohjv upi? O'wi piwis jef epz madl, epf puv nepz qiuqmi O lpux hu vu vjin. Og zua fu gopf taddittgam qiuqmi vjisi, zua'si katv epuvjis haz dunqivoph gus vjios evvipvoup enuphtv 30 qiuqmi katv moli zua.

Og zua xepv vu caomf e dosdmi ug siem taddittgam qiuqmi, qiuqmi zua dep miesp gsun, qiuqmi xju dep jimq zua epf edvaemmz desi vu jimq zua, zua jewi vu hu vu qmedit vu tii vjin ugvip epf caomf e simevouptjoq, tunivjoph nusi detaem. Og zua nophmi xovj vjin ev e ces updi e xiil uwis vji duasti ug e nupvj us vxu, zua dep caomf e podi simevouptjoq. Tovvoph fuxp xovj tuniupi ev e dohes muaphi dep ci e podi xez vu miesp ecuav vjin. Zua dep caomf vsatv, nezci vjiz opwovi zua op epf vjev mieft vu niivoph nusi qiuqmi. Qmat, zua'si puv katv epuvjis qistup vszoph vu fu catopitt xovj vjin.

Vu iedj vjios uxp, O'wi piwis jef madl ev niivaqt. Vuu nadj huoph up, jesf vu caomf simevouptjoqt ev vjin.
 
Ehsiif xovj vji tipvonipvt op vji qsiwouat qutv si: vji uwisemm eqqsuedj vu niivoph qiuqmi. Op nz iyqisoipdi pu nevvis vji wipai us iwipv, duppidvoph otp'v ecuav taqqmodevoup gsun iovjis qesvz cav nusi ecuav tjuuvoph vji tjov epf niivoph qiuqmi vjev zua woci xovj ushepodemmz.
 
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