G
GuestUser4aMPs1
Guest
Got to chat with someone today. Good kid about my age who's starting off in online business.
He's in a position I'm sure we've all been at some point. Reading all the blogs, soaking in ridiculous amounts of bro-marketer content, all peddeling the same b.s. ebooks and courses.
Naturally, I wanted to break him out of this mold and show business for what it is.
Helping people.
Bringing value.
Making deals.
Not 'passive income' or 'following your passion' or 'lifestyle design.'
Now, I usually refrain from chatting to this person in-depth because the conversations turns into tough love, and he's still steeped in the wantrepreneur world. The lightbulb hasn't gone off yet.
So, let's sit back and watch what happens, I thought. Maybe he'll 'get it' soon enough.
Nope.
He's been spinning his tires for the past 6 months. No progress - still reading and listening to the same garbage without taking any meaningful action towards creating a business.
We could have gone through the same tough love,
but more advice is surface-level and wouldn't make a meaningful difference.
I wanted to get to the bottom of this.
I asked, WHY do you want to be in business?
This simple question opened the floodgates.
He was constantly surrounded by soul-crushing negativity and drama.
From parents, family, and co-workers, with absolutely zero people to turn to.
At 20 years old, he has never moved out and lives in a toxic environment.
He ended up dropping out, failing at nearly everything he did afterwords.
Aimless and ending up at a dead-end job.
His whole world was crushed just by examining his expression,
left with zero hope for the future.
There's no telling what other hidden devils he's fighting.
The stuff you never share with anyone, fearing to even confront yourself.
His ultimate response?
"If I had a business, It would mean that I am autonomous and don't have to live with my parents anymore."
He recently decided to join the Navy just to have an 'out.'
Cool, it's a step up I guess.
But I also asked him WHY he wanted to join the Navy.
Same Response.
"It would mean that I am autonomous and don't have to live with my parents anymore."
Now I asked, paraphrasing;
"You don't really want to be in business or join the Navy,
you just want to feel the way you believe it will make you feel."
"Now, let's focus on the issue at hand: You want to be autonomous and out of your parent's house.
How else can you achieve autonomy and move out?"
I'm sure he'll answer this question on his own, but the point is this:
If you're struggling emotionally, financially, with your family, or whatever...
Entrepreneurship is NOT. THE. ANSWER.
You need to face your largest, glaring problems head-on.
After you've stomped those problems into the ground, you can ask "How else can I achieve x?"
If you ask this simple question, you may realize that the answer may not even lie in business!
For example, achieving Autonomy / Self Reliance for this guy at this point in his life would mean to simply move out. He has the financial ability to, but something was holding him back.
IF you decide business is something you'd like to get into, realize that it will be the hardest thing you ever embark on. Unless you free yourself from the problems that plague your mind, you will sabotage yourself AND your business.
There may be ONE big thing that's stopping you.
For me, a few months ago it was simply not making enough money at my job,
stubborn and unwilling to take a second job or freelance.
Not willing to do whatever it takes to make more.
Things only changed when literally the only way I could eat was to hustle.
Only at that point was I humbled, and the business eventually blew up.
Later in this conversation, I stared cold into his eyes and said:
"This business stuff is only going to be an escape from reality unless you make a change."
If you were on a marathon run and had a 75lb weight dangling around your left leg,
how far do you think you'd go?
Drop the weight.
Only then can you run like hell.
...
The second point is be kind.
There are a lot of people in the world with real, debilitating problems; Even others on the forum.
It can be very easy to look at someone action-faking, step up on the advice soapbox,
and get frustrated when it's not acted on.
But is it worth getting frustrated?
If you really take a moment to consider it,
there may be people on this forum that don't actually want a business deep down.
They just want a better life and are moderately interested in business - that's okay.
I could have written off this kid.
Instead he entrusted someone with offloading deep pain:
The impact of which is likely greater than any business advice I could ever give.
...
This probably has been addressed elsewhere, but felt compelled to share here.
Maybe you got sucked into the self-help illuminati ring looking for answers and ended up here.
The point is if you ask yourself the right questions, you'll find the right answers.
They're right in front of you - Business is not the magic bullet to all life's problems.
He's in a position I'm sure we've all been at some point. Reading all the blogs, soaking in ridiculous amounts of bro-marketer content, all peddeling the same b.s. ebooks and courses.
Naturally, I wanted to break him out of this mold and show business for what it is.
Helping people.
Bringing value.
Making deals.
Not 'passive income' or 'following your passion' or 'lifestyle design.'
Now, I usually refrain from chatting to this person in-depth because the conversations turns into tough love, and he's still steeped in the wantrepreneur world. The lightbulb hasn't gone off yet.
So, let's sit back and watch what happens, I thought. Maybe he'll 'get it' soon enough.
Nope.
He's been spinning his tires for the past 6 months. No progress - still reading and listening to the same garbage without taking any meaningful action towards creating a business.
We could have gone through the same tough love,
but more advice is surface-level and wouldn't make a meaningful difference.
I wanted to get to the bottom of this.
I asked, WHY do you want to be in business?
This simple question opened the floodgates.
He was constantly surrounded by soul-crushing negativity and drama.
From parents, family, and co-workers, with absolutely zero people to turn to.
At 20 years old, he has never moved out and lives in a toxic environment.
He ended up dropping out, failing at nearly everything he did afterwords.
Aimless and ending up at a dead-end job.
His whole world was crushed just by examining his expression,
left with zero hope for the future.
There's no telling what other hidden devils he's fighting.
The stuff you never share with anyone, fearing to even confront yourself.
His ultimate response?
"If I had a business, It would mean that I am autonomous and don't have to live with my parents anymore."
He recently decided to join the Navy just to have an 'out.'
Cool, it's a step up I guess.
But I also asked him WHY he wanted to join the Navy.
Same Response.
"It would mean that I am autonomous and don't have to live with my parents anymore."
Now I asked, paraphrasing;
"You don't really want to be in business or join the Navy,
you just want to feel the way you believe it will make you feel."
"Now, let's focus on the issue at hand: You want to be autonomous and out of your parent's house.
How else can you achieve autonomy and move out?"
I'm sure he'll answer this question on his own, but the point is this:
If you're struggling emotionally, financially, with your family, or whatever...
Entrepreneurship is NOT. THE. ANSWER.
You need to face your largest, glaring problems head-on.
After you've stomped those problems into the ground, you can ask "How else can I achieve x?"
If you ask this simple question, you may realize that the answer may not even lie in business!
For example, achieving Autonomy / Self Reliance for this guy at this point in his life would mean to simply move out. He has the financial ability to, but something was holding him back.
IF you decide business is something you'd like to get into, realize that it will be the hardest thing you ever embark on. Unless you free yourself from the problems that plague your mind, you will sabotage yourself AND your business.
There may be ONE big thing that's stopping you.
For me, a few months ago it was simply not making enough money at my job,
stubborn and unwilling to take a second job or freelance.
Not willing to do whatever it takes to make more.
Things only changed when literally the only way I could eat was to hustle.
Only at that point was I humbled, and the business eventually blew up.
Later in this conversation, I stared cold into his eyes and said:
"This business stuff is only going to be an escape from reality unless you make a change."
If you were on a marathon run and had a 75lb weight dangling around your left leg,
how far do you think you'd go?
Drop the weight.
Only then can you run like hell.
...
The second point is be kind.
There are a lot of people in the world with real, debilitating problems; Even others on the forum.
It can be very easy to look at someone action-faking, step up on the advice soapbox,
and get frustrated when it's not acted on.
But is it worth getting frustrated?
If you really take a moment to consider it,
there may be people on this forum that don't actually want a business deep down.
They just want a better life and are moderately interested in business - that's okay.
I could have written off this kid.
Instead he entrusted someone with offloading deep pain:
The impact of which is likely greater than any business advice I could ever give.
...
This probably has been addressed elsewhere, but felt compelled to share here.
Maybe you got sucked into the self-help illuminati ring looking for answers and ended up here.
The point is if you ask yourself the right questions, you'll find the right answers.
They're right in front of you - Business is not the magic bullet to all life's problems.
Dislike ads? Become a Fastlane member:
Subscribe today and surround yourself with winners and millionaire mentors, not those broke friends who only want to drink beer and play video games. :-)
Membership Required: Upgrade to Expose Nearly 1,000,000 Posts
Ready to Unleash the Millionaire Entrepreneur in You?
Become a member of the Fastlane Forum, the private community founded by best-selling author and multi-millionaire entrepreneur MJ DeMarco. Since 2007, MJ DeMarco has poured his heart and soul into the Fastlane Forum, helping entrepreneurs reclaim their time, win their financial freedom, and live their best life.
With more than 39,000 posts packed with insights, strategies, and advice, you’re not just a member—you’re stepping into MJ’s inner-circle, a place where you’ll never be left alone.
Become a member and gain immediate access to...
- Active Community: Ever join a community only to find it DEAD? Not at Fastlane! As you can see from our home page, life-changing content is posted dozens of times daily.
- Exclusive Insights: Direct access to MJ DeMarco’s daily contributions and wisdom.
- Powerful Networking Opportunities: Connect with a diverse group of successful entrepreneurs who can offer mentorship, collaboration, and opportunities.
- Proven Strategies: Learn from the best in the business, with actionable advice and strategies that can accelerate your success.
"You are the average of the five people you surround yourself with the most..."
Who are you surrounding yourself with? Surround yourself with millionaire success. Join Fastlane today!
Join Today
