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Bought a huge house with a 3 car garage and a pool!

MJ DeMarco

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You've been here nearly two years. You've bought this house just a few months ago. A true Fastlane mindset would have not "upgraded" to the bigger house and instead waited until you could have afforded it via your biz ventures, or high paying Slowlane gig.

If it were me, I'd sell the house and move somewhere where I can focus on debt and increase my available time.

Since you just bought it, your loss can't be too much since the market hasn't really changed. Throw it up on an MLS listing service ($500), give the buyer agent 3%, and sell it yourself. But I'm going to guess that doesn't really interest you because lets face it, you love where you live and it justifies your pain and turmoil.

In the end, you've upgrade your stuff, but downgraded your choices, your free time, and your dreams. Again, lifestyle servitude (the hedonic treadmill) is mentioned over and over in TMF , and around here-- once again, this is evidence that people don't act by being told the fire is hot, they act when they burn.

right now I'm focusing on blogging and podcasting.

These aren't businesses, but marketing mediums. And both are grossly saturated and overdone. IMO, it's not leading the crowd, it's following it.

Action and meaningful action are two different things.

Good luck, I hope we hear positive updates.
 
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LeftBench

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Hey all just a quick update since the last time I've been on here.

Got about another $17k debt paid off. Working hard to keep up the pace with that. Things are going well on that front.

House is finally under contract... we are looking to close on this sale March 24. We should be walking away with about $30k in our pockets which will go straight to debts.

I am seeing a light at the end of the tunnel.

I realize I've said some things on this thread that were pretty stupid along with a very few things that have made sense. Re-reading it has me wondering what the hell I was thinking at times. I received some harsh criticisms (deserved) and have created a few E-Friends via PM who are in similar situations. With all of that said, I want to thank all of you who have taken the time to comment, positive or negative. It has really helped me with getting through all of this.

My stress levels have gone down tremendously and my wife is much happier too. Instead of worrying as much we are able to enjoy our family more. We aren't out of the woods yet, but we're definitely armed with machetes and clearing the path.
 
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JasonR

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So...you're bragging about your Pool and 3 Car garage in Jersey, except you can't pay the bills?

Have you thought about selling the house and renting, and putting the rest of the money into a business?
 

LeftBench

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Hey, everyone. Figured I'd give a quick update. My family is doing very well. We are loving life in our smaller, cozier home. I'm closer to work, and we are able to pay the bills. We just returned home from a trip to Disney World. Its nice being able to take trips and actually be able to pay for them, rather than just put everything on credit and regretting it all.

I'm still working my regular job. The house is almost completely fixed up on the inside and we still have some stuff to take care of outside of the home. Doing it slowly over time as the money comes in.

I've been working on a product that I'm excited to launch in the future. I work on it at night after the kids go to sleep, while the wife watches T.V., or in the morning after a night shift while the kids are at school and the wife is working. (Also at work when its slow but shhh)

That badass jeep that I bought a few pages back was awesome and lasted a while. Started having issues with it so I sold it for exactly what I paid for it!! Bought another beater, a pickup truck that looks terrible but runs well. I mainly use it to get to and from work with my wife having the "reliable" car for transporting the kids around.

Both of the kids are in preschool. Next year my older son moves on to kindergarten, which will save us a lot of money each month! My wife also started working part time at the preschool. Extra income is helpful but she also gets us a nice discount on the preschool tuition which is nice.

Anyways, there isn't much else to report. Still plugging away, just much happier and healthier than I was when I started this thread. I'm amazed at the PM's I still get on here (and some on IG) from people who tell me I've motivated them. I was definitely a disaster! I'm glad I was able to turn things around and if you're in a similar situation don't give up... you can do it too! I still haven't "made it" or reached true "Freedom" but I'm still a lot better off than I was, and now I have the time and money to work on other ventures, without all of the stress.

I hope all of you and your families are well. Enjoy the holiday season and let's all go and absolutely crush 2018.

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Cavking

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I think your kids look pretty happy in the photo and I would imagine you and your wife love your new home our you wouldn't have bought it.

You now have a reason to work harder than you ever have before so I think it is a good thing.

I am the opposite - I have no debt, cash in the bank to take a couple of years off work, a great credit line and credit rating, no kids, no girlfriend or urge to make any big purchases. I rent a small 2 bed apartment, I rarely drink, I don't smoke or do drugs. I spend my weekdays waking at 5am doing 70 hour weeks and then going home to work on my own businesses, my weekends are spent either working on my own business or visiting my mother and father. I have paid for my car, although it is a 4.8 litre bmw (which is the only thing I waste money on).

Am I any happier than you are? Probably not. I have more freedom than you have, but when your house is paid for, you will have a nice lump of cash sitting there.

I don't think you made a mistake, I think you overstretched yourself and you have now exchanged your free time for time to work, but enjoy the house and the smiley family photos.

Try your damned hardest to switch to fastlane in the meantime and keep doing what you need to do, we have plenty of time to sleep and relax when we are 6 feet under.
 
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LeftBench

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Don't mean to bring back an old thread but I just wanted to give an update.

The house is officially on the market. We might make a few bucks off the home which would be nice. The plan is set to rent a cheap place after the house sells. We will be moving in with my parents in between the sale of the home until we find a rental.

We are going to move to the town we used to live in, the town I work in currently at my slow lane. It'll be a shorter drive to work and more time with family. More time to dedicate to a Fastlane venture as well.

I've paid down credit card debt considerably but still have a ways to go. Once we are relieved of this mortgage then I'm going to dump a ton of money into the CC debt till it is gone.

It took me a while to put the house on the market, but I'm glad its finally done. Our realtor honestly believes we will get $25k - $55k more than we paid for it just 9 short months ago. While that would be nice, we will just be happy to get rid of it with enough to take care of the closing costs.

Hope you all have an excellent weekend!
 
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LeftBench

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I hope everyone is crushing 2019.

Happy to report that our credit card debt is finally at $0.00!!!!!!!!!!

We are happy for many reasons, one being that my wife and I had our third child (3rd boy!) in October of 2018. So life has been crazy but awesome.

We kept our eyes on the goal. We strayed a bit and overspent here and there, but we are so pumped to be out of credit card debt finally.

Just wanted to let you all know. I hope everyone is well.
 
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LeftBench

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And now I'm up to my eyeballs in debt.

I make a decent living from my Slowlane job, but obviously its not what I want in life, which is why I am here. Recently my family and I upgraded to a much nicer home on a bigger piece of land. I knew that money was going to be tight, but didn't realize it was going to be THIS tight. We've been racking up some debt on the credit cards and are just barely able to cover all the bills. I have a few loans that will be paid off soon, making it easier to make sure all the bills will be paid, but I'll definitely still be living paycheck to paycheck.

This is possibly the best thing to ever happen to me though. I needed a kick in the a$$ to get myself back into the Fastlane mindset. Now that I'm feeling the heat knowing that I need to be making extra money to keep this roof over my family's head, I KNOW that I will succeed.

Thanks to the MF book and this forum, I have a much different MINDSET than I had years ago. I am making different CHOICES and I am experiencing a level of MOTIVATION that I've never experienced before. Old me would be blaming my poor choices on bad luck, my job, someone else, etc. New me is using this as a motivator to go out there and find some needs and kick some a$$.

Have a great night all.
 
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MJ DeMarco

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Small update. We closed on the sale of our house today. After all fees and what not we are walking away with just over $27,000.00 which will be used towards debts.

The amount of happiness and relief we are feeling right now is incredible.

We have been staying with my parents for the last week. It's an adjustment but it has been going extremely well.

Next step is sell the pickup truck.
Another small debt related update for anyone following my progress.

Yesterday, on Easter, we handed my Grandmother a $20,000.00 check. Felt awesome.

I just paid $7,000.00 into another credit card about 2 minutes ago.

Got a text from my mechanic today, the Jeep is ready. Meaning I will sell the pickup truck this week, hopefully leaving me with about $7,000.00.

Thread upgraded from Notable to GOLD.

Incredible progress. I'm happy for u an the wifey! Although your progress isn't about building a business, it is about building a discipline and a long-term vision. Very Fastlane.
 
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MJ DeMarco

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Interesting that this story isn't about a business project.
It isn't about a first sale or a business idea breakthrough.
It isn't about "I did $100K last month!" or some explosive income goal.

It's about taking control and reclaiming your freedom by simply getting out of debt.

Discipline is rewarding, and it's a step all of us can take, no matter where we are in the process. :thumbsup:
 

jlwilliams

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OK. Your feeling the pressure and you are pumped to take some action to get past this self inflicted debt storm. I don't get the impression you are bragging about your position, I get the impression you are owning up to it. I believe I get it.

You can't just tease us like this. You tell us you are in deep and that you have the proverbial gun to your head. That's what they call a 'cliffhanger.' We need to see the hero of the story (that better be you, since you are writing your story) save the day and beat the villains who's names are Debt and Mediocrity.
 
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LeftBench

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Another update for you guys... nothing earth shattering but I'm plugging along -

The house is still on the market. We've had a few serious inquiries but no official offers. We've lowered the price as far as we can go without being in the red post-sale. I have a good feeling it will sell soon, but we will see.

I've finally taken action on a project I had been thinking about for a while. It feels good to be working on a non-Slowlane venture and I believe it has serious Fastlane potential. I haven't been able to focus as much time on it as I'd like, though, because I have things I need to take care of first.

The biggest one of those things is clearing out the debt I had mentioned earlier. I'm still working on paying off the massive amount of debt I had incurred. Wife and I are paying cash for everything now and paying off the debt. It is more than I realized but we are getting it paid down bit by bit. I'm working as much overtime as I can without sacrificing all of my family time. I won't keep this up forever, but will do what is needed to eliminate this debt that has been hanging over our heads.

I finally admitted to myself that I do not need to be making car payments on a newer vehicle. I can buy a nice shiny new vehicle in the future when I am running a successful Fastlane business. After the winter or after my house sells and I move closer to work, whichever comes first, I will be selling my 2 year old (purchased new) 4WD pickup truck and buying a beater car in cash. I am sick of making unnecessary $525/month payments. Especially since I have 3 years of payments left.

An extra $525/month to pay into the credit card debt will be nice. Also, eight months from now a pension loan that I had taken out will be paid off, giving me another $835/month to pay into these bills. I also switched my health insurance plan, freeing up approximately $200/month, and received a raise of about $1,200.00/year for January.

The old me would have thought that this $1600.00(approximately) per month extra that I will be pocketing would be enough to keep me afloat and in this house. I'm smarter than that now, thankfully, and will be using it to pay down the debt.

Like I've said before, I'm not driving in the Fastlane at the moment... but I'm working hard as hell to get there. Hope all of you are well.
 

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Another small debt related update for anyone following my progress.

Yesterday, on Easter, we handed my Grandmother a $20,000.00 check. Felt awesome.

I just paid $7,000.00 into another credit card about 2 minutes ago.

Got a text from my mechanic today, the Jeep is ready. Meaning I will sell the pickup truck this week, hopefully leaving me with about $7,000.00.
 
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LeftBench

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We found someone to lend us the money to pay off our CC bills in full with 0% interest. Thankfully a family member helped us out. We have already begun paying this family member back, it is good to know that the loan is interest free. Getting out of debt is #1 priority.

House is going on market soon. Just paid $1600.00 for new septic pump, $600.00 for septic pump out and $1100.00 to get central air working correctly. Pain in the a$$ but it had to get done.

Told my father (who is very supportive in all aspects of life) about our decision to sell the home and move into a condo. He highly disagrees and stated he would help us financially until we are able to handle it on our own. I grew up in a large house with a big yard and he said he wants his grand kids to have the same thing. Said he will even give me $1-2k a month to help with bills if needed. This is not the right decision, IMO. If I can't afford it, I can't afford it. His offer to help is much appreciated but it does not solve the big problem. The condo will only be a 1-2 year thing, hopefully. We are still going to move.

I've been reading much more on here but not posting much. I have much to learn and posting will not help my cause ( unless its valid questions). Trying to soak in as much info as possible.

I'm on Upwork now (not Fastlane by any means but it will help me get out of debt). Big thanks to @SinisterLex for his thread about Upwork / Odesk. Very informative and helpful.

I have taken a few overtime shifts at the Slowlane. Started bringing my laptop to work and working on my time off.

Yesterday I dusted off TMF and plan on re-reading it. I'm hustling now and its helping, but I need to get back into the Fastlane mindset.

The last two weeks have been hard but also wonderful. Making the decision to sell the house was hard, but now that I have it in my mind it is like a large weight off of my shoulders. Hopefully it sells quick.
 

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I'm on Upwork now (not Fastlane by any means but it will help me get out of debt). Big thanks to @SinisterLex for his thread about Upwork / Odesk. Very informative and helpful.

I have taken a few overtime shifts at the Slowlane. Started bringing my laptop to work and working on my time off.
Your mindset about working to get out of debt and defining it as slowlane is misguided. Many people use jobs as a bridge to the fastlane. Get it into your head that you are taking steps toward prosperity...
 
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GreedyBGoode

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My impression is your place is quite spacious - any way to AirBnB or sub-let it to ease your financial burden? Rent out parking spaces? Use the pool for swimming lessons for neighbourhood kids? Turn your liability into an asset. Make your weakness your strength.

Then you won't need to OT and you'll get more time to work on your fastlane project.
 

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With all due respect, you didn't quote the next sentence, which stated I'd be working on my Fastlane venture as well. Bottom line is at this point in my life I still need to focus on the slowlane as well until I get my finances back in order.

It seems that many people relate working on a job to slowlane. The job itself is not! A job can help you build capital to be used toward your overall goal. You have trapped yourself in as you are already aware. Just keep plugging away on your fastlane plan.
 
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Free Debt Ties and The Materialistic Lifestyle

Congrats on the success man. Your pulling yourself out of that rut slowly but surely.

You seem to now know the realization of an actual dollar and how critical and crucial it is to surpassing the average population as far as net worth and lifestyle. You have to sacrifice that fake ballin' mentality and just suck it up to reap the benefits later.

You start spending money before it's in your pocket and you end up in a pile of debt and working for the people who you are in debt too. I see it more and more everyday..You also can't make any big moves to the fast lane if your trapped.

I still work a F/T job but have my side business gross $200k ecommerce for 2015. A co-worker just bought a new BMW car but only put $2k down and is paying the $500-700/month to have a nice car. I still drive my 1997 civic beater... Works great and I pay barely anything for it. I probably got 5 times more cash in the bank and earn probably 2 times yearly then they do. But yet from the outside, it is perceived that he is "richer". I'm perfectly fine with that because 3-5, 10 years down the road.. That picture will be much more different.

Can't think on the same paths as people in our local area as most of those people are living the 9-5 life.

I always say to myself...Every time I spend.. I'm taking my hard earned profits and putting it in another rich man's pocket. Granted there are things you do need and that is fine and dandy but if you don't need it and you are just spending to spend. That's a losing battle 100%.

All products, most products are a source of income for a business or entrepreneurs. We all trade time for money or money for time.

Getting out of the non-ending and losing cycle of a consumer is the first step.

Build your own cycle for others to run in (aka business/fast lane) is the next step.

Work A Slow Lane + Side Business Hustle

I work a regular job 9 to 5 and hustle an e-commerce site that has grossed $200k. Ecommerce was perfect since I work a 9 to 5.

Plan on selling in 2016 and aim for higher goals and build a new eCommerce which fixes the downsides of my current. Start small and grow bigger. Once you get that positive cashflow and have more saved.

You now have capital to make bigger moves.

There are ton's of ideas and businesses to make on the internet.

IMO, Anyone only ever needs about $20k/net profit per month to live nice. Spend $5k/net and save $15k/month is awesome!

I plan to quit soon within the year. I'm hoping to also gross $250k/net for 2016 but plans to smash that goal but I'm keeping it realistic. My goal is $250k/net saved and $15k/net profit. Spend $5k/month max.. I plan on moving to a cheaper city/area and buying a $200-300k house and will focus on growing my saved capital to $1 million using paid advertising.

Your on your way!!! Keep up the good work!
 

LeftBench

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Haha well I feel like an idiot.

So...you're bragging about your Pool and 3 Car garage in Jersey, except you can't pay the bills?

I'm definitely not bragging. In fact, I'm admitting that buying this home was a mistake. Instead of sitting around feeling sorry for myself I'm using my mistake to motivate myself to work harder. I created the thread title to get people to click on the post, and I immediately admit in the post that I've screwed up.

Have you thought about selling the house and renting, and putting the rest of the money into a business?

Yes. Right now if we sell we will take a massive loss. We are seriously thinking about selling, though, as soon as it makes more sense financially.

I think you're tricking yourself here. Having almost all your money attached to debt and bills is one of the worst positions to start a business IMO, because you can't really afford to lose anything. I also don't really understand why you decide to upgrade after knowing cash is gonna be tight. Good luck

Thank you for your good luck wishes. At this time I'm focusing less on starting "that big business" and am focusing more on passive (and non-passive) income systems online. Blogging, podcasting, etc isn't very expensive to get going. It's also something I can work on during downtime at my Slowlane. Once some money frees up I may consider other options, but for now I am keeping it cheap because of the position I've put myself in with my bad decisions. I'm also doing less Fastlane stuff on the side to make as much side money as possible. This will not last forever.

When did you buy the house?

We closed in January of 2015.

So the numbers did not work and you made the decision anyway?? Do that in business and you will not be in business long.

Yup. You're absolutely right. In life, like in business, we all make mistakes. This was probably one of my worst ones. But I will work hard and rebound from it. I am not in the position where I will lose my house, I am able to get by. I just have to keep working my a$$ off and I will turn the tables.

Moving on...... What is your plan of action?


Work my a$$ off and put some more money in the bank. Non-Fastlane stuff. Work lots of OT at the Slowlane. All while doing the Fastlane stuff on the side. Don't want to get into too much detail as to what my current projects are, but I'm working. I just need to stick with it, keep a high level of motivation, and keep chipping away and working hard. In the past I've let myself get lazy. I'm not going to let that happen again!

OK. Your feeling the pressure and you are pumped to take some action to get past this self inflicted debt storm. I don't get the impression you are bragging about your position, I get the impression you are owning up to it. I believe I get it.

That's definitely it. Not bragging at all... I know a big house with a 3 car garage means nothing here. There are folks on here with millions in the bank, driving Lamborghinis. Me buying a house I can't afford isn't really something to brag about. I'm sorry some felt that I was bragging, that definitely was not my intention at all. I just made that thread title to get clicks so I could share my story. I am definitely motivated.

You can't just tease us like this. You tell us you are in deep and that you have the proverbial gun to your head. That's what they call a 'cliffhanger.' We need to see the hero of the story (that better be you, since you are writing your story) save the day and beat the villains who's names are Debt and Mediocrity.

Thanks for this! I won't consider myself any type of hero until I can give my family the type of financially free life I've been imagining for them, but I sure will be working my a$$ off against those damn Debt and Mediocrity villains. :)
 
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LeftBench

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Another small update I forgot to mention. Purchased a used Jeep Grand Cherokee that is in really good shape. Co-worker's daughter used it as a daily driver. I got it for a steal at $1k. It's currently at the mechanic shop to find out what type of work it needs (Mechanic is my wife's cousin thank god). It's an old car, 2000, but in good shape for what it is and low mileage for that year. Basically I just need something with 4WD that will get me back and forth to work which is about 2 miles from my parents' house. My wife's car will be the one we drive the kids around in.

I am selling my pickup truck as soon as we close on the house sale (been using it a lot to move stuff). I owe just under $16k on it and the two dealers I spoke to both said I can get about $23,500.00 for it. $525/month payment gone and a few bucks in my pocket which will go to jeep repairs and/or debt paydown.
 
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LeftBench

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It takes a real man and truly dedicated father to take a hard look at what he is doing in life. Saying to himself "Ive f*cked up here" and then proceed to fix it. Well done!
Your kids may never realise what you did or went through but I'm sure watching them happily reaping the benefits its more than thanks enough.

Reading this makes my eyes tear up, but in a good way. Thank you so much mrarcher. There were nights where I was working and I would go and drive to a spot where nobody could find me and I would just cry. I knew I was ruining my life and the life of my family but I was too afraid to do anything about it. Thankfully I was able to man up and start to fix things. This forum was so, so instrumental in helping me take that first step. Like I've said before, I'm not out of the woods yet but I know we will get there.

I'm so excited about the future and what this new lifestyle of discipline and dedication will bring. Once we are completely out of debt, the opportunities will be endless.

My sons may never know what I went through, but I'll be sure to teach them what I've learned. Its definitely been an invaluable experience.
 

MJ DeMarco

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No debt + no boss = freedom to me.

Throw in a few million bucks on top of it. Then we're talking "f*ck you" freedom. :)
 

LeftBench

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Small update. We closed on the sale of our house today. After all fees and what not we are walking away with just over $27,000.00 which will be used towards debts.

The amount of happiness and relief we are feeling right now is incredible.

We have been staying with my parents for the last week. It's an adjustment but it has been going extremely well.

Next step is sell the pickup truck.
 

LeftBench

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Here is the old house (The one that the first post of this thread was about)

http://imgur.com/bySExMO

http://imgur.com/B5cAAT2

http://imgur.com/KOSishq

http://imgur.com/GSchbJQ

The quality of the pics is bad because I took the pics with my cell phone. But you get the point. For some reason I couldn't upload the photos on here so I just linked them.


Lastly I present to you the house that we are currently in the process of purchasing. Like I said, it's nothing special. But its in a neighborhood we know we love and once we fix it up it will be a nice little home. A nice little home that is MUCH less expensive than our last one, lol.

http://imgur.com/LdpPQUZ
 
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andviv

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Awesome thread.

Some quick notes:

1. You and your wife both have a great support system, and I am glad to see you appreciate that and please, please, never take it for granted.
your grandma's loan was a life saver.
your parents' willingness to take you in is also great.'
The monetary value of just those two aids is huge.

2. Be mindful of the tax implications of the house sale. You made a profit and lived in it for less than two years, I guess you have some taxes to pay on it. Owing to the IRS is terrible (remember Al Capone!)

3. I admire the way you took the criticism and harsh comments during this thread. I just found it today, but the way you handled it, and the way you considered the feedback, tell me you have learned a lot and your ego shouldn't be an obstacle for you anymore in this life.

and last but not least, thank you for keeping us up to date.

I have learned a lot from you and this thread.
 

Gsuz

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I think you're tricking yourself here. Having almost all your money attached to debt and bills is one of the worst positions to start a business IMO, because you can't really afford to lose anything. I also don't really understand why you decide to upgrade after knowing cash is gonna be tight. Good luck
 

LeftBench

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Thanks for updating us.

Sounds like a great result. Well done.

What are your biggest learnings to date?

Thanks Andy. What I've learned most from this experience is to use my brain more and not jump into major life decisions so recklessly. My wife and I bought a house we couldn't truly afford because we got ourselves so excited about all the nice things about it. "We'll make it work" was something that was said multiple times when it was brought up how tight money would become. I was so focused on thinking about all the great times we could have at this house and refused to acknowledge the fact that there would be severe financial strain.

While it has been frustrating for sure, I am confident that in 5 or 10 years from now I will look back at this experience and think of it as a positive one because I learned a valuable lesson.
 
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LeftBench

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Small update. Doing great in the debt department but still not completely out. Still living with parents for now. Put the big move on hold for the time being and will be staying in NJ. That may change in the future but for now we are staying.

We don't want to live with the parents forever, so we are buying a new house. Nothing outlandish or crazy this time. A small fixer upper that we are getting a good deal on. Pics to follow.

Still chipping away at the debt and also putting some money in the bank for house related stuff. Feels good not being drowning in debt. On a very positive note my credit is around a 740. Years ago I had DESTROYED my credit and was around a 575. Hovered in the mid-600's for years. Nice to see it improve. Paying off a lot of the debt definitely helped too.
 

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