Writing your own story

[redshift]

I finished reading Unscripted again recently. I think this was my 3rd time around after reading it twice a few years ago. Great book btw, always inspires the crap out of me. What's crazy, though, is how I always pick something up which I completely missed in the previous reading.

Now, to speed things up after reading the book the first time, I tend to skip the first couple of parts. I recall them being a bit gloomy for my taste, and I'm already well aware of all the shenanigans "the script" is up to. So I usually just start the book at Part 4 — Execution. That's the meat of the book anyway, and where it starts getting really interesting if you ask me.

So here I am, hopping along in my usual approach. Opening the book to my neatly doggy-eared favorite section .. Part 4 ..

But… right as I eagerly opened page 93 while sipping my delicious Caffè crema (Clearly, I'm in Europe), which was supposed to be a decaf, but I'm not quite sure what this drink even is and pretty sure I ended up with a full-maybe-double-strength shot I know I can't handle and am now completely wired.. (again) The book flipped back one page with a gentle gust of wind...

Suddenly, something right at the end of Part 3!? captured my attention.

The same Part 3, which I always skip over…

Right there at the end of Page 90.

Hiding in plain sight.

I couldn't believe how I had missed this before… (umm, maybe because you keep skipping it.. Duh!)

"An extraordinary life will require an extraordinary story. Whenever hardships, failures, and struggles are encountered, you are simply drafting the story." - @MJ DeMarco , Unscripted , Part 3, Page 90

Woh.

Since I've been writing a bunch of fiction recently. This gave me some serious *chills*. I knew exactly what MJ was talking about.

Something just clicked.

Holy Sh*t.

I immediately put the book down and started writing. I took it literally and, in my caffeine-infused mania, wrote a full story outline about my life.. past, present, future, ups, downs, highs, lows, failures, struggles, where I am, where I want to go, how to get there... everything...

It wasn't easy. But nothing worth doing ever is.

At first, I immediately started thinking of all things which usually frustrate me…

… Part 1 …​

Like getting sucked deep into the trenches of the slowlane like a black hole for most of my youthful, energetic twenties. Ouch. Then it hit me like a rock. You know what? It was just a setback. Here's another way to look at it― If it wasn't for the soul-crushing humdrum of the slowlane… I probably wouldn't have found TMF so revitalizing. It was only the balance being so off in one direction that the opposing force could have the strength to slingshot me forward.

Then I realized the same thing with my first few post-fastlane "failures," and a bunch of other stuff, and a bunch more. Same thing. No big deal. Just setbacks. As MJ said in the book, "you are simply drafting the story." Stuff like this is just what makes a story interesting, right?

Think about it…

No one wants to watch a movie where everything is just perfect. That would be boring. It's all the "hardships, failures, and struggles" which make a story interesting. Would you really want it any other way?

Well, you can do the same. Simply write your own story, and figure out a way to get your character (i.e., YOU) out of the predicament and transform them into where you want to go.

Oh, and feel free to do so at any point in this post whenever something clicks. It's a long one. Maybe grab yourself a double shot of espresso for the ride (if you can handle it).

"If you want your life to be a magnificent story, then begin by realizing that you are the author." ― Mark Houlahan.

*​

Maybe you are stuck in the same place as before and don't know where to start. Well, you are on this forum, so go ahead and read MJ's books. If you've read them already, read them again. Like I said, I always pick up something new each time around. Even though I thought there was no way I could have possibly missed anything. That's just what happens when you grow. You start seeing things you might have missed. From different perspectives. The same words can string to an entirely different tune.

Maybe you made a start, but are now at a low point and unsure where to go. You might even post about it here and get a bunch of flak for it. I say don't worry about it. People here are tough! Why? Because hardship is just part of the journey. They expect you to encounter it. It only makes your character stronger. You don't want a boring story, do you? Keep going.

Maybe you even started along the path, but something unexpected happened… like a pandemic hit, derailing your progress for a couple years, or perhaps something more personal, like health issues, or something else entirely. No worries, more struggles. It's only making the story that much more compelling when you overcome it. Keep going.

Maybe you got lost in the desert of desertion for way longer than you should have, and competitors are now swooping in and taking your market share. NO! Sucks you in like quicksand, doesn't it? Always wanting just a little bit MORE. That's why it's called the desert... of desertion. No worries. Write yourself an FTE and get outta there. You owe it to yourself. Simplify, and Keep going.

Maybe you keep getting distracted by shiny new projects instead, even though you are well aware this isn't a good idea. Or maybe you just gave up too early, right before hitting GOLD! Or maybe you got addicted to social media while trying to sell your product on social media. facepalm No worries. Everyone loves a good comedy sketch. That'll get some giggles outta them. You are even more aware of it now. Focus on what's important, and Keep going.

Maybe you started a business, and it was a complete and total flop. Despite you thinking that it was going to take off like a rocketship. No worries. Just a failure. Without failure, you wouldn't know what success looks like. Figure out why, and Keep going.

Over time, you keep on chugging, keep on building, keep on growing, keep on evolving. It's all part of an extraordinary story you are crafting and the transformation from zero to hero, just like any great plot.

*

… Part 2 …​

But.. what if you've transformed already and it wasn't the answer?

What do you mean?

Well …

Maybe you kicked a$$ in business, made a bunch of $$$, then lost it all? Woh. All of it? Gulp. Now that's even more captivating. No sweat. You did it once. Most people never get there in their whole lives. You have experience now. I'm sure you can do it even better the second time, maybe with some more discipline. Everyone loves a good comeback story. The whole world is rooting for ya. I know I am. Keep going.

Or maybe you still have all the $$$ but lost your purpose instead? Well, that's deep. But, same thing... Find a new meaning. No one said you have to stick to one thing your whole life. You have many more resources to fall back on now. Most people are just busy paying the bills. And the next adventure will just make the story that much more enchanting. Maybe this was a trilogy all along, and now you are on Part 2? Keep going.

Or maybe you took a break and are now ready to take on even bigger challenges, like the great visionaries of the world. You start with one business success, then move on to the other, and another, and finally end up changing the whole frikkin world. Sounds like a fantastic story to me! Keep going.

Everything is just part of the extraordinary story, that is... Your Life.

Think of it as a movie.

Where do you want it to go? You can write it as you please…

*​

Well, now here we are, right in the same section where this post was born in MJ's book…

… Part 3 …​

But… What if you write a magnificent plot for the future, and you get hit with something completely unexpected along the way? Something you could never have imagined. Never in a million years. Well, now we are talking! It's almost guaranteed to happen. That's the beauty of life, the unpredictability of it. You see, the plot is just a guidepost. You can (and should) aim for the best, but it might not play out how you want it to. Just think of the event as a plot twist. Everyone loves plot twists in movies, don't they? Keep going.

But I will add one thing that's important to remember when drafting your story... Now I might get some flak for this because it's a tough love forum, and this is a bit flowery, but I'll write it anyway (consider it a Plot Twist) —

You might be the hero in your own version, but you are unlikely to be the hero in other people's story. Everyone has their own story, remember? Obviously, they'll want to be the hero in their own story. So your aim should just be to be one of the good characters in their version. You can be a mentor/guide/friend/inspiration in theirs, but you can't be the hero. That's for them to be. You wouldn't want someone else to be the hero in your story, would you?

Here's a good way to look at it— Simply aim to leave an impression on the world that makes other people realize they were happy to have encountered you in their story. Or, as entrepreneur and spiritual teacher Michael Singer put it— "The highest life you can live is when EVERY moment that passes by you is better off because it did."

I'm still working on this part myself. It ain't easy. But nothing worth doing ever is. Do this often enough, and you might just end up making the world a better place. Now that would be a pretty cool story, wouldn't it?

*

… Part 4 …​

Umm… there's more? … Why?

You bet. Told you it would be a long one. But hopefully, something clicked, and you've been writing along because this is the real meat of the post.

Here's the real twist.

Almost everything above applies to the Brand you are building as well. Especially the stuff at the end of Part 3. Read through it again and see it through the lens of your brand. I'll let you see it for yourself. You'll see exactly what I'm talking about.

.
.
.

Maybe write your brand an extraordinary story while you are at it too.

Think about it …

Just like you, it has two — A back/about story and a future/mission story. Just like you, it was born from struggles. Either your own or someone else's. Just like you, it has a mission and a vision. Something it stands for. Just like you, it's trying to make the world a better place. By bringing the best out in people and allowing them to be the hero in their own stories.

And just like you, it has another element— The present. The present is where you take action and build continuity between the past and future. It's where you take a stand and make your story come alive. Think of it like a bridge. Just like in your story (and it is your brand, after all), the present glues everything together and brings your vision to life.

Keep this stuff in mind while drafting the story. It will make your brand more human, just like you.

MJ talks about this in Unscripted as well. It's right there in the smack-dab middle of… you guessed it … Part 4 … Another something I missed in the previous reading. LOL, did I even read this book before? Perhaps.. but memory fades away. We are human, after all. That's why it's important to read stuff you found invaluable over and over again... and write sh*t down!

Go get em.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Black_Dragon43]

I don’t know - I’ve never been concerned about my story, or reframing my failures or any of that. I just failed something. What’s there to reframe about it? What use is saying “oh wait a minute, just till you see my comeback?”

It’s a waste of energy.

My focus is on doing the best with what’s in front of me. If I do that well, the rest will take care of itself. If my story is good or not, that’s a concern for others, but not for me. Why would I care what a few lads think of me for a few short years? 200 years from now, Steve Jobs will be forgotten. Steve who?

The way I see things, people who usually have these thoughts are never successful. The people who are successful just do things, stay focused on their own stuff, and what they need to move ahead.

Just my 2c, feel free to ignore it if you don’t like my opinion.

 

[redshift]

I don’t know - I’ve never been concerned about my story, or reframing my failures or any of that. I just failed something. What’s there to reframe about it? What use is saying “oh wait a minute, just till you see my comeback?”

It’s a waste of energy.

My focus is on doing the best with what’s in front of me. If I do that well, the rest will take care of itself. If my story is good or not, that’s a concern for others, but not for me. Why would I care what a few lads think of me for a few short years? 200 years from now, Steve Jobs will be forgotten. Steve who?

The way I see things, people who usually have these thoughts are never successful. The people who are successful just do things, stay focused on their own stuff, and what they need to move ahead.

Just my 2c, feel free to ignore it if you don’t like my opinion.

I think you missed the point of the post

But, for completeness, here's why the story matters --

"As UNSCRIPTED entrepreneurs, we’re fiduciaries first and capitalists second. Put your customers’ best interests in front of your own. Deliver the value you promise. Make the world a better place, and money shall follow." - MJ DeMarco, Unscripted

This is why.

Success is more than just bulldozing ahead at all costs as you suggest above.

200 generations from now, Steve Jobs will be forgotten. Steve who?

Great job in editing 200 generations down to 200 years right as I was about to hit reply. I was gonna say -- That's some far out thinking right there. When in fact, we are all living right here, right now. Where everyone knows the answer to the question -- Steve who? In fact, you answered it yourself in the previous sentence.

But that's part of what this post is about-- Writing your own story, not someone else's. Get it?

 

[Oso]

This is ultimately why the idea of "legacies" is foolish, imo, and is reserved for the handful of entrepreneurs that have ingrained their companies into the very fabric of human existence/luxury.

You'll only remember "Versace" because it's in relation to a name, and I don't see them rebranding any time soon.
You'll only remember "Gucci" because it's in relation to a name, and I don't see them rebranding any time soon.
You'll only remember "Lamborghini" because it's in relation to a name, and I don't see them rebranding any time soon.

Eventually, time forgets everyone and everything, even the rich, unless your company is engrained into humanity in of itself. Even then, at some point, Ferruccio Lamborghini as an individual may be forgotten (to everyone outside of said company). I would go as far as saying there will be a point in time when no one remembers people such as Michael Jackson.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.