Why I despise Pickup Artistry, and how to have a fulfilling sex life.

[ChrisV]

Now your remedy to the needy guy who has never had a girlfriend in his life or can't even get a girl to make out with on a night out is: Instead of pretending to be cocky/funny/confident, JUST BE CONFIDENT.
:O

That's rather silly. We would all love to have confidence oozing out of our ears, but it's not exactly teachable. It takes a long time to become confident in yourself, you have to face your fears, you have to become unaffected by it.

It's not though, if you real my second post.

I think we need to break down the work 'confidence' and make a distinction between Self-Efficacy and Self-Esteem.

Self-efficacy is a person's ability to do a task. Self-Esteem is a person's perceived self worth. When talking to girls, it's a combination of both, but Self-Esteem is a much larger factor. If someone is stuttering and stammoring while talking to a hot girl, it's not so much because he doesn't have 'practice' it's because he doesn't value himself in relation to her. If you were talking to a homeless person you wouldn't be stuttering and stammering and worrying what he thought. Those behaviors come from feeling you're in the presence of someone superior. It's a self esteem issue. Sure practice has something to do with it, but Self-Esteem is the biggie.

"Nice Guy" syndrome is exactly that. You feel like you have to defer to superior men and women.

And that's the point. Why is she 'out of your league.' Why do you value your league so little and hers so much? Who defines 'below average'... what makes you feel like you're below average? Why do you look for validation outside yourself.

I'll quote Eckhart Tolle on this:

A beggar had been sitting by the side of a road for over thirty years. One day a stranger walked by. "Spare some change?" mumbled the beggar, mechanically holding out his old baseball cap. "I have nothing to give you," said the stranger. Then he asked: "What's that you are sitting on?" "Nothing," replied the beggar. "Just an old box. I have been sitting on it for as long as I can remember." "Ever looked inside?" asked the stranger. "No," said the beggar. "What's the point? There's nothing in there." "Have a look inside," insisted the stranger. The beggar managed to pry open the lid. With astonishment, disbelief, and elation, he saw that the box was filled with gold.

I am that stranger who has nothing to give you and who is telling you to look inside. Not inside any box, as in the parable, but somewhere even closer: inside yourself.

"But I am not a beggar," I can hear you say.

Those who have not found their true wealth, which is the radiant joy of Being and the deep, unshakable peace that comes with it, are beggars, even if they have great material wealth. They are looking outside for scraps of pleasure or fulfillment, for validation, security, or love, while they have a treasure within that not only includes all those things but is infinitely greater than anything the world can offer.

That feeling people get when a hot girl is stroking their ego? Someone with high Self-Esteem feels like that all the time. They don't seek approval, because they just approve of themselves. And a side effect of that is that girls throw themselves at them as well.

 

[ChrisV]

Dude my thread got moved into the mens locker which i dont have access to. I created a thread about something similar, I ended up going on a date with this girl and it went great. and you actually came in and helped me with good advice by telling me: be confident but honest and present.

No problem man.

I wonder why you can't see that forum. Try setting your sex in your profile.

And wow, I'm really glad things went well with that chick... congrats!

 

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[bibbysoka]

@Johnny boy is one of the top contributors here and is my personal favorite, whether his posts relate to something I am directly involved in or not. I've never encountered someone so prolific, so honest, and damn near genius when it comes to business acumen.

It's too bad that you need advice in the first place, and it's incredibly sad that you slam one of the best contributors here. I rate you accordingly, so back at ya.

This forum is all about advice exchange. For you to say that its too bad that I needed advice is pretty sad mate.

Dont take things personal.

 

[Bearcorp]

I'm not disagreeing with you here, but society drills into our heads from a very early age that women, in particular very beautiful women, only go for a certain type of guy.

Society drills into us to get a job, get a mortgage, work for a boss, go to college etc etc. Don't be limited in your beliefs, or do, if thats the way you want to roll.

 

[Real Deal Denver]

This forum is all about advice exchange. For you to say that its too bad that I needed advice is pretty sad mate.

Dont take things personal.

LOL

It's not all about you.

You were slammed - a tiny bit - because you slammed @Johnny boy. How did you miss that? Possibly because you can't see how you treat others? Instead, you only see the comment that was directed at you.

It's not all about you.

It's not personal in the least. Nothing was taken as an insult directed to me. However, I'm not going to sit by and have you insult someone that I highly respect. Get that? It's not all about you all the time.

And yes, it is kind of sad that you feel you need advice to - talk - to women. No shame in that - we've all been there.

Now, back to important topics. I'm here for business, not for shy developing males trying to scrape up the confidence to talk to women...

 

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[Mattie]

"This excerpt from Adam Curtis' documentary "Century of the Self" produced in 2002 for BBC illustrates how Edward Bernays, the founder of the field of public relations, manipulated the masses into considering that the idea of women smoking must be associated with that of freedom. The background mechanism is being explained very clearly, and Edward Bernays himself, in an interview filmed in 1991 admits to what public relations really are at the origins. "

Thank you for the resources, I will take a look at it. I'm open to new information all the time. I assure you, I'm very familiar with the different conscious levels of relationships since I have a Human Service Degree and have talked with the Masculine and Feminine since 2007, and have studied a lot, but you can never have enough information and always upgrading is necessary.

I really am not one to manipulate others into thinking anything. Really, what I understand from my experience, isn't you have three/four generations with different views on relationship styles. We've entered a time where technology is playing a huge part in interfering in the natural process of relating with one another in huge ways.

I believe there is a rise in domestic violence and child abuse in the side walk and perhaps Middle Class, but there is a process we each go through. As we know with entrepreneurship, business, and even a job, when your in a relationship, this ties together, because the feminine and masculine usually do well, and more in harmony, unity, and peace if they're headed in the same direction in life, both educated, and have the growth mindset instead of the fixed mindset.

Most of us go through a process of events with the masculine and feminine throughout our life time. This does have to do with the culture, society, parenting, and environment one is raised.

I'm personally not afraid to rock the boat, because I know this is my personality. I know the masculine and feminine don't always like what I have to say when I give them advice. Some of them don't want to hear it. Some of them are resistant, and some are open to it and listen.

Statistics are nice, numbers are nice, but I'm more one who will walk on the front lines, hear the masculine and feminine from both sides, hear their stories, and see the bigger picture, the long-term games, and the consequences of their choices and actions. The family as a whole.

While that has been a major task in studying, doing observational research, and studying everything, this is the only way, you can really get in depth of what is happening.

Depression, Anxiety, PTSD, all play into this as well. With stress being a huge factor in different social classes in different ways.

What works and what doesn't work? Why?

 

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[ChrisV]

Statistics are nice, numbers are nice, but I'm more one who will walk on the front lines, hear the masculine and feminine from both sides, hear their stories, and see the bigger picture, the long-term games, and the consequences of their choices and actions. The family as a whole.

The problem with that is you don't get a representative sample. Our own biases make us selectively choose who to interview. It's fine to interview people to see the human side, but statistics are more accurate.

 

[Real Deal Denver]

When you’re secure attachment with genuine confidence, you just rock up to a chick, make it obvious you’re trying to take her home with you, and 9 times out of 10, she will. And it will be based on who you are. None of this cocky/funny body language bullshit.. none of this silly ‘hard to get’ nonsense. She’s there trying to meet someone to go home with. It’s the entire reason that bars and clubs exist.

And while we are simplifying things, for the benefit of the young males here, let me explain how the above statement works in the real world.

Maybe some young males out there think rocking up to some chick is a good ploy. Here's some news for you; computer dating fast forwards past this crap and gets to the nitty-gritty. Women understand this, and they don't want to waste their time with some guy with too much testosterone, or too many narcissistic tendencies. You can love how great you are when you go to the gym and watch yourself do every single curl in the floor to ceiling mirrors, as you sculpt your magnificent physique to match your solid gold irresistible celebrity worthy personality. That never gets old, does it?

If the "chicks" go home with you 9 out of 10 times, then you have certainly won a great reward, haven't you? You now have a loose woman that went out that night to find some loose guy, so they could both be loose and have a real good time together. If that's as deep as your relationships are, then go ahead and indulge.

And closely related to that is this; "she's there to meet someone to go home with." No - she's playing a game, perhaps the best or only way she knows how. What does she want then?

Women use sex to get a relationship. Men use a relationship to get sex. That's as basic and primal as it gets.

Got that now? I can make it a lot more complicated if that's what you really want. But do we have to?

I don't have a PhD in anything. Too bad, because if I did, everyone would believe me.

So how do I know that I'm right? Decades of experience, and learning through observation - and surprisingly, learning a lot from several women that I was involved with in very deep relationships.

I have women that I've dated that I did not have sex with, because sex sex sex just wasn't in the top five list of what was important. I'm very very close friends with all of them to this day. I would say that I could, if we were both single, propose to them over the phone and they would accept. How's that for results? Who cares about scoring a one night stand by rocking up to some chick? I have women that will commit their LIVES to being my partner, lover, and best friend. And, as much as it hurts me to say this - it's not because of my stud qualities, good looks, or charming personality.

Hopefully. Hopefully, this will provide a ray of light for those that are surrounded by the hype of how to rock up to some chick - and instead learn to be a caring man of strength, character, wisdom, and devoted love. EVERY woman wants a man like that. Looks and bedroom abilities? On the list - but way down on the list.

Just for fun, I've asked MANY women that I know that if Tom Cruise walked in the door, and they had to choose to go out with him or me, who would they choose? Hold on. Almost all of them chose me. I asked why and they told me that the number one person in Tom's life would be Tom, whereas the number one person in my life would be THEM. Take that Tom!

By the way, I'm not a ten. I'm not even a 9 and a half. I consider myself a 6 or 7 maybe, on a good day, based on just looks and personality. I laugh at all the idiots that have blinders on that THINK they can, and that they deserve, a ten... Keep dreaming boys. But I DO beat the "ten men" day in and day out - every day of the week. Brad Pitt - Tom Cruise - bring em on.

So much more to say here. I should write the no-nonsense book of how to "not rock up to a chick" and instead how to get more happiness than you ever hoped for or imagined was possible.

Out ~

 

[ChrisV]

quotation :
"The political elite are members of the class of people who are incapable of accurately understanding, by themselves, the complex "unseen environment" wherein the public affairs of the modern state occur; thus, Lippmann proposes that a professional, "specialized class" collect and analyze data, and present their conclusions to the society's decision makers, who, in their turn, use the "art of persuasion" to inform the public about the decisions and circumstances affecting them.[2]

This is kind of a conspiracy theorist way of looking at it. This is part of what I do working in Data Analytics. We don't manipulate the masses so much as analyze data to find trends so that policy-makers can make more informed decisions. In general its a good system, and most problems arise when we deviate from that system.

 

[bizkitgto]

deleted

 

[ChrisV]

deleted

i have that Denver guy on ignore... he literally writes the most batshit insane posts.. the only reason i saw what he wrote was because your reply with his quoted message got delivered to my email. i honestly think he's drunk half the time he's on here.

in regard to the message you originally quoted... LMFAO

 

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[ChrisV]

women who want the odd hook-up, and those that f*ck anything that moves

agree. but i think that men tho f--- anything that moves are just as bad.

i think the point here is we should be hold both sexes to the same standards.. i mean come on.. it's 2019

 

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[bizkitgto]

agree. but i think that men tho f--- anything that moves are just as bad.

i think the point here is we should be hold both sexes to the same standards.. i mean come on.. it's 2019

Men and women are very different, often opposites, thus we have different needs and standards. I think men above all else desire trust. Men fear women cheating. Trust matters more for men than women, and that's why men don't want to be in relationships with women that sleep around lot - it's hard to trust someone like that. I'm not sure what women desire over trust, because women seem to want men that other women want.

Here's the paradox. Women can get laid whenever they want, it's easy for them, that's why women that sleep around are called *easy* or *sluts*. Men don't desire these kind women for relationships, and women often slut shame them (my guess is women slut shame because they don't trust these women and fear they'll sleep with their man, women slut shame way more than men). For men, it's not easy to get laid. That's why guys who do it regularly are called playboys (think James Bond), they're celebrated, and the kind of guys that can do this easily are chased by women, and men want to be them. That's the duality of men and women, the yin and yang. This isn't politically correct to say, but we all know it's true.

 

[ExaltedLife]

there is a big market for dating advice and seduction

famous entrepreneur Eben Pagan won thanks to the seduction market

View attachment 25607

View attachment 25608


so you guys are saying that this is " bad ". everyone is unique .


but the market says "this is a good thing". millions of guys are buying products

so who is right ? you or the market ?

we are on the business forum but you are saying that the markets are wrong.

there is a problem


.

There are markets for methamphetamine and heroin and human trafficking too.

"What some people choose to buy" is not a proper standard of right and wrong. Money is not everything.

 

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[Real Deal Denver]

3) Millennial boys are more passive and socially inept. Self-explanatory. What do you expect from a generation that grow up with facebook, iphone and instal-grams. They suck at face to face communication and are less willing to talk to girls. Today’s bad boys are not really bad...they cannot even fight. I suspect they have lower sperm count and lower testosterone.

PUA is dying as girls do not go to bars anymore. That is partly true. Young boys today do not even do day games anymore. People who tried games ten years ago have retired and there is no nee blood. Do not expect today’s boys to approach a girl. They cannot even talk to people they already know and they prefer to text.

Yep. Pitiful isn't it?

Marilyn Monroe banged everyone.. from like 6 the Kennedies, to Marlon Brando, to screenwriters, to mob bosses. Women look up to Marilyn Monroe as much as men look up to Hugh Hefner. Women have Marilyn Monroe posters on their wall, post Marilyn Monroe quotes on their Instageam. Femme Fatales are often almost as revered as their seductive male counterparts.

And then we have the self-help cases that believe they have it all figured out. Unfortunately, there is usually some dumb female around to stroke their ego, which confirms that they have finally "made it" and are a man. Male perhaps - but far from being a real man.

Sometimes, it gets worse.

Some go on to the next phase and self promote themselves to the status of guru. I included the first quote to illustrate the pathetic types that actually do need a guru. This further strokes the egos of the gurus, and they then launch a thread like this one to find some sense of self-importance.

Why do they do that? Ah, that's another fine topic for another thread.

Just wanted to point that out, for the benefit of Mr. Putz boy who has never been able to relate to any of my threads on a mature level that would be representative of what he proudly declares himself to be. If he is what he projects himself to be, he would not go off on such a childish rant every time we cross paths.

But he's not. It's rare that I couldn't make someone look so bad, even if I wanted to. But I don't, and I doubt I even could. They just take off all by themselves like a spinning roman candle firework display. Fine. Now we see the fury of self-promotion when one feels threatened...

Don't. be. that. guy.

I will go along with being a brain tumor that sprouted fingers - as I have been taunted in the past. I give points for originality! That's a good one and is in the top three. For our entertainment, please don't give up on trying to top that one - hard as it may be.

If people reading this really think that women look up to Marilyn Monroe, then you really need a lot more help than you can get here. To put her persona into a more modern day example, if women think Madonna has it "going on" - then those women really really need help. But if you're a weak type that admires someone that has the gusto to strut around like they own the world and can turn any man's head - then I can understand why someone might admire them.

For those pathetic weak types, I present to you - the pathetic disgusting hollow celebrities for your ongoing admiration - and the gurus of the internet to go along with them and explain why "rocking a chick" is so important.

The one thing the gurus and I do have in common, is we both like to see the results when they are called on the carpet for promoting their self-absorbed authority status.

After this runs it course, Chris will again leave for a while, only to return when he has gathered enough information to make a point on something so profound that very few are mature enough to understand. This is his feeding ground that keeps his ego growing.

For all the others that truly need help, don't listen to anyone telling you how to be Mr. Macho lady killer. It's an empty game that leads nowhere. You will find yourself in time. It is like a rose blooming. It can't be forced. Stop worrying about it and like who you see in the mirror - and realize that you may never ever be James Bond or Marilyn Monroe - and that can be a very very good thing indeed. It's far better to be genuine, even if you can't rock the chicks. Some slick gurus even go so far, as in this case, as to tell you how fake it is to be a PUA, and how empty of a life it is - and then in the next breath tell you how great it is to "rock the chicks" so they want to go home with you for sex. So sad. Say one - or the other. I'm saying one, and if anyone has been paying attention, I'm saying that women are much smarter than men, and they're on to this stupid charade boys go through. You'll know when you are genuine when you realize that it isn't even important to rock the chicks. Leave the Marilyn Monroes for the James Bonds because they deserve each other. And leave the gurus to stand there wondering why not everyone loves them as much as they love. Themselves.

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

 

[ChrisV]

I will go along with being a brain tumor that sprouted fingers - as I have been taunted in the past. I give points for originality!

lmfao

 

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[guy93777]

Is PUA still around? I was of the opinion that after burning through their specific target audience those scammers pivoted to the bigger more general evergreen markets of self-development / inner game / confidence / whatever peddling their stuff. If I remember correctly they imploded years ago, wasn't "The Game" published like more than a decade ago?

PUAs proved that people are predictable and we can build systems to manage them

don't tell me that everyone "is unique " or any BS like that , otherwise we could not build systems

for example , this system ( the mystery method ) has a conversion rate up to 25 % , which is unbelievable

1 girl out of 4 slept with the PUA .


do you know a lot of things in life with a 25 % conversion rate ?

i don't

 

[ChrisV]

Women and men are opposites: women get laid easily, men don't.

on average... yes. but if you zoom in it's a little more complicated... male mating seems to adhere to a pareto distribution, where the top 20% of guys get the bulk of the attention from women. and this isn't stuff i'm coming up with off the top of my head, or just personally witnessed... it's a well-studied phenomenon.

"Superstar effect" accrue to males in the top 5% of looks online (Hitsch et al., 2006)




i think that study is a bit of an anomaly... normally what we witness is around 80/20.

so on average, yes it's harder for men to get get sex. the bottom 80% at least. but for the top 20%? it's easy as f--- becasue they have literally every girl competing for them. so it's easy for women to get laid in general. most women can go out and grab a random guy and take him home. But they don't want that. They want the top dog (or at least one of the top dogs) And for that, they're competing for his attention. So in that sense, it's a lot harder for them to get the guys they actually want. Because the ones they actually want are usually busy with a more attractive female.

this applies to hookups only. I don't want to keep going off on tangents because the strategy for hookups is completely different from the strategy for monogamy. the strategy for monogamy is pretty much equal. roughly speaking: men who are 10's date women who are 10's.. men who are 3's date women who are 3's

 

[Real Deal Denver]

I'm going to have to disagree here. You can't compare a Hollywood bombshell celebrity like Marilyn Monroe to normal women. Marilyn Monroe was a sex symbol, she oozed sex. Take your average, off the street girl that dresses like a stripper, parties, f*cks 5 guys a week on Tinder....maybe she's a waitress, maybe she's a nurse, doesn't matter - girls aren't' looking up to her, girls don't wish they were here, girls will gossip behind her back, say mean stuff to her face when they're drunk and warn men about her. If you've ever spent time with a group of women over wine, you hear a lot of gossip, mean and vindictive shit said about their so called friends. Women don't want to be labelled as a *slut*, it's terrifying to them - it's almost the same as being labelled a *creep* for men.

Women and men are opposites: women get laid easily, men don't.

And here is the lay up.

 

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[Real Deal Denver]

so on average, yes it's harder for men to get get sex. the bottom 80% at least. but for the top 20%? it's easy as f--- becasue they have literally every girl competing for them. so it's easy for women to get laid in general. most women can go out and grab a random guy and take him home. But they don't want that. They want the top dog (or at least one of the top dogs) And for that, they're competing for his attention. So in that sense, it's a lot harder for them to get the guys they actually want. Because the ones they actually want are usually busy with a more attractive female.

This much I can personally attest to as being completely true, for better or for worse - it is what it is. Being a top dog is not all it might appear to be. The women have ulterior motives so it's hard to make genuine friends with them when single. Now that I'm married, everything is cool.

 

[Kevin88660]

Can this really be described as a "high standard" though? If she doesn't qualify as long-term relationship material because she isn't his looksmatch and he's simply on a rebound or it's about convenience, etc. and she knows this (through similar situations), then it's the definition of having a "low standard". I mean what meaning is there talking about genetic material if there's no pregnancy involved, there is no goal the "high standard" is aiming for.

In the same way, you could say that she's not up to his standard because he won't stay with her and she won't have any offspring with him. In my opinion, there appears to be ground for calling this behavior slutty, especially if it's done regularly with full knowledge. Maybe it's "Look, it's 2019, bro.", I can accept that, but it's more a carefree / having fun attitude and not some high standard / genetic material theory which makes it look nicer and nobler. We aren't animals which are solely ruled by instincts, the high standard would be to look for a looksmatch to hookup with which has the potential to blossom into something more. If this is not the goal, because the "stud" is hotter, and the goal is fun, then so be it. This also applies to men btw.

The question appears to be in what way modern hookup culture is influencing the strategy for monogamy. I see that more and more of the (delayed) effects are slowly beginning to manifest at the edges (where communities rise up and grow). Women complaining about men not being interested in long-term relationships while at the same time ignoring their looksmatches and seeing their hookup partners as the golden standard. Men complaining that they were being ignored in their 20s, going MGTOW because they don't want to be the last resort for women past their prime (who had their fun in the past). There are also men having too high standards, thinking they can score models with average looks by studying some stupid openers or reading some pseudo-evolutionary nonsense. We have a mismatch in expectations and a lack of long-term thinking. There are no rules anymore.

That's why good-looking people always recommend to simply "be yourself," this is based on a positive feedback loop because with good looks you can get away with pretty much anything, even creepy behavior is charming. This is also why game "works" for some and not for others, there is no game. This is of course only about the extreme edges, as I said above, most people I know are quite functional. But the trend remains. I unfortunately expect that exacerbating ideologies/ideas will be spread because dysfunctional people generally spend more money on entertainment and other substitutes.

I totally agree with you on the mismatch of expectations. Men and women tend to overestimate their value in the market place a lot.

I think the hook up myth is overblown. People always imagine others hooking up. I last checked the stats college grad in America has four life time sexual partners and none college grads has six.

Think about it. This means that above average calibre people tend just have 2-3 sexual partners in their entire life. This is basically about having 2-3 relationships before marrying their husband or wife at age 30! Boring and typical!

The stats also match well with what I observe in real life. It is not being religious or deliberately conservative. People are just too busy to pursue this lifestyle due to study or work. This generation of millennials are more geeky and intellectual. In addition to that they are dealing with a harsh job environment. I just think that we should be cautious in making generalization to assume whatever social trends we see are due to people hooking up.

 

[Kevin88660]

One thing that has changed is porn. It's everywhere. And kids are watching it more than ever. Young boys have seen more naked women before they turn 15 than most adults have seen in a lifetime. What's weird about the world is as the porn-ification of society accelerates, the less and less sex men are having. We've all seen that study that found men between 18-30 are haven't the least amount of sex in history (see WaPo link below), with 30% of these men being sexless. Women are still getting laid though. I wonder why?

Tinder/Instagram make it easy for women to get lots of sexual attention, both wanted and unwanted. It's also why many men aren't getting any attention from these women, only the very top few are getting selected. so online dating won't work for most men...and as men learn this, they try to find other ways to meet women, that's where they will inevitably find things like PUA/Game, or just retreat into the land of porn, video games and drugs. Depression will follow as life loses meaning for many of these men.

As for the pussification of men in the millennial era (my generation), lower testosterone levels and sperm counts are part of the problem. It has been documented (see GQ link below), that sperm counts have been dropping every year since WW2, and kids born today have far less testosterone than their grandparents, and most healthy men in their 20s have the equivalent T levels as a 60 year old man. There is a fear that T levels will continue to drop at the current rate there will be point where men won't have enough testosterone to get an erection and impregnate women...and for those that can, their sperm counts will be too low for conception. This is called the ZERO SPERM level, where humanity will cease to exist (we will survive thanks to artificial inception). This is actually a very big problem, the causes are unknown, many link it to plastics and our sedentary modern environment.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/2019/03/29/share-americans-not-having-sex-has-reached-record-high/?noredirect=on&utm_term=.278c969f972b

What Happens If We Hit Sperm Count Zero?

A strange thing has happened to men over the past few decades: We've become increasingly infertile, so much so that within a generation we may lose the ability to reproduce entirely.

www.gq.com

Well written post. I agree with you on many points. I am just over 30 and belong to the “older millennials”. Online Porn is a real problem.

I just disagree on the timing of events. I do not think people fail in online dating and then hence they seek pua for help. These are events of two different era.

PUA really get hyped up in the year 2000s after neil strauss wrote a book about the game in 2005. It boomed in 2007-2012 but slowly declined.

The social media dating and instalgram attention seeking game to me was more of a post 2012 era thing. This is the time that people are more trusting of internet as a platform to not only use for communication and commerce but also looking for dates and sexual attention.

PUA material at its core is written based on experience of guys hitting on girls in the early 2000s. It was a different generation of girls. For the dating and sexual market game girls only have 8 years and after that they will retire into serious monogamy or forced to retire as they receive no attention. Thats the hard reality. So if you think about the girls getting hit on in 2002/2003 versus 2018-2019 they are two generations apart!

So back in the early 2000s internet is still at its infancy. Girls go to clubs and bars to get hit on by guys. PUA is not just about how to get girls but it come with a nerd jock struggle dynamic in the anglo-american culture. In the pre-internet dating era when most people still have the balls to communicate face to face, the outgoing confident guys who are more athletic were getting female attention. So the nerds come out with their own system to “decode” the success in the game. They turn social interactions into theories and practice and seriously train for it. That was the gist.

Fast forward to 2018-2019. The landscape was different. Everyone is a nerd now. The girls are nerds too. It is a different generation of girls. They don't go to pubs. If guys approach then in supermarket the girls will freak out because they do not get used to this. They rather post more glam shots on instal gram to seek male validations .

 

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[ChrisV]

And I can't speak for anyone else, but I'm a Data Scientist who works mainly in the Social Sciences, so understanding human nature is important to me.

 

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[ChrisV]

Lol. I've been lurking for a while on this forum and never posted, but had to make an account just to say that this is the cringiest thread I've read on this forum. Surprised it's gotten this long. For the young guys out there, listen to the business and financial advice on this forum but disregard the "dating/women" talk here, it's just the blind leading the blind as those succesful with dating really don't discuss/overanalyze dating this way. Just know that spending one night with a girl will teach you much more than reading about "dating advice" from "dating experts" on the internet will.

I don't even know what his guy is talking about. This isn't an advice thread. It's a "shut the f--- up with the PUA bullshit" Public Service Announcement since this cancer has been infiltrating the forums as of late. I don't do 'pickup' I don't care about 'pickup,' and thinking about yourself as 'successful with dating' is slimey in and of itself. Dating is not a f---ing 'skill.' It's about meeting and connecting with another human being. "Bro, I'm a master dater... I totally am the best dater you've ever seen. I'm really successful at dating." It's a nonsensical mentality.

The rest of the stuff is just to dispel myths from a research and psychology perspective.

I've been lurking for a while on this forum and never posted

And thank god for that.

Note to self: I really have to work on not responding to trolls. It's like my kryptonite. I said I was pretty much done with this thread a while ago, but I keep getting sucked back in with the email notifications. Definitely something I need to work on.

 

[Nikorasu]

@ChrisV no reply to my previous post? It seems you skipped over that one.. I’d love to hear your thoughts on the things I brought up...

Also dating is not a skill? That’s like saying throwing parties isn’t a skill. A date is basically a party of two.. So conversation, hosting, and flirting aren’t things you can improve on? What’s going on here?

 

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[Mattie]

“be yourself” advice that is VERY destructive.

Always worked for me. Seriously, always was like that for me. You're either a natural or not. I believe some people have to work harder for it than others. All about the way you speak number one, how you act, how you behave, and sure, you go through the growing pains, but if you're not authentic, you're just leading someone to believe you're something your not. They accept your for who you are, or they don't.

 

[guy93777]

This thread indicates a Real Problem: People don’t want to be alone.

i don't think so

i think that this topic really shows that men have become weak


and they don't really know how to manage women anymore


well explained here :


seduction is a fight between yin and yang energy

push and pull as explained here :




a woman is seduced when the yin ( female energy ) and yang ( male energy )have found the right harmony

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LVbGjIHN3A4








do you think a woman will be attracted by this :








or by this ?







i don't know. maybe the first picture is the right one. i am just asking

smart people know the answer.

 

[Kevin88660]

i don't think so

i think that this topic really shows that men have become weak


and they don't really know how to manage women anymore


well explained here :


seduction is a fight between yin and yang energy

push and pull as explained here :

View attachment 25753


a woman is seduced when the yin ( female energy ) and yang ( male energy )have found the right harmony

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LVbGjIHN3A4








do you think a woman will be attracted by this :


View attachment 25751





or by this ?


View attachment 25752




i don't know. maybe the first picture is the right one. i am just asking

smart people know the answer.

I guess that men prefer the gladiator but women prefer the first classy rich dude surrounded by chicks.

Men always do shits that women do not care.

 

[ChrisV]

Great talk on this: Good v. Evil, Light v. Dark Triad, PUAs & Red Pill: Morality in the Survival of the Fittest

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oy_gh6__EOQ