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INTRO We'll be fine (with some knowledge bombs)

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We ll be Fine

Contributor
Sep 1, 2019
3
26
16
This is for the young guys here.

5 years ago I was 19, posting on this forum semi-regularly. Recently, I looked back at my old posts after not visiting the site in years and started cringing so hard. I was so full of shit and trying so hard to pretend like I knew what I was talking about.

I'd like to consider this my re-introduction.

19-22

From 19-22 I went to a nearby college and commuted from home. I went to a school that wasn’t bad, but was considered much worse than what I could have gone to. I had friends with similar grades that ended up in Ivy’s. I know that people i went to high school with were talking behind my back asking why the hell I chose this route.

During my last 3 semesters I worked in shit sales jobs 20-30 hours per week in order to reach my goal of no student loan debt.

With my hard work, scholarships and the generosity of my parents I graduated with absolutely no debt.

In the end, I landed a better job than all of them. I work legitimately 40 hours a week while they all work 60+, and still make more than any of them. I get free lunch every day. I get free health insurance. But most importantly, I actually like my job and people I work with.

22-24

I’ve been working at this tech company doing sales for the past year and a half. I’ve been promoted twice in that time. I made about 90k with base and commission last year not including my benefits which would be around another 10k.

A few months after landing the job I moved to NYC.

It’s been a fun time and I live a good life.

I joined Equinox. I go out to eat whenever I want. I have a girlfriend and good friends. I buy whatever I want. Vacation? Done. $200 backpack? Done. Laundry service? Done.

By all means I should be happy, and I am, but still felt like something was missing.

I distinctly remember the feeling when I bought Hamlet tickets on Ticketmaster and resold them on Stubhub 5 years ago for what felt like a massive profit at the time. That’s what I missed.

About a month ago I ended up buying MJ’s new book which helped me remember who I am and who I want to be.

Now

I have about $30k saved up because I don’t touch my commission checks.

I am moving back home because I am having problems with my landlord. To most might seem like a setback, but I did not want to put myself in a position where I desperately needed a place to live and someone to live with. Long story short, I ended up having to pay both halves of rent for one month, which thankfully was not an issue because I had savings.

This will also give me a chance to spend time with my family. My grandma is getting old and I honestly just miss my mom and dad. Time should pass fairly quickly because the holidays are coming up and I’ll be taking another vacation soon.

Things I learned from work
  • Revenue.
    • Although SDRs and BDR’s are comped mostly on opportunities created or meetings scheduled, at the end of the day the only way you will only get promoted is if the opportunities you sourced turn into revenue. Sales is what matters.
  • The power of Inbound.
    • Having someone go on your website and ask to speak with a salesperson is the equivalent of a high school athlete being approached by colleges and offered scholarships to join the school, or a girl walking up to you and asking you out. People think it’s not scalable but it is, and it is just so much better for obvious reasons.
  • Outbound.
    • That being said, outbounding (cold calling and emailing) does work. You can’t be afraid to get on the phone and talk to people if you know that what you have to say is of value to them.
  • Power of a good product.
    • I’ve worked shit sales job where you were basically looking for the dumbest guy you could find because that’s the only person that would end up buying. You feel sleazy and dirty. Having a great product is the foundation of your business and makes the entire process easier. Don’t work for a company that sells crap.
  • Looks are deceiving.
    • Most executives are genuinely not good at their jobs. They just look the part or networked effectively. Don’t ever think they are better than you or smarter. They just have more experience.
  • Lead without leading.
    • This is part of Lao Tzu’s Tao Te Ching. Although I’m not a manager, I am the current team lead. Since they still haven’t hired a new manager after the previous one got promoted, I have been handling many of the responsibilities of a manager. And honestly, the team has been doing just fine if not better under my disgression. They keep producing day in and day out because we have the right systems in place. Just have to step in here and there, but other than that it’s just maintenance. If everyday you have to force people to do work, it will not last. Create an environment where good works comes automatically.
  • Power of “tech”.
    • Our company valuation although justified, is insane. Think about companies like Peloton, WeWork and even AMC with their app. None of these are actual “tech” companies but because they’ve found a way to implement tech into an old industry, they are valued astronomically higher.
Advice
  • There’s nothing wrong with a job if you enjoy it, you're learning, and you know it's not the end goal.
  • At this age, don’t commit to a girl, a job, a mortgage, or anything but yourself and your family. Give yourself options to explore and test things out.
  • Travel if you can. I went to London and Amsterdam this past winter. It was my first time outside of the US. I wouldn’t say it was life changing, but I loved it. It was more about me being out on my own, not knowing what the hell would happen, but know that I could handle any situation that came my way.
  • The most important investment you can make is in your health. I use to smoke weed every day multiple times a day. I got professional help, and although I do have fun every now and then, it’s no longer an issue. In the beginning it’s less about doing the right things and more about stopping all of the bad things holding you back.
  • Value your time. My biggest gripe about moving back home is the 1 hour commute compared to the 10 minutes it took to walk to work. It improved my health because I had less stress and more time to sleep and exercise. You can’t put a price on that. In addition, I use a laundry service instead of doing it myself. I fill up a bag, drop it off before work, pick it up afterwards and it's already folded and good to go. Takes less than 10 minutes compared to the hours I would have to spend doing it myself. For $25, I will gladly save 3-10 hours every month.
  • Read.
  • Meditate. Over the past 2.5 years I meditated every day. Then I recently signed up for TM (Transcendental Meditation) and realized that whatever I was doing wasn’t even meditation. I instantly switched over because of how profound the experience was and what it continues to be. I don’t know what to say except that this is the most life changing thing I’ve ever done. Without a doubt I will continue to do this the rest of my life.
  • Problems with my landlord. Everything needs to be in writing. You need to know the law and always have it on your side. Know what you can and can’t get away with. This is what my experienced landlord did to game the system. However, the most important thing I learned from him is to never end up acting like your “enemies” no matter how much they upset you. It’s not worth stooping down to their level to jeopardize your own dignity and character. Be respectful, but know you can’t blindly trust others when money is involved.
  • Lastly, family is all you really have. When push comes to shove, who is going to help you move on short notice? Who is going to help pay your hospital bills? Who will never move on if you happened to die tomorrow? For me, I know it’s my family. A kid I went to high school with recently died of a drug overdose. After a couple of weeks pretty much everyone including his girlfriend had forgotten and moved on but we all know this will haunt his parents for the rest of their lives.

Moving forward (Goals)

  • Get the promotion and raise to be the new SDR manager.
  • Travel as much as possible
  • Move back to the city after the New Year
  • Save up 50k
  • Build up a stronger network.
These are pretty vague at the time, I will make them more concrete after I have time to think it over.

Reading list

These are my favorite books I've read in no particular order. Just in the process of packing and moving. Happy to make recommendations.

27086

Conclusion

The reason for this post is to encourage other young adults knowing that just because you didn’t start a successful business at 19 year old doesn’t mean you should give up on your dreams. Think long term, keep making progress and follow your own path.

There’s more than one way to the top of the mountain.
 

Bekit

Platinum Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Summit Attendee
Speedway Pass
Aug 13, 2018
931
4,343
988
This is for the young guys here.

5 years ago I was 19, posting on this forum semi-regularly. Recently, I looked back at my old posts after not visiting the site in years and started cringing so hard. I was so full of shit and trying so hard to pretend like I knew what I was talking about.

I'd like to consider this my re-introduction.

19-22

From 19-22 I went to a nearby college and commuted from home. I went to a school that wasn’t bad, but was considered much worse than what I could have gone to. I had friends with similar grades that ended up in Ivy’s. I know that people i went to high school with were talking behind my back asking why the hell I chose this route.

During my last 3 semesters I worked in shit sales jobs 20-30 hours per week in order to reach my goal of no student loan debt.

With my hard work, scholarships and the generosity of my parents I graduated with absolutely no debt.

In the end, I landed a better job than all of them. I work legitimately 40 hours a week while they all work 60+, and still make more than any of them. I get free lunch every day. I get free health insurance. But most importantly, I actually like my job and people I work with.

22-24

I’ve been working at this tech company doing sales for the past year and a half. I’ve been promoted twice in that time. I made about 90k with base and commission last year not including my benefits which would be around another 10k.

A few months after landing the job I moved to NYC.

It’s been a fun time and I live a good life.

I joined Equinox. I go out to eat whenever I want. I have a girlfriend and good friends. I buy whatever I want. Vacation? Done. $200 backpack? Done. Laundry service? Done.

By all means I should be happy, and I am, but still felt like something was missing.

I distinctly remember the feeling when I bought Hamlet tickets on Ticketmaster and resold them on Stubhub 5 years ago for what felt like a massive profit at the time. That’s what I missed.

About a month ago I ended up buying MJ’s new book which helped me remember who I am and who I want to be.

Now

I have about $30k saved up because I don’t touch my commission checks.

I am moving back home because I am having problems with my landlord. To most might seem like a setback, but I did not want to put myself in a position where I desperately needed a place to live and someone to live with. Long story short, I ended up having to pay both halves of rent for one month, which thankfully was not an issue because I had savings.

This will also give me a chance to spend time with my family. My grandma is getting old and I honestly just miss my mom and dad. Time should pass fairly quickly because the holidays are coming up and I’ll be taking another vacation soon.

Things I learned from work
  • Revenue.
    • Although SDRs and BDR’s are comped mostly on opportunities created or meetings scheduled, at the end of the day the only way you will only get promoted is if the opportunities you sourced turn into revenue. Sales is what matters.
  • The power of Inbound.
    • Having someone go on your website and ask to speak with a salesperson is the equivalent of a high school athlete being approached by colleges and offered scholarships to join the school, or a girl walking up to you and asking you out. People think it’s not scalable but it is, and it is just so much better for obvious reasons.
  • Outbound.
    • That being said, outbounding (cold calling and emailing) does work. You can’t be afraid to get on the phone and talk to people if you know that what you have to say is of value to them.
  • Power of a good product.
    • I’ve worked shit sales job where you were basically looking for the dumbest guy you could find because that’s the only person that would end up buying. You feel sleazy and dirty. Having a great product is the foundation of your business and makes the entire process easier. Don’t work for a company that sells crap.
  • Looks are deceiving.
    • Most executives are genuinely not good at their jobs. They just look the part or networked effectively. Don’t ever think they are better than you or smarter. They just have more experience.
  • Lead without leading.
    • This is part of Lao Tzu’s Tao Te Ching. Although I’m not a manager, I am the current team lead. Since they still haven’t hired a new manager after the previous one got promoted, I have been handling many of the responsibilities of a manager. And honestly, the team has been doing just fine if not better under my disgression. They keep producing day in and day out because we have the right systems in place. Just have to step in here and there, but other than that it’s just maintenance. If everyday you have to force people to do work, it will not last. Create an environment where good works comes automatically.
  • Power of “tech”.
    • Our company valuation although justified, is insane. Think about companies like Peloton, WeWork and even AMC with their app. None of these are actual “tech” companies but because they’ve found a way to implement tech into an old industry, they are valued astronomically higher.
Advice
  • There’s nothing wrong with a job if you enjoy it, you're learning, and you know it's not the end goal.
  • At this age, don’t commit to a girl, a job, a mortgage, or anything but yourself and your family. Give yourself options to explore and test things out.
  • Travel if you can. I went to London and Amsterdam this past winter. It was my first time outside of the US. I wouldn’t say it was life changing, but I loved it. It was more about me being out on my own, not knowing what the hell would happen, but know that I could handle any situation that came my way.
  • The most important investment you can make is in your health. I use to smoke weed every day multiple times a day. I got professional help, and although I do have fun every now and then, it’s no longer an issue. In the beginning it’s less about doing the right things and more about stopping all of the bad things holding you back.
  • Value your time. My biggest gripe about moving back home is the 1 hour commute compared to the 10 minutes it took to walk to work. It improved my health because I had less stress and more time to sleep and exercise. You can’t put a price on that. In addition, I use a laundry service instead of doing it myself. I fill up a bag, drop it off before work, pick it up afterwards and it's already folded and good to go. Takes less than 10 minutes compared to the hours I would have to spend doing it myself. For $25, I will gladly save 3-10 hours every month.
  • Read.
  • Meditate. Over the past 2.5 years I meditated every day. Then I recently signed up for TM (Transcendental Meditation) and realized that whatever I was doing wasn’t even meditation. I instantly switched over because of how profound the experience was and what it continues to be. I don’t know what to say except that this is the most life changing thing I’ve ever done. Without a doubt I will continue to do this the rest of my life.
  • Problems with my landlord. Everything needs to be in writing. You need to know the law and always have it on your side. Know what you can and can’t get away with. This is what my experienced landlord did to game the system. However, the most important thing I learned from him is to never end up acting like your “enemies” no matter how much they upset you. It’s not worth stooping down to their level to jeopardize your own dignity and character. Be respectful, but know you can’t blindly trust others when money is involved.
  • Lastly, family is all you really have. When push comes to shove, who is going to help you move on short notice? Who is going to help pay your hospital bills? Who will never move on if you happened to die tomorrow? For me, I know it’s my family. A kid I went to high school with recently died of a drug overdose. After a couple of weeks pretty much everyone including his girlfriend had forgotten and moved on but we all know this will haunt his parents for the rest of their lives.

Moving forward (Goals)

  • Get the promotion and raise to be the new SDR manager.
  • Travel as much as possible
  • Move back to the city after the New Year
  • Save up 50k
  • Build up a stronger network.
These are pretty vague at the time, I will make them more concrete after I have time to think it over.

Reading list

These are my favorite books I've read in no particular order. Just in the process of packing and moving. Happy to make recommendations.

View attachment 27086

Conclusion

The reason for this post is to encourage other young adults knowing that just because you didn’t start a successful business at 19 year old doesn’t mean you should give up on your dreams. Think long term, keep making progress and follow your own path.

There’s more than one way to the top of the mountain.
Welcome back to the forum, and thank you for the re-introduction.

Those were some GOLD knowledge bombs you dropped.

I look forward to hearing from you more often.
 

MoneyHacker

Bronze Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Dec 5, 2018
129
126
78
Somewhere in Asia
Your advices are amazing to me. And could you recommend some books about sale for a noob like me? I'm currently interested in this area. Thank you. Best wish and good luck to you on your next journey.
 

We ll be Fine

Contributor
Sep 1, 2019
3
26
16
Thank you for your reminder.
Entrepreneurship is not the only way to build wealth. But certainly one of the most exciting !

I plan on starting my own company after I turn 25. It just feels that people on this forum put so much pressure to start a company immediately after reading TMFL that they end up starting crap "businesses" just so they can call themselves an entrepreneur.

The reality is, most 18-22 year olds are not in any position to start a business. At this stage you simply don't know enough about life or faced the real struggle of going to work for someone else everyday and not depending on your parents.

Some might say that's just a mental block which is true to an extent since there are plenty examples of young people starting businesses. But I'd say these people are more of an exception.

Give yourself some time to grow up.

This does not mean don't try and experiment. It just means don't give up just because it's not working at this stage of your life.

Welcome back to the forum, and thank you for the re-introduction.

Those were some GOLD knowledge bombs you dropped.

I look forward to hearing from you more often.

Thank you. Not sure how often I will post, but will definitely stick around.

Your advices are amazing to me. And could you recommend some books about sale for a noob like me? I'm currently interested in this area. Thank you. Best wish and good luck to you on your next journey.

My favorite sales book is SPIN Selling. It focuses on asking the right questions in the right order (listening) to help guide your buyer to the logical conclusion of purchasing your product. It's a much less pushy and aggressive sales methodology, and more consultative.

The Challenger Sale is often recommended as well, but I think the whole book could be summarized in a few sentences. It comes down to knowing your product, industry, and the problems your buyer is facing so that you can "challenge" their preconceived notions of how their business operates. Get them thinking about their problems differently and show that you're an expert.

The best salespeople I know do a combination of SPIN selling and challenging.

As an example, let's say my car smells funny. Not knowing anything, I come to the conclusion that something must be wrong with the oil in my car. I go to a mechanic and he starts asking me questions. Does it always smell all the time or is it just when the car is running? Is it when the AC is on or is it all the time? He then looks at me like an idiot and says "bro you just need a new air filter". He knows the right questions to ask, but also knows enough about cars to challenge my preconceived notion that I need an oil change.

Fanatical Prospecting is good because it highlights the importance of building a strong pipeline. Most sales gurus focus on "closing" because it's glamorous and exciting. But really the tough and most important part is doing the grinding to make sure your pipeline is filled so you're never praying on that one deal to close to make or break your quarter.

In the end, really the best way to learn sales is to get a sales job. No book will teach you how to overcome the anxiety of picking up the phone and calling a complete stranger. We've all been cold called before and get pissed when someone interrupts our day. Try being on the other side of that conversation.

Edit: You can never go wrong with How to Win Friends and Influence People. It is usually the first self-improvement book anyone reads. It isn't specific to "sales" but is the foundation of having healthy relationships.
 

MJ DeMarco

Administrator
Staff member
EPIC CONTRIBUTOR
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Summit Attendee
Speedway Pass
Jul 23, 2007
32,491
123,752
3,751
Fountain Hills, AZ
Some great knowledge drops, thanks for sharing! Retitled for more eyeballs.

There’s nothing wrong with a job if you enjoy it, you're learning, and you know it's not the end goal.

+1 ... a job is not the end of the world!

Great to have ya back!
 

We ll be Fine

Contributor
Sep 1, 2019
3
26
16
Crazy it's been 3 years since I originally wrote this.

24-26
  • When I last posted, I was ready to move back home because I wasn’t in love with NYC. This happened to be 4 months before C0VlD hit, which turned out to be great timing. Many friends signed new leases right before C0VlD, so they were stuck paying for an apartment they didn’t even live in since they went back to the suburbs as well. Family life was good but boring at times. However, I’m truly blessed to be able to spend that extra time with my mom, dad and grandma - eating meals together since we all WFH, playing golf and tennis. I don’t know much but I know I’ll cherish those memories and never regret one last stay at home while they were all still healthy.
  • Broke up with my girlfriend. Beautiful girl, but just not the right fit. Sometimes you just have to cut loose.
  • Left my old position during C0VlD and now work for a great and more reputable software company many of you have heard of. My base is $70k + 25-45k in commissions. I love my company and boss, but I don't love my role. The boredom is one of the reasons I felt compelled to write today.
  • Also recently moved to a new city far away from home. Although I lived in NYC briefly, it was still within an hour from my parents and extended family so I saw them quite often. This is the first time being truly alone (somewhat similar to MJ moving to Arizona)
  • Marijuana is legal in this city and although it was manageable at first, it's beginning to be a problem again. I'm bringing this up because 1. It's true. I'm writing this out for me. I can't just keep denying it or pretending it's not an issue. 2. There are for sure others out there that believe weed (alcohol, jerking off, etc) is fine or good for you. And for most people it is, but if it's not then you need to do something about it. In the beginning it's not about doing the right things, it's about not doing the wrong things.
  • The new city itself is great. I actually love it. I have 1 good friend here who has introduced me to his whole social circle. NYC is great if you love food and alcohol (and have money), but if you’re outdoorsy then it’s not ideal. I do feel like I’ve found a new home.
  • My biggest concern has been women and dating. The culture is different here so many my age are already married. Dating apps are okay. I’ve gotten laid a few times, been on a number of dates in just the few months I’ve been here but these are definitely not women I’d ever consider settling down with. This brings me back to why I read books like TMFL to begin with. Self improvement to lead to a better more fulfilling life.
 (Will take any suggestions on where to meet women in person and not through apps. Currently waiting for my yoga mat to arrive so I can do Corepower yoga.)
  • I now have a net worth of $100k at 26 which isn’t too shabby.
  • Finally feel good and consistent at my favorite hobbies, golf and tennis, which is super important to me.
  • Still meditate.
  • I guess what compelled me to write today is to reflect on what’s happened but also because I don’t know where to go from here. On paper things are great but something is missing. Mostly work and a significant other. And I know deep down that real work is what will challenge me to grow as a person and then lead to better opportunities and people so I can meet the right woman. Yet I’m at a crossroads. Lead a normal “good enough” life and settle. Or don’t. Sober up. Really work. Really see where I can go. Really f*cking go for it. 

  • So where do we go from here? Step 1 is definitely sobering up. Substance abuse has consistently been the #1 issue holding me back for my entire life. I don't even drink caffeine anymore. I've also never had a "problem" with alcohol but it definitely has a negative effect on me for at least the day after. Marijuana though is a problem and is being dealt with now. From there I plan on sticking it out for a year at this role and using this time to try new hobbies, start small projects and get use to the new city.
  • But this is the tipping point. I use to tell myself that now isn't the best time and I'm not ready or mature enough to take the leap. After these 3 years we've made a ton of progress and we're finally reaching that point where you either take the leap or never do it and regret it for the rest of your life.
We'll be fine!
  • Lastly, I read a lot less now but these are some books I recommend since last time:
    • Flow
    • So Good They Can't Ignore You
    • Peak
    • You Can Choose To be Happy
    • WOOP goal setting (not a book)
    • The Hobbit (Classic adventure and hero's journey story. Shows the ups and downs of taking a risk, working with others, not knowing what will happen next, etc)
 

Silverfox148

Bronze Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Speedway Pass
Apr 17, 2017
92
256
167
Interesting series of posts:

1. Family really is everything, especially parents and extended family who saw you grow up and invested in you, unfortunately wifes/children/friends/girlfriends/etc. They can and will move on after you have passed away/divorce/other issues. Don't get upset at this, it's just the way the world works and it's nothing personal, people move on, the world keeps spinning.

I get how you feel and what you are experiencing at the moment. I'm 34 about to be 35 next month and have a net worth nearing 1 million dollars at this point on paper(401K, Home, Agricultural Property, etc). I have a great high paying job and a good family with a good wife and 3 kids, but I have "topped out" dreams/goals wise, in other words I have met all possible/workable goals/dreams I had as a kid. I'm not a big money guy beyond what the money can provide for me(time freedom). You sound like an internally motivated type person such as myself which is great as long as the motivation is there, but very difficult when it is not, because then you can't rely on external motivation.

I think you need to sit down and be truly honest with yourself about where you need to go next with your life. If you want to find a quality girl and start a family it's going to be difficult in the United States but not impossible as some claim, also you need to be fine with the fact it could blow up in your face, only start a family if you are 100% sure it is what you want, because it is very very tricky at the moment. Don't rely on finding these women on dating apps, that's usually not a good sign.
 

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