JAJT
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how I still owe her money.
I know everyone has their own strong opinions on this, and this is PURELY my own, but this strikes me as a real serious "red flag" in a relationship.
In my humble opinion:
- Strangers owe each other money.
- Friends owe each other money.
- Family owe each other money.
To me, spouses should not owe each other money.
It sends a very strong message of inequality and division between you. You aren't equals trying to take on life together - you are a debtor to your spouse who expects to be made whole by you. That just doesn't sit well with me.
How can you be equals in a relationship when one feels in debt to the other?
When one feels owed by the other?
How can you build a life together on the foundation of "what's yours is yours and what's mine is mine"?
Maybe this comment was inappropriate. I don't know you or your life or your situation. Maybe this is normal in other cultures and I'm just not familiar with it. I'm just a stranger on the internet with my own ideas of things. But to me this small comment you made was the weirdest, most telling part of your entire post.
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