The importance of selecting the right friends

[chrisbiz4444]

I was reading an article on addicted2success and it really opened my eyes. We have all been told the importance of hanging with the right people but do we actually act on this knowledge ? A great example is the doctor that eats the bulk of his meals at McDonalds. After taking a step back and really looking at my own life and who is in my circle I can see that 90% of the people I put myself around are not going down the path I am in life. They have very little ambition. Most have very bad work ethic. They have bad habits and worst of all they don't even want to be helped. It is like these people don't even care. ( And there is nothing wrong with that. Some people are happy living an average simplistic life. More power to them). But If you are anything like me, you aspire to live an extraordinary life and become the best person you can possibly become. I feel like "Fastlane self growth" Starts with surrounding yourself with extraordinary people. It gives you a higher standard to live up too and that forces you to grow as a person.

While I know it can be extremely difficult sometimes to find these people in real life ( Your hometown) I feel it is worth it the effort. Just this one simple step can open the doorway to many new opportunity's and expand your horizons exponentially. I know first hand. I met a real estate millionaire that opened my eyes to many new business ideas and concepts that I would have never known otherwise. And that was just a couple conversations with this man. This is powerful stuff !

My advice is not to break friendships. Try to help your long time friends if possible. My advice is to simply take a step back and make sure you put yourself around people that are going to push you forward not backwards.

I provided a link to the page that I am referring to below. I hope this helps someone else here as it has helped me take a step back and take a look.

http://addicted2success.com/success-advice/why-successful-people-leave-their-loser-friends-behind/

 

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[DeletedUser2]

You might find those friendships break on their own accord.

It's just a natural progression

Z

 

[Worldisyours]

You naturally attract and go towards who you are.

I seen it with many people. Shady always ends up with shady. Sleezy always ends up with sleezy

you dont need friends in business anyways, just associates

 

[Windsurfer]

I just talked to a buddy who was my copilot in the Air Force 20+ years ago. He is now a Colonel and a Wing Commander. He is thinking of leaving the Air Force and does not know what to do. He will get a decent retirement and is thinking of flying for the airlines. I sent him "The Four Hour Work Week" saying there are better things than that (I thought I would ease him into Fastlane thinking).

I got crickets.

I don't think there are a lot of people who 'get it' out there. The conversations just get more and more awkward.

 

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[chrisbiz4444]

I just talked to a buddy who was my copilot in the Air Force 20+ years ago. He is now a Colonel and a Wing Commander. He is thinking of leaving the Air Force and does not know what to do. He will get a decent retirement and is thinking of flying for the airlines. I sent him "The Four Hour Work Week" saying there are better things than that (I thought I would ease him into Fastlane thinking).

I got crickets.

I don't think there are a lot of people who 'get it' out there. The conversations just get more and more awkward.

I know how that goes lol!

 

[Elizabeth Shi]

For me maintaining a good business relationship and maintaining life long bonds are of equal importance. Though I barely get to see my friends anymore

 

[Jak]

I hope this helps someone else here as it has helped me take a step back and take a look.

I found this very helpful, thank you. I've heard the adage that "you are the average of the five closest people you surround yourself with", and I have had to end some negative relationships (one of them I considered my best friend, but he was dragging me down more than anyone else). It's not an easy thing to do, but I have already found new friends that are better for me.

That being said, I still found the article very useful and have already started my list. Thanks for the link!

 

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[beatgoezon]

Appreciate the share ChrisBiz. It's hard to accept but totally true.

From my personal experience, it hurts to let old friendships go for only about a day, after that you start feeling more clear, more free from the toxcicity of the negative friendship.

It's better to let these types of relationships go than to hold onto them and suffer long-term medicority.

 

[SteveO]

I have friends from this forum. I also have friends from my running group and from my multiple softball teams.

My wife and I live a very active life filled with activities. Golf, softball, running, parties, family, work... It is constant non-stop. We enjoy this even though it is hard to get a break.

I don't care what their thoughts on money are. Most of them drink a lot but I don't care. We share something in common with our activities and I enjoy being around them. We all care about each other and support each other in many ways. I don't talk to them about money unless they ask, which is rare.

I still enjoy meeting up with people from this forum. It is nice to feel free to talk about the crazy financial things that most people don't understand.

I don't care about my friend's financials or their attitude about money. I do care that we share something in common.

 

[TommyBoy]

I totally agree with this and it is far difficult considering everyone is "subconciously" lazy to take the easy route. I recently signed-up for Maneesh's Hack the Habit group, which is a private facebook group to have mentors and people to keep you accountable for your daily goals. Well guess what, after a week of activity in that group, it suddenly died down. Without a consistent leader and motivation people stray away. People don't see much value in other people trying the same thing you are doing, so they only seek out the superiors or people with the completed accomplishments.

 

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[chrisbiz4444]

I found this very helpful, thank you. I've heard the adage that "you are the average of the five closest people you surround yourself with", and I have had to end some negative relationships (one of them I considered my best friend, but he was dragging me down more than anyone else). It's not an easy thing to do, but I have already found new friends that are better for me.

That being said, I still found the article very useful and have already started my list. Thanks for the link!

Went through the same thing. You gotta do what you gotta do to make your life the life you want. At the end of the day some people just don't fit into the puzzle.

 

[Nadia]

I was reading an article on addicted2success and it really opened my eyes. We have all been told the importance of hanging with the right people but do we actually act on this knowledge ? A great example is the doctor that eats the bulk of his meals at McDonalds. After taking a step back and really looking at my own life and who is in my circle I can see that 90% of the people I put myself around are not going down the path I am in life. They have very little ambition. Most have very bad work ethic. They have bad habits and worst of all they don't even want to be helped. It is like these people don't even care. ( And there is nothing wrong with that. Some people are happy living an average simplistic life. More power to them). But If you are anything like me, you aspire to live an extraordinary life and become the best person you can possibly become. I feel like "Fastlane self growth" Starts with surrounding yourself with extraordinary people. It gives you a higher standard to live up too and that forces you to grow as a person.

While I know it can be extremely difficult sometimes to find these people in real life ( Your hometown) I feel it is worth it the effort. Just this one simple step can open the doorway to many new opportunity's and expand your horizons exponentially. I know first hand. I met a real estate millionaire that opened my eyes to many new business ideas and concepts that I would have never known otherwise. And that was just a couple conversations with this man. This is powerful stuff !

My advice is not to break friendships. Try to help your long time friends if possible. My advice is to simply take a step back and make sure you put yourself around people that are going to push you forward not backwards.

I provided a link to the page that I am referring to below. I hope this helps someone else here as it has helped me take a step back and take a look.

http://addicted2success.com/success-advice/why-successful-people-leave-their-loser-friends-behind/

People are SUPER uncomfortable leaving their loser friends behind. This is something I became very accustomed to. I cut this girl I used to clal my best friend out of my life, cold turkey. Stop answering the phone, her texts etc. She still tries.

She was sucking the life out of me and doing nothing with hers. Goodbye.
If someone is doing nothing with theirs, you ain't around me. Period.

 

[SteveO]

It seems to me that I am out of alignment with most people here on the forum when it comes to social issues. There are so many items that people can share in common that don't relate to money:

Parties
Sewing
Golf
Crafts
Sex
Softball
gardening
and the list can go on...

This is not the only topic that I seem to have a difference on. Perhaps I can't hang out with you folks after all.

 

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[Lathan]

It seems to me that I am out of alignment with most people here on the forum when it comes to social issues. There are so many items that people can share in common that don't relate to money:

Yea I don't see the harm in hanging out with people who aren't exactly financially savvy or whatever.

The only time I think it may be a bad idea is if you're a person who let's others influence you very easily and it causes you to lose track of your own goals in life.

With that said, I do think it's a great idea to surround yourself with successes minded people and not those who are going to drain the life out of you with their slowlane beliefs and negative attitudes. But once again, as far as just hanging out with some people who may not share your financial goals but they bring SOME kind of happiness to your life... nothing wrong with that at all.

This is not the only topic that I seem to have a difference on

Care to share? If not, it's cool

 

[SteveO]

@Lathan . You know I was just joking about the hanging out thing, right? It is just difficult to surround yourself with people that think like you do financially in everyday life. I was trying to make a joke that was obviously not that funny.

 

[Lathan]

Perhaps I can't hang out with you folks after all

You mean about this part? Yes I knew you were joking. Lol

It seems to me that I am out of alignment with most people here on the forum when it comes to social issues. There are so many items that people can share in common that don't relate to money:

If you were joking about this, then yea, it went right over my head.

 

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[SteveO]

If you were joking about this, then yea, it went right over my head.

That part is accurate, but that is okay. There is no reason that we all need to think alike! What a boring world we would have if that were the case.

 

[chrisbiz4444]

People are SUPER uncomfortable leaving their loser friends behind. This is something I became very accustomed to. I cut this girl I used to clal my best friend out of my life, cold turkey. Stop answering the phone, her texts etc. She still tries.

She was sucking the life out of me and doing nothing with hers. Goodbye.
If someone is doing nothing with theirs, you ain't around me. Period.

I went through a similar situation. I think your 1000% right.

The people that come into your life are either blessings or lessons.

Winners hang with winners. Personality types usually flock together. An A-type personality usually wont have much in common with someone who don't care about anything. There is nothing wrong with that. However If someone is losing and they truly want to change their life I am all about lifting people up and helping them out. It is just the negative people that sit around complaining. You know, the ones with no drive or passion for anything that make for a bad network.

 

[Leo Hendrix]

Thanks for the reminder...I am trying to get out more...recently moved to another country...it is quite hard to the nature of my main activity...tertiary study...but I am trying and will keep making connections...Although I fully agree..when I am with and around go-getters my true higher self comes out...just having issues making small talk...and need to work on listening again more

 

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