Saved up 3 thousand dollars and I don't want to make a mistake. Looking for advice.

[flower_girl]

Lots of good advice above so I'd just like to second the recommendations to spend some money on clothes. Looking and feeling well groomed is a great confidence boost so I think it's good bang for the buck - most countries you can get some excellent clothes quite cheaply so I'd go for it. Best wishes to you, well done in saving the $3000!

 

[ChrisV]

Our ‘own two eyes’ are among the biggest liars in history.

And I mean that. It’s why Anecdotal evidence is completely worthless.

 

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[A_Random_Guy]

It’s a mainstream lie and I’ve found that the people who believe it most don’t have any idea themselves they just get it from popular culture.

So you're telling me I can't shitpost on r/niceguys anymore yelling how girls only run after bad boys and rich studs while ignoring us "nice" guys(who won't do anything else all day but wag their tail after every girl they meet online, keep listening to how tough these girls have it in life, sympathize and repeat)?
I feel my job is threatened Oh no! What do I do now?

 

[bibbysoka]

You do you. I’ll trust what I see with my own two eyes.

You remind me of the stereotypical douchey, highschool bully

 

[Kevin88660]

I'm 19. Been working during the summer. I have saved up about 3 thousand dollars. However, I've very tempted to spend half of that on a shitty car, another 5 hundred dollars on some clothing (since I have absolutely no wardrobe), and the other thousand on other things I want (such as getting a photoshoot done for my social media, a video camera so that I can start documenting my journey...).
Basically my confidence is down. I don't have decent clothing, I don't have a car, I look like shit, I have a shitty romantic and social life.

At the same time, I'm looking at things in the long run. Perhaps it's best to just keep saving and to spend this money on business ideas to eventually make even more money. Maybe I should just say F*UCK YOU to my confidence for a few more years until I have solid passive income coming my way.

What do y'all think?

I do not think your current mindset is good to start a business. Basically you think the same way as I do. We need instant validation on the hard work and effort we put in.

Doing business is a painful and lonely process. Judging from what really matters to you now, you are likely to go depressed before you succeed in a business. Just think about it. Your social like sucks now. Wait until you get your friends and parents pressuring you to get a proper job while you have no cash coming into your business. It will break you.

I am in financial sales and I recommend you going to sales. Faster money and less pressure on you. You will have time and resources to impress your friends and girls.

You are only 19 and you worried about not having money and a good social life? Hahahah. When I was 19 I still live off on my parents. Come on you are doing well. There are plenty of people who have nothing in their 30s and 40s.

 

[MitchC]

Furthermore, having money boosts your confidence. When you're broke you worry constantly about tomorrow, and it's really hard to be that 'cool fun guy' when your survival is literally at risk.

He's 19, this is very different. Having nice clothes, a car and being popular or at least popular enough to go out and meet girls is all that matters. Yeah if you're rich that helps too but he's 19, being rich at that age means having rich parents which you can't change. Yeah he could get rich on his own but that means hard work for years which in my opinion is a waste of being 19. Let's say he did it in 2 years, now he's 21, he's already missed so much. Girls don't expect you to be rich at 19, if being serious is on their mind all they'll look at is your potential, your motivation and drive and goals which having them boosts confidence and makes you attractive. If you get into a good school etc.

As you've said above boosting confidence is huge, all you need to do that at 19 is some nice clothes, go to the gym and maybe a car. The rest is just the confidence you get from meeting girls and them liking you.

My advice to the OP is if you're going to do video, start with a used iPhone 7 if you don't already own a better phone, if its going well, buy a mic, if its really going well buy a camera like a G7X or G85. You won't really know what you'll need or want till you start and the gear can get expensive fast. You might find you need a new computer before you need a camera.

A photoshoot for tinder is just weird. Post pictures of you doing fun stuff in groups of friends especially ones that have girls in them so they know you aren't weird, maybe some travel pictures, so maybe spend some of that money travelling really cheaply. You could travel and do some touristy stuff locally or within your country or go to a country like Bali and stay in hostels for 2-3 weeks, you'll meet so many people, have so many stories and get so many pictures you can use. Plus you can make videos of it. I'm not sure what flights would cost you but staying there a hostel is like $10 a night max, and a meal is usually under $5.

It sounds like you won't need the car soon but if you really do then just spend enough to get something reliable, cars especially cheap ones are expensive to own. You're better off just paying your mates gas money if you're going out. But if you do need a car, get the most reliable one you can.

Clothes, just buy nice ones that fit well, you don't need big logos or brands. And as someone mentioned above, buy them slowly so you can get a feel for what you like, what you need, what you actually wear, what you feel most confident wearing and what gets you compliments and attention.

Best case scenario, you get some nice clothes over time for $300, do some cool things locally over time and get some good tinder pics and make friends for about $300-500 and make some videos on the phone you already have while you're at it, or spend a couple 100 on a used iPhone. Then you have about $2000 left for a decent car but if you don't need it then you have $2000 to make you feel comfortable and start flipping items off craigslist with and also to pay people gas money and uber.

 

[Soder]

Your confidence, your ideas and your finances will not improve with stupid purchases, in fact they will get worse. The only thing you can buy that increases your confidence are books and the monthly payment of a gym.

 

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[TheCj]

Your sure sound familiar to me at 19.


A few points:

1. What does the new car accomplish? Do you need it for better job opportunities? I can afford a very fancy car, yet I still drive the one from when I was dead broke. No one judges me for it other than saying "Wow you're good at finding deals. Those motors never die."


2. Some jeans and black/dark t-shirts will look fine.

Just focus on having clean well fitting clothes and good hygiene. Be the assertive guy that takes action towards his desires. Take care of yourself instead of pandering to others. That is more valuable to women than trying to impress them.

3. Don't do things to impress women. It is the same as value cheating. Any decent women will smell it a mile off. They are more advanced socially than most young men.

4. You could even get a used camera with a stand. Get good at taking well-lit and positioned photos and you can be the one with a lucrative side hustle. You can also use it to flip things on Craigslist.


Solution:
Get a second job/hustle where you sell things to the public. Use a car to spread your job options out further. Go to the gym and keep good hygiene. Don't worry about rejection and failure. Focus on moving forward and testing each new thesis and its opposite.

The levels go kind of like this:

• 1. Shit Job - (dish washer, landscaping, roofing, retail etc.) Builds character and humility. Will drive you for bettering yourself.
• 2. Sales Job - You keep the other job while having no risk in this commission based job. You get lots of business experience in making deals and helping customers relieve their frustration.
• 3. Side Hustle - Market your skills on your own. You know how to close, now you need to learn how to bring in the business.
• 4. Business related to a gap in job or side hustle industries. - You've learned the industry from an INSIDERS POV. Now you are using your skills and insights to build a system that attracts and dispenses value.

Don't be the guy who blows money and pea cocks trying to impress women. Put yourself in a position where you can keep taking smart risks while incrementally moving forward. Each step will compound the rest and you'll look back at how you used to be.

PS: Read the sections about hyper reality in Unscripted . You will become much more confident since you are one of the few who aren't playing in a rigged consumerist game.

Agree with all of the above!

If you are a natural at talking you will have way more success meeting women face to face than on an online app.
No one is talking about the ongoing costs of the car that will eat through money. Depending where you are insurance could be crazy expensive for a 19yr old male.

 

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[socaldude]

$3k is not enough to try to impress women if you wanna go that route. It's better to just be fun, relaxed and nice. No money is needed, that's called prostitution.

Your goal should be how you can convert those $3k into an income.

It's starts with knowing how to think first. Look into some resources on awareness and consciousness.

Thats where successful business thinking comes from. You have to know how to extend your awareness to things or variables that most are unaware of. Economics is about scarcity. There is nothing more scarce than human awareness.

 

[TheProcess]

Getting a professional shot for Tinder is not weird. The question is about affordability and whether you should spend your time on tinder instead of making money. My guy instinct is not now.

But eventually when you decide to have a Tinder account, go to the gym to get bulk up and then hire a professional photographer. Go for the kill. Nothing good comes out “naturally”. Unless you just want to be the 90 percent of the boys who like every girls they see but receives no reply. And then they give up and complain about girls being superficial.

Ended up getting it for free haha.

 

[BlokeInProgress]

So just a question, are you doing all this to impress a girl? Say you did impress a couple and started dating, will you be able to sustain this lifestyle or will you end up as a impostor?

Spend this money on business ideas to eventually make even more money.

- NOW THIS!!! Confidence builds up when you start learning and getting experience. Still it all comes up to what's your current goal right now. IS IT GETTING LAID OR GETTING PAID?!!!

 

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[TheProcess]

Go to the gym and make it a heavy focus in your life. Get some nice clothes and look sharp. Spend time getting better with women and become the guy people know as a player. Your confidence will be through the roof.

Then go kill it in business.

Confidence should come first. You’ll be an unhappy person without a kickass life if you think it will come to you after you’ve made money. A kickass life + money is awesome though if you’re a badass person without the money.

Thanks man, this is exactly what I was thinking. I'm my most productive when I look and feel sharp. Lifting has already been a big focus in my life. I'm gonna keep at it with that.

 

[TheProcess]

GOLD! - Sorry, But MJ (or the forum) Can't Make Your Life Decisions For You!!

I'm starting to receive a lot of emails, and even messages on this forum that request advice on major, life-changing decisions ... as if, I, and the forum, holds some type of crystal ball that knows the right decision for your life, your family, and your happiness. Do I quit my job? Do I move...

www.thefastlaneforum.com

However, let's break down your budget a little bit.

Car: I'm guessing you need this. Instead of going for some POS $500 beater that will be in and out of the shop every other month, look for historically reliable vehicles (Toyotas, Hondas) that are easy to maintain but have cosmetic issues like hail damage.

Clothes: Don't drop $500 all at once on clothing, especially when you don't already have an established wardrobe. If you're trying to upgrade your clothing, go slow with it. Start with the basics: a pair of jeans or chinos and a shirt or two. Go on /r/malefashionadvice for more information on looking better.

Again, don't drop $500 on a new wardrobe. Nice doesn't have to be expensive. If you hit the gym you can pull off jeans and a v-neck.

Photoshoot: No. If you feel like this will boost your confidence, find an amateur or a friend and slide them a $20 for their time.

I'm not telling you to not spend your money, but if you're strapped for cash do it logically and not emotionally.

And universal advice: delete Facebook, hit the gym, lawyer up.

Thanks man. I fully agree with your advice. The photoshoot is 150 bucks so probably too much.

 

[TheProcess]

Honey,

I truly believe looking good on tinder for "girls" is a bad investment. First you make money, then you don't even need to look for girls, because they will come to you. Also something else that I have learnt from the movie Scarface when I was a kid: "if you love women more than money, you will not succeed". I don't remember what Tony said exactly, but it was something like that.
H**s can wait. you focus on you

yea I fully agree. Just looking for some experience that's it. It's hard to focus on other things when that's on your mind a lot. I agree on the whole focus on you first, though.

 

[Elsa]

"In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the woman."

and there is another scene, in Tony's office, where he tells Manolo:" you know what your problem is? you like women more than money"

 

[FierceRacoon]

that's a stretch. What kind of skill can you learn so quickly to go from 12k to 150k a year? And so cheaply?
Most skills I know that make 150k a year require more than 5 years of experience.

 

[A_Random_Guy]

from the money you make =
....1/3 goes into emergency fund account (and use that to pay taxes too)
....1/3 goes into investment fund to make more money
....1/3 is yours to invest in yourself however you want (clothes, courses, car, etc.)

In a recent video of Dan Lok, he said that he followed the 5 bucket strategy.
From your income,
... 60% goes to basic necessities(food, housing bills, electricity, etc)
... 10% goes to investment(stocks, bank etc)
...10% goes to an emergency fund(you don't use this money. EVER. Unless you are about to die)
...10% goes to learning skills and personal development
...10% goes to FUN money(your entertainments, dating, online subscription etc)

Once your income bracket crosses 500k$,

...35% goes to basic necessities
...25% goes to investment
...15% goes to an emergency fund
...15% goes to PD and skill development
...10% goes to FUN money

This seems to be really well-planned use of money. If you have a fixed amount to spend on fun, you won't regret your actions of buying stuff later.

 

[Kevin88660]

Getting a professional shot for Tinder is not weird. The question is about affordability and whether you should spend your time on tinder instead of making money. My guy instinct is not now.

But eventually when you decide to have a Tinder account, go to the gym to get bulk up and then hire a professional photographer. Go for the kill. Nothing good comes out “naturally”. Unless you just want to be the 90 percent of the boys who like every girls they see but receives no reply. And then they give up and complain about girls being superficial.

 

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[MHP368]

Shooting from the hip?

If I was 19 with 3k cash id start doing lonnie deals

 

[Champion]

Hey man, so heres my opinion:

Buying those things will NOT get you a better social life and will NOT get you more confidence and will NOT get you more girls.

The main thing it will do for you is give you a dopamine spike for a few days, weeks at top.

Im currently 25 years old and I think my biggest mistake thus far has been drowning myself in way too much theory and not taking action on anything of what I was learning. Alongside this mistake, was that I never really put the effort to find a MENTOR in real life who could support and push me.

My advice to you:

Think about where you want to see yourself in ONE YEAR from now. Whats the answer? Is it to be healthier? Is it to be richer? Is it to have a better social life?

Whatever it is, look for a mentor, someone who has already reached what you want most. If its health (for example to have a nice gym body), then spend the 3k on the most fittest and coolest personal trainer you can find. Is your goal to make more money? Find the person who is hustling most in his business and is already making money and then offer him to invest your 3k in his business for only 1% stake as well as work for free. Work alongside him and learn. That would be my advice! Alternatively, you can invest 1k and keep the 2k for actually surviving (i.e. buy foods and also to buy FREE time with the 2k).

Best,
Champion

 

[Rawr]

I'm 19. Been working during the summer. I have saved up about 3 thousand dollars. However, I've very tempted to spend half of that on a shitty car, another 5 hundred dollars on some clothing (since I have absolutely no wardrobe), and the other thousand on other things I want (such as getting a photoshoot done for my social media, a video camera so that I can start documenting my journey...).
Basically my confidence is down. I don't have decent clothing, I don't have a car, I look like shit, I have a shitty romantic and social life.

At the same time, I'm looking at things in the long run. Perhaps it's best to just keep saving and to spend this money on business ideas to eventually make even more money. Maybe I should just say F*UCK YOU to my confidence for a few more years until I have solid passive income coming my way.

What do y'all think?

Do girls look at you at all? Car does help you a lot. But you need some kind of a social life already - either friends to go see, or events, you know. One thing you can do is go to sosuave forum and do a DJ Boot Camp - Week #1 which will have you going out on your own accomplishing challenges which will be giving you tons of confidence.

So yeah, car is my vote.

Dont buy a shitty car. If something breaks and you will need another $500-1500 into it, youll be wanting to kill yourself.

Buying a honda, toyota, and negotating from 2k+ to around 2k would be my move. (like trying to get $200-300 off).

Clothes - I currently have more clothes than I can wear. You can fall down that rabbit hole quick, buying new pieces that you think will work for specific occasion, but occasion doesnt come and now you just have spent that money. So I buy all my clothes at heavy discounts online. But for you it will still be pricey. I would not buy anything at retail. I would go on ebay and snipe good looking t-shirts designer brands for like $15-20. Get a few of those. Get a pair of black jeans and blue jeans or chinos. Something you can mix and match w tshirts. Id go into second hand stores too.


3k is not much so dont think you have money to go out eating, etc. Still be frugal with spending but you can go get ice cream w girl and whatever. Just basically you can have the means to get yourself around to different new things, and new opportunities can come in to you.

 

[Ernman]

At the same time, I'm looking at things in the long run. Perhaps it's best to just keep saving and to spend this money on business ideas to eventually make even more money. Maybe I should just say F*UCK YOU to my confidence for a few more years until I have solid passive income coming my way.

So drop the BS and look at the long run. What's next? You saved $3K! That's awesome, really. When I was 19 I didn't have crap. Treat yourself with some nice - but functional - clothes and figure out how to put the rest to work. We all need clothes - society kind of demands it. And it's amazing what a head boost some nice duds can give us. But don't go crazy.

More than anything else - get to work on what's next. You keep being successful and you can't help but gain confidence. And the most attractive thing to women - gals correct me if I'm wrong - is confidence.