Lack of focus and distractions

[HyperA]

I am 21 year old. I keep battling bad habits like constant social media checking, laziness, other distractions like "I will just quick check facebook" "Oh, my gf text me, better check it out" "My room is quite messy. Nah, it's not messy enough to clean it" "oh, there is a really interesting 2 hour podcast about bussiness, I should check it out" and things like that which constantly steals my focus to actually do something. Also, what I've realised that the more I read about business in the forums, social media, etc. the harder it gets to actually focus on one thing only and I get lost between ideas. Combining laziness and having way too much information keeps me stuck. As long as I will have these addictions and laziness that controls me, the more time I will delay my success.

The worst thing is, it doesn't bother me. It feels like ''nah, I will do this other day'' "The other day will come" "I still have plenty of time" . I know it's so wrong. If I don't do it today, I will never do it. But I just can't. Which is really sad because I want my day to be as productive as possible.

I really want to be productive. I am trying my best. I eat clean. I go to gym 4-5 times and I have really good looking body. I meditate for 20-30 minutes everyday (really good for mental health). I read a lot. I don't watch tiktoks or short form content. I go to shitty work from 9am to 5pm monday-friday.

I have made a goal to learn to create websites using wordpress for atleast an hour a day. (this is one and only current entrepreneurial goal I have and I just can't focus enough on it, it just gets boring and It's really hard to combat that boredom constantly and often I give up on that, which is my biggest issue)

How do you guys combat things like that? How do you keep focused? How do you combat boredom? Please, share your stories, insights, thoughts, criticism. Any reply would be appreciated.

Thank you for reading that much!

 

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[EngineerThis]

I am 21 year old. I keep battling bad habits like constant social media checking, laziness, other distractions like "I will just quick check facebook" "Oh, my gf text me, better check it out" "My room is quite messy. Nah, it's not messy enough to clean it" "oh, there is a really interesting 2 hour podcast about bussiness, I should check it out" and things like that which constantly steals my focus to actually do something. Also, what I've realised that the more I read about business in the forums, social media, etc. the harder it gets to actually focus on one thing only and I get lost between ideas. Combining laziness and having way too much information keeps me stuck. As long as I will have these addictions and laziness that controls me, the more time I will delay my success.

The worst thing is, it doesn't bother me. It feels like ''nah, I will do this other day'' "The other day will come" "I still have plenty of time" . I know it's so wrong. If I don't do it today, I will never do it. But I just can't. Which is really sad because I want my day to be as productive as possible.

I really want to be productive. I am trying my best. I eat clean. I go to gym 4-5 times and I have really good looking body. I meditate for 20-30 minutes everyday (really good for mental health). I read a lot. I don't watch tiktoks or short form content. I go to shitty work from 9am to 5pm monday-friday.

I have made a goal to learn to create websites using wordpress for atleast an hour a day. (this is one and only current entrepreneurial goal I have and I just can't focus enough on it, it just gets boring and It's really hard to combat that boredom constantly and often I give up on that, which is my biggest issue)

How do you guys combat things like that? How do you keep focused? How do you combat boredom? Please, share your stories, insights, thoughts, criticism. Any reply would be appreciated.

Thank you for reading that much!

1. Forgive yourself for your past mistakes and laziness. Dwelling will only make it worse.
2. A 9-5 Job is soul crushing so that’s mainly to blame.
3. You need to think of your “Why”… why do you bother working out? Why do you bother learning websites?… without a clear purpose your work is meaningless and not fun.
4. Sounds like you have a routine.. they’re good. But also don’t be afraid to break it to try something new.
5. Yes you’re young, you feel invincible, you feel like you have plenty of years left… Fact is this isn’t true. You know this. But this only comes with maturity, I felt the same. I’m finally growing out of that since I got married, and have a kid on the way. I’m 28
6. Don’t be afraid to work, it’s great to get paid, learn new skills, and have some stability. Maybe take a new job that does have those promises even at a lower pay.. Entrepreneurship ain’t easy, and takes a while to build.
7. Don’t be afraid to have fun, and by all means… MEET PEOPLE AND NETWORK. My number one regret is not doing enough of that sooner.

 

[HyperA]

1. Forgive yourself for your past mistakes and laziness. Dwelling will only make it worse.
2. A 9-5 Job is soul crushing so that’s mainly to blame.
3. You need to think of your “Why”… why do you bother working out? Why do you bother learning websites?… without a clear purpose your work is meaningless and not fun.
4. Sounds like you have a routine.. they’re good. But also don’t be afraid to break it to try something new.
5. Yes you’re young, you feel invincible, you feel like you have plenty of years left… Fact is this isn’t true. You know this. But this only comes with maturity, I felt the same. I’m finally growing out of that since I got married, and have a kid on the way. I’m 28
6. Don’t be afraid to work, it’s great to get paid, learn new skills, and have some stability. Maybe take a new job that does have those promises even at a lower pay.. Entrepreneurship ain’t easy, and takes a while to build.
7. Don’t be afraid to have fun, and by all means… MEET PEOPLE AND NETWORK. My number one regret is not doing enough of that sooner.

That's a really good points you've made. Purpose thing really keeps me going to the gym - because I want to be better looking and stronger than other guys. That's an huge ego thing - but that helps me to keep going. Even if I don't want to go to gym, I still go.

I don't really meet people I know, because we are not sharing the same values and LITERALLY, I don't want to be like them. When we meet, they talk about what happened at the party when they were all drunk and when the next drinking session coming. EVERY TIME. I grew out of this, I don't drink and it is not fun for me anymore. It just downgrades me. I stopped hanging out with them completely. And i'm glad for that. I really want to meet people who share the same values as me. I just wonder. How you find people with similar growth mindset and create networks?

 

[WJK]

That's a really good points you've made. Purpose thing really keeps me going to the gym - because I want to be better looking and stronger than other guys. That's an huge ego thing - but that helps me to keep going. Even if I don't want to go to gym, I still go.

I don't really meet people I know, because we are not sharing the same values and LITERALLY, I don't want to be like them. When we meet, they talk about what happened at the party when they were all drunk and when the next drinking session coming. EVERY TIME. I grew out of this, I don't drink and it is not fun for me anymore. It just downgrades me. I stopped hanging out with them completely. And i'm glad for that. I really want to meet people who share the same values as me. I just wonder. How you find people with similar growth mindset and create networks?

You get out and do new activities that involve people. Changed out your workout routines. Go to some community runs or events. Take a hike on a busy trail. Go to community activities where there are people. Join a group that builds websites. Change jobs. Go to the local youth center and volunteer to teach kids how to build websites. You could create your own tribe of kids. Talked to local business people. Can you trade building them a website for goods or services? Whatever you do, get out there. Your couch is not going to sprout people or relationships.

As far as keeping your space neat and cleaned up -- it's really simple. A place for everything and everything in its place. Your personal space is a direct reflection of your mind. So, you are admitting through your surroundings that your mind is a mental mess? Dedicate a few minutes in the mornings and a few more in the evenings to cleaning up. The exercise goes like this. You pick up one item and put it away. Then you pick up the next item and put it away. Then you pick up the third item and put it away. Did you get it? Keep repeating the steps until your world is neat and clean. Over time it becomes automatic -- a habit that you don't even think about. And you will realize that you have two hands. You can take two items to their "homes" at one time to double your efforts. Eventually, you may figure out to just put them away when you use them, so you don't have to spend the time later.

 

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[EngineerThis]

You get out and do new activities that involve people. Changed out your workout routines. Go to some community runs or events. Take a hike on a busy trail. Go to community activities where there are people. Join a group that builds websites. Change jobs. Go to the local youth center and volunteer to teach kids how to build websites. You could create your own tribe of kids. Talked to local business people. Can you trade building them a website for goods or services? Whatever you do, get out there. Your couch is not going to sprout people or relationships.

As far as keeping your space neat and cleaned up -- it's really simple. A place for everything and everything in its place. Your personal space is a direct reflection of your mind. So, you are admitting through your surroundings that your mind is a mental mess? Dedicate a few minutes in the mornings and a few more in the evenings to cleaning up. The exercise goes like this. You pick up one item and put it away. Then you pick up the next item and put it away. Then you pick up the third item and put it away. Did you get it? Keep repeating the steps until your world is neat and clean. Over time it becomes automatic -- a habit that you don't even think about. And you will realize that you have two hands. You can take two items to their "homes" at one time to double your efforts. Eventually, you may figure out to just put them away when you use them, so you don't have to spend the time later.

Also, most of your stuff probably is just clutter that you don’t need. Be ruthless and toss out/donate a lot of your stuff, it’s just stuff.
Bonus motivation your pad will always be ready to bring a girl home. No worries about that!

 

[Plushy]

Social media and distractions give you stimulation and dopamine. What I found worked for me was that talking to people and posting in communities like this also gave me dopamine. The times I was most aligned with my goals were when my environment happened to gamify my goals. Instead of wishing that I could just be self motivated, my self motivation is structuring my environment to fuel my goals.

The best way to find ambitious people is at campuses or workplaces. If you start sharing your progress people might come out of the woodwork to support you and feel safe confiding in you about their own goals and dreams.

Also what helped me when learning web building was to have a goal like "I want to create a website that show cases this thing I really love" rather than a time limit. But sometimes if it's hard to get started doing a time limit helps. Either way the most motivating thing is seeing results and progress. So do whatever you need to make yourself take the first steps.

I think there's an insidious and unspoken myth in self improvement that you're just magically supposed to be self motivated, that they're just built different or that someone else has the answer. The best answer comes from examining what has worked for you in your life. One of my pet theories is that all these self help gurus are actually dangerously insecure themselves and use their channels to motivate themselves, not spreading truth but just whatever helps them.