Is it possible to reduce your ambition to become happier?

[GatsbyMag]

I'm at a point in my life where I'm making progress but I seem to have this never-ending desire to do more and be more.

My problem is that I have too much ambition.

People in our community rarely discuss this and I feel like it's because I'm one of the rare few who has this problem.

Imagine you have unlimited car fuel but your vehicle (skills and abilities) is average and fails to burn greater than 40% of the fuel. That's exactly how I feel.

If I could, I'd try to improve my vehicle so I could put the fuel to good use, however there's a limit to how much I can improve my skill, I just do not have the ability to get any of my skills to 1% level or even combine them to achieve something that allows my fuel to accommodate.

The best option at this point is to try and deplete my fuel (at least temporarily) so that I can continue to refine my skill and appreciate what I have in the meantime.

Symptoms I've experienced:

• Can only sleep 5 hours
• Constant movement, I need to workout/dance daily just to keep myself 'at bay'
• Easily get bored at office job, I'm in sales but I get bored of doing the same thing and meeting targets every month
• Constant urge to create something

I'm doing better than all my peers but it's never enough for me and I just want to do so much. My current online business is doing okay, but I try not to touch it because I'm worried that my impatience and restlessness will ruin the progress made.

Any advice?

 

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[Deleted50669]

I'm at a point in my life where I'm making progress but I seem to have this never-ending desire to do more and be more.

My problem is that I have too much ambition.

People in our community rarely discuss this and I feel like it's because I'm one of the rare few who has this problem.

Imagine you have unlimited car fuel but your vehicle (skills and abilities) is average and fails to burn greater than 40% of the fuel. That's exactly how I feel.

If I could, I'd try to improve my vehicle so I could put the fuel to good use, however there's a limit to how much I can improve my skill, I just do not have the ability to get any of my skills to 1% level or even combine them to achieve something that allows my fuel to accommodate.

The best option at this point is to try and deplete my fuel (at least temporarily) so that I can continue to refine my skill and appreciate what I have in the meantime.

Symptoms I've experienced:

• Can only sleep 5 hours
• Constant movement, I need to workout/dance daily just to keep myself 'at bay'
• Easily get bored at office job, I'm in sales but I get bored of doing the same thing and meeting targets every month
• Constant urge to create something

I'm doing better than all my peers but it's never enough for me and I just want to do so much. My current online business is doing okay, but I try not to touch it because I'm worried that my impatience and restlessness will ruin the progress made.

Any advice?

No matter who you are, everyone's got a breaking point. You can't keep going to the well once it runs dry, you gotta fill it up again. It sounds like you have no goals other than to do better. Part of the purpose for specific goals is to define success for yourself. When you hit success benchmarks, it's ok to let off the gas pedal temporarily. That creates balance. I call it the inchworm philosophy. During periods of hard grind, Im expanding my resources and stretching myself thin. When I hit a milestone, I need to recover and regroup. It's a rhythm you have to find. If you don't pay attention to it, it'll burn you out, as you're experiencing.

 

[Madame Peccato]

You constantly have a urge of creating something, you are always on the move, and you have way more energy than you consume.

So my question is: why aren't you using the extra energy to create something? And if time is the issue, what is stopping you from replacing an activity you are doing with one better suited to your goals and ambitions?

To answer the question in the title, yes, you absolutely can reduce your ambition to become happier. The topic was discussed at large in a meditation thread around here that I'll edit into this post as soon as I find it. The gist of it was that meditation can make you happier with where you are , instead of constantly striving to achieve more and becoming better.

 

[GatsbyMag]

You constantly have a urge of creating something, you are always on the move, and you have way more energy than you consume.

So my question is: why aren't you using the extra energy to create something? And if time is the issue, what is stopping you from replacing an activity you are doing with one better suited to your goals and ambitions?

To answer the question in the title, yes, you absolutely can reduce your ambition to become happier. The topic was discussed at large in a meditation thread around here that I'll edit into this post as soon as I find it. The gist of it was that meditation can make you happier with where you are , instead of constantly striving to achieve more and becoming better.

I'll also look for that thread. If you can find it, I'd appreciate it too.

To answer your question, I am creating, I am acting on all my ambitions but not much result aside from a few indicators of interest and sales calls. But I continue prospecting, redesigning etc. to try and make something happen, I'm in what MJ describes as a 'desert of [something]' in his book; the place where you're not getting much output despite your input.

In the meantime, I need something to sort of quench my ambition; maybe I just need to switch jobs to something more interesting, so that I can keep distracted instead of becoming frustrated while I'm in this 'desert'.

I guess that's the solution. I just need something new to keep me distracted. Then at night, I can return to my business endeavour and keep swinging until something more happens.

Cheers everyone @404profound @Madame Peccato

 

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[Madame Peccato]

Here you go @GatsbyMag, especially from post #6

HOT TOPIC - Your Thoughts On Meditation? | The Fastlane Entrepreneur Forum (thefastlaneforum.com)

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Is it possible to reduce your ambition to become happier?​

Yes, but not a reduction of ambition, just assigning less thought to it ... "ambition" is a future oriented concept.

If you're thinking about the future always, you are robbing the present. There needs to be balance of enjoying the moment, the process, while also being mindful of your longer-term goals.

The more I immerse myself into the moment, the happier I am. Dwelling on the past/future is what robs happiness of the moment. If you try to control everything in the world around you, you will always be miserable.

As I get older, the idea that "happiness is a choice" becomes more and more true. Happiness seems to be jeaopardized when our heads are always in the past (I failed!), or the future (I'm worried about X,Y, and Z!).

 

[MTF]

I guess that's the solution. I just need something new to keep me distracted. Then at night, I can return to my business endeavour and keep swinging until something more happens.

What if the solution is not to do more but actually stop and not do?

GOLD! - HOT! - MINDSET - 60 Days of 60 Minutes of Meditation - Let's Not Do Anything Together

Do you feel overwhelmed by the incessant mind chatter? Do you struggle to focus? Do desires rule your life? Are you dealing with recurring mental issues like anxiety, feelings of guilt, shame, fear, inadequacy, stress, etc.? Do you find it impossible to just stop and relax? As entrepreneurs...

www.thefastlaneforum.com

 

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[TheKingOfMadrid]

Is it possible? Of course, if you look at religions/philosophies like Buddhism there is a strong emphasis on removing the self from secular desires and ambitions. Buddhist writers like Bankei would go further and look to suggest a removal of any future based concept entirely, living only within the moment. The end goal of this is that the cessation of attachment leads to the cessation of suffering and 'joy' in the moment is able to be felt on a far more pronounced level.

But this is where it really pays to have done the work in learning to know who you really are. What do YOU really want from your life? Are you content to walk down that path of quelling your ambition for less stress? Will you be content to sail away into the ocean at this point in your life?

People are always too binary in these matters. You can be fully of ambition and joy but it's all about the mindset you have and the responsibilities you've set.

Thinking you need to be stressed and angry to have results or utilise your ambition is stupid.

What I suggest is that you need to detach a need for an outcome from your work. You sound like you are living a factory life in which you need to just keep learning value, keep creating skills and make more money/ sense of accomplishment.

What if you split goals between those that NEED completing (for your survival) and those where you can be playful. Learn to enjoy trying to new things again (as with your online business) and don't constantly be thinking 'what if I fail!?'

Your fuel, no matter the capacity is is yours and the car will only ever take you on the journey you point it in. Learn to enjoy that journey and avoid always looking for the destination.

 

[Olimac21]

Naval Ravikant spoke about this, maybe it will help you to clarify your current position.

Naval Ravikant Desire is a Contract

 

[Johnny boy]

you can’t have too much ambition but you can have too much delusion, too little patience, too much neuroticism, too many emotions, etc.

You probably don’t have enough ambition actually. I haven’t met a single person who has too much. I’ve met plenty of f*cked up people with too many other negative traits though.

 

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[GrandRub]

just create things till you are tired.

 

[Think Expand]

Ambitions are like the fuel for your life. They empower you to press on and achieve better things. If you feel you're doing okay and stop pushing to do more, you will develop the disease of complacency.

First, you set a target to make 1K, then 10K, and then 100K and then 1million... and so on. It never ends. Even Jeff Bezos still want to grow his company and make more $$$....

There is nothing wrong with wanting to make more... That is what makes us humans. We have an ending desire to get better, to do better and to achieve more. What you have to focus on when you want to live a happy life is not to reduce your ambitions... but ask your self if you're living in alignment with your passion, purpose, and core values.

When you are living your purpose in life, you make more and still feel happy. You do what you have passion for and still making money. Wow! That's awesome. And then you give part of what you earn to support the cause of the needy, the helpless and the fable in your community.

Combine passion, purpose, charity and living a good life together and you will find true happiness. Dream big, think big, pursue your dreams... but immerse yourself into the daily process of living your purpose, core values, helping others and giving to put a smile on the face of others.

I trust this helps!

 

[Jon Foreman]

Wow, that's really interesting! This post reminds me of myself!

I've been working on this for quite a while now and I narrowed the solution down to two things:

1. Whatever you're doing right now is too difficult and/or isn't giving you tangible results. Because of my ambition I was always thinking about great, complex projects that takes months if not years to complete. I go at it for months until I realize it isn't working and get discouraged. Make it simple! Create really small tasksk and easy successes to silence that ambition because you have the feeling that you're actually getting somewhere.

2. Live in the moment, only what matters is now. Just read the reply from MJ above. It's true and probably the most important thing you should fix to transform you live and be a muuuuuuch happier person. Pour as much time into this as you can to learn this. I'm not there yet but has made the biggest change in my life and I know it'll be the key to my future success. Funny isn't it, the key to our future success is to be in the moment. I always thought it was the other way around. When I have success in the future I'll be in the moment, it's a lie.

Good luck!

Jon

 

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[GatsbyMag]

Update:

I got a job to keep me distracted by day, and at night I focus on business.

Sounds counterintuitive, but I feel more productive knowing that I don't have all day to think about why my marketing isn't working , or the time to get lost in reading too much about a problem I'm having within my business.

It's more pressure but I like it that way, for now at least.

My goal is definitely great, but I don't see why I cannot realize it within under a year. I don't care about making millions $$ immediately, I only want to build a service/product that is slowly getting traction (people actively using it, growth by WOM).

The only thing I need is an ability to uncover market need and capture my market's interest. I have no interesting in waiting for opportunity, I'm doing everything I can to seize it with my hands.

But I've certainly learned to live more in the moment & appreciate what I've been blessed with.

 

[awsamro]

I'm at a point in my life where I'm making progress but I seem to have this never-ending desire to do more and be more.

My problem is that I have too much ambition.

People in our community rarely discuss this and I feel like it's because I'm one of the rare few who has this problem.

Imagine you have unlimited car fuel but your vehicle (skills and abilities) is average and fails to burn greater than 40% of the fuel. That's exactly how I feel.

If I could, I'd try to improve my vehicle so I could put the fuel to good use, however there's a limit to how much I can improve my skill, I just do not have the ability to get any of my skills to 1% level or even combine them to achieve something that allows my fuel to accommodate.

The best option at this point is to try and deplete my fuel (at least temporarily) so that I can continue to refine my skill and appreciate what I have in the meantime.

Symptoms I've experienced:

• Can only sleep 5 hours
• Constant movement, I need to workout/dance daily just to keep myself 'at bay'
• Easily get bored at office job, I'm in sales but I get bored of doing the same thing and meeting targets every month
• Constant urge to create something

I'm doing better than all my peers but it's never enough for me and I just want to do so much. My current online business is doing okay, but I try not to touch it because I'm worried that my impatience and restlessness will ruin the progress made.

Any advice?

I think its dangerous to base your happiness on your achievements. You should in theory aim to be happy whether you achieve your ambition or not. Be happy that you have eye sight, can hear, that you are healthy, that you can understand English...etc. Plenty of things to be happy about if you look harder.
I suggest writing down a list of things you are grateful for and noticing people who are less fortunate than you rather than only noticing people who you perceive are better than you. Start your list with:
I can see.
I can walk.
I have ambition.
I have food .... etc
Hope this helps

 

[afrankmore]

No matter who you are, everyone's got a breaking point. You can't keep going to the well once it runs dry, you gotta fill it up again. It sounds like you have no goals other than to do better. Part of the purpose for specific goals is to define success for yourself. When you hit success benchmarks, it's ok to let off the gas pedal temporarily. That creates balance. I call it the inchworm philosophy. During periods of hard grind, Im expanding my resources and stretching myself thin. When I hit a milestone, I need to recover and regroup. It's a rhythm you have to find. If you don't pay attention to it, it'll burn you out, as you're experiencing.

So.. if I understand this correctly and in my generational terms.... hustle, hustle, hustle hit that milestone....Regroup, Recharge...Then hustle, hustle and hustle some more for that next milestone?

 

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[Deleted50669]

So.. if I understand this correctly and in my generational terms.... hustle, hustle, hustle hit that milestone....Regroup, Recharge...Then hustle, hustle and hustle some more for that next milestone?

Basically, always take time to pause, inspect progress, determine if any changes in strategy are needed, plan the next spurt of effort, etc