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RANT I'm 21 right now and i think i lost the will to live

Sebastya

Silver Contributor
Dec 22, 2014
531
589
262
Los Angeles
If that's all it took for you to lose the will to live, you may not be cut out for entrepreneurship.

A lot worse things will happen down the road, so I hope you can gain some perspective and understand how much work and failure you'll need to continue to endure before you actually succeed. I'd recommend watching some Gary Vaynerchuk videos which may help shape your mindset.
 

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OP
OP
MoneyHacker

MoneyHacker

Bronze Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Dec 5, 2018
120
107
67
21
Somewhere in Asia
Don't just try, DO. It all starts with the language. It really does.

I am not a big fan of Tony Robbins, but there's one lesson I learned from him that helped me stick to certain habits.

"People will do more to avoid pain than they do to gain pleasure."

Imagine what your life is going to be like in 5-10-20 years from now if you continue with your bad habits and work ethic. List all the painful things that will happen.

Use this as a leverage to persevere through hardships.


If you want to take it further, write it on a piece of paper by also adding all the positive things that will happen if you commit to the process. Read this every morning when you wake up.



#GOLD
Absolutely i will do it, i'm poor and i'm desperate, i have nothing to lose right now. I used to have a girlfriend, be good and pretty famous at school (lol). But now i have nothing so nothing to lose or makes me afraid. I will do anything to get out of this situation. Thank you.
 
OP
OP
MoneyHacker

MoneyHacker

Bronze Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Dec 5, 2018
120
107
67
21
Somewhere in Asia
So much good advice here. But let's look at what you really have. You have a biz in T-shirts that is run off of ads. Is that a biz? No, that's a hobby or a side line that might make you a little money.

You have an entitlement mind-set that thinks all you have to do is have a product and post some ads and collect lots of money. And it's not taking off, so you feel you're failing. What do you expect for the amount of effort you're putting into it? If I decided to import toasters and run some ads, should I expect "that" to be a business - should I expect to make money? Do I even deserve to make money by doing so little effort? What if I added another "product line" like toothbrushes? See how ridiculous this is?

I'm not saying this to make you feel bad. But if you can't lay your biz out in a chart and see what it really is, then you're totally lost.

It's not hard to recover. For immediate results take an easy part time job. 4 hours a day just "being there." Work in a movie theatre taking tickets. Grocery store stocking shelves. Tons of instant easy jobs out there. THEN, if you want to, you can take a portion of that money to fund your ads.

Be practical. See what you really have and where you really are. Your problems are not problems at all if you step back and look at them. You think you should have a thriving biz giving you tons of money. You have an effort that might make a little money on the side. Don't set your expectations too high. Geesh - if it was this easy, everyone and their brother would throw up a biz, launch some ads, and sit back and collect money.

If you change your expectations you will see that you are doing quite well for what you have.
Thank you, i know that and i have said in my thread that this selling tshirt thing is not the thing i want to do to the rest of my life. But i have to do it go gain knowledge and money and maybe a small success that gives me confidence to start something bigger. But i will give all of my effort in to this, and beside that i will learn how to build an ecommerce brand at the same time . Now i don't even have enough money to do dropshipping stuff let alone building a brand that requires lots of money to pay for the cost of products. I know this is small right now, but i'm not compromised with this, i will keep moving on and let's see how it goes.
 
OP
OP
MoneyHacker

MoneyHacker

Bronze Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Dec 5, 2018
120
107
67
21
Somewhere in Asia
As a word on addictions, instead of abstaining from them: replace them. Get addicted to something else, not easy but food for thought
Thank you, i'm doing that right now. no way i could focus 100 percent of my energy on my business unless i get rid of all of my addictions.
 
OP
OP
MoneyHacker

MoneyHacker

Bronze Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Dec 5, 2018
120
107
67
21
Somewhere in Asia
If that's all it took for you to lose the will to live, you may not be cut out for entrepreneurship.

A lot worse things will happen down the road, so I hope you can gain some perspective and understand how much work and failure you'll need to continue to endure before you actually succeed. I'd recommend watching some Gary Vaynerchuk videos which may help shape your mindset.
yeah i know, my mental strenght is at its bottom at the time i wrote the thread. But now i'm recovered, so i will get back to work. I read many of articles and all confirm that what makes a good entrepreneur is never giving up. I know it from the beginning but it was just so hard i thought i could fall, but i didn't and now i get back. Thank you.
 
OP
OP
MoneyHacker

MoneyHacker

Bronze Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Dec 5, 2018
120
107
67
21
Somewhere in Asia
I have spent all yesterday night and today morning with some sleepings in between (it's now 2:30 pm here) to work on my problems and i have done these things:

I adopted a new way to organize everything, i used to right down everything in a notebook (todo list, schedule,...) it was so inconvenient but i didn't realize it so i kept using. I have done some researches on better way to organize everything and i found many management web app. After trying almost every apps there are 2 left that i like the most, Trello and Workflowy. I'm a simple man so i decided that i would use Workflowy but sadly the free version is so restricted, but i'm poor right now. So i searched for alternatives and finally landed on Dynalist, i love the app so far to this point.

I have made a page call "Good Habits" dedicated to solving my additions and developing good habits after that. I have 5 habits at the moment:
1. No television - in which i divided into 4 smaller habits
1.1. No television (i can still watch movie on my desktop)
1.2. No movie on my desktop (i can still watch entertaining videos on Youtube)
1.3. No entertaining videos on Youtube (only use Youtube to learn english and for educational purpose)
1.4. No entertainment at all (Only learn english and learn things that are useful to me)
2. No porn
3. Masturbate correctly (i thought i would name it no masturbation but after doing some researches i came to the conclusion that i can not stop masturbating because it's biological, i could only control it)
4. Sleep correctly
5. Workout daily
-----------
All 5 habits have smaller habits inside of them and i will only do one small habit at a time. My first habit will be No television and after 15 days then my second habit will be No porn's first small habit (no porn site but i can watch nsfw on reddit). I will execute it slowly and then gradually raise the speed. If i fail one small habit, i will reset the day count to zero but only at the small habit, not resetting the big habit. That will keep me going and not cause too much disappointment.

I made 2 pages called "To-do list" and "Business" to manage my business. "To-do list" will be used to list my long-term plan with my business and also short-term to-dos that i will need to execute. In the "To-do list" i also add many pictures of income of the people doing ecommerce in my country as motivation. "Business" page will be used to manage my business, all the resources and the cost will be included in so that i could monitor and adjust if necessary.

Finally i have a page called "Learning" that i will use to learn about how to build good habits and how to build a successful ecommerce brand also learning about english and startup in general.

So much to do and i'm excited to see how it goes.
 
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Tourmaline

Bronze Contributor
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Jun 4, 2019
431
352
129
Texas
I have spent all yesterday night and today morning with some sleepings in between (it's now 2:30 pm here) to work on my problems and i have done these things:

I adopted a new way to organize everything, i used to right down everything in a notebook (todo list, schedule,...) it was so inconvenient but i didn't realize it so i kept using. I have done some researches on better way to organize everything and i found many management web app. After trying almost every apps there are 2 left that i like the most, Trello and Workflowy. I'm a simple man so i decided that i would use Workflowy but sadly the free version is so restricted, but i'm poor right now. So i searched for alternatives and finally landed on Dynalist, i love the app so far to this point.

I have made a page call "Good Habits" dedicated to solving my additions and developing good habits after that. I have 5 habits at the moment:
1. No television - in which i divided into 4 smaller habits
1.1. No television (i can still watch movie on my desktop)
1.2. No movie on my desktop (i can still watch entertaining videos on Youtube)
1.3. No entertaining videos on Youtube (only use Youtube to learn english and for educational purpose)
1.4. No entertainment at all (Only learn english and learn things that are useful to me)
2. No porn
3. Masturbate correctly (i thought i would name it no masturbation but after doing some researches i came to the conclusion that i can not stop masturbating because it's biological, i could only control it)
4. Sleep correctly
5. Workout daily
-----------
All 5 habits have smaller habits inside of them and i will only do one small habit at a time. My first habit will be No television and after 15 days then my second habit will be No porn's first small habit (no porn site but i can watch nsfw on reddit). I will execute it slowly and then gradually raise the speed. If i fail one small habit, i will reset the day count to zero but only at the small habit, not resetting the big habit. That will keep me going and not cause too much disappointment.

I made 2 pages called "To-do list" and "Business" to manage my business. "To-do list" will be used to list my long-term plan with my business and also short-term to-dos that i will need to execute. In the "To-do list" i also add many pictures of income of the people doing ecommerce in my country as motivation. "Business" page will be used to manage my business, all the resources and the cost will be included in so that i could monitor and adjust if necessary.

Finally i have a page called "Learning" that i will use to learn about how to build good habits and how to build a successful ecommerce brand also learning about english and startup in general.

So much to do and i'm excited to see how it goes.
What will you do for relaxation? Seems like you may want to write down what you will allow yourself to do for this.

Bro you made 5k? I'm 30 you know how much I've made? Zero. If you did it once you can do it again. Keep going.
:oops:
 

Ing

Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Jun 8, 2019
63
29
23
Brothe rof a friend of mine:
Countersinkes 50000€ by trying to make money with tshirts. And they were very good and cool. I built the first tshirt print machine with him.
While studiing, he made a seo program( one of the first, about 1990, than deal with google. First million s when google got in sharen.
Built a e marketing buisiness, sold for millions, built the next, sold.
Now i think lets make clothes in chona and earns millions with that.

So dont give up, theres allways a way.

But: don’t forget your friends!
 
OP
OP
MoneyHacker

MoneyHacker

Bronze Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Dec 5, 2018
120
107
67
21
Somewhere in Asia
What will you do for relaxation? Seems like you may want to write down what you will allow yourself to do for this.



:oops:
Yeah, I have done that and i narrowed it down to some useful activities that could replace my addictions.
 

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OP
OP
MoneyHacker

MoneyHacker

Bronze Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Dec 5, 2018
120
107
67
21
Somewhere in Asia
Brothe rof a friend of mine:
Countersinkes 50000€ by trying to make money with tshirts. And they were very good and cool. I built the first tshirt print machine with him.
While studiing, he made a seo program( one of the first, about 1990, than deal with google. First million s when google got in sharen.
Built a e marketing buisiness, sold for millions, built the next, sold.
Now i think lets make clothes in chona and earns millions with that.

So dont give up, theres allways a way.

But: don’t forget your friends!
Thank you my friend, i'm not thinking of giving up right now, i don't have anything left so nothing to lose :D
 

luniac

Gold Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Dec 7, 2012
1,648
2,468
577
29
brooklyn
i was addicted to porn long time, only in recent times i finally stopped.
take it slow man, the addiction is part of you, you can be in control.
feel that urge fully, understand it, and then let go of it.
its not evil or powerful, ur bigger than it. u can do it.
 

Mr992

New Contributor
Nov 29, 2016
31
18
47
You're 21 and have made money with your own idea. If life was a video game, you're still on the main menu, messing with the settings.

You live in the best period of human history.

You've reached out for help, that's good. Now take action on the advice and help yourself out. Get your mental health sorted, search for Jordan Peterson, Tony Robbins and Gary Vee. Read some classic personal developments books (Meditations by Marcus Aurelius, start here).

Once you've sorted out your personal life, find business ideas and take action every day on them. Even small little steps every day are a million times better than no action. Search the forum for ideas and inspiration. Decide what business vertical you wanna get into, what niche. Then go make it happen.

Life is difficult but it's those difficulties that lead us to success and happiness.
 
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OP
OP
MoneyHacker

MoneyHacker

Bronze Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Dec 5, 2018
120
107
67
21
Somewhere in Asia
i was addicted to porn long time, only in recent times i finally stopped.
take it slow man, the addiction is part of you, you can be in control.
feel that urge fully, understand it, and then let go of it.
its not evil or powerful, ur bigger than it. u can do it.
Thanks bro, i'm working on it right now, taking it slowly but firmly.
 
OP
OP
MoneyHacker

MoneyHacker

Bronze Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Dec 5, 2018
120
107
67
21
Somewhere in Asia
You're 21 and have made money with your own idea. If life was a video game, you're still on the main menu, messing with the settings.

You live in the best period of human history.

You've reached out for help, that's good. Now take action on the advice and help yourself out. Get your mental health sorted, search for Jordan Peterson, Tony Robbins and Gary Vee. Read some classic personal developments books (Meditations by Marcus Aurelius, start here).

Once you've sorted out your personal life, find business ideas and take action every day on them. Even small little steps every day are a million times better than no action. Search the forum for ideas and inspiration. Decide what business vertical you wanna get into, what niche. Then go make it happen.

Life is difficult but it's those difficulties that lead us to success and happiness.
Thank you so much, i'm working on my addiction and my business at the same time right now, but i feel in control. I will try to replace my addiction with working and spending time on TFLF more to keep myself improved :D
 

Melissa Tucker

Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Aug 17, 2019
8
30
20
Scottsdale, AZ
So here is my desperate situation: i'm entering my last of 4 years at a university of economics. 3 years ago, i heard about print on demand, selling tshirt in particular from my friends, they said everyone was making lots of money from it, so i thought i would get a try, setting up some facebook ads with the money i saved and sold not a piece of sh*t. I didn't believe it could make money so i just stopped running facebook because i had only about 200$ left, after that i didn't put any real effort into making money, only hanging around looking for a method of making money online and just studied at my university on and off and watched lots of tv, porn and then masturbated.

After that i struggled with tv and porn addiction, tried lots of methods to quit (still struggling now). then about 2 years ago, i found a method of selling tshirt on instagram, they called it free traffic, so i put all of my money into this game, this was actually a success to me. I made in total about 5000$ (very big in my country) in the next 3 months i don't remember exactly. So i scaled like hell, created hundred of accounts to make more money. This was when it hit me in the face. Instagram started to blocked following and then banned lots of accounts. bumped i lost huge amounts of money to proxies and vps,... Disappointed, desperate I fell back into the old track of tv and porn addiction. Then i decided to try one again this time but no spam. Bumped still failed, instagram became too hard.

Now i'm trying to sell tshirt with pinterest, after 6 months of testing with lots of fails and very small profit. I only have now 250$ dollar (enough to cover the cost of the next 3 months of pinterest). i have 20 days more to decide that i should abandon pinterest and try something new with 250$ left or just stick with it, it's like hell because i don't know which way to go. Also i'm owing my school 500$ (one-semester fee), my dad gave me the money but i took it over the pay for the cost. Don't know when i have to pay back, i guess when i graduate. I don't tell my dad of course, this causes me lots of stress because my family is not some kind of rich, just middle-class or something.

I want to do something big, i always want to create a startup that has impact on the world, but i was born in a poor asian country. Struggling with tv, porn, masturbating addiction. Now just do this thing to make money, not creating anything but still not making any money let alone creating something big. I don't know how to code to create my startup. Don't have any valuable relationship. Now not knowing how to make money to continue making money, pay for debt. Should i give up and just confess all with my dad and then try to study hard to graduate and get a job. Maybe making some money until i have enough fund to go back and try. F*ck it, i'm lost now.
Congratulations on taking risks and doing the t-shirt biz! Sounds like you learned A LOT!

I’m also sensing some pain/shame around the addiction, is that true? (I have an addiction podcast that I created in 2015-2017as a passion project ...interviewed quite a few people on the topic.)

If so, there’s a guy who has an amazing podcast - he dives into the science behind why we do what we do. You can drop the addiction (or change anything in your life) pretty fast.


I recommend starting at the beginning & binging on his content! He does have a couple podcasts specifically around habits & addiction.

Start here: EPISODE 45: “Why It’s So Hard To Break Your Bad Habits - Part 2”

Can’t wait to see what business you create next!
 

Kevin88660

Bronze Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Feb 8, 2019
492
435
191
Singapore
No bro, i'm from Vietnam. My country is a little bit behind the world, so i may say the big trend here is still ecommerce, web application or some kind of sharing economy. And the small trend is the next coming mid-autumn festival. I'm thinking of doing ecommerce in my country but the profit margin is so small compared to ecommerce in the USA or Europe i think.
Can try what worked in China. Vietnam is like what China was in the early 2000s.

One popular trend in early 2010s in China was to replicate what worked in U.S. and adapt it in the local market. Lots of fortune was made.
 

LoveLife

New Contributor
Feb 10, 2019
14
15
19
Hey !

You have already received so many great advice, lucky you! :)

In terms of business, I am not there yet to advise.

But in term of mindset I can :). Indeed, I have worked on an addiction for quite some time and the results are amazing! Basically my mindset shift from negative thinking to positive thinking in few weeks of working the program. Yes, it's a program, the 12steps.

You have 12 steps fellowships in basically all possible addictions, even some you would never have thought of. You can find multiple related to porn addiction.

One of the mantra is "Take what you like and leave the rest". So it helps me while I remember that I am not my addiction and I focus on all areas of my life.

I guess I see it as finding a balance.

Take care
 

Jadpapi

Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Mar 31, 2018
43
37
47
33
usa
It’s ok to watch porn, and masturbate when you are 21 one years old.. not all day tho..
 

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Tourmaline

Bronze Contributor
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Jun 4, 2019
431
352
129
Texas

Entre Eyes

Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Bro you made 5k? I'm 30 you know how much I've made? Zero. If you did it once you can do it again. Keep going.
Go to a Auction site. See what JUST SOLD. The seller shares so many details to learn from. You can see how long the domain was registered, they share if they outsource how much it is a free University. Start doing what you know already sells. People are selling Starter sites with no revenue....you can do it.
 

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