I keep repeating the same mistake

[farahead]

First i start of motivated, programming for 4hours, grinding, reading during school.

Suddenly, i start getting extremly unmotivated and i watch porn and scroll on tiktok for hours.


that leads to me getting motivated again and grinding.

and so and so...
- i dont think my discipline is the problem, i take cold shower everyday, exercise read etc..

Has anyone else experienced this "Loop"? If so how did you break out of it?
I dont wanna keep repeating this sine wave of high and low. Thanks in advance

 

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[Nightwolf]

i dont think my discipline is the problem,

Well I think discipline IS infact the problem. Since you were "feeling" motivated and did productive tasks and you were "feeling" demotivated thus leading you to do unproductive tasks, you rely on motivation and not discipline.

Discipline is when you do what you are supposed to do regardless of how you feel. You might be disciplined in some areas of your life, but you need to bring it to other areas as well.

You ARE going to "feel" like not doing what you are supposed to sometimes. I bet even the richest people here felt that way once and occasionally still do. EVERYONE feels that way. But it's about whether we rely on emotions to get shit done or do we do it anyway.

I wish you the best of luck on your endeavours.

 

[ZF Lee]

Go and check out Atomic Habits by James Clear.

It has probably the closest step-by-step framework I know on building up positive habits...or even eliminating bad habits
in reverse.

One of the major takeaways I got from the book, was environment.
Here's an excerpt you can read: Motivation is Overvalued. Environment Often Matters More.

There are many stimuli/catalysts that 'trigger' habits, so best we can do is to control what triggers them for us.

In the case of your porn and TikTok, think about WHERE you usually turn them on.
In your bedroom? Your living room?

Then simply don't do your work there. Go to some other places like your school library to work.

Of course you can always find any anti-porn/anti-social media filter on the App Store.
But environment takes up more of the bigger picture for me.

 

[heavy_industry]

Has anyone else experienced this "Loop"? If so how did you break out of it?

You throw away all the bullshit that distracts you from living the life that you want to live.

And you also stop relying on "motivation" or other superficial emotions to determine what you will do. And instead, you develop a vision for your life, an inner drive, and sense of purpose.

If you start viewing yourself as being a "hard worker", you will no longer need motivation to be able to work. Working hard will become the default behavior.

 

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[Matt Lee]

Hey bro, have your life sucked enough that the "how" to breaking that loop is not even a question that comes to mind?

No real change will happen until it does. It doesn't matter how inspiring or motivating the replies you get are. The drive has to come from inside of you.

I know this because I used to ask the same question myself late at night. "How do I just do the work". "Why do I get demotivated". "Why am I doing this instead of working on the business".

The answer is: things are too easy. You're not really serious. You haven't felt shame or real regrets. You haven't considered where your life will be in a few years if you keep looping. Your life is too comfortable. You don't have a real desire to change. You want to be entertained more than you want to make progress. It doesn't hurt enough.

If you have to ask how you fix these things, you're not seeking advice that you don't already know. Chances are, all the reply from this thread is something you've read before or have seen in a video you've watched. Even my post here is not new.

Think of the dog howling in pain as he lays on the nail and refuses to get up. Can you honestly tell me you are not the same? You always have the choice to do so something about it.

You can bring up the conversation about addictions and cheap dopamine too. But those can be overcome if you make the choice to do so. It all starts with a desire and the decision that you can't do the same thing expecting different results.

So my friend you might be looking to procrastinate on the solutions you know already.

The truth you are looking for is there's no secret... there's no guide. You either break the loop because you need to or you don't. Either way, it's not gonna happen before you're ready.

So are you ready today? Tomorrow? When?

You should feel some pain as you read this so use that pain to make the choice to never disappoint yourself again.

 

[Saad Khan]

You're a feather in the wind, waiting for life to blow you from happy place to sad place, to happy place to sad place. When Andrew Tate said this, it clicked with me.

I can say many people suffer from this including me. I also question sometimes whether I'm driven by motivation or purpose.

There's one thing you can truly control. Your mind.

99% can't control their own minds, their thinking is done for them by the media.

Are you the 1%? If not, what steps are you taking / will you take to get there?

Based on you reply, I think you're on a spectrum of discipline in different areas of life.

And read atomic habits. Identify as who you want to be rather than who you are.

Identity change ---> Habits Change ----> Results Change.

 

[Kevin88660]

First i start of motivated, programming for 4hours, grinding, reading during school.

Suddenly, i start getting extremly unmotivated and i watch porn and scroll on tiktok for hours.


that leads to me getting motivated again and grinding.

and so and so...
- i dont think my discipline is the problem, i take cold shower everyday, exercise read etc..

Has anyone else experienced this "Loop"? If so how did you break out of it?
I dont wanna keep repeating this sine wave of high and low. Thanks in advance

You create rules for yourself. You have a designated 25 min tiktok time after 4 hours of work.

If you overshoot by one minute, there is a punishment..5 push-ups per minute. Slowly you will rewire your brain and body into compliance with your own orders.

There is no compliance without punishment.

You calculate what is your biological threshold for sustainable daily hustle and order your body to comply with it.

 

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[Beijing]

First i start of motivated, programming for 4hours, grinding, reading during school.

Who says that there is a problem?

Four hours of solid productivity is not bad for a day, especially if that is on top of going to school fulltime. Even being productive 4 hours straight on a regular basis without a boss leaning over your shoulder is hard -- most people can't do that. Many office workers working 8-10 shifts at a desk really only put in 4-5 hours of actual productive work per day. I would know. I'm typing this up at my desk at work right now.

Everyone has an upper limit to the average amount of concentration they have in the hopper each day. If your daily limit right now is four hours (after you've put energy into the other things you might need to do, such as school or a part-time job), that could mean 20+ hours of high-quality productivity every week. That's huge!

Just about all progress tends to be incremental. You don't get to a daily average of 8 hours of concentration for tasks that require your full attention by beating yourself up about having a daily average of 4 hours of concentration. You get there by gradually bumping that daily average up to 4.5 hours and then 5.0 hours and so on.

If you're using your time for productive things, eventually the positive feedback will kick in when you see the results from how much you have accomplished over time. It did for me. I started with 1-2 hours a day 4-5 days a week of work on my own business/product. Over six months, I bumped that up a little at a time until I could routinely do 3-4 hours days when I had to work my day job as well and 4-6 hours on days when I was free.

I got there by being proud of the progress I was making with 1-2 hours a day and not being angry at myself for not having the motivation to put more time in each day.

Right now I can still only do about 4-5 hours if I'm working on something that is really brain numbing. When I know I just don't have the concentration left to continue being productive, I stop for the day, and get myself ready to be as productive as possible the next day by resting, exercising and spending time doing things that I enjoy.

Is this inspiring? No, of course not. There are people out there who can grind 12 hours a day every day and never lose the ability to focus. That's not me, so I focus on doing what I can to the best of my ability and make the most of it by prioritizing quality over quantity.

If you're younger, it might be some time before you determine exactly how much you are capable of. You may discover that with time, you can indeed grind for 12 hours a day with nothing more than sheer willpower.

But if you're not able to do that, figure out what you can do and then achieve as much as you can with that. However, never allow yourself to be unhappy with where you are now and what you're able to accomplish right now. Four hours of productivity in a stretch on a regular basis is plenty to be proud of already (you're way ahead of most people), so take some satisfaction in that and see if you can bump a typical day up to 4.5 hours of productivity next.

 

[Yayu]

Yeah, I don't see a problem. Your brain needs a rest. It needs some process time. Some days you'll have the motivation to work long hours, other days you wont. Listen to and trust your brain.

 

[srodrigo]

- i dont think my discipline is the problem, i take cold shower everyday, exercise read etc..

Hilarious. The cold shower bros did a good job bullshitting so many dudes. Out of curiosity, do you leave in a country where it's like negative in winter too? I always wonder how productive people in Siberia are when they get ill after a cold shower in February.

I'm not sure how reading is related to discipline either. You should only be reading either MJ's books or whatever solves the next problem you are facing. Anything else is either leisure reading or action faking. Signed: An long time action faker.

The only one that I think you got right is exercise.

 

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[Brandonistaken]

First i start of motivated, programming for 4hours, grinding, reading during school.

Suddenly, i start getting extremly unmotivated and i watch porn and scroll on tiktok for hours.


that leads to me getting motivated again and grinding.

and so and so...
- i dont think my discipline is the problem, i take cold shower everyday, exercise read etc..

Has anyone else experienced this "Loop"? If so how did you break out of it?
I dont wanna keep repeating this sine wave of high and low. Thanks in advance

Questions you need to ask yourself

1. What is my diet?

2. What kind of environment am i in?

3. Who am i surrounded by?

4. Who are my social circle?

There is many more you can add on top but you need to control your mindset and to me it seems your mindset is weak. i suggest you read the book call Pyscho Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz

One thing your doing great already is exercise but i wouldn't recommend taking cold showers every single day unless its very very hot temperature.

 

[rjdgreat]

Suddenly, i start getting extremly unmotivated and i watch porn and scroll on tiktok for hours.

Has anyone else experienced this "Loop"? If so how did you break out of it?
I dont wanna keep repeating this sine wave of high and low. Thanks in advance

Listen hard on this brother, I am a porn addict since the day my dick got circumsized and I stop watching porn when my life gets shittier and shittier as the "loop" you called keeps going on. What you called "loop" is a chain that will bind you to keep jerking and watching porn if you don't stop it right now while the chain is weak and short. What I've learned is that your mind get F*cked very hard like the women you've watched on porn site/s and will destroy your dopamine receptor by jerking on that pixelated videos of women you've watched. You cannot break that unless you've felt the pain it's causing you. And you can't do it alone, you need Jesus Christ to help you break away that chain.

I hope you get to break that chain.

God bless you.