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HELP: Young Entrepreneur Went From Nothing to Marketer in 4 Months Yet STUCK in a Mental Plateau

hatedsalesrep

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Do you ever make progress yet feel like you are running circles in life?

I had nothing. No knowledge of technical skills, could at most get a server job, believed school was everything, was extremely depressed and all I wanted was to be rich and get laid. I would come home from school, and would lay down and not leave my house for up to 2 weeks. In that time I would binge watch all kinds of shows, binge eat, disconnect completely from family and friends whilst telling everyone that I was "busy" or "at work".

I was so ashamed of people finding out who I was. People finding out I was honestly depressed. I was skipping classes. I got a 0.5 gpa that semester, while parents praised me for being extremely smart and a "straight A student!!"...right. Girlfriends? No chance. I hated women probably because of my own lack of them.

Fast forward 4 months, I got a job with a tech company next to the CEO doing digital marketing, feel at peace with myself(most days), am extremely happy, have a desire to make an impact in the world. I do still over eat but nothing like before. I am focused, passionate, have no issues being around girls, and most importantly being myself. I always feel at ease talking to people because I know I am always myself. People say that I have a "Radient" aura around me. Even myself, sometimes, look back and see that person as someone else. It's like I died and was reborn.

I am realizing that what I truly love is the sales aspect of marketing. I love "meetings". I love talking to people. I love the psychology of negotiating. I love neuroscience and how the brain works. I love creating things that influences people to take action. I also love technology and how its revolutionizing the way we think and live and I would love to be a part of that(neurotechnology). I like changing business cultures from generic to visionary. That is what gets me excited. I see so many people with different skills and achievements that if they focused on that could make a KILLING doing what they love.

However, today is one of my "I want to give up" days. I have read all these books on starting a business, spirituality, self-improvement, technical books(on actual skills). I also meditate daily, listen to podcasts, and audiobooks. As I was batching up some videos for YouTube and for my website so that people can learn some digital marketing skills, while creating my sales funnels that's when I hit the floor.
Am I supposed to write my own ebook to give out for free? Why would anyone pay me alot of money to help them when I've just been doing this for 5 months? Can't people just go on YouTube and spend some time to learn this stuff?

Worst of all, having you guys read the initial story, my biggest question..How can I sell someone digital marketing services for their brand when I have trouble building my own?

I am learning all different aspects of a business from marketing, sales, web design, copywriting, technical know hows, but I am no master at any of them. I feel like I can give someone intermediate advice on ALL of them but not extremely advanced "master" status answers.

I've tried doing freelance for digital marketing and that's when I realized my current lack of skills Most of the jobs I saw I could honestly NOT do. Sometimes I tend to worry even for my current job because I feel as if the boss will see right through my insecurity.

What really pisses me off the MOST though is the fact I feel this way. I've been meditating, reading self-improvement, doing this, doing that, haven't watched TV in ages, haven't gone out in ages..Just learning and practicing yet here I am still struggling with the same F*cking inner devils. It makes me feel incompetent.

Thanks for reading this. I know this is just the day and tomorrow I will wake up ready to grind and motivated but its moments like this where I feel that criticisms and advice are most helpful.

P.S- Sorry if this is all over the place. I was writing all over the place as I typed. Also I've never said this before but I realize if I want honest answers, I need to be honest with everyone.
 
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