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Alex Alex 22

New Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Apr 8, 2020
Portsmouth UK
Hey, Alex here and here is my intro/story/drama:

I am almost 30 and broke. :) sounds promising so far - LOL -
It seems that COVID-19 shows me how much I lack the skill of money management. At the moment I live in the UK, since 2014 when I left Romania, my birth country. I fought by the hook and crook to get myself to a relative stable equilibrium and live a decent life. But it never pans out as I dream of it.

First, I was trained in Romania as a nurse, and I was dreaming to work as a nurse in the emergency system in the UK. Well, everything was good till the English exam which you have to prove some skills. It's not impossible but after 7 attempts I still couldn't reach the minimum score at the writing part (if you are familiar with IELTS, I need it 6.5 in writing and score only 6). I thought that it may be a problem with my handwriting or come up with various excuses. But I notice that even when I was taking private classes, I had no desire to do my homework or to work myself out and do alt least 2-3 essays. Then I realise that this is not for me. I have no drive or desire to become a nurse. I know that there is something more for me out there. The problem is where to start?
There is so much information out there this days that, I just go into a freeze mode and crawl back to bed, not knowing where to start from.

So far I worked as a delivery driver, in a recycle factory for a couple of days, kebab and burger shops, lorry driver and last taxi driver - a job which drains my credit cards and left me out of work due to COVID-19.
So now I am waiting to start a new job as a parcel delivery driver for Amazon, and my credit cards are running from red to black. Thanks to the landlord, which understands the situation and didn't throw me out when I told him that I cannot afford the rent this month. I am ashamed.
All these years, I have taken a £ 10.000 loan which I spend it in 10 days then pay for it for 5 years. Savings? - I could never pass £ 1000 in savings. Always there was something happening or a possibility to invest in books, audiobooks, clothes, help parents.
I was doing ok money on truck driving but after 2 years of working nights and having no social life and one failed dropshipping test business, I decided to switch jobs to become a taxi driver. All good for the first month, then the shock/ advantage to become self-employed. I saw that you need a lot of discipline to create a regular schedule and to work 6-7 days a week to pay for the car and have some money left over for yourself. So I start to use more and more credit cards, till I reach the bottom on 2 of them. Then the salvation from my bank -another credit card with even a higher limit. - awsome ! F*ck it- it's on the limit in less than 2 months spending £ 3000. Why? well, all the taxi industry is f*cked up, especially here in Portsmouth where the octopus mafia company is doing a citizen favour on the back of drivers by keeping the tariff at the lowest possible. Everything is more expensive in the south of England, except taxis. I had people laughing at me when I asked them for £ 10 after a 30 min journey.
Nevermind, I kept reading and listening to over 200 books on self-development, spirituality and finances. I got good results in discipline my mind regarding the nutrition and information intake, I do exercise daily (gym- running - callisthenics ), meditate 1 hour every day, cooking, journaling, but I still f*cked up financially.
My folks have done everything they could to offer me a better future and I was responsible for nothing for more than 20 years. Now, waking up in this jungle, I am wondering how to survive and I am full of pain and bitter knowing that I disappoint my parents and that I can do nothing to help them at the moment.
I'm a snowflake... I know.
"You have to find your life purpose and work it from there...." yeah, you go and find your F*cking purpose when you are waiting for a call just to get work so you can pay the bills.
"You have to find a mentor" ... like I can find mentor just on the street -hey can you put me on track and show me how to manage myself?
All I could see in the past 2 weeks is a more prevalent thought of suicide- like I reach the end. I have no vision. I cannot visualise anything. I tried to find a job as a salesman and penetrate the corporate market while learning sales and marketing but not so many chances when all your background is in driving and you are almost 30.
So where should I start?
Thank you @MJ DeMarco for creating this platform and provide the valuable information in your books.
Looking forward to save myself in order to save the world ;)



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