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INTRO Hello FastLaners! Here's the short version of my story.

Bennu

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Apr 19, 2018
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Howdy folks! I'm a 48 year old who spent most of my life being lazy, fat, broke, depressed, and unhealthy in every way. I had ideals instead of plans. I hit bottom more than once.

About a year ago I started to make some positive changes, one at a time. I'm diabetic, so I did a trial and error with different diets until I found the most effective one. For me, it happened to be plant-based. Yes, I miss the hell out of bacon cheeseburgers, but I'd rather keep my feet.

I started gradually distancing myself from toxic people in my life, including going no-contact with my father who is a narcissist slow-laner who thinks becoming an accountant like him is the only path to a good life. He retired at 65 having paid himself first like a good boy, but ended up with bad health and alcoholism and went into a massive depression when he no longer had a purpose (work for retirement). I had a lot of friends who I'd known for 30 years that I got away from because they waste their lives in negativity and hated seeing me change for the better.

I weaned myself off of debating on social media and am now only using it for marketing.

I spent most of my life wondering what the hell to do with my life.

Two months ago I started exercising for 15 minutes every morning. That has had profound changes in my mental clarity, physical energy, confidence, and so many other factors. I think that one decision was one of the most important I've made.

When I realized I could do that, I decided that I was going to upgrade every aspect of my life: physical, mental, emotional, and financial. I read The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*ck and that was a huge life changer. It taught me how entitled and victimized I was being, and taught me to take responsibility for everything about myself and my life.

I read Rich Dad Poor Dad and it gave me a couple of good core ideas, specifically about knowing the difference between an asset and a liability.

Then I picked up Millionaire Fastlane and it permanently rewired my thinking! I just finished it and I'm finally coming up with ideas that I believe are workable and fit CENTS well. I feel invigorated and excited and am already taking action to make things happen. I have a site up, I'm writing like mad, I'm learning SEO, HTML, CSS, jQuery, Swift, and recently switched to Linux Mint because a Windows update destroyed months of writing (my fault for not backing it up, but they proved I can't trust their OS anymore, either).

I know I'm late to the game, but not so late that I can't turn things around. Thank you, MJ, for sharing your knowledge! You're saving my a$$! Or rather, empowering me with the knowledge to save my own! I'm gonna go dig into Unscripted now!
 

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MJ DeMarco

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Welcome and congrats on finding your way, with diet, purpose, and more.
 

castr131

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Mar 28, 2018
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Welcome to the forum!
Perfect example of being able to turn your life around, regardless of how "late" you think you are.
 

Late Bloomer

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Apr 17, 2018
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Hi Bennu, I admire your honesty, courage and dedication!

Yes, I miss the hell out of bacon cheeseburgers, but I'd rather keep my feet.
That is one of the most powerful one-liner statements I have EVER read. Seems that it would be an incredibly compelling headline for any diabetic product.

I started gradually distancing myself from toxic people in my life, including going no-contact with my father who is a narcissist slow-laner
Although the majority of the participants are far younger than we are, I recommend the Reddit forum "raised by narcissists" for lots of insight and other people's experiences dealing with narcissistic parents.

I weaned myself off of debating on social media and am now only using it for marketing.
It sure can be addictive to try to show people who don't matter to your life, how wrong they are, can't it! I had to break that addiction too.

When I realized I could do that, I decided that I was going to upgrade every aspect of my life: physical, mental, emotional, and financial.
Have you seen the concept of evaluating each area on a 1 to 10 scale, going out like spokes, to see how "the wheel of your life" is doing?

I read Rich Dad Poor Dad and it gave me a couple of good core ideas, specifically about knowing the difference between an asset and a liability.
I think Rich Dad totally rocks as a book to help us question the scripts that we picked up in this society. I also thinks it totally sucks as a guide to what to do next!

Then I picked up Millionaire Fastlane and it permanently rewired my thinking! .... I'm learning SEO, HTML, CSS, jQuery, Swift, and recently switched to Linux Mint because a Windows update destroyed months of writing (my fault for not backing it up, but they proved I can't trust their OS anymore, either).
Cool! Is your background in coding and technology, or is all of this new to you?

I just switched to MXLinux, enjoying it a lot.
 
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Bennu

Bennu

Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Apr 19, 2018
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Hi Bennu, I admire your honesty, courage and dedication!



That is one of the most powerful one-liner statements I have EVER read. Seems that it would be an incredibly compelling headline for any diabetic product.



Although the majority of the participants are far younger than we are, I recommend the Reddit forum "raised by narcissists" for lots of insight and other people's experiences dealing with narcissistic parents.



It sure can be addictive to try to show people who don't matter to your life, how wrong they are, can't it! I had to break that addiction too.



Have you seen the concept of evaluating each area on a 1 to 10 scale, going out like spokes, to see how "the wheel of your life" is doing?



I think Rich Dad totally rocks as a book to help us question the scripts that we picked up in this society. I also thinks it totally sucks as a guide to what to do next!



Cool! Is your background in coding and technology, or is all of this new to you?

I just switched to MXLinux, enjoying it a lot.
Thanks much for your reply!
Well, one of my ideas is to create a diabetic diet book and lifestyle guide. Already writing.

The r/raisedbynarcissists subreddit is something I've been on for a few years. I try to help other people who are conflicted about separating from toxic people.

I'd love more info on that wheel of life process!

My background is in tech support, but not programming. I know some HTML. However, since I posted, I've found that I've spent my spare time writing like mad and learning SEO. I'm going with that and learning self-publishing, writing copy that sells, book marketing, and other skills and have a book in the works, as well as a few others on the back burner which will follow. I'll be creating a system/process for life improvement, doing a premium content portion of my site, etc. Been working like mad on all of this and I'm excited to learn so much and finally have a sense of purpose!
 

John Franklin

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Dec 3, 2017
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Welcome Bennu! Keep up the great work.
 

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Late Bloomer

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Apr 17, 2018
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I'd love more info on that wheel of life process!
It's pretty simple. You pick a few basic categories of life, such as health, family and relationships, work, etc.... the areas that matter most to you.

On each of these categories, rate your current life from 1 to 10.

Then do a polar plot. Put all the 1's in the middle of a circle. Draw spokes radiating out for each of these areas, each of them a number line from 1 at the center to 10 at the outer rim. Now, connect the dots. If you have a well balanced life, you'll have a nice round wheel of life. If one area's way underdeveloped, you'll have a bumpy ride... or at least, that's the metaphor.

Here's an example I picked at random from an image search.
 
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Bennu

Bennu

Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Apr 19, 2018
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An update. I've been gone for a bit. I didn't give up! I've been busy as hell! I read up on self publishing and am writing a book in earnest! I have four chapters done in three days! The words are flowing like mad. I feel like Geoffrey Rush in Quills. The plan is to have the rough draft done in about a month, and I'm already about 4 days ahead of schedule! Another 3-4 weeks for editing and getting a cover done, and a month for marketing and pre-launch buzz.

Between bouts of writing, I'm reading Unscripted, which is kind of tripping me out. I'll write a chapter, and then the next chapter I read in Unscripted seems to mirror it a fair amount. My life's journey seems to be similar to MJ's in some ways. I totally identified with the Santa thing. A quick story:

I was about the same age as MJ when I found out Santa wasn't real. When I was with my dad at a mall, there was a mall Santa. I saw a long line of kids waiting to sit on his lap and tell him what they wanted for Christmas. Something took over inside me and I started shouting to my fellow deceived children, "Santa's not real! That's just a guy in a costume! It's our parents! They're the ones who put the presents under the tree! THEY'RE LYING TO US ALL!!!" I got in so much trouble. That's when I learned that we're supposed to accept certain lies. But I just never could seem to.

Welp, back to it!
 

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