Feedback needed please

[LeoK]

So I wrote a short ebook (attached) and built a website (Easiest Million Dollars).
I am trying to get myself out of a sticky situation and thought I'd put some of what I learned from the millionaire fast lane into practice.

I'd love any feedback (good or bad).
Thanks in advance

 

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[Eleven]

What's the point of this? Is it meant to be a joke? Seems that way from the few pages of the ebook I looked at.

 

[LeoK]

What's the point of this? Is it meant to be a joke? Seems that way from the few pages of the ebook I looked at.

Yes there is humor in the book. If you read it to the end you will see that it also has useful wisdom too (hopefully that adds massive value).

I guess I find it ironic that it is possible to make a million dollars by telling other people how they can make a million dollars

 

[Eleven]

I guess I find it ironic that it is possible to make a million dollars by telling other people how they can make a million dollars

I get that. I find this humorous, but it's not something I would pay for. Not even $1.

If it's something you're really looking to make money with, why not offer serious advice based on what you've learned?

Or if you are trying to go a funny angle, perhaps be upfront about that. Probably less likely people pay for something like that, but who knows?

 

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[LeoK]

I get that. I find this humorous, but it's not something I would pay for. Not even $1.

If it's something you're really looking to make money with, why not offer serious advice based on what you've learned?

Or if you are trying to go a funny angle, perhaps be upfront about that. Probably less likely people pay for something like that, but who knows?

This is an experiment for me... I am trying to work out what value I can bring to the market place. If you read from Chapter 7 to the end that is serious advice and what I have learned. But I am not sure if the world needs this or how to market it.
Hopefully I can learn from some of the people who have broken through these barriers

 

[Real Deal Denver]

I read it, and I also looked at your website. I liked the book, but hated the website. The book was fun and ingenious. The website has a rank odor to it - way too commercialized.

I think your book could do well in the right setting. I'd buy it as a gift for a buck. I think a gift shop, or as on on counter impulse purchase would serve you well. It's hard to argue with what you say in the book. And the price is right, especially compared to a simple card that says miss you, get well, or whatever. In that perspective, this is golden. It depends on how you look at it. I can see people thinking they've been ripped off, and I can also see people appreciating the content for only a buck.

All in all, I liked it. Especially the monkey story. But to be successful, it has to be presented in the right context. Good luck ~

 

[LeoK]

I read it, and I also looked at your website. I liked the book, but hated the website. The book was fun and ingenious. The website has a rank odor to it - way too commercialized.

I think your book could do well in the right setting. I'd buy it as a gift for a buck. I think a gift shop, or as on on counter impulse purchase would serve you well. It's hard to argue with what you say in the book. And the price is right, especially compared to a simple card that says miss you, get well, or whatever. In that perspective, this is golden. It depends on how you look at it. I can see people thinking they've been ripped off, and I can also see people appreciating the content for only a buck.

All in all, I liked it. Especially the monkey story. But to be successful, it has to be presented in the right context. Good luck ~

That is some great feedback thank you so much

 

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[Eleven]

But I am not sure if the world needs this or how to market it.

This is the important part. I'm wondering: who is your target buyer for something like this? Definitely worth thinking about.

I will also say that while I think parts of the book was interesting, I really had no idea what it was about from your website. Honestly, the website looked sorta scammy to me.

 

[Real Deal Denver]

This is the important part. I'm wondering: who is your target buyer for something like this? Definitely worth thinking about.

I will also say that while I think parts of the book was interesting, I really had no idea what it was about from your website. Honestly, the website looked sorta scammy to me.

Yep - definitely burn the website. Scammy/scummy - I think that nails it.

 

[LeoK]

This is the important part. I'm wondering: who is your target buyer for something like this? Definitely worth thinking about.

I will also say that while I think parts of the book was interesting, I really had no idea what it was about from your website. Honestly, the website looked sorta scammy to me.

Ok I agree the website needs to change. Easily done... I will work on that. I will try a far more authentic approach. Perhaps a video explaining everything? So I admitted in the book I used to be the guy that fell for scams etc. I am trying to turn things around for me and I want to try to lead by example for people who may have experienced some of the stuff I went through.

I thought because I fell for scams anyone who bought from this site would be my ideal customer

 

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[meridian_blue]

To be frank, it seems odd to me to read a book about becoming wealthy by someone who hasn't become wealthy themselves. Some people succeed at writing such books, but people are overwhelmingly skeptical at taking their advice. It would be the equivalent of reading the TMF before DeMarco started his own business.

Your introduction states that you were a springboard and platform diver, and that you have become an International Trampoline coach in Australia and New Zealand. It also states that you are currently training athletes that are "some of the top in Australia and are amongst the best in the world".

THAT sounds to me far more interesting, and a way more specialized niche that you could excel in. Present what you have learned as a coach and as a former athlete, and tailor it to this field and I think you would do a lot better in the e-book space. Just my 2 cents.

 

[LeoK]

To be frank, it seems odd to me to read a book about becoming wealthy by someone who hasn't become wealthy themselves. Some people succeed at writing such books, but people are overwhelmingly skeptical at taking their advice. It would be the equivalent of reading the TMF before DeMarco started his own business.

Your introduction states that you were a springboard and platform diver, and that you have become an International Trampoline coach in Australia and New Zealand. It also states that you are currently training athletes that are "some of the top in Australia and are amongst the best in the world".

THAT sounds to me far more interesting, and a way more specialized niche that you could excel in. Present what you have learned as a coach and as a former athlete, and tailor it to this field and I think you would do a lot better in the e-book space. Just my 2 cents.

Yes correct, they are far more specialised niches, which I am arguably very successful and already excelling in. I have published many coaching manuals and am currently on track for getting one of my athletes to the Olympic Games in 2020. Considering the percentage of people who ever perform at this level I am in the top 1%.

However, I am also considering big life questions such as "what does life look like after coaching?" are there any skills I have learned which are transferable to other industries?
In my Trampoline "job" it is life in the slowlane and it is a slowlane industry. I am 100% aware of where I am and I am aware of where I want to be.

This is part of the process of growing, I am experimenting, I am learning and hopefully I will get to learn from people who have already been through some of the challenges I have yet to face. Hence being on this forum

 

[LeoK]

So I took your advice @Real Deal Denver and @Eleven and completely overhauled the website Easiest Million Dollars.
I'd love to know if you think this looks better? I also edited the eBook and took out the bit about me

 

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[A. Rodriguez]

Looks nice although I never saw the earlier version of the website.

Price conveys the value of a product. At $1, some people might probably think the product is worthless despite the massive amount of value in the material.

Let the price convey the actual value of the product. Kudos for trying.

 

[LeoK]

Looks nice although I never saw the earlier version of the website.

Price conveys the value of a product. At $1, some people might probably think the product is worthless despite the massive amount of value in the material.

Let the price convey the actual value of the product. Kudos for trying.

Thanks for the feedback. This is my thinking. $1 for some people is nothing and yet for others it could be a weeks wage. I do not want to exclude people from having the information because of their circumstances... I would give it away for free but people do not value things that are free

 

[Real Deal Denver]

So I took your advice @Real Deal Denver and @Eleven and completely overhauled the website Easiest Million Dollars.
I'd love to know if you think this looks better? I also edited the eBook and took out the bit about me

Short, sweet, and clean. Love it.

Personally, I wouldn't offer a refund. It's just not worth the hassle. There are going to be sour pusses out there that will spend two bucks on a get well card, but can't appreciate your card for a lousy buck. Let them worry about it. Life is short. You're not ripping them off, although they will say that you are. There's a word for people like that. Losers. Scrape em off and continue on your way!

 

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[LeoK]

Short, sweet, and clean. Love it.

Personally, I wouldn't offer a refund. It's just not worth the hassle. There are going to be sour pusses out there that will spend two bucks on a get well card, but can't appreciate your card for a lousy buck. Let them worry about it. Life is short. You're not ripping them off, although they will say that you are. There's a word for people like that. Losers. Scrape em off and continue on your way!

Thanks for the compliments and advice. I have gotten rid of the refund offer. Now I need to work out how to find customers

 

[Real Deal Denver]

Thanks for the compliments and advice. I have gotten rid of the refund offer. Now I need to work out how to find customers

I have an assortment of cute tricks that I use at bars for a drink. I show someone the trick - they smile, and gain it for themselves to use someday - and buy me a drink. Am I ripping them off? No - I'm trading a moment or two of happiness and wonder, for a drink. Even though drinks are a lot more than a buck, it sounds like a fair trade to me!

Glad you got rid of the guarantee.

You've done the hard part. The rest is all downhill. Good luck ~

 

[GMSI7D]

to be honest, i don't like your website

when we land on it, we see you and a message wich is basicaly telling us:

" hey you the reader, i have a good deal for you, just give me 1 buck and here's an ebook, don't tell anyone . have a nice day"

it sounds like a dealer in the street like i see everyday in my town:

" hey you, please stop, i have this thing for your. it is just one dollar , buy it "

so it sounds too aggressive for me

i don't want to deal in the street.

 

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[Jade.backer]

the new version is much better than the previous one.

 

[LeoK]

to be honest, i don't like your website

when we land on it, we see you and a message wich is basicaly telling us:

" hey you the reader, i have a good deal for you, just give me 1 buck and here's an ebook, don't tell anyone . have a nice day"

it sounds like a dealer in the street like i see everyday in my town:

" hey you, please stop, i have this thing for your. it is just one dollar , buy it "

so it sounds too aggressive for me

i don't want to deal in the street.

I am here to learn. How could I do this better in your opinion?

 

[LeoK]

the new version is much better than the previous one.

Thanks. Always open to suggestions for improvements

 

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[Hylle]

I would never pay someone to teach me French who doesn't speak French themselves. Or pay someone to teach me how to earn money in stocks when they earn money selling books about earning money from stocks.

 

[Eleven]

So I took your advice @Real Deal Denver and @Eleven and completely overhauled the website Easiest Million Dollars.
I'd love to know if you think this looks better? I also edited the eBook and took out the bit about me

I agree that the new site looks better. Definitely more trustworthy. The copy could still use some work IMO, but it looks like a legit site now. Nicely done

 

[Scot]

Ok what am I actually looking at here?

Because this looks like the definition of Paradox of Pracfice.

Your website looks sketchy and the CTA button takes me straight to my paypal account with zero heads up. I back buttoned the hell out of that.

Am I missing something here or are you literally the guru character from Millionaire Fastlane ..?

 

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[Argue]

Hey @LeoK,

I want to share my feedback.

1. Bad contrast in the logo. Your website/book is about money. Your color choices need to reflect that.

2. Your visual hierarchy is poor. Why are you the main attention on the site? Remove your picture as the heading. Instead, add it to the footer, aside.

3. Weak copy here. Your header is not too clear. And you poorly made the mistake adding paragraphs in the header section. The paragraphs belong in the body section, not the call to action area.

4. Navigation needs work. Remove free stuff, and remove "Why Leo?" You're confusing your reader.

5. Get a copy of what? This button is not clear. Remove it. Also, don't use yellow. Use green or orange for a dynamic feel.

6. Why are these news outlets here? Is this social proof? Again, this part of the website is unnecessary. It's random, unclear, and doesn't tell a story.

1. The logo is simple. A cash icon before the text. White color font for contrast.

2. The navigation is to the point. However, the key here is the shopping kart. Draws attention. Let's the user know there's something of value.

3. The header includes an image of money with an overlay. Money is our theme. The header copy needs to explain your book offer in a short, clear sentence.

4. The call to action button is orange. The button will link to more information about the book or an email opt-in.

5. In the body section, tell a story about your book. Encourage the visitor with optimism and hope. Sell the desire they crave.

6. Right before the footer, include information about yourself. Also add an image with a link to your book. Use text that is bold and states the price of the book. Get creative here.

7. Lastly, link your website to your social pages. Encourage your visitor to like your posts etc for free giveaways, etc.

End Note:

My feedback should get you started on improving your site. I created that mockup in 30 minutes, to get my ideas down. My design is not the best or most desirable. However, the mockup illustrates what structure you need to follow.


I hope this helps!

 

[LeoK]

Hey @LeoK,

I want to share my feedback.

1. Bad contrast in the logo. Your website/book is about money. Your color choices need to reflect that.

2. Your visual hierarchy is poor. Why are you the main attention on the site? Remove your picture as the heading. Instead, add it to the footer, aside.

3. Weak copy here. Your header is not too clear. And you poorly made the mistake adding paragraphs in the header section. The paragraphs belong in the body section, not the call to action area.

4. Navigation needs work. Remove free stuff, and remove "Why Leo?" You're confusing your reader.

5. Get a copy of what? This button is not clear. Remove it. Also, don't use yellow. Use green or orange for a dynamic feel.

6. Why are these news outlets here? Is this social proof? Again, this part of the website is unnecessary. It's random, unclear, and doesn't tell a story.

1. The logo is simple. A cash icon before the text. White color font for contrast.

2. The navigation is to the point. However, the key here is the shopping kart. Draws attention. Let's the user know there's something of value.

3. The header includes an image of money with an overlay. Money is our theme. The header copy needs to explain your book offer in a short, clear sentence.

4. The call to action button is orange. The button will link to more information about the book or an email opt-in.

5. In the body section, tell a story about your book. Encourage the visitor with optimism and hope. Sell the desire they crave.

6. Right before the footer, include information about yourself. Also add an image with a link to your book. Use text that is bold and states the price of the book. Get creative here.

7. Lastly, link your website to your social pages. Encourage your visitor to like your posts etc for free giveaways, etc.

End Note:

My feedback should get you started on improving your site. I created that mockup in 30 minutes, to get my ideas down. My design is not the best or most desirable. However, the mockup illustrates what structure you need to follow.


I hope this helps!

Sorry for the delayed response. Thanks so much for the ideas of how to improve the site etc. I have taken on board everything you have said and completely re-designed the whole site as per your recommendations. What do you think?

I have also tried to simplify the message of what I am trying to achieve with the site. It's been a huge undertaking given that I have done this around my full time job which is upwards of 60 hours a week.

 

[Dunkafelics]

When I hit your first page, there is a video that you can watch. What if I don't want to watch it? You need to have text on the first page that can catch the reader's attention or they will leave. They will not click your other pages within the header.

I didn't see the actual product... until I looked at the product page. Then I saw the bullet points you made explaining the book. First one about making a trillion dollars within a few weeks? Dig deep and find other ways that you can connect with a potential reader. These points are just scratching the surface.

 

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[LeoK]

When I hit your first page, there is a video that you can watch. What if I don't want to watch it? You need to have text on the first page that can catch the reader's attention or they will leave. They will not click your other pages within the header.

I didn't see the actual product... until I looked at the product page. Then I saw the bullet points you made explaining the book. First one about making a trillion dollars within a few weeks? Dig deep and find other ways that you can connect with a potential reader. These points are just scratching the surface.

Hey @Dunkafelics, What video? There is no video on the site?

 

[Daniel...D]

I get that. I find this humorous, but it's not something I would pay for. Not even $1.

If it's something you're really looking to make money with, why not offer serious advice based on what you've learned?

Or if you are trying to go a funny angle, perhaps be upfront about that. Probably less likely people pay for something like that, but who knows?

Do not be so strict, I think this is the first attempt to write something like that