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TL;DR: Last year I changed environments from New Jersey to Georgia, started a business, failed, came back home with my tail between my legs. I'm living a normal life and my parents are happy. I've increased my discipline and wisdom after making money in a kinda fastlane way (flipping cars), the desire to be a fastlane entrepreneur has never left me. I want to leave to Utah, get a studio apartment and use my programming skills to develop SaaS products. Can you help me make the decision to stay or to go?
Last year, I made a depressing post, detailing one of my lowest moments in life and in business.
After making this post I wrestled with my negative thoughts, a drop in confidence, and the reluctant acceptance that I just wan't good enough to make a business and become a fastlane millionaire.
The year progresses and I give into the slowlane.
At least my parents are happy...
I'm back my hometown reminded of the version of me that I hate. I'm back in school, living a life I don't want.
I get on the dean's list.
I've always been a really good student and if I get a degree I'll have a comfortable job as a software developer like a good boy...
yay...
There's something in me that doesn't want to go through this path.
This summer I taught myself how to buy, fix, and flip cars and made some good money. Not a crazy amount, but it's impressive considering that I never worked on cars before and that this was the first time I ever made any money outside of a normal job.
Three days ago, I was awake for 48 hours because of some health issue. In this hyper emotional state I admit to myself that I hate my life here in New Jersey. I notice that EVERYTIME my emotions get high, my mind thinks about the possibility of moving out and defining my own life because I hate it here.
I hate that I'm typing with cold fingers right now, I hate that my last (no longer) friend turned out to be untrustworthy (he cheated with another friends girlfriend), I hate that I have to drive fight traffic for 30 minutes, attend classes where not even the teachers care and everyone cheats, and then fight traffic coming back, I hate the feeling of purposelessness that I feel everyday putting on this front for my parents... There's so much more but you get the point.
I spent the last three days writing in a notion document, weighing whether moving out would be a wise choice or not. Whether I'm capable of living life on my own or will I just give up when it gets hard again and cry back to my mommy.
I've asked myself hard questions.
Questions like:
- Why do I even trust MJ DeMarco?
- Why do I think I'm even capable of becoming a successful fastlaner?
- Am I just a lazy fool who wants to move out to avoid his schooling?
- What is going to make this move to Utah any different than your move to Georgia?
- What will your parents think since I was the one who told them I'd finish college and go through the slowlane machine?
- Won't I just spend all my money like a fool?
- SO many more questions...
Most answers give me a green light to move...
- I do trust MJ DeMarco because (1) his advice is logically true and timeless, he isn't pedaling get rich quick programs (2) he has successfully grown his businesses because of the principles he teaches (3) other successful men point to MJ DeMarco's wisdom as an ally in their journey to wealth.
- I am not a lazy fool because how am I lazy if I flipped cars, took a chance in Georgia, workout, keep a clean room, etc? Maybe I don't want to go through the school route, sure, but I am not lazy.
ETC. ETC.
But some questions/ concerns still don't have answers:
- I have something good going on here. I can easily get a Computer Science degree in two years with very little debt if I get serious and finish school. Why would it be a good idea to move out if you don't have the safety net of a degree to catch you? I'm not afraid of "normal jobs", I've worked them my whole life but wouldn't having a CS job in UTAH make everything easier?
- I would disgrace myself to my family. They only know me as "the F*ck up who took time off school to chase a crazy dream, but at least he's going back to school"
- I have no real savings right now. My car flipping money had to go towards life and school.
- I haven't proved to myself that I'm a capable business man yet.
I've also devised a plan if I were to leave.
I'd stay for this last semester (92 days) and in silence gather resources (money, discipline, etc) get rid of my attachments to New Jersey (like sell the last car I still have, someone is actually gonna come get it today at 3pm) get everything in order to move (like make sure my car can make the trip to Utah) etc etc
Can you offer me your advice on whether to stay or go?
Thanks for reading this far. ✅
EDIT: I'm not asking anyone to make a decision for me, I'm genuinely weighing out my options and would just like your opinion, if you'd be so kind to leave it
Last year, I made a depressing post, detailing one of my lowest moments in life and in business.
After making this post I wrestled with my negative thoughts, a drop in confidence, and the reluctant acceptance that I just wan't good enough to make a business and become a fastlane millionaire.
The year progresses and I give into the slowlane.
At least my parents are happy...
I'm back my hometown reminded of the version of me that I hate. I'm back in school, living a life I don't want.
I get on the dean's list.
I've always been a really good student and if I get a degree I'll have a comfortable job as a software developer like a good boy...
yay...
There's something in me that doesn't want to go through this path.
This summer I taught myself how to buy, fix, and flip cars and made some good money. Not a crazy amount, but it's impressive considering that I never worked on cars before and that this was the first time I ever made any money outside of a normal job.
Three days ago, I was awake for 48 hours because of some health issue. In this hyper emotional state I admit to myself that I hate my life here in New Jersey. I notice that EVERYTIME my emotions get high, my mind thinks about the possibility of moving out and defining my own life because I hate it here.
I hate that I'm typing with cold fingers right now, I hate that my last (no longer) friend turned out to be untrustworthy (he cheated with another friends girlfriend), I hate that I have to drive fight traffic for 30 minutes, attend classes where not even the teachers care and everyone cheats, and then fight traffic coming back, I hate the feeling of purposelessness that I feel everyday putting on this front for my parents... There's so much more but you get the point.
I spent the last three days writing in a notion document, weighing whether moving out would be a wise choice or not. Whether I'm capable of living life on my own or will I just give up when it gets hard again and cry back to my mommy.
I've asked myself hard questions.
Questions like:
- Why do I even trust MJ DeMarco?
- Why do I think I'm even capable of becoming a successful fastlaner?
- Am I just a lazy fool who wants to move out to avoid his schooling?
- What is going to make this move to Utah any different than your move to Georgia?
- What will your parents think since I was the one who told them I'd finish college and go through the slowlane machine?
- Won't I just spend all my money like a fool?
- SO many more questions...
Most answers give me a green light to move...
- I do trust MJ DeMarco because (1) his advice is logically true and timeless, he isn't pedaling get rich quick programs (2) he has successfully grown his businesses because of the principles he teaches (3) other successful men point to MJ DeMarco's wisdom as an ally in their journey to wealth.
- I am not a lazy fool because how am I lazy if I flipped cars, took a chance in Georgia, workout, keep a clean room, etc? Maybe I don't want to go through the school route, sure, but I am not lazy.
ETC. ETC.
But some questions/ concerns still don't have answers:
- I have something good going on here. I can easily get a Computer Science degree in two years with very little debt if I get serious and finish school. Why would it be a good idea to move out if you don't have the safety net of a degree to catch you? I'm not afraid of "normal jobs", I've worked them my whole life but wouldn't having a CS job in UTAH make everything easier?
- I would disgrace myself to my family. They only know me as "the F*ck up who took time off school to chase a crazy dream, but at least he's going back to school"
- I have no real savings right now. My car flipping money had to go towards life and school.
- I haven't proved to myself that I'm a capable business man yet.
I've also devised a plan if I were to leave.
I'd stay for this last semester (92 days) and in silence gather resources (money, discipline, etc) get rid of my attachments to New Jersey (like sell the last car I still have, someone is actually gonna come get it today at 3pm) get everything in order to move (like make sure my car can make the trip to Utah) etc etc
Can you offer me your advice on whether to stay or go?
Thanks for reading this far. ✅
EDIT: I'm not asking anyone to make a decision for me, I'm genuinely weighing out my options and would just like your opinion, if you'd be so kind to leave it
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