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HOT! Are 20-40 Years Old More Lonely Than Ever?

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I've been noticing this problem more and more often recently: people in their late twenties/early thirties are lonely and have very few friends. Perhaps it's only limited to me, my girlfriend, and some people I know so I wanted to post this thread and figure this out. Here are a few thoughts to offer more detail:
  • In my hometown, I have 0 friends with whom I meet up regularly. I had one friend until last year when his son was born. He had been telling me all the time that nothing would change when he would become a father (I never believed him) but now we talk only online. I think I saw him last time over six months ago. Before, we used to meet at least 2-3 times a week. My other friends who live in the same city have gone in a different direction in life and we don't really mesh that well anymore. We sometimes meet but usually I'm okay with just one meeting per 3 months or so.
  • My other friends are almost exclusively virtual. We talk online but we rarely meet (1-2 times a year) or never. It's still good to be able to talk online but it's not the same as doing fun stuff together regularly and being spontaneous (impossible since they all live between 2-5 hours by car from where I live).
  • Almost all our friends/people we know lack initiative. If I organize something, they will join but by themselves they almost never set up anything. This makes me feel that they don't really care much about the relationship. So in return, I don't put in that much effort anymore.
  • In the case of my girlfriend, her friends have so little time that their lives are limited to work, home (with their partner), and their dogs. And we're talking about young people who supposedly should enjoy their youth.
  • As sad as it is, unless I'm traveling or learning something new with a coach, this forum is usually the main way I interact with strangers. I do enjoy this but like I said above, I'd like to have some deep friendships with people I trust that share my values and are available to do fun stuff together. As it is now, whatever new things I do, I just hire a coach and sometimes he or she becomes my sort of friend.
  • Speaking of traveling, I've found that it's usually way easier to find like-minded people when visiting places that interest us and match our values. But these relationships have the same problem: they're almost exclusively virtual. So in the end it's nice when you're there but it sort of dies when you're not there (which is kind of understandable if it's a new relationship).
  • Curiously, we often see people way older than we are who enjoy rich social lives. Heck, I think that my parents may actually have more friends and a richer social life than I do even though they live in the countryside and rarely leave their homes lol.
What are your thoughts, experiences, suggestions, whatever else is on your mind?
 
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Mainstream7

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Totally agree. It becomes increasingly harder to find friends. Personally, I had to learn how to put out invitations.
There will be a premium for people who are able to make new friends in real life, as most people start conversations on social media.
But then again, online allows us to go beyond space and connect with the right people.

People are reacting only nowadays. They don't work on themselves anymore, they don't have a vision. So it's also hard to connect with those, because we work on ourselves. It's hard to find compatibility.

Another problem I see is that tech people are building our future. A lot of them are not social at all and don't know what it means to design better experiences for people. Their vision is almost always purely digital. It's good that we have service designers coming in here.

A good thing I see is that social circles still kinda exist right after school and during university, and then slowly fade, as work becomes precedent.

I think the pendulum will swing towards the digital to the extreme, and then swing back to the other extreme afterwards(real life experiences). This has happened in history many times with many different matters.

But it's to early.

People are slowly waking up though.
I think we have the responsibility to build a future that allows people to connect in a real way.
 

Tiago

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The focus of 2021 for me was to build community. I was deeply longing for it, and felt incredibly lonely.

Focusing on relationships has produced the greatest amount of joy in my life.

Nowadays, it's not unusual for me to have activities with friends from Wednesday all the way to Sunday.

I think that yes, people are generally being more flaky and more isolated, but many are having the same exact thoughts as you and I.

So it does take energy, time and resources to build a community, but once it gets going, it's life-changing.

EDIT:

Just for a few ideas, I'm currently running a men's group, have monthly dinners at my house for neighbors, and I'm building a community of entrepreneurs.
 

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I've been away from virtually all of my closest friends for the last eighteen months, but the past six months have been some of the most interesting and exciting times of my life. Attribute that to my business finally taking off, and allowing me to experience the ups and downs along the way.

Loneliness has to a lot to do with having no real mission or purpose to be devoted to.

As long as you are on your (and I emphasize "your") path, loneliness shouldn't be something to get to pent up about.
 

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People are reacting only nowadays. They don't work on themselves anymore, they don't have a vision. So it's also hard to connect with those, because we work on ourselves. It's hard to find compatibility.

Yes, that's what I've noticed as well. I find these kind of people (with a vision and something interesting going on) mostly when I travel to interesting places. And I try to keep my mind open back at home but I really don't meet many cool people there compared to when traveling.

Just for a few ideas, I'm currently running a men's group, have monthly dinners at my house for neighbors, and I'm building a community of entrepreneurs.

I remember your other post about the monthly dinners idea and it was cool. Where I live it's mostly old people so it makes little sense.

Also, I think it might be easier if you're fully invested in where you live. I'm not so I don't care that much.

As long as you are on your (and I emphasize "your") path, loneliness shouldn't be something to get to pent up about.

I'm financially independent already so this is more like a post-retirement problem. Either way, I don't agree it's not important. Whether you're working on your business or enjoying your retirement, it's important to have good friends to share your ups and downs with them.
 
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SteveO

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My friends have always been people with similar interests. I began having children at the age of 19. My kids and I enjoyed sports and motorcycle riding. We did lots of that.

My friends were a crowd of people that enjoyed the same things. We had a blast. My kids frequently tell me how much they enjoyed their childhood. I enjoyed that time as well.

I'm older now and the kids moved out many years ago. I moved on with my interests, got new friends, and still enjoy activities and company with many people that have different interests. Managing time becomes an issue.

I actively seek out groups that look fun and have similar interests. I love competition and my friends are usually pretty fanatical about their activities. Makes it pleasurable for me.
 

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Totally agree. It becomes increasingly harder to find friends. Personally, I had to learn how to put out invitations.
There will be a premium for people who are able to make new friends in real life, as most people start conversations on social media.
But then again, online allows us to go beyond space and connect with the right people.

People are reacting only nowadays. They don't work on themselves anymore, they don't have a vision. So it's also hard to connect with those, because we work on ourselves. It's hard to find compatibility.

Another problem I see is that tech people are building our future. A lot of them are not social at all and don't know what it means to design better experiences for people. Their vision is almost always purely digital. It's good that we have service designers coming in here.

A good thing I see is that social circles still kinda exist right after school and during university, and then slowly fade, as work becomes precedent.

I think the pendulum will swing towards the digital to the extreme, and then swing back to the other extreme afterwards(real life experiences). This has happened in history many times with many different matters.

But it's to early.

People are slowly waking up though.
I think we have the responsibility to build a future that allows people to connect in a real way.
What stops a person from working on themselves and enjoying others?
 

Mainstream7

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What stops a person from working on themselves and enjoying others?

I do agree that you can have friendships with all people, and it's a sign of really high/developed EQ if you can connect and be empathetic with everyone. My point is that it's hard to build deep connections, because somehow you might just talk past one another.
 

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I do agree that you can have friendships with all people, and it's a sign of really high/developed EQ if you can connect and be empathetic with everyone. My point is that it's hard to build deep connections, because somehow you might just talk past one another.
I don't know that my connections were that deep. Many different adventures with many different people. I guess that I just put myself out there a lot.

There are not many people that have done the variety or quantity of adventures that I have done. My life is complete but not finished. The memories that I carry with hundreds... maybe even thousands of other people are immense.
 

Martin Z

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I've been noticing this problem more and more often recently: people in their late twenties/early thirties are lonely and have very few friends. Perhaps it's only limited to me, my girlfriend, and some people I know so I wanted to post this thread and figure this out. Here are a few thoughts to offer more detail:
  • In my hometown, I have 0 friends with whom I meet up regularly. I had one friend until last year when his son was born. He had been telling me all the time that nothing would change when he would become a father (I never believed him) but now we talk only online. I think I saw him last time over six months ago. Before, we used to meet at least 2-3 times a week. My other friends who live in the same city have gone in a different direction in life and we don't really mesh that well anymore. We sometimes meet but usually I'm okay with just one meeting per 3 months or so.
  • My other friends are almost exclusively virtual. We talk online but we rarely meet (1-2 times a year) or never. It's still good to be able to talk online but it's not the same as doing fun stuff together regularly and being spontaneous (impossible since they all live between 2-5 hours by car from where I live).
  • Almost all our friends/people we know lack initiative. If I organize something, they will join but by themselves they almost never set up anything. This makes me feel that they don't really care much about the relationship. So in return, I don't put in that much effort anymore.
  • In the case of my girlfriend, her friends have so little time that their lives are limited to work, home (with their partner), and their dogs. And we're talking about young people who supposedly should enjoy their youth.
  • As sad as it is, unless I'm traveling or learning something new with a coach, this forum is usually the main way I interact with strangers. I do enjoy this but like I said above, I'd like to have some deep friendships with people I trust that share my values and are available to do fun stuff together. As it is now, whatever new things I do, I just hire a coach and sometimes he or she becomes my sort of friend.
  • Speaking of traveling, I've found that it's usually way easier to find like-minded people when visiting places that interest us and match our values. But these relationships have the same problem: they're almost exclusively virtual. So in the end it's nice when you're there but it sort of dies when you're not there (which is kind of understandable if it's a new relationship).
  • Curiously, we often see people way older than we are who enjoy rich social lives. Heck, I think that my parents may actually have more friends and a richer social life than I do even though they live in the countryside and rarely leave their homes lol.
What are your thoughts, experiences, suggestions, whatever else is on your mind?
I think it's mainly due to technology. There are always two sides of the coin to everything. Yes, amazing opportunities arise because of it. Without the internet, we would have to send letters to each back and forth(which wouldn't work lol). Most young guys lack traditional manners that used to be mainstream 50-70 years ago.

It's also SO easy to be comfortable nowadays. We have more options than ever. You got the glamour on Instagram. You got the vloggers on YouTube. You got Netflix for movies. You got Uber for transportation. You got delivery apps for food. You got dating apps if you want a little hump. You virtually have anything to be more lazier than ever. Adults who were born 40-50 years ago would've dreamed to have the opportunitities that we have right now.

Heck think about how it was for guys 50 years ago when our grandparents/parents wanted to get laid.
They actually had to physically ask the girl out. They had to face their fears, and actually talk to the person in real life. And it was either a yes or no for a date, and that's it. Guys actually had BIGGER BALLS back then.

Now when guys are interested in girls, they'd prefer to get their social media credentials just like the rest of the guys, and talk to them online on messenger, IG, Snapchat or whatever where these girls are bombarded with messages from horny dudes just like them.

Even average looking girls get a quite a good deal of dudes messaging them, especially from Indian dudes lol. The really hot ones(9-10s) get a ton of messages daily.

Or if the guys are nervous or hesitant, they'd go home and jack off to some xxx.

By the way, I found that the best way to get a girl now is to actually talk to them in person. Your chances of getting a yes from her are so much higher. Why? Well, girls love confident guys. And girls in general are A LOT better at spotting signals from guys than the other way.

Things have definitely changed. Even the guys who I used to hang with are literally glued to their phones 24/7.

When I go to the gym for instance, I'm shocked by how many dudes are staring at their phones instead of working out. It's crazy! I mean I don't judge people often but I'm serious when I'm in the gym. And seeing all these guys makes me realize why they'll never get the physique they want.

To digress, having an amazing physique is not going to automatically give you girls. It does help a lot(especially in bed), but in the gym you get more jealous dudes trying to bump their ego by hovering around you, pretending to be stronger than you by doing a bunch of arm curls right in front of you. :hilarious:

I'm not a dating coach but I had problems with girls when I was a kid but now it's easy for me. So focus on being the best you can be and these things will come automatically. And of course this is not a dating thread, but these things are somewhat related as they go with our social skills as human beings, for both men and women.
 
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Mainstream7

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I look back away all the adventures
I don't know that my connections were that deep. Many different adventures with many different people. I guess that I just put myself out there a lot.

There are not many people that have done the variety or quantity of adventures that I have done. My life is complete but not finished. The memories that I carry with hundreds... maybe even thousands of other people are immense.

Yes. We need more real adventure these days. Friendships develop as we go out into the world, so there's the truth. That's what MTF is saying too(meeting people on travels etc.)

Sadly, most people are stuck in their home city with time-consuming work repeating the same day over and over. They might live in their own bubble and develop a very close-minded mindset and perspective. I think that's why it's hard to break into them.

For example, I have a friend who I often invite to do new things with. But he would say no. No, that's not right. No, probably not fun. No. Always no to new things.
That's why it's important to take initiative as leaders and have even more energy to break them, and call them to adventure.
You seem to have that energy which is incredible.

Also, when men and women get married, for most in our society, the hero's journey seems to end, and life is dedicated to the familiy's journey. This also might need reformation.
 
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SteveO

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Yes. We need more real adventure these days. Friendships develop as we go out into the world, so there's the truth. That's what MTF is saying too(meeting people on travels etc.)

Sadly, most people are stuck in their home city with time-consuming work repeating the same day over and over. They might live in their own bubble and develop a very close-minded mindset and perspective. I think that's why it's hard to break into them.

For example, I have a friend who I often invite to do new things with. But he would say no. No, that's not right. No, probably not fun. No. Always no to new things.
That's why it's important to take initiative as leaders and have even more energy to break them, and call them to adventure.
You seem to have that energy which is incredible.

Also, when men and women get married, for most in our society, the hero's journey seems to end, and life is dedicated to the familiy's journey. This also might need reformation.
My advice is to find groups that do things you like to do. Not to try and convert your current friends.
 

thechosen1

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I've been noticing this problem more and more often recently: people in their late twenties/early thirties are lonely and have very few friends. Perhaps it's only limited to me, my girlfriend, and some people I know so I wanted to post this thread and figure this out. Here are a few thoughts to offer more detail:
  • In my hometown, I have 0 friends with whom I meet up regularly. I had one friend until last year when his son was born. He had been telling me all the time that nothing would change when he would become a father (I never believed him) but now we talk only online. I think I saw him last time over six months ago. Before, we used to meet at least 2-3 times a week. My other friends who live in the same city have gone in a different direction in life and we don't really mesh that well anymore. We sometimes meet but usually I'm okay with just one meeting per 3 months or so.
  • My other friends are almost exclusively virtual. We talk online but we rarely meet (1-2 times a year) or never. It's still good to be able to talk online but it's not the same as doing fun stuff together regularly and being spontaneous (impossible since they all live between 2-5 hours by car from where I live).
  • Almost all our friends/people we know lack initiative. If I organize something, they will join but by themselves they almost never set up anything. This makes me feel that they don't really care much about the relationship. So in return, I don't put in that much effort anymore.
  • In the case of my girlfriend, her friends have so little time that their lives are limited to work, home (with their partner), and their dogs. And we're talking about young people who supposedly should enjoy their youth.
  • As sad as it is, unless I'm traveling or learning something new with a coach, this forum is usually the main way I interact with strangers. I do enjoy this but like I said above, I'd like to have some deep friendships with people I trust that share my values and are available to do fun stuff together. As it is now, whatever new things I do, I just hire a coach and sometimes he or she becomes my sort of friend.
  • Speaking of traveling, I've found that it's usually way easier to find like-minded people when visiting places that interest us and match our values. But these relationships have the same problem: they're almost exclusively virtual. So in the end it's nice when you're there but it sort of dies when you're not there (which is kind of understandable if it's a new relationship).
  • Curiously, we often see people way older than we are who enjoy rich social lives. Heck, I think that my parents may actually have more friends and a richer social life than I do even though they live in the countryside and rarely leave their homes lol.
What are your thoughts, experiences, suggestions, whatever else is on your mind?
Yes.

I believe this is almost totally due to the internet.

My grandparents have better social lives than most kids in their 20’s, simply because they go physical places and meet people face to face.
 

SteveO

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Yes.

I believe this is almost totally due to the internet.

My grandparents have better social lives than most kids in their 20’s, simply because they go physical places and meet people face to face.
Are you saying that younger people don't have interests? I see so many out paddleboarding, surfing, rock climbing, hiking challenging trails, playing rec softball, 4 wheeling, camping, running, lifting at the gym, etc...
 

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I recently started MMA at a local gym. It's allowed me to meet a lot of new people which has been very good, considering I rarely spoke to people IRL prior to this.
 

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Are you saying that younger people don't have interests? I see so many out paddleboarding, surfing, rock climbing, hiking challenging trails, playing rec softball, 4 wheeling, camping, running, lifting at the gym, etc...
No they do. Well, not as much as in the past.

But so many of us spend ungodly amounts of time in front of screens. It’s like television except it’s always with you.

It reminds me of the movie Wall-E where they’re right next to each other but communicating by video chat.

Not to mention the incredible number of hours wasted on electronic devices versus doing things offline - speaking from firsthand experience
 

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I think this is a problem, regardless of age.

To change it, you need to step up and be a leader. Good example here: Before leaving for Utah I mentioned get a poker game going, one last hurrah for myself, but I could not host or organize it -- so someone had to step up. As far as I know, no one did -- and if someone did, everyone flaked out in the end and it never happened. In short, I had to organize and lead to make it happen, or it wasn't.

I think person-to-person contact is so low on people's priorities now that actual human interaction is endangered.

Bottomline is you have to find people who enjoy the same things as you, and then make an effort to do IRL activities.
 

MJ DeMarco

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I think now people are more and more trying to replace IRL activities with virtual activities and it's making things even worse.

Yea, and you can thank Zuckerfuck for that. "Meta" this you f*ckstick.
 

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@MJ DeMarco Sorry to bring out anything negative. Just wanted to say thank you for that advice - it is pure gold. My Dad always told me the same thing, I would complain that nobody’s doing anything and he would tell me it’s my job to be the leader and make fun things happen.

That’s just good old fashioned fatherly advice. I’m working on it!
 

Phil Yu

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I wouldn't say we are lonely. We are more social than ever. Maybe we are transiting from the traditional face to face relationship to more virtual/digitized relationship?
 
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I think this is a problem, regardless of age.

To change it, you need to step up and be a leader. Good example here: Before leaving for Utah I mentioned get a poker game going, one last hurrah for myself, but I could not host or organize it -- so someone had to step up. As far as I know, no one did -- and if someone did, everyone flaked out in the end and it never happened. In short, I had to organize and lead to make it happen, or it wasn't.

I think person-to-person contact is so low on people's priorities now that actual human interaction is endangered.

Bottomline is you have to find people who enjoy the same things as you, and then make an effort to do IRL activities.
Instead of going to a party be the one throwing the party!

I’ve always been the organizer of vacations. Almost every vacay that I took, I have organized. Most people don’t want to deal with the research, organization and payment collecting. I actually don’t mind it.

Having said that, you also need to go do what you like to do. That’s how you meet friends.

For example, 12 years ago I saw Havasupai falls on the Discovery channel. I asked all my current friends and they all were non committal. So I just signed up and went with a college group. I actually had a little anxiety and wanted to chicken out. It was because I didn’t know anymore else and it would be a long 3 days if I didn’t mesh with anyone.

In that group I got bunked with a college professor, ended up taking his class in Prague, met many great friends, that I still talk to.

Also in that group, I met this girl that was a personal trainer, hired her, and hiked Macchu Picchu with her, she moved to SLC and we are still friends today.

She introduced me to a masseuse who then introduced me to another personal trainer. I hired him and been with him 5 years. We are good friends and he comes up to visit me in Colorado every summer.

When I look back at my friendships they all came from random interactions. You gotta get out there!
 

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My friends have always been people with similar interests.

Do you hang out with them after doing the activities or only when doing them? Because I find it's one thing to go, say, rock climbing in a gym, and talk with a few people you know (not really satisfying socially), and another to have a friend who also happens to be a rock climber.

It's also SO easy to be comfortable nowadays. We have more options than ever. You got the glamour on Instagram. You got the vloggers on YouTube. You got Netflix for movies. You got Uber for transportation. You got delivery apps for food. You got dating apps if you want a little hump. You virtually have anything to be more lazier than ever. Adults who were born 40-50 years ago would've dreamed to have the opportunitities that we have right now.

Most of these options (I mean the social ones, not Uber) are quite empty if not dangerous to your mental health.

Instagram - feel bad seeing how shitty your life is compared to the (fabricated) lives of perfect people.
vloggers - as above.
dating apps - be a pitiful fool trying to pick up women online based on a few (fabricated) pictures and a made-up online persona.

Yes. We need more real adventure these days. Friendships develop as we go out into the world, so there's the truth. That's what MTF is saying too(meeting people on travels etc.)

Sadly, most people are stuck in their home city with time-consuming work repeating the same day over and over. They might live in their own bubble and develop a very close-minded mindset and perspective. I think that's why it's hard to break into them.

Yes, 100% that. I even find it hard to get people to do something fun nearby, like go kayaking. People are so lazy they don't want to do anything even remotely challenging (and if they do, maybe you'll get them to do that 1-2 a year).

My grandparents have better social lives than most kids in their 20’s, simply because they go physical places and meet people face to face.

My point exactly. When I travel, I see so many retirees living like kings, with a group of friends and visible, deep contentment on their faces. They don't pretend to be someone else, they don't use their f***** phones all the time, and they really don't care about anything else other than having a good time with their friends. Young people seem to be doing a lot of stuff just so they can post it online.

Are you saying that younger people don't have interests? I see so many out paddleboarding, surfing, rock climbing, hiking challenging trails, playing rec softball, 4 wheeling, camping, running, lifting at the gym, etc...

They do. The problem is that, at least for me, it's hard to take a relationship beyond this frame. I met some people in an indoor climbing gym but it doesn't really change anything as we only talk about climbing and sometimes don't even really remember each other's names.

I recently started MMA at a local gym. It's allowed me to meet a lot of new people which has been very good, considering I rarely spoke to people IRL prior to this.

Did you take the relationship further or is it only happening during a workout and only about the workout and nothing else?

I think person-to-person contact is so low on people's priorities now that actual human interaction is endangered.

Exactly. So I guess maybe the starting point is to find people who don't have it so low on their list of priorities (and screw those who do lol).

I think now people are more and more trying to replace IRL activities with virtual activities and it's making things even worse.

100% - as commented below in response to another post.

I wouldn't say we are lonely. We are more social than ever. Maybe we are transiting from the traditional face to face relationship to more virtual/digitized relationship?

And that's exactly the problem. The virtual activities ultimately mean shit. Do you have any great childhood memories in the virtual world?

When I was young, I did play some video games with friends but we didn't play online - we actually met at someone's place to play, for example, Heroes of Might and Magic or we went to an Internet cafe and played Counter Strike in the same room.

These days, nobody does that anymore. And virtual really isn't an improvement. It may be convenient not to have to leave your home but it robs you of a normal human connection.

I’ve always been the organizer of vacations. Almost every vacay that I took, I have organized. Most people don’t want to deal with the research, organization and payment collecting. I actually don’t mind it.

I also enjoy organizing that but I only organize it for my girlfriend and me. None of the friends want to go, or they don't have money (but they do have money to spend on BS), or they don't have time because they work too much, or they have other obligations (kids).

So if forced to choose between going alone/with my girlfriend or going with a stranger, I'd rather choose the first option. I'm too much of an introvert to risk traveling with someone I don't know and hating the experience. Hell, I went on a few trips with a guy I do know fairly well and these were some of my most hellish trips; the last one ended with a 12-hour drive without uttering a single word.

Perhaps if I were to create a good filtering process for organizing vacations it could work (for example, I think that many people from this forum would be cool travel companions).
 

Kevin88660

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I'm financially independent already so this is more like a post-retirement problem. Either way, I don't agree it's not important. Whether you're working on your business or enjoying your retirement, it's important to have good friends to share your ups and downs with them.
Besides things going virtual I think lack of time (pre-financial independence as a cause) plays an important role.

Once people leave school they are sucked into work/business/family and kids.

When they have spare time, they probably ask for sleep.

It could be mitigated with better time management, but most could not.

So hanging out with friends for the sake of doing so become the lowest priority.
 

Kevin88660

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Is it just me who thinks is going to enable Meta to spy on people even more?
Probably they are forced into this. Facebook is speculated to be dying in the future..for a long time. They have a demographic crisis.

Mark once said the biggest risk is not taking risk. That probably explains it. Instead of trying to the best social media (out of many), it is worth a bet to be first in the future.
 

Martin Z

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Probably they are forced into this. Facebook is speculated to be dying in the future..for a long time. They have a demographic crisis.

Mark once said the biggest risk is not taking risk. That probably explains it. Instead of trying to the best social media (out of many), it is worth a bet to be first in the future.
I think the reason why FB is still at its throne is because whenever a new social network emerged very quickly(like Whatsapp, Instagram, Messenger etc.), FB gave the contestants an offer that they couldn't resist, so FB bought them. FB also tried to buy Snapchat but it looks like Snapchat is doing a good job on its own.

I mean there aren't many big social networks out there(Besides FB, Instagram, YouTube, Twitter, Snapchat and now TikTok etc.). So creating a new big thing could be a huge opportunity as a lot of people are tired of FB's policies in how they treat their users.
 

SteveO

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Do you hang out with them after doing the activities or only when doing them? Because I find it's one thing to go, say, rock climbing in a gym, and talk with a few people you know (not really satisfying socially), and another to have a friend who also happens to be a rock climber.
Yes. We have a group of 6 to 8 people that we go out to dinner with every week. Went to a potluck dinner with a group last night after attending a full moon event.

Within all these groups are subgroups of friends.

Sometimes I feel like I'm on social overload.
 

doster.zach

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I think people are also expecting their interactions with other people to be as "perfect" as possible.

Everything in our life is now being tailored to stimulate us as much as possible:

  • Video games went from "Pong and Pac man" to Call of Duty

  • Food went from a chicken and rice to 4 cheese mac and cheese with bacon.

  • Social interactions used to be unavoidable, but now if you don't like someone you can just block them to make sure you're not uncomfortable at any time!
Obviously there's nothing wrong with these on the surface level, but people are now able to avoid discomfort, and in a way we need to artificially add it back into our lives for our own benefit.
 

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