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RANT Always an uphill battle always an uphill battle always an uphill battle

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BellaPippin

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I just need someone to read this. Or the illusion that someone did. Or just taking it out of my chest. Whatever.

You know, when I went from making 45k to 56k a year I kinda felt on top of the world because with a $1600 bi-weekly paycheck and $1200 MONTHLY expenses, I had such a big chump change to save but also to enjoy my hard earned money, putting myself thru this mind numbing thing day after day. But I started sending $1000 a paycheck to the savings for the downpayment super hardcore, so there goes my play money. But it's ok, it was a good cause. It's a long term play. Patience.

Now I bought the place but I had to burn the 15k I had left --which would have made for a nice runway-- to pay half of the masonry repairs, and I'll have to finance the other half, albeit most of it without interest. It still makes sense because the building is cash positive already, but the repairs were urgent and it was still cheaper than finishing a basement and renting it under the table which I didn't want. With this building I can wait until the city makes it legal to worry about doing anything to the basement.

But you know what I'm frustrated, like... I never got to enjoy my new found raise. "Oh but you have a building now" Yes I do. But now I'm putting the same $1000 every paycheck to my savings to try to build a new cushion plus paying off the 2nd half of the repairs as fast as I can.

It never enddsssssss. If I still had those 15k I could have gone part-time by the end of the year, doing whatever.

I have a few months before the year ends to try to come up with something that gives me even more $$$. I'm exhausted though. It was such an uphill battle saving that money. Now that I finally did it I was hoping to idk, enjoy a few months of full income without worrying so much about what I spend and how --which still didn't work because I still did get CC debt to funnel cash for the downpayment-- I mean.. it's a mess

The line between managing money well and messing it up is like a Venn diagram with "Me" in the middle. I swear.

I'M FRUSTRATEDDD
 

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BizyDad

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Yeah, the grind is hard. I feel ya.

It never enddsssssss

It can end whenever you want it. Just walk away. Move to Argentina.

If you want a little bit more responsible ending, put it back on the market. Accept the loss. Tuck tail, and say this building owner real estate investment thing isn't for me.

Otherwise, wake up tomorrow and you can make an empowered decision to keep going. Sock away your $1,000 a month. This time save some extra.

Soon enough you'll be a two building owner saying it never endsssss.

And you can face the same decision that day that you do today. That you do everyday.

But maybe, just maybe, 20 years down the road, you'll be a 20 building owner. With a successful art career, and an upcoming gallery opening. Who knows?

And it never ends will have a whole another meaning for you.

Opportunities will feel like they are everywhere.

It never endssss....

Keep ya head up BP.
 
Last edited:

sparechange

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Good to have first world problems eh?
 

alexkuzmov

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I just need someone to read this. Or the illusion that someone did. Or just taking it out of my chest. Whatever.

You know, when I went from making 45k to 56k a year I kinda felt on top of the world because with a $1600 bi-weekly paycheck and $1200 MONTHLY expenses, I had such a big chump change to save but also to enjoy my hard earned money, putting myself thru this mind numbing thing day after day. But I started sending $1000 a paycheck to the savings for the downpayment super hardcore, so there goes my play money. But it's ok, it was a good cause. It's a long term play. Patience.

Now I bought the place but I had to burn the 15k I had left --which would have made for a nice runway-- to pay half of the masonry repairs, and I'll have to finance the other half, albeit most of it without interest. It still makes sense because the building is cash positive already, but the repairs were urgent and it was still cheaper than finishing a basement and renting it under the table which I didn't want. With this building I can wait until the city makes it legal to worry about doing anything to the basement.

But you know what I'm frustrated, like... I never got to enjoy my new found raise. "Oh but you have a building now" Yes I do. But now I'm putting the same $1000 every paycheck to my savings to try to build a new cushion plus paying off the 2nd half of the repairs as fast as I can.

It never enddsssssss. If I still had those 15k I could have gone part-time by the end of the year, doing whatever.

I have a few months before the year ends to try to come up with something that gives me even more $$$. I'm exhausted though. It was such an uphill battle saving that money. Now that I finally did it I was hoping to idk, enjoy a few months of full income without worrying so much about what I spend and how --which still didn't work because I still did get CC debt to funnel cash for the downpayment-- I mean.. it's a mess

The line between managing money well and messing it up is like a Venn diagram with "Me" in the middle. I swear.

I'M FRUSTRATEDDD

Ofcourse it never ends.
Thats the journey, the struggle that it is, its one and the same.
Do you truly want it to "end"?
What would that look like for you?
 

Jdes91

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It's frustrating for sure!!! Maybe a small mental break (1-2 months) from renovations is what you need to figure out whether you want to continue or not?
 

Hadrian

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I just need someone to read this. Or the illusion that someone did. Or just taking it out of my chest. Whatever.

You know, when I went from making 45k to 56k a year I kinda felt on top of the world because with a $1600 bi-weekly paycheck and $1200 MONTHLY expenses, I had such a big chump change to save but also to enjoy my hard earned money, putting myself thru this mind numbing thing day after day. But I started sending $1000 a paycheck to the savings for the downpayment super hardcore, so there goes my play money. But it's ok, it was a good cause. It's a long term play. Patience.

Now I bought the place but I had to burn the 15k I had left --which would have made for a nice runway-- to pay half of the masonry repairs, and I'll have to finance the other half, albeit most of it without interest. It still makes sense because the building is cash positive already, but the repairs were urgent and it was still cheaper than finishing a basement and renting it under the table which I didn't want. With this building I can wait until the city makes it legal to worry about doing anything to the basement.

But you know what I'm frustrated, like... I never got to enjoy my new found raise. "Oh but you have a building now" Yes I do. But now I'm putting the same $1000 every paycheck to my savings to try to build a new cushion plus paying off the 2nd half of the repairs as fast as I can.

It never enddsssssss. If I still had those 15k I could have gone part-time by the end of the year, doing whatever.

I have a few months before the year ends to try to come up with something that gives me even more $$$. I'm exhausted though. It was such an uphill battle saving that money. Now that I finally did it I was hoping to idk, enjoy a few months of full income without worrying so much about what I spend and how --which still didn't work because I still did get CC debt to funnel cash for the downpayment-- I mean.. it's a mess

The line between managing money well and messing it up is like a Venn diagram with "Me" in the middle. I swear.

I'M FRUSTRATEDDD
When Tony Robbins says having problems means you’re still alive I just want to punch him! Lol ☘️⚔️ #solidarity
 

BellaPippin

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Yeah, the grind is hard. I feel ya.



It can end whenever you want it. Just walk away. Move to Argentina.

If you want a little bit more responsible ending, put it back on the market. Accept the loss. Tuck tail, and say this building owner real estate investment thing isn't for me.

Otherwise, wake up tomorrow and you can make an empowered decision to keep going. Sock away your $1,000 a month. This time save some extra.

Soon enough you'll be a two building owner saying it never endsssss.

And you can face the same decision that day that you do today. That you do everyday.

But maybe, just maybe, 20 years down the road, you'll be a 20 building owner. With a successful art career, and an upcoming gallery opening. Who knows?

And it never ends will have a whole another meaning for you.

Opportunities will feel like they are everywhere.

It never endssss....

Keep ya head up BP.

Thanks... this is what I needed to hear. t_t

 

BellaPippin

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tpuffer

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I remember spending all my free time for three months straight renovating the open side on my duplex to get it rental ready.

Then after that having 3 water backups - each successfully larger until the last one where we have to rip the flooring up that I had spent a week laying myself. We then had to have the old cast iron exit pipe "jetted". This was a $6,000 adventure.

Another year and a half goes by and I'm laying flooring on the other side that I live in and find out that we have termites... minor damage though as we caught them early. We had to have holes drilled on the inside near the areas we saw them. and then trenched around the perimeter to insert the termite killing solution.

I sold the building 6 months later and turned a profit.

Challenge never stops. Even when you are moving forward there is challenge. There is just as much challenge in not doing anything to make progress in life. The challenge then is maintaining sanity due to not striving toward a goal and having some sort of meaning.

Take the weekend to assess everything with this challenge. Maybe reflect on if you missed anything during due diligence that you can be sure to not miss next time.

Then as @BizyDad stated lay out what your options are for solving the issue. And yes this does include selling the building and walking away if you deem the future potential for increased capital expenses are too much right now.
 

The-J

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Challenge never stops. Even when you are moving forward there is challenge. There is just as much challenge in not doing anything to make progress in life.

Excellent stuff.

The irony about all of this is that it's just as hard to go nowhere. Life's challenges are everywhere and they never end until you die. (And, depending on your religious beliefs, that might not be the end either)

If it's not this, it's something else. At least you chose your challenges. At least you've given a purpose for your challenges. At least you're dealing with pain for a reason.

At least you know WHY you're doing this. Sometimes you forget, but you DO know why. Don't forget to remind yourself WHY, and don't forget to take a breath and remember that the reality isn't how it is in your head!

(i'm speaking to myself mostly)
 

Jon L

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I vote for taking $100 a month out of that $1000 and splurging on something you'll enjoy. Not that a $100 splurge is a lot, but if you spend it right, it is still fun.

I recently bought a $100 Nest Audio speaker as an upgrade to the $25 Google Mini that was there previously. It sounds a lot better, and it picks up my voice from across the room. Its a tangible, even if small, reward for a job well done.

One day, that $100 might turn into a $100,000 car that you can buy a copy of every single month if you so desire. But for now, little rewards are important.
 

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PapaGang

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I just need someone to read this. Or the illusion that someone did. Or just taking it out of my chest. Whatever.

You know, when I went from making 45k to 56k a year I kinda felt on top of the world because with a $1600 bi-weekly paycheck and $1200 MONTHLY expenses, I had such a big chump change to save but also to enjoy my hard earned money, putting myself thru this mind numbing thing day after day. But I started sending $1000 a paycheck to the savings for the downpayment super hardcore, so there goes my play money. But it's ok, it was a good cause. It's a long term play. Patience.

Now I bought the place but I had to burn the 15k I had left --which would have made for a nice runway-- to pay half of the masonry repairs, and I'll have to finance the other half, albeit most of it without interest. It still makes sense because the building is cash positive already, but the repairs were urgent and it was still cheaper than finishing a basement and renting it under the table which I didn't want. With this building I can wait until the city makes it legal to worry about doing anything to the basement.

But you know what I'm frustrated, like... I never got to enjoy my new found raise. "Oh but you have a building now" Yes I do. But now I'm putting the same $1000 every paycheck to my savings to try to build a new cushion plus paying off the 2nd half of the repairs as fast as I can.

It never enddsssssss. If I still had those 15k I could have gone part-time by the end of the year, doing whatever.

I have a few months before the year ends to try to come up with something that gives me even more $$$. I'm exhausted though. It was such an uphill battle saving that money. Now that I finally did it I was hoping to idk, enjoy a few months of full income without worrying so much about what I spend and how --which still didn't work because I still did get CC debt to funnel cash for the downpayment-- I mean.. it's a mess

The line between managing money well and messing it up is like a Venn diagram with "Me" in the middle. I swear.

I'M FRUSTRATEDDD
IDK what other people will say, but I found I'm happier when I mentally go to that place where I know that it never ends. Doing something significant to better your life is always an uphill climb. And sometimes I get tired of this shit too.

But then I find I'm more motivated, I'm actually happier when I say "f*ck this, this is exactly the way it is, it isn't going to get any better, it will always be like this, forever, so another f*cking day at the beach motherf*ckers!" And I get up early and hit it all day long. God that feels so good.

What happens is that you start to develop a mental callus, and you actually go into some zone you haven't been before, and if you go there long enough people start to recognize it and get out of your way. That's when you know you are onto something. When you are out there, all alone, on the edge. And you're not quite sure if you hang out there too long you could go crazy, or maybe you already are. I'm trying to get back there right now because I haven't been there for over a year.

Please KEEP PUSHING ON THAT SHIT.

I mean, what's the alternative? Normal? That's another term for being 2 paychecks from broke.
 

BizyDad

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i'm speaking to myself mostly
Aren't we all? :rofl:

f*ck this, this is exactly the way it is, it isn't going to get any better, it will always be like this, forever, so another f*cking day at the beach motherf*ckers
Future title of your biography? I'd give it a read.
 

spElle

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I feel you Bella. After my nightmare property ownership situation I totally understand it's not all butterflies and rainbows.

Here for you if you ever need to rant beyond this thread!
 

PapaGang

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Aren't we all? :rofl:


Future title of your biography? I'd give it a read.
I know. This is how I talk to myself under my breath. You know that feeling when your switch gets flipped?

You know what I'm talking about?
Does anybody else feel this way?

Anyone else ever have that switch flipped?
 

ramonorencio

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I’m sure your future self will be glad to be going through this.
Just bought a building myself, and so far I see little downside aside from being afraid of getting tax raises here in Illinois. Regardless, congrats, buying a building isn’t the easiest thing lol.
 

Tom H.

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Congrats on having a cash flow positive building.

Kind of sounds like your problems are temporary, sounds like you're on the right track and one day you can look back on the sacrifices your making now with satisfaction.

It'd be nice to make more money in the meantime. I don't know what your professional skills are, if there's a path to increasing your income now that won't be a distraction from the big picture.

Keep going!
 

BellaPippin

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Challenge never stops. Even when you are moving forward there is challenge. There is just as much challenge in not doing anything to make progress in life. The challenge then is maintaining sanity due to not striving toward a goal and having some sort of meaning.
Immediately thought of this movie with your anecdote.


Thanks t. Like the phrase that says... I didn't get this far to get this far. Every once in a while I just wish I could reap some of the benefits already. I was going to get the $500 cashflow but that will be tied up to the repairs for several months. So I pulled my hairs a little.

At least you know WHY you're doing this. Sometimes you forget, but you DO know why. Don't forget to remind yourself WHY, and don't forget to take a breath and remember that the reality isn't how it is in your head!

100%... I know.

I vote for taking $100 a month out of that $1000 and splurging on something you'll enjoy.

I'm gonna say I've already been doing this... I've splurged on art supplies, IKEA thingies to make living room cozy now that I live with bf (and that felt good, deciding together and what not) a bike that I haven't used so far... (that one makes me feel guilty). In fact some of those actually give me some remorse, some don't. I had splurged on my Jiu Jitsu gi right before all this COVID stuff started so I didn't get to wear it. I splurged when my cousin came to visit and we went to a Bulls game vs the Clippers, took him out to dinner, etc.

If anything I have to feel more under control to know where the money goes. I'm good at budgeting but with the anxiety comes the spending/eating and getting off-track.

What happens is that you start to develop a mental callus, and you actually go into some zone you haven't been before,

I would love a mental callus where this stuff doesn't phase me.

I feel you Bella. After my nightmare property ownership situation I totally understand it's not all butterflies and rainbows.

Here for you if you ever need to rant beyond this thread!

Thank you friend.

I’m sure your future self will be glad to be going through this.
Just bought a building myself, and so far I see little downside aside from being afraid of getting tax raises here in Illinois. Regardless, congrats, buying a building isn’t the easiest thing lol.

My man I'm in IL too. Hoping I didn't invest at the wrong moment, but I did get a very very sweet interest rate.

Congrats on having a cash flow positive building.

Kind of sounds like your problems are temporary, sounds like you're on the right track and one day you can look back on the sacrifices your making now with satisfaction.

It'd be nice to make more money in the meantime. I don't know what your professional skills are, if there's a path to increasing your income now that won't be a distraction from the big picture.

Keep going!

Thanks man. I'm trying to focus on that, hoping it will provide some more relief.
 

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