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Redesign of a Ferrari product page. My first time writing Ad copy. I impressed myself. Thoughts?

ChrisV

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I’ve been trying to learn ad copy lately, so I figured I’d try to create a ferrari product page just for shits and giggles. I impressed myself. What do you guys think?

NThAmDl.jpg
 
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D

Deleted50669

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I really like the vertical flow. My only critique is the blue links kind of clash, and the video window could be bigger. Otherwise, this is awesome.
 

ChrisV

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My only critique is the blue links kind of clash

Totally agree.. I just got lazy toward the end.

the video window could be bigger.

There’s a reason for that... It’s a visual trick I use.


See how that whole section kind of creates a ‘diamond’ shape? Everything about this is designed to work within that.

TLiMGu2.png


If you make the video box bigger now it’s not longer a diamond and had a weird visual flow.

lp4m9wq.png


Just a visual flow trick I use. If it were a real site that video would obviously expand.
 
D

Deleted50669

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Totally agree.. I just got lazy toward the end.



There’s a reason for that... It’s a visual trick I use.


See how that whole section kind of creates a ‘diamond’ shape? Everything about this is designed to work within that.

TLiMGu2.png


If you make the video box bigger now it’s not longer a diamond and had a weird visual flow.

lp4m9wq.png


Just a visual flow trick I use. If it were a real site that video would obviously expand.
Very interesting, that's clever.
 
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ChrisV

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Thought of a few more clever advertising quips I could have used:

“We know, you hate long goodbyes. Don’t worry, it will be quick.”

ferrari_488_pista_5.jpg


I wonder if those little clever -isms actually help to sell. Considering most of the top agencies use them, I’m going to assume so.
 
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smark

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Nice. The only thing you need to understand though is that these catchy slogans only work for already profitable, established brands.

When talking about a luxury car giant like Ferrari people don't even need copy. Hell, not even a website link is needed. A high quality picture of the car speeding down a long straight is all it takes. No one needs convincing to want a Ferrari; all it takes is a reminder.

And this is where writing copy (or structuring ads in general) for established brands differs from advertising a brand/business/company never seen before.
 

sparechange

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Thats actually really awesome work!

Not sure why Ferrari went downhill after the 430 though, every car is ridiculous and Lamborghini is currently kicking they're a$$, really ugly cars now. oops bit off topic
 
D

Deleted50669

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Thought of a few more clever advertising quips I could have used:

“We know, you hate long goodbyes. Don’t worry, it will be quick.”

ferrari_488_pista_5.jpg


I wonder if those little clever -isms actually help to sell. Considering most of the top agencies use them, I’m going to assume so.
To me those are good to make light of an otherwise intimidating purchase. It kind of puts the buyer in a lighter mood.
 
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sparechange

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I doubt people that buy exotics care about money, well except the ones that fiance a used one lol
 

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I think i'd wanna see more "car" in an ad. big close ups, maybe the whole background be the car.
i guess it depends who ur marketing to, technical dudes who care about the insides, or aesthetic dudes who care about how cool it looks.
 
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Stargazer

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"The Best. Nothing Less." Isn't that Melania Trump's campaign for kids? "Be Best"

Make America Great Again (Donald Trump)

Make Britain Great Again (Ex Prime Minister of UK Maggie Thatcher 1950's speech)

Fac Romam Magnam Iterum (Nobody but you never know)

Dan
 

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Thanks for the feedback guys!
 

ChrisV

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When talking about a luxury car giant like Ferrari people don't even need copy. Hell, not even a website link is needed.
Not sure if that’s 100% true… for example me? I’m more of an Aston Martin Aficionado. I would definitely have to be sold on a Ferrari. Put yourself in the shoes of an supercar buyer. They may be on the fence of whether they want to trade in their 458 Italia and are looking on Ferrari’s webpage to research the newer models. I mean of course there’s some merit to the “Dude... it’s a Ferrari” argument, but I still think people research these decisions.

But for the most part I agree.. I just wanted to try my hand at writing advertisements and he new Ferrari was just something that interested me.
 
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The Abundant Man

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Not sure if that’s 100% true… for example me? I’m more of an Aston Martin Aficionado. I would definitely have to be sold on a Ferrari. Put yourself in the shoes of an supercar buyer. They may be on the fence of whether they want to trade in their 458 Italia and are looking on Ferrari’s webpage to research the newer models. I mean of course there’s some merit to the “Dude... it’s a Ferrari” argument, but I still think people research these decisions.

But for the most part I agree.. I just wanted to try my hand at writing advertisements and he new Ferrari was just something that interested me.
I'd buy an Aston Martin DB5 or DBS just so I can go up to the ladies and say,"The name's Bond...James Bond" in an expensive Tom Ford suit and Omega Seamster watch while drinking a Vodka Martini.
 

ChrisV

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You know, a lot of Advertising gurus tell you to sell people on the benefits, make the benefits salient, tc.. but most of the big marketing guys don’t even do that.

Geico had a bunch of funny ads that had nothing to do with insurance for a while. Coke is usually just people smiling. Pictures Nike just shows great Athletes. IF they sold people on Benefits, Coca-cola would just say “Drink this delicious, fizzy carbonated beverage” and Nike would say “These amazing silicone insoles will make you jump 1.13x higher than the previous Nike Airmax model”.... but neither of them do that.

From a Steve Jobs video on marketing, and how great marketers don’t try to sell you on features or even benefits (the bold parts are the applicable ones):

To me….marketing is about values. This is a very complicated world. It’s a very noisy world. And we’re not going to get a chance to get people to remember much about us. No company is! And so, we have to be really clear on what we want them to know about us. Now Apple, fortunately, is one of half-a-dozen best brands in the whole world. Right up there with Nike, Disney, Coke, Sony — it is one of the greats of the greats. Not just in this country, but all around the globe. But even a great brand needs investment and caring if it’s going to retain its relevance and vitality. And the Apple brand has clearly suffered from neglect in this area in the last few years. And we need to bring it back! The way to do that is NOT to talk about speeds and fees. It’s NOT to talk about bits and mega-hertz. It’s NOT to talk about why we are better than Windows. The dairy industry tried for 20 years to convince you that milk was good for you. It’s a lie, but they tried anyway. And the sales were falling. And then they tried “Got milk” and the sales went up. “Got milk” wasn’t even talking about the product. In fact, it focuses on the absence of the product. But the best example of all, and one of the greatest jobs of marketing that the universe has ever seen, is Nike. Remember, Nike sells a commodity. They sell shoes!!! And yet, when you think of Nike you feel something different than a shoe company. In their ads, as you know, they don’t ever talk about the product. They don’t ever tell you about their air soles and why they are better than Reebok’s air soles. What does Nike do in their advertising? They honor great athletes. And they honor great athletics. That’s who they are, that’s what they are about! Apple spends a fortune on advertising — you’d never know it….you’d never know it! So…when I got here, Apple just fired their agency and there was a competition with 23 agencies that…you know…four years from now we would pick one. And we blew that up and we hired Chiat\Day, the ad agency that I was fortunate enough to work with years ago and created some award winning work including the commercial voted the best ad ever made, 1984 (by Advertising Professionals). And…we started working about eight weeks ago, and the question we asked was, “Our customers want to know who is Apple and what is it that we stand for…where do we fit in this world?” And what we’re about isn’t making boxes for people to get their jobs done — although we do that well. We do that better than almost anybody, in some cases. But Apple is about something more than that! Apple at the core…its core value — is that, we believe that people with passion can change the world for the better. That’s what we believe. And we have had the opportunity to work with people like that. We’ve had the opportunity to work with people like you; with software developers, with customers, who have done it. In some big, and some small ways. And we believe that, in this world, people can change it for the better. And that those people who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world are the ones that actually do! And so, what we’re going to do in our first brand marketing campaign in several years, is to get back to that core value! A lot of things have changed. The market is in a total different place than where it was a decade ago. And Apple is totally different — and Apple’s place in it is totally different. And believe me, the products, and the distribution strategy, and the manufacturing are totally different…and we understand that. But values and core values — those things shouldn’t change. The things that Apple believed in at its core, are the same things Apple really stands for today.

 
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ChrisV

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Looks good. Very apple-y

Ha. Funny you noticed that because I’ve been studying Apple’s marketing strategy heavily lately, since they’re one if the best of all time.
 

smark

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You know, a lot of Advertising gurus tell you to sell people on the benefits, make the benefits salient, tc.. but most of the big marketing guys don’t even do that.

Geico had a bunch of funny ads that had nothing to do with insurance for a while. Coke is usually just people smiling. Pictures Nike just shows great Athletes. IF they sold people on Benefits, Coca-cola would just say “Drink this delicious, fizzy carbonated beverage” and Nike would say “These amazing silicone insoles will make you jump 1.13x higher than the previous Nike Airmax model”.... but neither of them do that.

From a Steve Jobs video on marketing, and how great marketers don’t try to sell you on features or even benefits

But they are! Just because an ad does not explicitly mention the benefits of its products (or the benefits of being part of a brand) does not mean that they are not there.

Geico is successful with its ads because it promotes a less-serious tone which makes you feel a bit better about a multi-billion dollar insurance giant. Nike is all about helping athletes do what they do best and that is what their ads represent. Coke does the same thing by showing that their product is something which is present in almost every social interaction in the world since its invention.

The key is to communicate how you want your prospective buyers to feel when they use your product and this is not something that you can just say; you have to show it.

Patek Phillipe has been using the same slogan and (for the most part) same ad structure for as long as I can remember.

prt_275x358_1505424939_2x.jpg
 

ApparentHorizon

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Totally agree.. I just got lazy toward the end.



There’s a reason for that... It’s a visual trick I use.


See how that whole section kind of creates a ‘diamond’ shape? Everything about this is designed to work within that.

TLiMGu2.png


If you make the video box bigger now it’s not longer a diamond and had a weird visual flow.

lp4m9wq.png


Just a visual flow trick I use. If it were a real site that video would obviously expand.

How important is visual flow and do you have any recommended reading on this?

I've noticed better engagement when headlines are longer than the subheadline, rather than vice-versa.

Your Headline Goes Here
Buy This Now

vs

Your Headline Here
Buy This Cool Trinket Now
Coke is usually just people smiling.

This popped up in my feed a few days ago:
 
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W. Sabria

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Nice. The only thing you need to understand though is that these catchy slogans only work for already profitable, established brands. When talking about a luxury car giant like Ferrari people don't even need copy.

in this case, the copy gives the brand a voice, unique tone and a distinct personality. consumers consciously and/or unconsciously perceive the brand differently as a result. while any calls-to-action serve to more directly drive users to purchase/reserve/inquire the headlines and supporting copy precondition the user to connect and engage; creating likeability and curiosity.
 

rogue synthetic

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Benefits are always there in an ad, otherwise it's just pretty pictures. Nothing against art, but it isn't selling your product.

Benefit isn't "this cool widget does XYZ"

Benefit is "if you buy this cool widget, your wife will love you again"

or "you won't feel like such a loser"

or "you'll replace the love you didn't get from dad"

Identity and value and status are all benefits from the marketer's POV.
 

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Thought of a few more clever advertising quips I could have used:

“We know, you hate long goodbyes. Don’t worry, it will be quick.”

Hi Chris, If this is your first attempt at copy, you've got hidden talent. From what I've read it's important to know your target. As for the car, it's probably people like me who have some experience, education and bucks. I don't know about your generation, but ours likes stories. Tell a story. You actually cracked the shell a bit w/ the "...long goodbyes..." piece. It's human, it has emotion, we can all relate to that experience, either dumping or being..., you could weave more into the fabric of the story..."she'll understand, time flies when you're having fun..." That image/story you created is brilliant copy in my humble opinion. I hope you post another of your forays into copy. Greg


ferrari_488_pista_5.jpg


I wonder if those little clever -isms actually help to sell. Considering most of the top agencies use them, I’m going to assume so.
 
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Argue

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I like the copy, not the design. Great job on putting what you learned into action!
 

ChrisV

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How important is visual flow and do you have any recommended reading on this?

I've noticed better engagement when headlines are longer than the subheadline, rather than vice-versa.

Your Headline Goes Here
Buy This Now

vs

Your Headline Here
Buy This Cool Trinket Now

I really don’t have any reading... it just looks better. Like you said in your example:

Your Headline Goes Here
Buy This Now

Better than

Your Headline Here
Buy This Cool Trinket Now
I play around with different alignments and spacing yntil it looks right. It’s more of an intuitive thing thatyou ‘feel’ than something that has specific rules.

Our best
work. Just got better.​

Simply doesn’t look right. It looks ‘off’ and I play with it until it looks ‘on’
 

ChrisV

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But they are! Just because an ad does not explicitly mention the benefits of its products (or the benefits of being part of a brand) does not mean that they are not there.


Geico is successful with its ads because it promotes a less-serious tone which makes you feel a bit better about a multi-billion dollar insurance giant. Nike is all about helping athletes do what they do best and that is what their ads represent. Coke does the same thing by showing that their product is something which is present in almost every social interaction in the world since its invention.


The key is to communicate how you want your prospective buyers to feel when they use your product and this is not something that you can just say; you have to show it.


Patek Phillipe has been using the same slogan and (for the most part) same ad structure for as long as I can remember.

Okay, that’s fair. Touché. I guess they imply benefits. Nike implying you’ll be a better athlete, coke implying it will make you happy (the cola... relax guys :))

But this may be an advertising lesson in and of itself, that it’s better to IMPLY benefits than explicitly state them. Again, none of the big advertising giants explicitly state benefits.

Coke doesn’t have a ad saying “drink a coke! It will make you happy!”.. instead they just show you a picture of smiling children.

The first one can create mental resistance. “A coke will make me happy?! Yea right.” While it’s hard to argue with a picture of a smiling kid. Even if you were to argue “coke won’t make me happy!” The company can say “ummmm we never said that.” I think these big guys let people figure out the benefits for themselves. Rather than Nike saying “our AirMax shoes will double your 3-pointers!” They just show a picture of Kobe making an amazing shot while wearing AirMaxs which IMPLIES it will improve your game. You can’t really argue with that picture. You can’t call Nike a liar because they’re technically not making any claims. “Who said it will improve your game? We didn’t say that. You did.” And without even making that claim, they show EVIDENCE of it improving someone’s game. The reader is left to make all these observations themselves.
 
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smark

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The first one can create mental resistance. “A coke will make me happy?! Yea right.” While it’s hard to argue with a picture of a smiling kid. Even if you were to argue “coke won’t make me happy!” The company can say “ummmm we never said that.” I think these big guys let people figure out the benefits for themselves. Rather than Nike saying “our AirMax shoes will double your 3-pointers!” They just show a picture of Kobe making an amazing shot while wearing AirMaxs which IMPLIES it will improve your game. You can’t really argue with that picture. You can’t call Nike a liar because they’re technically not making any claims. “Who said it will improve your game? We didn’t say that. You did.” And without even making that claim, they show EVIDENCE of it improving someone’s game. The reader is left to make all these observations themselves.

Precisely! Creating "vague" ads like the ones you mentioned can be a huge advantage to your message, especially considering that prospective buyers will interpret it differently according to their own personality, beliefs or opinions. Therefore, they will make themselves believe that the brand is all about what they believe in and not necessarily what it actually stands for (keep in mind though that this can also be a disadvantage in some cases).

Showing > Telling. Also, I'm a firm believer that design > copy in print ads.
cartier-cartier-panthere-2-600-20761.jpg


I believe this Cartier ad illustrates my point perfectly. Although it's important to note that Cartier's products speak for themselves and rarely NEED copy. Same goes for Coke or Nike products though. Or pretty much any other brand selling well-known iconic goods.
 

ChrisV

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Showing > Telling. Also, I'm a firm believer that design > copy in print ads.

As another example, I made an explicit Marlboro advertisement to compare to their implicit ones.

ETBJhpV.jpg


vs

RzEGPrR.jpg

I don’t think the explicit one blows over too well.
 

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