Too scared to fail: Millennials aren't starting businesses

[luniac]

And yet mockery and humiliation can be a powerful motivator if channeled correctly. A guy I used to go to school with started DJ'ing in high school.

At first he was laughed at for being an unpopular geeky kid making a few beats on Fruity Loops. 'you will never be a real DJ, you suck, etc' they said. But he stuck at it. Starting by playing at school balls, then later local bars and so on.

Soon he was playing gigs regularly across the country. And just last year he signed with the local branch of an international record label company to record an album.

I bet success after ridicule is the greatest feeling in the world.

 

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[masterneme]

People would do better if the rest weren't so obsessed with labeling and categorizing everyone. You know? If they weren't called "millennials" and just treated as individuals maybe they wouldn't feel the social pressure of meeting what's expected from them, and also those expectancies would disappear from everyone else.

Just a thought.

 

[Waspy]

If they weren't called "millennials" and just treated as individuals maybe they wouldn't feel the social pressure

Sounds like millennial speak to me!

 

[MidwestLandlord]

Based on my 26 years on this planet and my ok historical knowledge and extensive movie viewing experience lol, I think previous generations had much stronger sense of self esteem, and i think a lot of that had to do with good upbringing and social support for each other. Maybe even a sense of community played a part.

I mean if i lived in a tightly knit neighborhood where everyone supported each other and i wanted to start some business, i honestly would have more balls to call people get info etc etc because i feel like my neighborhood got my back.

I blame the internet.

One of the greatest inventions in human history, and what do most people do with it? They use it to action-fake, compare themselves to other's over social media, use social media to only show their "highlight reel" instead of their failures, attention-whore, and seek out and find confirmation of their biases for why they can't succeed.

They read about building a business instead of building a business.
They read about talking to girls instead of talking to girls.
They read about getting in shape instead of hitting the gym or the sidewalk.
They read about traveling the world instead of traveling the world.
They talk to people over FB or forums instead of making real life friends.
They endlessly text over Tinder or Match instead of insisting on meeting for a drink.
They endlessly post about the poor kid with cancer instead of giving their time or money to help.
They endlessly share their opinion on everything, without having any depth of knowledge or experience to know if they are right or wrong.

No other generation in history has had such an easy to use and socially acceptable action-fake tool available to them.

It's easy to be scared of life when you've never actually experienced it.

We've turned into a world of socially-retarded hermits who sit behind a screen living in fear.

 

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[masterneme]

Sounds like millennial speak to me!

I'm an eternial in fact, just look at my avatar

 

[Van Halen]

Some things I have learned as a Millennial:

1. Every generation thinks they are the best generation, and wants to talk about how great they are and talk badly about the others.
2. There are winners and losers from every generation.
3. There always has been and always will be sidewalkers, slowlaners, and fastlaners in every generation. None of these choices/lifestyles is right or wrong, if someone is happy with their life, who cares.
4. Most people are lazy, regardless of what generation they are from. Work hard and you will be rewarded.
5. Be grateful for what you have. Work for what you want.

So surely that means; it's regardless what generation you're from; thus being no greatest generation of people?

 

[SquatchMan]

We've turned into a world of socially-retarded hermits who sit behind a screen living in fear.

This about sums it up. Will be interesting to see how the next 20 years play out.

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

I blame the internet.

One of the greatest inventions in human history, and what do most people do with it? They use it to action-fake, compare themselves to other's over social media, use social media to only show their "highlight reel" instead of their failures, attention-whore, and seek out and find confirmation of their biases for why they can't succeed.

They read about building a business instead of building a business.
They read about talking to girls instead of talking to girls.
They read about getting in shape instead of hitting the gym or the sidewalk.
They read about traveling the world instead of traveling the world.
They talk to people over FB or forums instead of making real life friends.
They endlessly text over Tinder or Match instead of insisting on meeting for a drink.
They endlessly post about the poor kid with cancer instead of giving their time or money to help.
They endlessly share their opinion on everything, without having any depth of knowledge or experience to know if they are right or wrong.

No other generation in history has had such an easy to use and socially acceptable action-fake tool available to them.

It's easy to be scared of life when you've never actually experienced it.

We've turned into a world of socially-retarded hermits who sit behind a screen living in fear.

Featured!

I heard this the other day...

Are you using your smartphone? Or is your smartphone using you?

This isn't just about millennials, but about making an entire society subservient to a particular narrative that befits huge corporate oligarchs... and sorry, starting a business to compete with those oligarchs while exorcising yourself from the ranks of an obedient drone isn't apart of that narrative.

 

[G-Man]

I blame the internet.

Sort of reminds me of the pleasure machine thought experiment in ethics, but in the pleasure machine experiment, the subject isn't aware that he's living vicariously through a machine. I'm fully aware that I'm living vicariously through a machine. Does that mean I'm victimizing myself?

http://waitbutwhy.com/table/the-experience-machine

 

[MidwestLandlord]

Does that mean I'm victimizing myself?

Yes.

 

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[Envision]

It comes down to what adversity you've faced in your life and how that shaped your mindset, intentions, and goals.

Most millenials have it easy which has completely screwed there chances of creating a solid life path and building their future into something respectable

Cant afford college? Get student loans and worry about it later
Cant start a business? Pay some guy for his course and follow his step by step instructions
Cant get a girlfriend? Get on tinder and swipe right until someone thinks your attractive enough to talk to
Don't have money? Ask your parents for a job, salary, or $20 to get what you want.

Im 22, i'd say 99% of my friends are living in that type of an environment. But they never had life suck really bad. There parents handed them pretty much everything. They would never put themselves out there to eat shit for 5 years to build a successful business or create something that provides them the lifestyle they see in the pictures on Instagram. They wont sacrifice their Friday and Saturday nights with the boys to pack inventory, talk with suppliers, and plan the following week. They'd never drop all their savings (if they had any) on an inventory order to see if there idea would work not know if it was proven or not. They want everything handed to them, or its not worth their time and if it could fail then why would they even try? They would have just wasted their time.

And the millennial generations parents didn't realize they were in a system that worked effectively in a time where innovation/tech didn't really have the impact and influence it does now. So they blame their kids for not doing shit, when they system they grew up in was completely different than what their kids are in now (and what their telling/forcing their kids to do), and their kids are not prepared at all for the adversity that life is going to beat them with.

 

[Van Halen]

It comes down to what adversity you've faced in your life and how that shaped your mindset, intentions, and goals.

Most millenials have it easy which has completely screwed there chances of creating a solid life path and building their future into something respectable

Cant afford college? Get student loans and worry about it later
Cant start a business? Pay some guy for his course and follow his step by step instructions
Cant get a girlfriend? Get on tinder and swipe right until someone thinks your attractive enough to talk to
Don't have money? Ask your parents for a job, salary, or $20 to get what you want.

Im 22, i'd say 99% of my friends are living in that type of an environment. But they never had life suck really bad. There parents handed them pretty much everything. They would never put themselves out there to eat shit for 5 years to build a successful business or create something that provides them the lifestyle they see in the pictures on Instagram. They wont sacrifice their Friday and Saturday nights with the boys to pack inventory, talk with suppliers, and plan the following week. They'd never drop all their savings (if they had any) on an inventory order to see if there idea would work not know if it was proven or not. They want everything handed to them, or its not worth their time and if it could fail then why would they even try? They would have just wasted their time.

And the millennial generations parents didn't realize they were in a system that worked effectively in a time where innovation/tech didn't really have the impact and influence it does now. So they blame their kids for not doing shit, when they system they grew up in was completely different than what their kids are in now (and what their telling/forcing their kids to do), and their kids are not prepared at all for the adversity that life is going to beat them with.

As a filthy millennial, how do I toughen the F*ck up? Start putting my balls on the line and dive head first?

 

[Envision]

As a filthy millennial, how do I toughen the F*ck up? Start putting my balls on the line and dive head first?

To be honest, I don't really care how or what you do to figure it out. Your parents may lose their jobs, eventually causing them to lose their house and get a divorce, and you may find out your siblings are addicted to drugs, suicidal, or cutting themselves. You may be in such a shitty spot that all you do is exist in a shit hole mobile home park trying to figure out how to make more than minimum wage while everyone around you hates their lives and is literally existing to die while you close in on borderline homelessness. Somewhere along the line you'll snap and decide to do whatever the F*ck need to do to make it... Or not, and if not you'll just continue to blend into the "rest" of them and you'll die eventually, probably not soon enough but it'll come.

Most milennials have the problem where there is no wolf chasing them. They live in comfort and limbo, they don't have to try because it will be done for them. It doesn't take much to be better than the rest of them, just do something. Find your wolf.

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

Start putting my balls on the line

What does this mean?

I mean, seriously?

Is "balls on the line" failing and having to work in a retail store stocking shelves?
Is "balls on the line" a public failure and having some internet comment troll calling you a moron?
Is "balls on the line" spending 4 weeks learning something that might not yield a dividend?
Is "balls on the line" having to live in a tiny studio apartment while your friends seemingly live large?

I'm curious... what is "balls on the line?" to you?

 

[happybhoy]

Social media has our ego's inflated to such a state that we don't want to be seen to suck at something....

 

[luniac]

Sort of reminds me of the pleasure machine thought experiment in ethics, but in the pleasure machine experiment, the subject isn't aware that he's living vicariously through a machine. I'm fully aware that I'm living vicariously through a machine. Does that mean I'm victimizing myself?

http://waitbutwhy.com/table/the-experience-machine

That was very interesting, making me think more about how i feel about hedonism.

 

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[maverick]

I had this moment in my life that I remember vividly.

I was playing The Witcher for about 9 hours straight, completely enveloped in this intriguing world, experiencing it as an intriguing character.

Then there was a power cut.

Once the computer went off, within 20 seconds I remember something inside me clearly saying 'Oh, so this is what my life actually is. This is what it feels like.' I felt worthless. It was an important lesson.

The reason I loved RPG and Storyline-based games so much was because my own life had no 'story'. I was a vegetable, not an interesting main character whose decisions make dents in the world.

So it is definitely instant gratification. Closing your eyes to your reality and pretending that it isn't there.

When I stopped gaming so much and started giving my monitor to my friend for the week to motivate myself to work in the library, I realized how creative, intelligent and actionable I'm capable of being.

Most millenials have more potential than they will ever know, because they've stuck themselves in a cycle of instant-gratification and virtual reality, which is not enough to make them happy, but enough to make them comfortably miserable.

This is very true indeed. I'd even go so far to say that reading and posting on forums without actually executing on your ideas is another form of instant gratification.

 

[Kade]

Most millennials have it easy which has completely screwed there chances of creating a solid life path and building their future into something respectable.

Yes and no. Perhaps it is because 99% of your peers are in that environment that you think this IS how it is for ALL millennials. A lot of those I know are struggling hard, but don't know how to go in the right direction. So once they are done working that job they don't enjoy, they spend their earned money to deal with the stress created by said job only to get back to work next week to fuel that lifestyle. Negative cycle.

The other day, I met up with a friend of mine, after having worked on this one project all week. So, we go out to eat and hang out at his place for a bit. After a while we somehow end up talking about life and how his day goes. A couple minutes pass, I show him what I've been doing, we talk and then each of us does his own thing, I'm working on said project trying to split atoms in my head while he is downloading a game. Once it is done, he starts up playing this online game. At first I take quick glances at the screen but as time increases it becomes harder and harder to take my eyes off it. Before I know it, I'm as immersed in the game as he his even though I did not want to focus on it. Seeing those pixels move was incredibly exciting.

Now my point is this: It is easy to look the other way and find everything online that you'd like to have in life, but that's where the easy part ends. It's even easier when your friends do it, this encourage the behavior. Building a business while no one understands? Why bother.

Recently there was a thread, here on TFF, from a young guy whose parents want him to be a doctor… Badly!
He would probably be the first (ok, the second, as i would be the first) to attest that in a society (and especially with parents) of which the highest law is ''Dare not fail!'', it is more sensible to suffer the 9-5 and mediocrity for your entire life, than suffer failure – any failure.

Why?

The social angst is real. That is what keeps most people in their mentality even if they want to change themselves. You want to train your abs to get a six pack for the next summer, so you stop drinking but what will you do when the boys call and invite you out to the bar?
Mentality really is contagious.

Ultimately I think this entire thread doesn’t really revolve around discrepancies between generations, it’s more of a camouflage for the mutual longing for the long lost culture of character and the despise for the current culture of personality.

Well said.

 

[Van Halen]

Yes and no. Perhaps it is because 99% of your peers are in that environment that you think this IS how it is for ALL millennials. A lot of those I know are struggling hard, but don't know how to go in the right direction. So once they are done working that job they don't enjoy, they spend their earned money to deal with the stress created by said job only to get back to work next week to fuel that lifestyle. Negative cycle.

The other day, I met up with a friend of mine, after having worked on this one project all week. So, we go out to eat and hang out at his place for a bit. After a while we somehow end up talking about life and how his day goes. A couple minutes pass, I show him what I've been doing, we talk and then each of us does his own thing, I'm working on said project trying to split atoms in my head while he is downloading a game. Once it is done, he starts up playing this online game. At first I take quick glances at the screen but as time increases it becomes harder and harder to take my eyes off it. Before I know it, I'm as immersed in the game as he his even though I did not want to focus on it. Seeing those pixels move was incredibly exciting.

Now my point is this: It is easy to look the other way and find everything online that you'd like to have in life, but that's where the easy part ends. It's even easier when your friends do it, this encourage the behavior. Building a business while no one understands? Why bother.


The social angst is real. That is what keeps most people in their mentality even if they want to change themselves. You want to train your abs to get a six pack for the next summer, so you stop drinking but what will you do when the boys call and invite you out to the bar?
Mentality really is contagious.



Well said.

So friends and associations are your problem?

 

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[Kade]

So friends and associations are your problem?

They used to be.
Actually maybe they still are. Not my point though, we're talking about a whole generation not myself.

 

[Van Halen]

They used to be.
Actually maybe they still are. Not my point though, we're talking about a whole generation not myself.

Yep, nope. You're right; sorry

 

[GatsbyMag]

This thread is gold.

The defining problem among young people is low self-esteem. And as aforementioned, low self-esteem usually manifests itself in 2 camps:
1. The Audience - they see someone who is "trying" and so they fling their judgments, "there's more to life than success and money", "why are you doing this, you're only 14", "she walks around as if she's the shit", "why are you studying at 12am?" etc.
2. The Actors/Actresses behind curtain - they admire people who are "trying" and would like to try themselves but they are afraid of being laughed at, humiliated and having a failure on their record, "I just don't think anyone will like my stories", "I don't want to look like I'm trying too hard", "I think some people are just born to be successful"

The worst thing about this problem is that it's reinforced by peers who all have low self-esteem too and consequently anyone that has high self-esteem is considered "too loud", "pompous", "arrogant" or "too confident" (maybe unless they're famous -- then it's okay!). Here's an exercise for those interested, open the YikYak app during the middle of the night and look for locations with college campuses and then read the Yaks, you'll notice most are people complaining about their "social anxiety".

Self-esteem is made up of 2 ingredients; believing that 1. you're competent (self-confident) and 2. you're worthy of living (self-respect). The quickest way to gain self-esteem is by being more self-confident, and the quickest and only way to do that is by mastering activities you're not good at, which requires you to step outside of your zone of familiarity.

Most people rather stay comfortable and ironically it's that decision that brings them a very uncomfortable life.

"Most men live in quiet desperation" - Les Brown

P.S.

This is why I love TMF , not because of MJ's valuable lessons. But because it has a culture that does not allow you to get away with excuses. I've asked a lot of stupid questions on this forum and there's always someone that gives me the cold hard truth regardless of my feelings, it has what I'd imagine to be a 'military training' atmosphere. The type of ambience that can either make or break you.

 

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[luniac]

You know this got me thinking some more lol...
Maybe the repercussions for failure are more severe now than ever before?
Back then rent was cheap, jobs were plentiful(ok they still are if u not a bum i guess), people had balls, and you wouldn't get sued for looking at someone the wrong way.

Today im 26 with fulltime 35k a year salary and i still share apartment with my mother, splitting all bills together.
Granted i live in new york city, im well aware there are much cheaper places out there.

Nowadays everyone wants u to take college loans, get credit cards, etc etc... and people ain't too bright.
shit if you dress totally out of fashion you're a damn social pariah, i know this personally.

There really is an information overload and people just care too much about the most unimportant crap.

I lived in Israel in the 90's and moved to new york at around 2000 at 10 years old, and i remember the kids are just different. And all of a sudden people commented on the clothes i wore (u wear payless haha)... i mean jesus wtf lol!

 

[Dylan_91]

Interesting article on Millennials and entrepreneurship.

Too scared to fail: Millennials aren't starting businesses

So let's motivate the "millennials" on here and let them know that you need to fail to learn and you need to fail to succeed!!

I think a lot of it has to do with the almost "obvious" answer in grade school which is go to college. At least I know in school that's all it ever amounted to, preparing for college. It was almost as if it was expected and at least talking with parents it wasn't as expected. I think that with the student loan debt could potentially cause this financial fear in a lot of young people, hindering their drive. Personally, I know a lot of peers around my age, 25, who talk about business ideas all the time but most of them rarely go for it. I think with social media it has given "millennials" an advantage as most grew up with computers in a classroom.

 

[ZF Lee]

I blame the internet.

One of the greatest inventions in human history, and what do most people do with it? They use it to action-fake, compare themselves to other's over social media, use social media to only show their "highlight reel" instead of their failures, attention-whore, and seek out and find confirmation of their biases for why they can't succeed.

They read about building a business instead of building a business.
They read about talking to girls instead of talking to girls.
They read about getting in shape instead of hitting the gym or the sidewalk.
They read about traveling the world instead of traveling the world.
They talk to people over FB or forums instead of making real life friends.
They endlessly text over Tinder or Match instead of insisting on meeting for a drink.
They endlessly post about the poor kid with cancer instead of giving their time or money to help.
They endlessly share their opinion on everything, without having any depth of knowledge or experience to know if they are right or wrong.

No other generation in history has had such an easy to use and socially acceptable action-fake tool available to them.

It's easy to be scared of life when you've never actually experienced it.

We've turned into a world of socially-retarded hermits who sit behind a screen living in fear.

Why in the world are you complaining?
If most people are really that weak-willed and gullible, then we might assume that their buying habits would share the same excessive bilge....

These are the same kind of people who will get knocked down by even the lamest reviews (even real reviews can be rather weak, not detailed), sufficient sales copy letter with action words and a funny sales promotion video, and when they get knocked down....

...they will buy ANYTHING.

These are the same kind of people who will buy anything their friends gush about. Books, clothes, music, food, get rich talks, investment packages. All of their movements and talk weaponising some Fastlaner's strategy.

Isn't that good for Fastlaners?

I can think of no advantageous battlefield such as this!
Speaking of battlefields, I was reading The Art of War by Sun Tzu(not The War of Art). It mentioned types of spies to use for battle, and among these classification of spies were:
a. spies from the enemy
Historically, they could be enemy officers who did not receive their deserved promotions, punished soldiers or officials who lust for bribes. Now, it can be workers and veterans who got laid off from their corporate jobs or failed business people.

These 'rejected workers' are actually very useful in the sense that they have knowledge on the terrain and field, and will provide insights and help to conquer it. They will have understanding of competitors and challenges. Sure beats entry level employees, huh?

Some of the best startups like Slack and AppSumo have succeeded well because they roped in people from giants like Facebook or Google.

b. Spies who are of the local populace.
In the past, it used to be countrymen who were sick of their rulers and wanted a change. Their king might be an indulgent rich a$$, feasting in bad times while his people starved. Their king might be sending troops to plunder his own people instead of protecting them.

Sounds familiar? How many businesses today 'plunder' from their very own customers instead of helping them?

Today, these 'spies' may be dissatisfied customers who hate the existing businesses so much that they will willingly support any army....or business that promises better value and rewards. They will provide everything, from money in sales to feedback, as long as your promises to them are honoured.

Most modern wars are actually won with intelligence from 'spying' rather than superior numbers and firepower.

 

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[MidwestLandlord]

Why in the world are you complaining?

...

Isn't that good for Fastlaners?

Not sure I was complaining, more just staying the obvious.

But it does concern me. Why?

Because I live in this world, and dislike how people are so plugged in that they have no ambition and extreme apathy.

I don't like that my daughter's are force fed this way of life by others and that this is the norm for their peers (whom will be their friends and romantic partners when they are older)

Plus, I have genuine empathy for my fellow humans, and I don't like seeing the vast majority of people throwing their lives away.

How many people say they get after it, take action, but never get anywhere? Excuses! I don't have time! I don't know what to do! I don't know how!

That's apathy. That's not being committed to the process.

And that's how most people operate. Action fakes and excuses galore.

Here's how it's done. Write a to do list, you're not allowed to go to bed until it's done. That's exactly what I do. If I still have work to do, I don't sleep until it's done. Period.

I suppose it's easier to just be an apathetic victim though.

So is it good for business? Maybe (i would argue it's not)

But it's sad to watch.

 

[masterneme]

Not sure I was complaining, more just staying the obvious.

But it does concern me. Why?

Because I live in this world, and dislike how people are so plugged in that they have no ambition and extreme apathy.

I don't like that my daughter's are force fed this way of life by others and that this is the norm for their peers (whom will be their friends and romantic partners when they are older)

Plus, I have genuine empathy for my fellow humans, and I don't like seeing the vast majority of people throwing their lives away.

How many people say they get after it, take action, but never get anywhere? Excuses! I don't have time! I don't know what to do! I don't know how!

That's apathy. That's not being committed to the process.

And that's how most people operate. Action fakes and excuses galore.

Here's how it's done. Write a to do list, you're not allowed to go to bed until it's done. That's exactly what I do. If I still have work to do, I don't sleep until it's done. Period.

I suppose it's easier to just be an apathetic victim though.

So is it good for business? Maybe (i would argue it's not)

But it's sad to watch.

Hey let me tell you something. I know how you feel. I worked for years as a hypnotist. I learned that being too empathic can screw you over because you see people all the time that could improve their lives easily but they don't, because they don't do what you know for sure it will help them. And that sucks...

People in general don't do what they need to get a better life, but you know what? THAT'S FINE. It's not your fault, it's not your responsability, IT'S THEIRS. You need to learn how to detach yourself from people or you'll lose your focus. We're in a time in which careless human beings can have A GREAT LIFE and it's thanks to people like you who observe the world, see what's the problem and fix it.

See... you can't change humans but you can change the world. When you improve the environment people adapt to that.

Can you imagine how would their lives be if we were still living in caves? They'd be all dead. Only the strongest and most aggresive/proactive survive.

Seriously think a bout that, if it wasn't for how much we've advanced as a Society, they wouldn't have ANY SINGLE chance to exercise their apathy.

Why is that? Because more people in the past focused on changing the world to give their fellow humans more freedom.

It's about choices, you can choose to make something great for humanity and be greatly rewarded, just take into account that they're not even aware how passive they're. YOU DID. And even when you tell/show/help them many will reject you...

Can you feel me? We often underestimate the power of DNA, the majority of people are hardwired to be lazy as f**k and to change that the only way would be to have them in an environment that will motivate them to brute-force the hell our of their genetics.

It's because of DNA that some people feel bad for how other people's (GOOD) lives are, it's the protection genes, we intuitively know that lazy people would die in the wilderness, BUT WE'RE NOT LIVING IN THE WILDERNESS!

You can change nothing if you keep your mind busy thinking about stuff you can't directly influence. You can only directly influence yourself.

You can't directly impact other people but you can INDIRECTLY influence them and they, with their freedom, will choose to change or not. There's no need to feel responsible, nor protective towards people because... honestly? the life they have is the best they could ever get with their faulty talents. They're alive and happy.

If you're alive and have a good life AND know that it could be better, massive Fastlane action will not only improve it, it will indirectly improve other people's too!

 

[Striver]

Some things I have learned as a Millennial:

1. Every generation thinks they are the best generation, and wants to talk about how great they are and talk badly about the others.

Spoken like a true Millennial! lol

 

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[The Abundant Man]

What would you suggest that millenials do then>

 

[luniac]

And yet mockery and humiliation can be a powerful motivator if channeled correctly. A guy I used to go to school with started DJ'ing in high school.

At first he was laughed at for being an unpopular geeky kid making a few beats on Fruity Loops. 'you will never be a real DJ, you suck, etc' they said. But he stuck at it. Starting by playing at school balls, then later local bars and so on.

Soon he was playing gigs regularly across the country. And just last year he signed with the local branch of an international record label company to record an album.

I feel receiving strong hate is infinitely better than being ignored altogether.

The geeky kid got a direct response to his activities, that must have been epic fuel for his drive