Oatmeal's Personal Development

[Oatmeal]

Hello everyone.

My name is Alvaro. I've been a lurker in these forums for about 4 months now and finally racked up the courage to post. I always thought that I had nothing of value to share. No skills, no passion, just a meager existence.

Until now. This thread will be where I post my physical improvement to keep myself accountable, and to show others that if I can reach my goals, then so can you.

Some backstory about myself. I'm 24 years old, born in Cuba, raised in good Ol' Texas. The only person who worked in my family growing up was my mother, who was a dentist in Cuba, but due to having very little knowledge of how things worked in this country and no understanding of English at the time, became a waitress to support a family of 4. I grew up poor, but my mom always made sure my brother and I were well taken care of. Growing up, I became addicted to video games. It got to the point where I was a 21 year old with no job, playing video games for 14-16 hours a day. I was depressed. I hated everything about my life and who I was. It got to the point where I wanted to die, but I couldn't kill myself. I just accepted that I was nothing. This mindset kept me from making friends or moving forward in life.

Things began to change when I turned 22. I got a job working at UPS and received a promotion quickly. I'm also married, live in my own apartment, and have a nice little doggy. I used to think reading was for nerds. Then I picked up TMF , and unscripted right after. Life. Changing. Stuff. Now I read 2-3 business / self help books each month. I've tried a few businesses, although they all failed. All good, I appreciated the experience and learned from each mistake. After my failed businesses, I began to try and act, feel, and look like the person I wanted to be in my head. Everyday I would meditate to keep my thoughts fresh, exercise to keep my body fit, and read to keep my mind educated.

But there was a problem. I was still addicted to video games.

This caused me to always regress into my former self. A scared, timid, shy person who found solace in a virtual fantasy. All my hard work would evaporate the moment the pull brought my back in. It felt inescapable. Something had to be done or I'd never get a firm grip on my life, no matter how many books I read or how much motivation I could find.

Last night, I uninstalled every single video game I own, and blocked every gaming website on my computer. Over 1 tb of memory. It was difficult as F*ck, but necessary to become who I want to be.

After reading Can't Hurt Me by David Goggins, I was intrigued by how far the human mind can push the body despite pain. I have made it my personal goal to not fear pain or uncomfort, but to relish it. I want to push my body to the point that I've never pushed it before. To do that, I will keep track of my activities on this thread and post a weekly update on my progress. I've never been afraid to fail myself. But I cannot fail others. That is why I want you, the reader, to keep me accountable. Call out my bs. If you see weakness in my update, let me know. I don't want to fall back into the chasm of self hatred again. I will not let that happen.

TLDR: Using this to keep track of my personal progress. Will start with some daily posts as a start, then move it weekly.

Thank you all for reading, and thank you MJ for such a great forum.

 

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[Oatmeal]

Day 1/365 - The Start

After years of waking up after 12pm, today I set my alarm to 8am. I could hardly sleep thinking about today. I had a plan set up. I'd wake up at 8 am, do yoga for 20 minutes, and go for a 1 hour run at a park nearby.

Did the yoga and felt my body thank me. I've never done yoga before, so I was stiff as a board. But after it was all done, I felt so awake and happy I made this decision. It was time to run.

You see, I've never enjoyed running long distance. I was great at sprinting, but the most I've ever ran in my life was 1.5 miles. Today, my goal was to run an hour straight. I got my shorts, water bottle, and apple watch ready.

I kept checking my watch as time went by, hoping it was almost over. Nope. Only 10 minutes in and I was gassed. Despite this, I told myself I wanted pain, and it just wasn't there yet. I made it my mission to keep going, even if I was going to pass out. 30 minutes, 2.8 miles into the run, I take a short break to drink some water. Holy shit, I'm so dizzy I can barely stand. I had to tell myself if I stay still for more than 10 seconds I'll just fall right over, so I have to keep running. Reaching the halfway point, I turn back and get ready to go home. Problem is, going back is uphill. Shit. Well, I wanted pain didn't I? At this point, my legs were spaghetti. I had to literally yell at myself while I was running, hoping there was nobody near me to hear my craziness. I kept telling myself "You can't quit. This pain is your reward, you earned it. Keep going. Keep pushing, and don't stop." There was a point going uphill that I stopped for a few seconds. I took this as a moment of weakness and channel my inner David Goggins. "No, you can't stop!"

5.27 miles. 1 hour run. Completed.

Holy shit guys, I couldn't believe it. It may not be much, but it's more than I've ever done or thought that I could do. No walking, just short water breaks. It's crazy what happens when failing is not an option.

After the run I took my wife to work and came home and did some more yoga for my legs. Again, my body was happy.

Now I'm off to work for the day. The plan is after work to get home and continue working on getting my Real Estate license for a few hours and go to bed early. I want to incorporate going to the gym into my schedule again. Reading an hour a day has already been going on for months, so I'm good there.

Well, that's it for now. Until tomorrow.

 

[Stargazer]

You sound like a man with a plan.

Just wanted to write that for all the self help books you wish to consume you might find the best story of 'doing what you have to do' is your mum's based on what you wrote in your first post.

Dan

 

[BellaPippin]

You have a plan yes, but good goals have to be attainable enough. Expecting to be able to run an hour straight as a habit is something you build into, not do from day 1. Yes you did it today, but you won't be able to sustain it long-term, will you? You have to ease into change or you risk becoming discouraged if you can't do it consistently, thinking you can't when it's just that you're just expecting too much too fast. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. Just a thought.

I was intrigued by how far the human mind can push the body despite pain.

Wait until you need the body to push the mind, that's the real challenge, lol


Edit- I don't mean to sound like I'm shooting you down, but I couldn't write it better. We'll keep you accountable but make sure you set goals that help you succeed too!

 

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[Oatmeal]

You sound like a man with a plan.

Just wanted to write that for all the self help books you wish to consume you might find the best story of 'doing what you have to do' is your mum's based on what you wrote in your first post.

Dan

Hey thanks for engaging. I will check out that book, appreciate the recommendation.

You have a plan yes, but good goals have to be attainable enough. Expecting to be able to run an hour straight as a habit is something you build into, not do from day 1. Yes you did it today, but you won't be able to sustain it long-term, will you? You have to ease into change or you risk becoming discouraged if you can't do it consistently, thinking you can't when it's just that you're just expecting too much too fast. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. Just a thought.



Wait until you need the body to push the mind, that's the real challenge, lol


Edit- I don't mean to sound like I'm shooting you down, but I couldn't write it better. We'll keep you accountable but make sure you set goals that help you succeed too!

You are 100% correct, I will go more in detail in my update for today. I definitely learned the hard way that pushing hard with no prior training is not something sustainable. Thank you for your advice.

 

[Oatmeal]

Day 2/365 - The realization
Well, I knew today wouldn't be like yesterday. I pushed my body hard. I developed strong pain on my right knee that made it difficult to bend it, which made my day at work very difficult. If I haven't mentioned it, I work at a UPS warehouse as a supervisor, so I work with heavy packages all day.

However, knowing my tendencies to quit when things are tough, I knew I couldn't just sit idly hoping my knee would heal. Nope, I'd go for a run anyway, just not a whole hour. Woke up at 8 am again, did yoga, and prepared for a jog. Instead of going to a park to jog, I went to a treadmill at my apartment and tried to run for at least 2 miles. I quickly realized that wasn't going to happen. I ran .1 miles and took a break. Tried again and ran another .1 miles. Yeah, this isn't good. Went on the elliptical for a few minutes but the pain was excruciating. I finished it off with a 5 minute ride on the stationary bike.

I've accepted the fact that I won't be running 1 hour everyday. For now at least. I am, however, very proud of the fact that I did something I never thought I could do. It gives me something to strive for. It shows that I have the potential to do things I didn't think were possible. The plan from now on is that after my knee heals, I'd like to take a different approach to my jog. Instead of jogging for an hour straight, I'll do 15 minutes of jogging, walk for 15 minutes, jog 15 minutes, and finish walking 15 minutes. That way I could condition myself for a longer jog.

I'd also like to take the time to say that this hasn't been easy at all. It's day 2 and I've already had thoughts about games. I went to youtube to look at helpful videos, and was recommended videos of the game I used to play showing all the new updates. I put a good amount of money into those games so seeing those thumbnails really sucked. Anyway, my motivation comes and goes throughout the day. I feel like I could be doing more. I still have a lot of extra time, and usually just spend it goofing around. What would you do in that situation?

Thanks for reading. See ya'll tomorrow. BTW it snowed in south Texas today, it was great!

 

[arl]

It seems like you already found out by yourself by hurting yourself, but I was going to suggest that running for 1 hour everyday is not healthy if your boyd is not prepared for that.

I'd recommend to follow a running program. Look for a race in your town in a few months, and prepare accordingly for that race following a plan. That's usually what works best for me to keep the motivation going.

 

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[Oatmeal]

It seems like you already found out by yourself by hurting yourself, but I was going to suggest that running for 1 hour everyday is not healthy if your boyd is not prepared for that.

I'd recommend to follow a running program. Look for a race in your town in a few months, and prepare accordingly for that race following a plan. That's usually what works best for me to keep the motivation going.

I've always thought about doing races, but never actually looked up any information near my area. Thank you for the suggestion, having a date to look forward to will definitely help my motivation.

 

[Oatmeal]

Day 3/365 - The Failure
I've dreaded this all day. No one wants to admit their failures, but I would be a fraud if I didn't continue updating this and hold myself accountable. I did absolutely nothing today. Woke up at 8 am, got up and brushed my teeth, washed my face, and put in some mouthwash hoping it would wake me up. My head felt heavy and I felt like I didn't get well rested. I made the mistake of sitting on my bed thinking of what I'd do next. I kept telling myself how much of a failure I'd be if I didn't get up and do yoga before running. Despite this, slowly my body crept towards the bed, my head found my pillow, and I went back to sleep.

It's embarrassing to have to write this down. I hyped this up on day one expecting to do this for a year, and on day 3 I managed to do nothing. Haven't even done my real estate course for a few days. I see who I want to be in life and it looks amazing, yet the road to that life is one I'm struggling to walk on. I'm still choosing comfort over change, and it's driving me crazy that I know what needs to be done, yet I can't convince myself to do it. How much pain, physical or emotional, must one feel to never doubt themselves again?

I must dissect what happened today so it doesn't happen again. Maybe I'm waking up to early at this point. I've always been used to sleeping late and waking up late. If I feel more rested, I should be more enticed to do my morning routine. Starting tomorrow, I'll wake up at 9 am and follow what I was doing before. I'm currently reading The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod, and he speaks about the importance of doing affirmations each morning. I've always thought it was strange to speak to one's self out loud, but what I'm doing isn't working, so I will begin to do that tomorrow.

So far, I want my morning routine to look like this. Wake up at 9, change into my gym clothes, brush teeth & mouthwash, rinse face, do affirmations, 20 minute yoga, 1 hour of alternating walk / jogging, and return home and meditate for 10 minutes. I'm not very organized to writing this down feels like it's helping me a lot.

Damn, I really didn't want to do this update at first. I even thought about just never coming back here again. Then I remembered MJ mentioning all the people that come with stories about how they're going to change their life and never return after a few days. I can't be that person. I will update this even if it sucks and no one reads or cares. You'll see me again tomorrow.

 

[reedracer]

Day 3 - The Failure
I've dreaded this all day. No one wants to admit their failures, but I would be a fraud if I didn't continue updating this and hold myself accountable. I did absolutely nothing today. Woke up at 8 am, got up and brushed my teeth, washed my face, and put in some mouthwash hoping it would wake me up. My head felt heavy and I felt like I didn't get well rested. I made the mistake of sitting on my bed thinking of what I'd do next. I kept telling myself how much of a failure I'd be if I didn't get up and do yoga before running. Despite this, slowly my body crept towards the bed, my head found my pillow, and I went back to sleep.

It's embarrassing to have to write this down. I hyped this up on day one expecting to do this for a year, and on day 3 I managed to do nothing. Haven't even done my real estate course for a few days. I see who I want to be in life and it looks amazing, yet the road to that life is one I'm struggling to walk on. I'm still choosing comfort over change, and it's driving me crazy that I know what needs to be done, yet I can't convince myself to do it. How much pain, physical or emotional, must one feel to never doubt themselves again?

I must dissect what happened today so it doesn't happen again. Maybe I'm waking up to early at this point. I've always been used to sleeping late and waking up late. If I feel more rested, I should be more enticed to do my morning routine. Starting tomorrow, I'll wake up at 9 am and follow what I was doing before. I'm currently reading The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod, and he speaks about the importance of doing affirmations each morning. I've always thought it was strange to speak to one's self out loud, but what I'm doing isn't working, so I will begin to do that tomorrow.

So far, I want my morning routine to look like this. Wake up at 9, change into my gym clothes, brush teeth & mouthwash, rinse face, do affirmations, 20 minute yoga, 1 hour of alternating walk / jogging, and return home and meditate for 10 minutes. I'm not very organized to writing this down feels like it's helping me a lot.

Damn, I really didn't want to do this update at first. I even thought about just never coming back here again. Then I remembered MJ mentioning all the people that come with stories about how they're going to change their life and never return after a few days. I can't be that person. I will update this even if it sucks and no one reads or cares. You'll see me again tomorrow.

It's a muscle. You haven't failed until you quit for good. Get back up and go again!

 

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[Oatmeal]

Day 6/365 - Resurgence
Hey, it's been a few days. Feeling a bit tired, so I'll make it quick. Saturday was a bunch of nothing, still felt pretty crappy and down. Kept thinking of what I needed to do to break my bad habits and form the good ones I wanted. Sunday came around and I went on a 3 mile hike with a friend, which really made me happy getting to leave my house.

Then it happened. I finished reading The Miracle morning on Sunday and realized that everything I've ever done has had no organization, just long term goals. "I want to become a computer programmer, I want to be a businessman, I want to be a bodybuilder," were all once something I said I'd do. I envisioned these things in my mind and only saw the end, which of course gives motivation. Then the difficult part begins, and the motivation goes away. This happens when you don't have a plan and and take the "I'll do it when I get to it" approach, the approach I've taken all my life.

Well, that changed today. I followed through with the morning routine I wanted, and it felt amazing. I pushed my wake up time a bit farther to 10 am and follow the Miracle Morning routine. Visualize for 5 minutes, yoga for 20 minutes, and affirmations on my way to the park for 5 minutes. I also read at least an hour a day. The only thing I need to do is keep a daily journal, but for now this will do.

I found a 5k coming up next month that I'm going to do and invited 3 of my friends to join me. They were all on board. I began my endurance training by starting at a more sustainable pace than my day 1 5.2 mile run. 1 minute of walking and 1 minute of running for 30 minutes. Today I was able to go for 2.5 miles. Next week, if it feels good, I'll do 1 minute of walking and 2 minutes of running. I think I'll be ready for that 5k next month no problem.

I'm feeling really confident in myself. I don't feel this way too often but god damn, things are looking good. It feels nice having a plan to follow. I'm even looking at different jobs to apply to until I get something going business wise. My right knee still hurts, and it definitely held me back on my run today, but I must push through the pain.

Well, that will be all for today. I hope all of you reach the goals you set out for yourselves. Until next time.