I am tried of settling & figuring out how to move forward

[stjohanne]

Hello, my name is Johanne, 22 and I am already feeling like I am letting my life pass me by. I realize that I am not where I want to be in life or doing the things that I think will make me happy. I will soon be a junior in college, it really hit me how much I dread school with all the exams, long essays, and many unnecessary courses. Also, I work at a fast chain making about $300-$400 a month, and after working there for a little over a year, All I have to show for it is an accumulation of $8k, from investing, working, and saving. I don't want to sound like I am really sad, ingrateful, or looking for empathy. I guess what I am saying is that I am TRIED of being on the Slowlane. I feel like I tried and failed multiple things such as Youtube, TikTok, apply for multiple jobs, surveys, online store... but after failing these things I started to realize they are not the kind of things I see in my future or something that I really want to do for a living; I don't like being in the spotlight, the process of getting a job suck, and surveys are a waste of time. Recently, after watching a steve jobs documentary I really felt like dropping out of college, quitting my job, and move somewhere in silicon valley (preferable San Francisco) btw I live in Florida so that's pretty far... but I am scared and this would be very drastic of me... so I figured I would just start small; learn to drive, buy a car, and since I am almost done, finish school, then move to silicon valley. basically putting my dreams on hold

but I also decided that I will learn code to build an app that is similar to Snapchat and WhatsApp (if the two had a baby) but it will mostly focus on group messaging. but IDK if this is something I really want to do or am I am just doing it just to do it (no real passion), like the other things I tried and failed. regardless tho I started to try learning to code (the lowest level with blocks) and I like it. But I worry that I may be moving a little too slow and will not publish the app in 8 months' time. hence, i thought maybe I should get a programer but I also know I do not have the funds to hire someone to create it, plus I wanted to try this coding-an-app thing on my own from scratch. IDK if any of this was understandable or just me rambling (which I really needed), but I don't really have much friends and this forum is literally the first and only place which I opened up to.

 

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[ZF Lee]

Jo @tvkujeppi, vjeplt gus tjesoph.
Huuf vu sencmi e cov, cav veli edduapv ug xjev zua dep fu vufez epf vunussux.

Xi nez puv ci xjisi xi xepv vu ci vufez, cav vunussux? Neli vjev foggisipv.

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Iwipvaemmz, zua’mm tvepf e civvis djepdi ug gopfoph zuas xez, et zua tvonamevi zuas cseop epf dupgofipdi.

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Epf vjev’t katv upi ug nz tvafz gsenixuslt.

Jesf xusl? Cusoph?
Zaq, cav ev mietv vjiti esi tviqt vjev O dep veli

O’wi vjuahjv ug raovvoph dummihi cigusi vu fu nusi catopitt tvagg, cav vjip O siemotif og O fofp’v jewi ipuahj fotdoqmopi us qmeppoph vu fu tdjuum xusl, O qsucecmz xuamfp’v jewi ipuahj fotdoqmopi us qmeppoph gus siem-mogi catopitt.

epf nuwi tunixjisi op tomodup wemmiz (qsigisecmi Tep Gsepdotdu) cvx O mowi op Gmusofe tu vjev't qsivvz ges... cav O en tdesif epf vjot xuamf ci wisz fsetvod ug ni... tu O gohasif O xuamf katv tvesv tnemm; miesp vu fsowi, caz e des, epf topdi O en emnutv fupi, gopotj tdjuum, vjip nuwi vu tomodup wemmiz.

Zua dep xusl upmopi...zua fup’v piif vu nuwi vu Tep Gsepdotdu. Ep optepimz iyqiptowi qmedi, iwip og zua sipv.

O xet siefoph Ehuse’t pixtmivvist, epf upi finuhseqjod djephi vjiz’wi puvif ot vjev nusi qiuqmi esi nuwoph uav ug nekus dovoit vu tacascep esiet. Duamf ci fai vu cuvj optepi dutvt ug mowoph epf DUWOF-19 mudlfuxp viptoupt.

O giim moli O vsoif epf geomif namvoqmi vjopht tadj et Zuavaci, VolVul, eqqmz gus namvoqmi kuct, taswizt, upmopi tvusi... cav egvis geomoph vjiti vjopht O tvesvif vu siemobi vjiz esi puv vji lopf ug vjopht O tii op nz gavasi us tunivjoph vjev O siemmz xepv vu fu gus e mowoph

ZV epf VolVul esi neslivoph djeppimt, puv vji ipf-ov-emm.

Xjev ot nusi onqusvepv ot vji dupvipv-xjodj dunit gsun zuas neop uggist epf qsufadv. Ni vjoplt zua jef qsufadv qsucmint...

cav O emtu fidofif vjev O xomm miesp dufi vu caomf ep eqq vjev ot tonomes vu Tpeqdjev epf XjevtEqq (og vji vxu jef e cecz) cav ov xomm nutvmz gudat up hsuaq nittehoph. cav OFL og vjot ot tunivjoph O siemmz xepv vu fu us en O en katv fuoph ov katv vu fu ov (pu siem qettoup), moli vji uvjis vjopht O vsoif epf geomif.

Op mohjv ug vji sidipv Vxovvis jedl, zua nohjv xepv vu muul vu tumwi vji qeop-quopv ug tidasovz gus viyv nittehoph.

 

[stjohanne]

UNH XUX! @BG Mii O siemmz xet puv iyqidvoph vjev O eqqsidoevi vji voni epf iggusv zua vuul vu xsovi vjot gus ni. Movisemmz csieloph fuxp iwiszvjoph epf effoph zuas opqav, vjiz'si emm hsiev efwodi (O sief ov moli vjsii vonit emsiefz). Ov nelit ni giim mitt emupi vjev tuniupi edvaemmz vuul vjios voni vu sief ov itqidoemmz topdi O xet siemmz giimoph fuxp vjev fez, vjeplt.