Wozza
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Hi Guys,
I have been a lurker in this forum for quite sometime now. I have read MJ's book along with many other business/self help books and guess what? It seems nothing actually will get me to focus and take directed action.
Im 34 years old, wife, 2 kids (6yrs and 2yrs) and from the UK. 10 years ago I was doing pretty well for myself, I had a small online retail business with a small 'real world' store as well. Business was good, not spectacular but pretty decent.
A few years passed and I closed the retail business (larger companies were killing my margins) to focus more on helping other people setup and design their own online stores/websites. At the time I saw an opportunity to make more money helping other business owners. I studied web design in college and was always good with computers and code from a young age, so I went back to this, took a few more courses and setup shop as a new web designer.
With this I moved my business to a nice office located in our town. Around this time our daughter was born and I noticed a distinct change in my outlook since then. I became more fearful, bit more less 'happy go lucky' and worried constantly about the future. I decided to downsize, sold off one of our cars (on finance) and moved home to a larger family home based just outside of town with room for a home office. I cancelled my lease with current office and switched to working from home full time.
Another year or 2 passes and the web design business is just about steady, but not enough to support my small family. My wife was not working then and was a stay at home mom. I took a gamble on some online retail business ventures involving some new suppliers and both new businesses failed and left me with some debt, disgruntled customers and a real hit to my confidence. The supplier was paid up front for customer orders and were drop shipping the goods to the customer, this worked well for a few months, but when the supplier went bust with around 15K of orders and my pre paid funds to them, I had to close the business and attempt to refund customers out of my own pocket. Some I'm still paying back to this day. I also owe a good chunk of money to my Dad who lent me some funds to start one of the businesses.
During this time I was still operating the web design business and it took off again with some larger projects coming my way, however this little surge was just a temporary boost.
About a year or so later our son was born, the if Im honest, the PANIC really started to hit.
I was worried about everything. The future, our bills, my creditors, past customers of the failed retail ventures, I felt like a failure and even contemplated suicide as I was convinced my family would be better off with the 500K life insurance money than with me. So far at business, I sucked. I had dug a big hole for myself and was terrified of dragging them down with me.
Fast forward to today, still operating the web design business from home, clients are happy and I have good return business and some new web design jobs on the horizon. HOWEVER, its not where I want to be. I seem stuck trading time for money and fear I will be if I dont make a change NOW. Finances are not great, getting by and thats its.
Also, working from home now is getting a little more strained with 2 kids in the house at certain times. My wife got a job, she works shifts and Im working now more at nights and early mornings as I look after the kids while she works.
I feel like I have lost my direction.
Im very frustrated at myself.
I feel like I KNOW what to do, however I dont know where to put my energy.
I dont really have passion for anything at the moment.
I know Im capable and will ing to work hard.
However I cant seem to get traction with any idea.
I had big dreams as a kid, I feel now at 34 I have done nothing special with my life.
This post is a form of mental masturbation as its been a goal of mine to at least admit to the world in some form as to how I feel.
I have ideas for SEO businessess, creating a blog, digital products, kindle books and more. Each gets me excisited, but I fizzle out within about 24hrs as I cant F*cking decide which niche/direction to divert all my energy to.
Im lost on the sea of opportunity, without a rudder.
Thanks for reading..
I have been a lurker in this forum for quite sometime now. I have read MJ's book along with many other business/self help books and guess what? It seems nothing actually will get me to focus and take directed action.
Im 34 years old, wife, 2 kids (6yrs and 2yrs) and from the UK. 10 years ago I was doing pretty well for myself, I had a small online retail business with a small 'real world' store as well. Business was good, not spectacular but pretty decent.
A few years passed and I closed the retail business (larger companies were killing my margins) to focus more on helping other people setup and design their own online stores/websites. At the time I saw an opportunity to make more money helping other business owners. I studied web design in college and was always good with computers and code from a young age, so I went back to this, took a few more courses and setup shop as a new web designer.
With this I moved my business to a nice office located in our town. Around this time our daughter was born and I noticed a distinct change in my outlook since then. I became more fearful, bit more less 'happy go lucky' and worried constantly about the future. I decided to downsize, sold off one of our cars (on finance) and moved home to a larger family home based just outside of town with room for a home office. I cancelled my lease with current office and switched to working from home full time.
Another year or 2 passes and the web design business is just about steady, but not enough to support my small family. My wife was not working then and was a stay at home mom. I took a gamble on some online retail business ventures involving some new suppliers and both new businesses failed and left me with some debt, disgruntled customers and a real hit to my confidence. The supplier was paid up front for customer orders and were drop shipping the goods to the customer, this worked well for a few months, but when the supplier went bust with around 15K of orders and my pre paid funds to them, I had to close the business and attempt to refund customers out of my own pocket. Some I'm still paying back to this day. I also owe a good chunk of money to my Dad who lent me some funds to start one of the businesses.
During this time I was still operating the web design business and it took off again with some larger projects coming my way, however this little surge was just a temporary boost.
About a year or so later our son was born, the if Im honest, the PANIC really started to hit.
I was worried about everything. The future, our bills, my creditors, past customers of the failed retail ventures, I felt like a failure and even contemplated suicide as I was convinced my family would be better off with the 500K life insurance money than with me. So far at business, I sucked. I had dug a big hole for myself and was terrified of dragging them down with me.
Fast forward to today, still operating the web design business from home, clients are happy and I have good return business and some new web design jobs on the horizon. HOWEVER, its not where I want to be. I seem stuck trading time for money and fear I will be if I dont make a change NOW. Finances are not great, getting by and thats its.
Also, working from home now is getting a little more strained with 2 kids in the house at certain times. My wife got a job, she works shifts and Im working now more at nights and early mornings as I look after the kids while she works.
I feel like I have lost my direction.
Im very frustrated at myself.
I feel like I KNOW what to do, however I dont know where to put my energy.
I dont really have passion for anything at the moment.
I know Im capable and will ing to work hard.
However I cant seem to get traction with any idea.
I had big dreams as a kid, I feel now at 34 I have done nothing special with my life.
This post is a form of mental masturbation as its been a goal of mine to at least admit to the world in some form as to how I feel.
I have ideas for SEO businessess, creating a blog, digital products, kindle books and more. Each gets me excisited, but I fizzle out within about 24hrs as I cant F*cking decide which niche/direction to divert all my energy to.
Im lost on the sea of opportunity, without a rudder.
Thanks for reading..
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