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FEAR - as you pursue financial freedom

MsMoney

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I am so very glad that this thread is here! I was just going to start one on this very subject....

I realize that the last 3 1/2 years of my life have been a journey to not allow fear to dictate my life. I have grown in an understanding of myself and what I will have in my life, without fear. For me, I have such a strong connection with my spiritual side because of what I've gone thru. Anything you can possibly think of, happened.

I believe, in some way, my life was getting "cleaned" out. All the b.s. was being removed whether I wanted it to or not.

I cannot tell you how happy I am in my life at this very moment. I am excited about what the future has in store for me. I am in peace with any obstacles that may come my way, as I know that everything happens for a reason.

I believe that I am unconditionally loved & protected. Every night when my head hits the pillow I say words of thanks & praise for everything I have right now in my life.

What do I fear? I fear nothing. I say this simply and humbly.....I wish this for you who are reading it right now. Can you go thru the fire to get there? Just know that I did and it's worth it!
 
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Happy

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I’ll show my age by quoting lyrics from Janis Joplin’s song “Me and Bobby McGeeâ€
““Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loseâ€

These words have intrigued me, and at times haunted me, from the very first time I heard them.

I’ve seen penniless immigrants amass substantial fortunes because they had very little to lose. They set goals and worked hard to obtain the goals; without having the monkey on their back that they “may†lose everything and become penniless.

They more we have - the more fear, we may have, of losing it. This becomes more of a reality if we are responsible for bringing children into the world. Lets stop and think about this for a second… By allowing fear to control our reactions to opportunities, are we doing our children a disservice and imbedding the same fear of failure into their lives? How often do parents encourage their children to take risks? As parents and/or mentors are we leading by example? I struggle with this on a regular basis.

I don’t want this post to get too long and boring, so I will close with this idea “Diversify – Don't put all your eggs (Hopes & Dreams) in one basket."


PEERless – Where you thinking about the project called “one red paperclip?â€

Life is Not a Dress Rehearsal ~ Sheri Rose Shepherd

Enjoy the Ride!
Happy
 

memenode

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Freedom is lack of fear, pure and simple. This also explains why fear is used when the goal is to strip people of their freedom.

But when you no longer have fear, you can do anything because you know that whatever happens you will always retain your own self, your mind, which you always have absolute control over. Soon then you start to realize that failure is nothing but a piece of information which you can use to succeed.

The turning point for me in terms of realizing this on a really deep and emotional level was the scene in the movie "V for Vendetta" where Evey is asked whether she is willing to cooperate and she said no even though that meant she'll be executed behind the chemical sheds. What made this scene so incredibly powerful is when the detainer then said to her that "You have no fear anymore. You are completely free."

I still shiver at the thought of these words. "You have no fear anymore. You are completely free."

Of course. It's hard to fully and completely apply this theory to your life. I can preach how this is the key to true freedom, but I cannot yet guarantee that I will feel no fear or that I will never be paralyzed by it in a given situation simply because I haven't been tested yet. But the fact that I now understand and poses this insight into the nature of freedom as opposed to fear makes me so much more likely to just go ahead and pursue what I want despite the risks.

Speaking of worst case scenario, what is a worst case scenario really? Being in jail, threatened by a death sentence by a totalitarian government because you dared to speak up when you weren't allowed to, for example (this sort of thing happens in China folks) and with no way to escape. This may seem too extreme, but consider this. If you can imagine such a worst case scenario and believe that you wouldn't lose yourself in such a situation (because you don't have to, nobody can take away your control over your own mind), then all of the other slip ups in life no longer seem like a big deal, do they?

So why bother with fear at all? Just banish it 100% so it doesn't come in your way ever again. Focus on more positive and productive emotions instead. Of course, lack of fear does not entail lack of caution. It does not mean making decisions on a whim and with no rational thought to back them up. It just means not letting fear have anything to do with your making of decisions.

Does that make sense?

So what is my biggest fear? Well.. it should really be the fear itself. While I hold no illusion that I developed to the point of having no fear at all I wont bother giving it more thought. When I face my fear I'll know it and hopefully I'll have the guts enough to tell it to bugger the hell off, cause I have a life to lead!

Cheers
 

SaraK

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Freedom is lack of fear, pure and simple. This also explains why fear is used when the goal is to strip people of their freedom.

But when you no longer have fear, you can do anything because you know that whatever happens you will always retain your own self, your mind, which you always have absolute control over. Soon then you start to realize that failure is nothing but a piece of information which you can use to succeed.

The turning point for me in terms of realizing this on a really deep and emotional level was the scene in the movie "V for Vendetta" where Evey is asked whether she is willing to cooperate and she said no even though that meant she'll be executed behind the chemical sheds. What made this scene so incredibly powerful is when the detainer then said to her that "You have no fear anymore. You are completely free."

I still shiver at the thought of these words. "You have no fear anymore. You are completely free."

Of course. It's hard to fully and completely apply this theory to your life. I can preach how this is the key to true freedom, but I cannot yet guarantee that I will feel no fear or that I will never be paralyzed by it in a given situation simply because I haven't been tested yet. But the fact that I now understand and poses this insight into the nature of freedom as opposed to fear makes me so much more likely to just go ahead and pursue what I want despite the risks.

Speaking of worst case scenario, what is a worst case scenario really? Being in jail, threatened by a death sentence by a totalitarian government because you dared to speak up when you weren't allowed to, for example (this sort of thing happens in China folks) and with no way to escape. This may seem too extreme, but consider this. If you can imagine such a worst case scenario and believe that you wouldn't lose yourself in such a situation (because you don't have to, nobody can take away your control over your own mind), then all of the other slip ups in life no longer seem like a big deal, do they?

So why bother with fear at all? Just banish it 100% so it doesn't come in your way ever again. Focus on more positive and productive emotions instead. Of course, lack of fear does not entail lack of caution. It does not mean making decisions on a whim and with no rational thought to back them up. It just means not letting fear have anything to do with your making of decisions.

Does that make sense?

So what is my biggest fear? Well.. it should really be the fear itself. While I hold no illusion that I developed to the point of having no fear at all I wont bother giving it more thought. When I face my fear I'll know it and hopefully I'll have the guts enough to tell it to bugger the hell off, cause I have a life to lead!

Cheers

For the most part I agree with what you're saying, though I don't think it's practically possible to banish your fear 100%. Fear is an emotion that can rear it's head any time. That being said, I think it definitely should be your goal to OVERCOME your fear 100% of the time. It's all about being in the driver's seat of your own self and not letting the emotions be in control.
 
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fanocks2003

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All fear ultimately comes down to fear of death. Fear of the thought of not existing anymore. Fear of the ultimate outcome of a particular happening. Prove me wrong.

Fear of losing material posessions is rooted in fear of death.
Fear of being disliked is rooted in fear of death.
Fear of.......

Etc.

Death is every fears ultimate common denominator.
 

Happy

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All fear ultimately comes down to fear of death. Fear of the thought of not existing anymore. Fear of the ultimate outcome of a particular happening. Prove me wrong.

Fear of losing material posessions is rooted in fear of death.
Fear of being disliked is rooted in fear of death.
Fear of.......

Etc.

Death is every fears ultimate common denominator.

Would you consider the fear of speaking in public to be rooted in the fear of death? I would say it is rooted in the fear of the unknown.

That which I fear today may be an asset tomorrow.
 

fanocks2003

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Would you consider the fear of speaking in public to be rooted in the fear of death? I would say it is rooted in the fear of the unknown.

That which I fear today may be an asset tomorrow.

My view is that every fear has a common denominator in death. I might be wrong. The death is the ultimate unknown as I see it.
 
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SaraK

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My view is that every fear has a common denominator in death. I might be wrong. The death is the ultimate unknown as I see it.

I guess this is true if you follow the fear a few steps along. For example:

Afraid to do something socially unpopular because of a fear of being rejected by friends and society.
Afraid of being rejected because afraid of being alone.
Afraid of being alone because chance of survival is less (and dying greater) when you're alone. (This was more true in our distant evolutionary past than it is now, but the instinct remains).

I listened to an Anthony Robbins CD a few weeks ago and the thing I remember most from it was when he said that there are two emotions that drive us: FEAR and DESIRE. The point he was trying to make was that we should work to change our motivation from fear to desire (ex: if you want to lose weight, focus on how hot you'll look when you reach your goal, not how ugly you look when you're overweight). Replace fear motivation with desire motivation.

As I was writing this post it occurred to me: the survival instinct stems from both a FEAR of death as well as a DESIRE to continue living and doing things we enjoy.

The more I think about it, the more I think that Happy was right... the common denominator of all fears is fear of the unknown. Fear of death is the step before that. So I'm going to add one last line to my example from above:

Afraid to do something socially unpopular because of a fear of being rejected by friends and society.
Afraid of being rejected because afraid of being alone.
Afraid of being alone because chance of survival is less (and dying greater) when you're alone.
Afraid to die because of the unknowns: what is after death? what could I have done in life if only I'd lived longer?
 

fanocks2003

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I guess this is true if you follow the fear a few steps along. For example:

Afraid to do something socially unpopular because of a fear of being rejected by friends and society.
Afraid of being rejected because afraid of being alone.
Afraid of being alone because chance of survival is less (and dying greater) when you're alone. (This was more true in our distant evolutionary past than it is now, but the instinct remains).

I listened to an Anthony Robbins CD a few weeks ago and the thing I remember most from it was when he said that there are two emotions that drive us: FEAR and DESIRE. The point he was trying to make was that we should work to change our motivation from fear to desire (ex: if you want to lose weight, focus on how hot you'll look when you reach your goal, not how ugly you look when you're overweight). Replace fear motivation with desire motivation.

As I was writing this post it occurred to me: the survival instinct stems from both a FEAR of death as well as a DESIRE to continue living and doing things we enjoy.

The more I think about it, the more I think that Happy was right... the common denominator of all fears is fear of the unknown. Fear of death is the step before that. So I'm going to add one last line to my example from above:

Afraid to do something socially unpopular because of a fear of being rejected by friends and society.
Afraid of being rejected because afraid of being alone.
Afraid of being alone because chance of survival is less (and dying greater) when you're alone.
Afraid to die because of the unknowns: what is after death? what could I have done in life if only I'd lived longer?

In the movie "Alexander", Alexander says "If you conquer fear, you'll conquer death". I think death is a fundamental thing in our lives. Only when we conquer the fear of dying would we be brave enough to do exactly everything we wanted to do (good and bad things).

This discussion is very stimulating to be a part of:).
 
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Jill

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All fear ultimately comes down to fear of death. Fear of the thought of not existing anymore. Fear of the ultimate outcome of a particular happening. Prove me wrong. . . Death is every fears ultimate common denominator.
I disagree. A healthy fear of danger is a good thing, as it keeps us alive.

But one need look no further than the statistics on worldwide suicide to see that at least 2% of all deaths worldwide (those who are successful in their attempts) are people who would rather die than face loss, humiliation, depression, or some other emotion - real or perceived. It may be statistically insignificant at first glance. But I think it is a good indication that one's greatest fears are largely based on one's greatest values.

For instance, I highly valued the respect, admiration and appreciation of my (now late) parents. So I made many difficult decisions to prevent doing anything to disappoint them.

If one values comfort above all else, then losing one's comfortable home may seem worse to them than death.

If one values accomplishment / victory above all else, then he would rather die (in the battlefield, for instance) than lose. I recently read a statistic that a large group of olympic and other world-class athletes were polled: "If you could take a substance that would guarantee that you would win every contest you attempted, and set records along the way, BUT you would definitely die within 365 days of doing so, would you still take them?" Approx 75% said "Yes, they would".

While that's not something I understand, personally, I'm not going to judge anyone whose values are different from mine. Once we understand what one values most in life, then we can understand how to motivate them (and ourselves).

Footnote: As an aside, statistically speaking, people of "Faith" are also typically far less afraid of death than others who purport no faith-based belief system.
 

SaraK

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I disagree. A healthy fear of danger is a good thing, as it keeps us alive.

But one need look no further than the statistics on worldwide suicide to see that at least 2% of all deaths worldwide (those who are successful in their attempts) are people who would rather die than face loss, humiliation, depression, or some other emotion - real or perceived. It may be statistically insignificant at first glance. But I think it is a good indication that one's greatest fears are largely based on one's greatest values.

For instance, I highly valued the respect, admiration and appreciation of my (now late) parents. So I made many difficult decisions to prevent doing anything to disappoint them.

If one values comfort above all else, then losing one's comfortable home may seem worse to them than death.

If one values accomplishment / victory above all else, then he would rather die (in the battlefield, for instance) than lose. I recently read a statistic that a large group of olympic and other world-class athletes were polled: "If you could take a substance that would guarantee that you would win every contest you attempted, and set records along the way, BUT you would definitely die within 365 days of doing so, would you still take them?" Approx 75% said "Yes, they would".

While that's not something I understand, personally, I'm not going to judge anyone whose values are different from mine. Once we understand what one values most in life, then we can understand how to motivate them (and ourselves).

Footnote: As an aside, statistically speaking, people of "Faith" are also typically far less afraid of death than others who purport no faith-based belief system.

:iagree: That's a really good point. Everyone has fears, but what we fear THE MOST is what we need to conquer in order to not be controlled/limited by our fear. For a lot of people that is death, like Fanocks said. But it can be other things too. When I read Fanock's post initially my first reaction was "That's not true"... because death isn't something I'm particularly afraid of.

A year or two ago I consciously identified my greatest fear and have since been running scenarios in my head of "how would I deal with that situation if it happened" and I am not as afraid of it as I used to be. Not totally free of the fear yet, but I've made significant progress. Although I think I would still feel afraid if faced with that situation, I would be able to control my fear and act according to how I choose to act rather than purely out of reaction.

I agree with what Jill said about faith... part of what makes faith so powerful is that it helps conquer the fear of death.
 

memenode

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For the most part I agree with what you're saying, though I don't think it's practically possible to banish your fear 100%. Fear is an emotion that can rear it's head any time. That being said, I think it definitely should be your goal to OVERCOME your fear 100% of the time. It's all about being in the driver's seat of your own self and not letting the emotions be in control.

Though I think aspiring to banish it might lead to it being overcome, but I suppose this might be one of those things that depends from person to person. What may be universal to all though is that to overcome fear one must identify his or her fears and then just counter them with values (s)he feels strongly about, because as Napoleon Hill says, very highly emotionalized thoughts are the ones which impress on our subconscious first, and our subconscious is in a way a foundation of our conscious.

That said, I agree that rational mind should be in the drivers seat, but I have to point out that emotions are still important as guiding signals. They tell us which consequences of our actions we like and which we dislike, so that we can adjust them to accomplish something we really desire. They, of course, also tell us what we feel is "right" and "wrong" in the world, thus defining our morals. But it's true that while emotions are the fire that thursts us in one or the other direction, a rational mind always has to have the last word. :)

I also agree that fundamentally fear is the fear of unknown. And I almost agree that fear of danger is beneficial. I just wouldn't quite call that fear. I would call that "caution", which is perhaps a miniaturized and much more rationalized version of fear, but one that's much less or at all destructive towards us. It's when one knows that something could hurt him, but instead of shivering at the thought of it, merely adjusts his actions to avoid that danger. That's fear vs. caution. :)

Cheers
 
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AroundTheWorld

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I'm curious....

has your (all readers) view of fear or level of fear changed in the last year or two?
 

PaulRobert

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I'm curious....

has your (all readers) view of fear or level of fear changed in the last year or two?

Definitely-

My view of fear has changed dramatically. When I started investing in stocks I had a fear of losing money; what happened- I let my emotions get to me and I lost money. I changed my tactic, started investing wisely and started to make progress.

My next fear was fear of being criticized or judge by others. I have since changed due to working on my people skills, stop caring what others think or say, and started challenging myself in my daily tasks.

I got over my fears by thinking if I don't do this now, I will never get this opportunity in my life again. Fear holds people back from their true successes. When you stop fearing you start living. (IMHO)



Here is an example-

You are on top of a 45 story building, you have two ways of getting down- using the stairs or rappelling down the side. You begin to analyze and come to a conclusion that rappelling is more dangerous and scarier aka- Fear. Now, you see others rappelling down, yelling and having a great time. You think to yourself "Hmmm, Why are they having so much fun?" Why? Here is the reason, they see that this opportunity may never show up and take advantage of the present. After they are done rappelling, they have a new experience and probably a fun rush of adrenaline. They are the ones that do not fear, but take educated risks and are not held back by the "What ifs in life" They overcome their fears by doing exactly what they fear.

So go ahead, try that jump, you might not fear it after you try.
 

czach41

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What do I fear most right now?
Not being able to pay my rent. This will happen if I lose my job.

Worst possible outcome?

I sell all my stuff, and either live in my car or couch hop in some of my buddie's places. I can think of a lot worse things than going through that. I've got nothing to lose! Woohoo!

Maybe I am naive, but I surely am fearless these days.

I'm 24, with no dependents, and have around $10,000 in student loan debt. BRING IT LIFE!
 
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Caesarion

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I'm at an interesting place. I have had a lot of things and I lost them ALL. Homes, multiple properties, cars, insurance, businesses. At times I thought I would go crazy. But hey, I'm still here. I have the same mind that created all those things before. I'm grateful I have good health to start over and I didn't drink and smoke my problems away while it all happened. I no longer have no fear of losing material things. I feel like now, my fears are more human to human. (What people think, not being able to make a comeback, etc.)
 

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