Hello all...please forgive me if this is a long rambling soliloquy. I'm hoping that by putting these thoughts out on the board, it'll help shock me into action..force me to deal with issues I've tried to ignore that have led to a downward spiral. To give you an idea where I am, let me tell you how I got here.
I was first introduced to TMF by one of my brothers back in early 2014 (I was 53 at the time). He told me about this amazing book he heard about, although in retrospect, I doubt if he ever read all of it. I did, immediately.
Unfortunately, I'm not much of a reader. My mind drifts easily, when I read. So, unless I'm reading something I really enjoy, it's a major chore. However, I read TMF quickly. As a wantrepeneur, I saw this book as a way to help get over the professional and financial hump and get my own Lambo...actually, I'm more of a Porsche guy, but you get the idea.
When I read TMF, I was a year removed from a fairly successful run in the mortgage industry as an MLO. I got in a year before 9/11. I had NO financial background, but due to the freewheeling nature of the industry then, even a novice like myself was able to make enough money to feel like I was ballin!
9/11 seems to be the time the company I worked at took off. It seems we had a license to print money! As a guy who never made more than $55k or so in a year, I was starting to pull in $100k+ and after being pretty frugal with my money for a few years, I felt confident enough to start rewarding my efforts.
I bought a Boxster, lots of expensive clothes, Rolex, traveled some, and felt that I had arrived. Along with that, I was able to use my good fortune to help others. I gave charitably and helped my family, whenever necessary. In my circle of friends and family, I was probably the most successful financially...and I'm talking no more than $200k.
I worked at a firm where if you WEREN'T making six figures, people looked at you kinda sideways. There wasn't much said, but you could sense it. I got in at my company on the ground floor as one of the first employees, and as such, I saw lots of people come afterwards. Soon, I saw many others easily eclipse my earnings, but at the time, I was so busy having a good time...think Wolf of Wall St kinda fun..I shrugged it off. In my mind, this money machine was never gonna stop. It did.
I like to pat myself on the back and say I saw the 08 Recession a year before it happened and tried to avoid it by going into the management of the company and taking a nice salary, vs working for what I saw were my dwindling commissions.
By that time, I had 2 homes and had racked up tons of debt from living large, and although I knew I needed to make some changes, I never did. At the very least, I needed to downsize, but I kept believing that my financial situation was going to make a turn for the better.
Unfortunately, I didn't network much, didn't foster relationships both inside nor outside my company, so instead of having a safe place to land as this plane was going down in flames, I went down with it. Over the next few years, I lost everything..both homes, pawned my Roley, relationships..my girlfriend moved on, and I just kinda withdrew into a shell...but I somehow still assumed I'd find my way out. I tried saying positive things to myself to get motivated, but nothing seemed to work.
Fast forward to now, I've had more dead ends than I need to mention. I've found every scam job on Craigslist, to the point that I was paralyzed with inaction and fear of trying something that MIGHT NOT work.
Taking assessment of my skills, I like to think I'm a good person..kinda introverted, and truly love people no matter race, creed, orientation, etc..I don't have a degree, I'm somewhat lazy, and have few marketable skills. However, I'm creative as hell...I was a fine arts major in college, but my creativity manifests itself in many ways...often in areas I have no expertise in, just a good idea.
My challenge is to find my way. I'm lost professionally and I'm at an age where I should be helping others and looking towards retirement, but I find myself starting over yet again, and unable to help myself. Although I'm homeless and would be on the streets if not for the kindness of my current girlfriend and family, I live somewhat comfortably (this is part of the problem)...don't miss any meals, still have a car, but I'm not living, simply existing.
Shortly after reading TMF, I found this forum and have lurked on it, occasionally for the last couple of years, but never took any action. I've read the introductions of other newbies and saw how many others...maybe not in as bad shape nor as old as myself have received advice and direction from the collective brain trust here, however, I was too withdrawn and too proud to ask for help...After another recent job setback (insurance sales) I feel maybe it's time to try something else.
I'm willing to listen to ANY ADVICE no matter how tough it may be. I screwed up and take responsibility for my situation. Sorry for the long read.
Thanks in advance. God bless.
I was first introduced to TMF by one of my brothers back in early 2014 (I was 53 at the time). He told me about this amazing book he heard about, although in retrospect, I doubt if he ever read all of it. I did, immediately.
Unfortunately, I'm not much of a reader. My mind drifts easily, when I read. So, unless I'm reading something I really enjoy, it's a major chore. However, I read TMF quickly. As a wantrepeneur, I saw this book as a way to help get over the professional and financial hump and get my own Lambo...actually, I'm more of a Porsche guy, but you get the idea.
When I read TMF, I was a year removed from a fairly successful run in the mortgage industry as an MLO. I got in a year before 9/11. I had NO financial background, but due to the freewheeling nature of the industry then, even a novice like myself was able to make enough money to feel like I was ballin!
9/11 seems to be the time the company I worked at took off. It seems we had a license to print money! As a guy who never made more than $55k or so in a year, I was starting to pull in $100k+ and after being pretty frugal with my money for a few years, I felt confident enough to start rewarding my efforts.
I bought a Boxster, lots of expensive clothes, Rolex, traveled some, and felt that I had arrived. Along with that, I was able to use my good fortune to help others. I gave charitably and helped my family, whenever necessary. In my circle of friends and family, I was probably the most successful financially...and I'm talking no more than $200k.
I worked at a firm where if you WEREN'T making six figures, people looked at you kinda sideways. There wasn't much said, but you could sense it. I got in at my company on the ground floor as one of the first employees, and as such, I saw lots of people come afterwards. Soon, I saw many others easily eclipse my earnings, but at the time, I was so busy having a good time...think Wolf of Wall St kinda fun..I shrugged it off. In my mind, this money machine was never gonna stop. It did.
I like to pat myself on the back and say I saw the 08 Recession a year before it happened and tried to avoid it by going into the management of the company and taking a nice salary, vs working for what I saw were my dwindling commissions.
By that time, I had 2 homes and had racked up tons of debt from living large, and although I knew I needed to make some changes, I never did. At the very least, I needed to downsize, but I kept believing that my financial situation was going to make a turn for the better.
Unfortunately, I didn't network much, didn't foster relationships both inside nor outside my company, so instead of having a safe place to land as this plane was going down in flames, I went down with it. Over the next few years, I lost everything..both homes, pawned my Roley, relationships..my girlfriend moved on, and I just kinda withdrew into a shell...but I somehow still assumed I'd find my way out. I tried saying positive things to myself to get motivated, but nothing seemed to work.
Fast forward to now, I've had more dead ends than I need to mention. I've found every scam job on Craigslist, to the point that I was paralyzed with inaction and fear of trying something that MIGHT NOT work.
Taking assessment of my skills, I like to think I'm a good person..kinda introverted, and truly love people no matter race, creed, orientation, etc..I don't have a degree, I'm somewhat lazy, and have few marketable skills. However, I'm creative as hell...I was a fine arts major in college, but my creativity manifests itself in many ways...often in areas I have no expertise in, just a good idea.
My challenge is to find my way. I'm lost professionally and I'm at an age where I should be helping others and looking towards retirement, but I find myself starting over yet again, and unable to help myself. Although I'm homeless and would be on the streets if not for the kindness of my current girlfriend and family, I live somewhat comfortably (this is part of the problem)...don't miss any meals, still have a car, but I'm not living, simply existing.
Shortly after reading TMF, I found this forum and have lurked on it, occasionally for the last couple of years, but never took any action. I've read the introductions of other newbies and saw how many others...maybe not in as bad shape nor as old as myself have received advice and direction from the collective brain trust here, however, I was too withdrawn and too proud to ask for help...After another recent job setback (insurance sales) I feel maybe it's time to try something else.
I'm willing to listen to ANY ADVICE no matter how tough it may be. I screwed up and take responsibility for my situation. Sorry for the long read.
Thanks in advance. God bless.
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