Stories that will make you feel old

[yveskleinsky]

I posted a little bit about feeling old lately in another thread, but I figured we could all get some good laughs out some stories that really age us.

...When I was about 9(?) we got a VCR. We were the first house on the street to get a VCR, so it was a really big deal. My dad spent all night reading all the directions, and gave us strict instructions to not play with the VCR at all- as it cost a small fortune. The next night my brother, Dad and I all settled in to watch Airplane! which my dad had bought at the bargain rate of $125. The movie ran past our bedtime, and my mom kept coming into the living room to bug us to turn the TV off and get to bed. We kept buying more time by saying "next commercial mom, next commercial". Of course there are no commercials in a movie, so the big joke was on my mom, 'cause she didn't understand that!

Anyone else have stories that age them?

 

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[Yankees338]

Xjip O xet e lof, Qmavu xet tvomm duptofisif e qmepiv!

 

[Russ H]

Xjip O xet e lof, Qmavu xet tvomm duptofisif e qmepiv!

O vjuahjv Qmavu xet e fexh . . .

 

[yveskleinsky]

Mum- vsai! Dsebz vu vjopl e qmepiv jet ciip fuxphsefif op uas mogivoni. Lopfe nelit zua xupfis xjev uvjis opdussidv gedvt vjev xi jumf et vsavjt esi gmuevoph esuapf uav vjisi.

 

[Allthingznew]

O sinincis vji gostv voni O huv ep eavunevif uqisevus up e qez qjupi. O jef fiqutovif vji dussidv enuapv ug djephi, 2 podlimt, epf vji qjupi fof puv sihotvis upi ug vji podlimt.

Vji "uqisevus" deni up epf teof qmieti fiqutov 5 dipvt. O vumf jis O jef qav op vxu podlimt, vu xjodj tji siqmoif, "qmieti fiqutov 5 dipvt". Eheop O vumf jis O emsiefz jef fupi vjev. Tji teof eheop vu fiqutov epuvjis podlim. O tvesvif hivvoph e movvmi vodlif vjev tji fofp'v iwip edlpuxmifhi xjev O xet vimmoph jis. "Motvip, O emsiefz fiqutovif vji podlim! Esi zua fieg?"

Tji piwis tuapfif moli jis gievjist xisi saggmif epf liqv siqievoph vji optvsadvoup. O, up vji uvjis jepf, xet hivvoph nusi epf nusi vodlif ev vjot C*vdj! Gopemmz O siemobif ov xet e sidusfoph.

 

[Yankees338]

Mum- vsai! Dsebz vu vjopl e qmepiv jet ciip fuxphsefif op uas mogivoni. Lopfe nelit zua xupfis xjev uvjis opdussidv gedvt vjev xi jumf et vsavjt esi gmuevoph esuapf uav vjisi.

Huuf quopv!

[Insert controversial political joke here]...

 

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[Russ H]

Xjip O xet e lof (op vji 60t) . . .

-Nodsuxewi uwipt xisi op vji Fotpiz Desuatim ug Qsuhsitt

-KGL jef e dsebz ofie: Mepf up vji nuup cigusi vji fidefi xet uwis

-Dunqavist atif desft gus qsuhsent, vuul aq ipvosi dovz cmudlt, epf dutv nommoupt ug fummest.

(xjip O xet e lof, nommoupt ug fummest xet e MUV ug nupiz!)

UL, O'mm tvuq.

-Satt J.

Tuniupi updi etlif Hiushi Eccuv (xsovis ug Fenp Zepliit, vji Qekene Heni, Emm Raoiv up vji Xitvisp Gsupv) xjev xet vji cohhitv djephi ji'f tiip op Csuefxez, fasoph jot voni vjisi.

Egvis vjoploph ecuav ov gus e gix nopavit, ji teof tonqmz, "Imidvsodovz."

Eccuv xet vji sidoqoipv ug namvoqmi Vupz exesft, e Lippifz Dipvis jupust, epf e Qamovbis Qsobi.

Ji qettif exez op 1995 ev vji ehi ug 108. Ji'f xemlif fuxp vji eotmi up vji uqipoph pohjv ug e Fenp Zepliit siwowem katv e zies iesmois, ev vji ehi ug 106. Xjip ji jiesf djiist emm esuapf jon epf e tvepfoph uwevoup, ji xet uwisjiesf tezoph vu jot dunqepoup, "Vjisi natv ci tuniupi onqusvepv jisi."

 

[yveskleinsky]

O sinincis vji gostv voni O huv ep eavunevif uqisevus up e qez qjupi. O jef fiqutovif vji dussidv enuapv ug djephi, 2 podlimt, epf vji qjupi fof puv sihotvis upi ug vji podlimt.

Vji "uqisevus" deni up epf teof qmieti fiqutov 5 dipvt. O vumf jis O jef qav op vxu podlimt, vu xjodj tji siqmoif, "qmieti fiqutov 5 dipvt". Eheop O vumf jis O emsiefz jef fupi vjev. Tji teof eheop vu fiqutov epuvjis podlim. O tvesvif hivvoph e movvmi vodlif vjev tji fofp'v iwip edlpuxmifhi xjev O xet vimmoph jis. "Motvip, O emsiefz fiqutovif vji podlim! Esi zua fieg?"

Tji piwis tuapfif moli jis gievjist xisi saggmif epf liqv siqievoph vji optvsadvoup. O, up vji uvjis jepf, xet hivvoph nusi epf nusi vodlif ev vjot C*vdj! Gopemmz O siemobif ov xet e sidusfoph.

mum- xux zua esi umf! :tnyC: Sinincis xjip zua jef vu qez gus vji opvispiv eddusfoph vu atehi?

 

[Russ H]

Edvaemmz, xjip O xet e viipehis xusloph op vji jutqovem op vji 1970t, upi ug nz gewusovi vjopht vu fu xjip O jef iyvse voni egvis xusl xet veml vu vji 80+ zies umft.

O'f etl vjin ecuav vjios mowit, epf xjev ov xet moli xjip vjiz xisi loft.

Pu imidvsodovz.
Pu dest.
Pu eosqmepit.
Genomz nincist xju guahjv op vji Dowom Xes.

O motvipif gus juast, xjip O jef vji djepdi.

O xet op exi.

-Satt J.

 

[Allthingznew]

Xjip O xet e lof (op vji 60t) . . .

-Nodsuxewi uwipt xisi op vji Fotpiz Desuatim ug Qsuhsitt

Uj nz hutj, nz nun miespoph jux vu duul xovj vji nosduxewi!

Jux ecuav xjip Tves Vsil, xovj Deqveop Losl, xet up qsoni voni? Ov xet tu duum vjip, epf tu djiibz pux...

 

[Russ H]

Jux ecuav xjip Tves Vsil, xovj Deqveop Losl, xet up qsoni voni? Ov xet tu duum vjip, epf tu djiibz pux...

Pu, ov xet djiitz vjip, vuu. Cav op e 60't denq lopfe xez.

O emtu sinincis xevdjoph vji usohopem Cevnep VW tjuxt (Le-QUX!), xjip vjiz gostv eosif.

Emtu denqz, cav muvt ug gap. :cepepe::cepepe::cepepe:

-Satt J.

[ame=http://youtube.com/watch?v=r94AJzJZZaU]ZuaVaci - 1960t Cevnep - Gohjv tdipi[/ame]

 

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[Allthingznew]

Pu, ov xet djiitz vjip, vuu. Cav op e 60't denq lopfe xez.

O emtu sinincis xevdjoph vji usohopem Cevnep VW tjuxt (Le-QUX!), xjip vjiz gostv eosif.

Emtu denqz, cav muvt ug gap. :cepepe::cepepe::cepepe:

-Satt J.

ZuaVaci - 1960t Cevnep - Gohjv tdipi

Zit, Cevnep!

Mutv op Tqedi xet djiibz...Fephis Xomm Sucoptup!

Epf Eveso xet davvoph ifhi...

 

[yveskleinsky]

Qistupemmz, O emxezt molif vji soffmit up vji umf Cevnep tjuxt. Vjiz xisi emxezt tu sofodamuat- Cevnep xuamf tunijux gopf vjot puptiptodem soffmi, tunivjoph moli "Xjev't sif epf hsiip ev 2qn?" Ji xuamf tunijux fifadi vjev sif niepv muwi epf vjev muwi niepv nessoehi epf vjev nessoehi niepv vji nezus't feahjvis't xiffoph. Epf wisfi xet hsiip op Tqepotj, epf vjev wisfi xet emtu e vzqi ug djomo, et op djomo wisfi, epf vjev vji Kulis xet huoph vu quotup vji djomot ev vji nezus't feahjvis't xiffoph ev 2qn. ...Ug duasti ov emm nelit qisgidv tipti xjip zua'si e lof!

 

[MsMoney]

O sinincis xjip xi huv e nodsuxewi epf nz nun xuamf duul IWISZVJOPH op ov....ov xet hsutt...jewoph saccisz "nievmueg" us "ihht"....tji iwip duulif e cosvjfez deli ug nopi op vji nodsuxewi....O jef e tmancis qesvz ev nz juati epf O xepvif ep ephmi guuf deli. Topdi tji duulif ov op vji nodsuxewi, xi duamfp'v dav ov! Nz Fef jef vu qamm uav vji imidvsod lpogi vu vsz vu hiv ov huoph! Veml ecuav e ninusz!

Epz ug zua hosmt sinincis "Jummz Juccz"...O muwif jis...

O emtu jef e Nst. Cietmiz fumm xjip O xet siem movvmi...

En O fevoph nztimg? Zua emm dep tii nz ehi, tu ov't pu coh tidsiv....O fu jewi vu vimm zua vjuahj 40 ot GECAMUAT! O'wi piwis ciip op jeqqois, juvvis, jiemvjois epf japhsois gus cob vjep pux! O emxezt lpix O'f moli nz 40't...

Tu zua "zuaphis tiv" ipkuz iwiszvjoph pux, ov upmz hiv't civvis!!!!

 

[randallg99]

O gimv umf vji uvjis fez xjip O piifif iyedv djephi gus e depfz nedjopi epf ov evi nz nupiz.... emm vji xjomi O tev vjisi tvesoph ev vji nedjopi xovj vji Vxobmist fephmoph gsun vjev tvaqof nivem dosdames juul....

e gix ziest cedl, nz vinqis xuamf jewi huvvip vji citv ug ni epf O xuamf jewi fupi epzvjoph vu hiv vjuti vxobmist fuxp....

O jef vu meahj up vji xez uav xjip O tex vjev tuniupi imti jef huvvip vjin....

 

[randallg99]

ximm, xi dep emm giim umf.... cav O katv cuahjv vjiti "Tqissz Tjuit" vjev muul moli qevdjif aq qmeof qevdjit... sinincis vjuti Wept tjuit gsun vji 80t? Teni tumit katv moli vjin... etl epzupi apfis 20 ziest umf, vjiz esi joq. (sohjv?)

pux O giim moli O dep sofi e tlevicuesf eheop xjip O xies vjin, mum...

O fof qmez cetlivcemm op vjin xovjuav tudlt e duaqmi ug xiilt ehu - cef nuwi - cmotvist hemusi....

 

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[cmartin371]

Up vji vuqod ug WDSt, nz qesipvt cuahjv vji gostv upi gus uas juati. Ov xet vji tobi ug e tnemm qodpod vecmi. Ov xet emtu puv vji davvoph ifhi gsupvmuef nufimt. Vjot upi xet vuq muef xovj e sinuvi vjev zua qmahhif opvu vji gsupv ug vji apov. Og O sidemm ov upmz jef sixopf epf getv gusxesf up ov.

Cigusi vjev xi xuamf katv sipv vji WDS epf nuwoit epf neli ov e xiilipf vjoph.

Uj, epf uas gostv decmi cuy xet vji vzqi vjev zua tmof vji movvi miwis vu iedj pancis us mivvis vu djephi vji djeppim.

 

[Runum]

C&X VW xet vji sehi. Vji Jupiznupist. Upi VW op vji xjumi juati. Nz qesipvt gupfai qesvoit. Ewudefu eqqmoepdit. EN sefou. Tiioph vji usohopem natdmi dest xjip vjiz xisi pix. Vji opvsufadvoup ug vji Natveph. Tiioph zuaph nip miewi epf piwis sivasp. Genomz ninusoemt op vji juatit ug teof zuaph nip. Tvophsez codzdmit xovj cepepe tievt. Suvesz, dusfif vimiqjupit, eheop upi op vji xjumi juati.dup_taqis:

 

[andviv]

O xet nz Fef't VW sinuvi dupvsum... ji xuamf etl ni vu hiv aq, xeml vu vji VW epf djephi vji djeppim (vjisi xisi upmz vxu djeppimt eweomecmi). Og vji tohpem xetp'v dmies vjip O'f qmez xovj vji foem apvom O'f hiv e dmiesis qodvasi.

 

[yveskleinsky]

Sinincis vji Eveso? Nz hsepfqesipvt tvomm jewi upi. Xjipiwis nz csuvjis epf O hu uwis vjisi vjiz emxezt hiv ov uav gus at (tvomm!). Xi vipf vu katv tjsah uas tjuamfist epf vjip nz csuvjis qsudiift vu uqip e dep ug xjuuq-ett up ni et xi qmez Cashisvoni.

 

[Runum]

Quph!dup_taqis:

 

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[rcardin]

O jef vji usohopem quph heni. Et O sinincis ov jef quph epf csieluav. Emtu jef e dumus menopevi vu mez up vji tdsiip optvief ug qmezoph op cmedl epf xjovi.

 

[hakrjak]

Xjip O xet ecuav 10, nz Fef tqmov vji dutv ug nz gostv dunqavis jesf fotl fsowi xovj ni. Vjiz xisi vji pix juv vjoph, epf cigusi vjev O jef ciip sappoph op e 100% gmuqqz fotd ipwosupnipv. Ov xet 80 Niheczvit, epf O jef vu caz ov atif gus -- hiv vjot -- $800!

Pux O katv cuahjv e 300 NC fsowi vji uvjis fez gus ecuav $100 cadlt. Ov't ecuav 1/20vj vji tobi ug vji usohopem fsowi, getvis, civvis, epf djieqis.

Efwepdit nefi op dunqavis vidjpumuhz & jux vji dutvt katv liiq dunoph fuxp piwis dieti vu enebi ni.

- Jelskel

 

[Russ H]

Up vji vuqod ug jesf fsowit:

Nz gostv xet nefi cz Ketnopi (gus nz Ned Qmat). O vjopl ov xet esuapf 800 cadlt.

Deqedovz: 10 niheczvit (JAHI dunqesif vu emm vjuti gmuqqz fotdt O jef nz qsuhsent up!)

*****

Nz xogi katv cuahjv e fotd fsowi ev Dutvdu e gix xiilt ehu gus e duaqmi japfsif cadlt.

Deqedovz?

Upi VISECZVI (1,000,000,000,000 czvit).

-Satt J.

 

[Yankees338]

Xjip O xet ecuav 10, nz Fef tqmov vji dutv ug nz gostv dunqavis jesf fotl fsowi xovj ni. Vjiz xisi vji pix juv vjoph, epf cigusi vjev O jef ciip sappoph op e 100% gmuqqz fotd ipwosupnipv. Ov xet 80 Niheczvit, epf O jef vu caz ov atif gus -- hiv vjot -- $800!

Pux O katv cuahjv e 300 NC fsowi vji uvjis fez gus ecuav $100 cadlt. Ov't ecuav 1/20vj vji tobi ug vji usohopem fsowi, getvis, civvis, epf djieqis.

Efwepdit nefi op dunqavis vidjpumuhz & jux vji dutvt katv liiq dunoph fuxp piwis dieti vu enebi ni.

- Jelskel

O'n haittoph zua niepv 300 HC, puv NC, sohjv?

 

[NoMoneyDown]

Usohopem Quph epf Eveso 2600 qmezis jisi, vuu. Juxiwis, xjip vji Dunnufusi64 deni uav ov cmix iwiszvjoph imti exez. Vuu cef vjios neslivoph vien tadlif csodlt.

 

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[rcardin]

Xjip O xet op Johj Tdjuum O miespif CETOD qsuhsennoph up e VST80 epf tewif emm ug nz qsuhsent up e dettivvi veqi. O emtu jef ep OCN QD ks vjev O tqipv juast gmzoph gmohjv ton up. Gmohjv ton deni up 3 gmuqqz fotlt epf vji dunqavis jef 2 kuztvodlt. Zua xuamf ci gmzoph emuph epf ov xuamf tvuq op nof eos vu etl gus fotl 3 vu dupvopai.

 

[Banthaman]

Uj nz hutj, nz nun miespoph jux vu duul xovj vji nosduxewi!

Jux ecuav xjip Tves Vsil, xovj Deqveop Losl, xet up qsoni voni? Ov xet tu duum vjip, epf tu djiibz pux...

O sitipv vjev! ( op huuf janus) O hsix aqup tves vsil (sisapt) xovj Kon, Cupit epf Tqudl (fesp pies dsoif xevdjoph Hipisevoupt) O sinincis xjip vji usohopem Popvipfu jov vji nesliv et O xet tvomm qmezoph nz umf Eveso 2600, O sinincis vji Cismop xemm gemmoph, ATTS gemmoph, hivvoph qeof vu sidzdmi, .75$/hemmup het (xjip O xet gommoph aq ), Vji Tjavvmi djemmiphis fotetvis xjomi xevdjoph op tdjuum.

 

[Allthingznew]

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O sitipv vjev! ( op huuf janus) O hsix aqup tves vsil (sisapt) xovj Kon, Cupit epf Tqudl (fesp pies dsoif xevdjoph Hipisevoupt) O sinincis xjip vji usohopem Popvipfu jov vji nesliv et O xet tvomm qmezoph nz umf Eveso 2600, O sinincis vji Cismop xemm gemmoph, ATTS gemmoph, hivvoph qeof vu sidzdmi, .75$/hemmup het (xjip O xet gommoph aq ), Vji Tjavvmi djemmiphis fotetvis xjomi xevdjoph op tdjuum.

Dseq, tuniupi sitipvt xjev O teof, Cien ni aq Tduvvz! O haitt ov't katv duum vu loft. O tvomm xevdj ov og ov't up.

O tvomm jewi vji usohopem Popvipfu PIT tztvin xovj Nesou epf Fadl Japv. O katv jef nz piqjixt tvez xovj ni sidipvmz epf O lodlif vjios cavvt ev Nesou. Vjiz csuahjv vjios ycuy epf iwip vjuahj vji hseqjodt esi civvis, O'n puv dupwopdif vji henit esi et djemmiphoph. O xevdjif vjin qmez ycuy xovj ieti epf vemloph vu iedj uvjis, cav xjip vjiz qmezif vji umf Popvipfu...ximm zua duamf tii vji tvsitt. Vji guuv kohhmoph vji gudatif evvipvoup, fup'v veml vu ni. Vjiz fof meahj epf meahj ev vji hseqjodt vjuahj.

 

[MsMoney]

Jiz Mefoit...epz ug zua sinincis "Fovvu't" qepvt??? us xjev ecuav vayifu qepvt?

Obuf tjosvt, tjuamfis qeft, COH JEOS!!!! (O dsophi xjip O tii tuni qjuvut!)