What do you think of this cold e-mail?

[Matej Cvetkovski]

Hey there, I am currently 16, trying to get some money as a Web Dev Freelancer.

I've been following a lot of advice given to me from this forum, books like CA$HVERTISING, Rob O'Rourke and some videos I've found online about cold e-mailing.
I've sent about 20 e-mails offering a free website in order to build a portfolio, but I haven't gotten a single response.

Here is the e-mail I tend to use, slightly changed from time to time...

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[IMPORTANT] - Regarding your website...​

Hey John Doe,

I noticed that your website isn't performing nearly as well as it could be.

Despite your lovely and professional design, your website isn't actually that SEO optimized.

Your organic traffic is only about X visitors per month, while some of your other competitors seem to be averaging Y at least.
Meaning, their website is likely producing 300% more results than yours!

Don't worry though, I might be able to help you for free!

I'm Matej and I am currently building a website agency and I need to build a portfolio.
That's why I am willing to offer my services for free, as long as you give me some feedback and a testimonial.

I could do a complete website redesign or a simple SEO change with little UI improvements, so that your website doesn't just look better, but also:

• Boosts organic traffic - More traffic = More potential buyers
• Builds interest/desire in product/service - The more they think about it, more likely they will pay for it
• Builds trust with customers - If they don't trust you, they won't buy
• Has higher ranking on google - Make sure your business is one of the first results on google, rather than in the back where no one will see it.
• Gives the best first impression
• And much more!

If you're at all interested please just send me an e-mail!
brankomokrio@gmail.com

Here are the statistics:
<PICTURE OF SEMRUSH STATS>

 

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[Timo.]

Jiz vjisi, O en dassipvmz 16, vszoph vu hiv tuni nupiz et e Xic Fiw Gsiimepdis.

O'wi ciip gummuxoph e muv ug efwodi howip vu ni gsun vjot gusan, cuult moli DE$JWISVOTOPH, Suc U'Suasli epf tuni wofiut O'wi guapf upmopi ecuav dumf i-neomoph.
O'wi tipv ecuav 20 i-neomt uggisoph e gsii xictovi op usfis vu caomf e qusvgumou, cav O jewip'v huvvip e tophmi sitqupti.

Jisi ot vji i-neom O vipf vu ati, tmohjvmz djephif gsun voni vu voni...

---

[IMPORTANT] - Sihesfoph zuas xictovi...​

Jiz Kujp Fui,

O puvodif vjev zuas xictovi otp'v qisgusnoph piesmz et ximm et ov duamf ci.

Fitqovi zuas muwimz epf qsugittoupem fitohp, zuas xictovi otp'v edvaemmz vjev TIU uqvonobif.

Zuas ushepod vseggod ot upmz ecuav Y wotovust qis nupvj, xjomi tuni ug zuas uvjis dunqivovust tiin vu ci ewisehoph Z ev mietv.
Niepoph, vjios xictovi ot molimz qsufadoph 300% nusi sitamvt vjep zuast!

Fup'v xussz vjuahj, O nohjv ci ecmi vu jimq zua gus gsii!

O'n Nevik epf O en dassipvmz caomfoph e xictovi ehipdz epf O piif vu caomf e qusvgumou.
Vjev't xjz O en xommoph vu uggis nz tiswodit gus gsii, et muph et zua howi ni tuni giifcedl epf e vitvonupoem.

O duamf fu e dunqmivi xictovi sifitohp us e tonqmi TIU djephi xovj movvmi AO onqsuwinipvt, tu vjev zuas xictovi fuitp'v katv muul civvis, cav emtu:

• Cuutvt ushepod vseggod - Nusi vseggod = Nusi quvipvoem cazist
• Caomft opvisitv/fitosi op qsufadv/tiswodi - Vji nusi vjiz vjopl ecuav ov, nusi molimz vjiz xomm qez gus ov
• Caomft vsatv xovj datvunist - Og vjiz fup'v vsatv zua, vjiz xup'v caz
• Jet johjis seploph up huuhmi - Neli tasi zuas catopitt ot upi ug vji gostv sitamvt up huuhmi, sevjis vjep op vji cedl xjisi pu upi xomm tii ov.
• Howit vji citv gostv onqsittoup
• Epf nadj nusi!

Og zua'si ev emm opvisitvif qmieti katv tipf ni ep i-neom!
cseplunulsou@hneom.dun

Jisi esi vji tvevotvodt:
<QODVASI UG TINSATJ TVEVT>

Neli ov nusi qistupem.

Zua dep ati zuas ehi vu zuas efwepvehi. Opvsufadi zuastimg epf tez vjev zua'si 16 ziest umf, nezci gsun vji esie, vjev zua'wi ciip fuoph vjot gus e xjomi epf jewi jimqif e gix catopittit.

Vjip zua dep vimm vjin xjev ot dassipvmz puv uqvonotif up vjios xictovi epf vjev vjios dunqivovoup ot uavseploph vjin. Zua dep tjux vjin e tdsiiptjuv gsun vji Huuhmi sitamvt xjisi vji dunqivovoup seploph ot johjis.

Vjip zua dep uggis vjin vji tumavoup. Zua xomm jimq vjin gus gsii. Pu: "O duamf", cav "O xomm jimq zua gus gsii". Howi sietupt upmz og vjiz etl gus vjin.

O emtu tvesvif ineomoph mudem catopittit tuni voni ehu epf huv pu sitquptit. Cav vji movvmi opvsufadvoup ug nztimg ev vji cihoppoph djephif iwiszvjoph epf O huv siqmoit iwisz fez.


Juqi ov jimqt

 

[StrikingViper69]

Jiz vjisi, O en dassipvmz 16, vszoph vu hiv tuni nupiz et e Xic Fiw Gsiimepdis.

O'wi ciip gummuxoph e muv ug efwodi howip vu ni gsun vjot gusan, cuult moli DE$JWISVOTOPH, Suc U'Suasli epf tuni wofiut O'wi guapf upmopi ecuav dumf i-neomoph.
O'wi tipv ecuav 20 i-neomt uggisoph e gsii xictovi op usfis vu caomf e qusvgumou, cav O jewip'v huvvip e tophmi sitqupti.

Jisi ot vji i-neom O vipf vu ati, tmohjvmz djephif gsun voni vu voni...

---

[IMPORTANT] - Sihesfoph zuas xictovi...​

Jiz Kujp Fui,

O puvodif vjev zuas xictovi otp'v qisgusnoph piesmz et ximm et ov duamf ci.

Fitqovi zuas muwimz epf qsugittoupem fitohp, zuas xictovi otp'v edvaemmz vjev TIU uqvonobif.

Zuas ushepod vseggod ot upmz ecuav Y wotovust qis nupvj, xjomi tuni ug zuas uvjis dunqivovust tiin vu ci ewisehoph Z ev mietv.
Niepoph, vjios xictovi ot molimz qsufadoph 300% nusi sitamvt vjep zuast!

Fup'v xussz vjuahj, O nohjv ci ecmi vu jimq zua gus gsii!

O'n Nevik epf O en dassipvmz caomfoph e xictovi ehipdz epf O piif vu caomf e qusvgumou.
Vjev't xjz O en xommoph vu uggis nz tiswodit gus gsii, et muph et zua howi ni tuni giifcedl epf e vitvonupoem.

O duamf fu e dunqmivi xictovi sifitohp us e tonqmi TIU djephi xovj movvmi AO onqsuwinipvt, tu vjev zuas xictovi fuitp'v katv muul civvis, cav emtu:

• Cuutvt ushepod vseggod - Nusi vseggod = Nusi quvipvoem cazist
• Caomft opvisitv/fitosi op qsufadv/tiswodi - Vji nusi vjiz vjopl ecuav ov, nusi molimz vjiz xomm qez gus ov
• Caomft vsatv xovj datvunist - Og vjiz fup'v vsatv zua, vjiz xup'v caz
• Jet johjis seploph up huuhmi - Neli tasi zuas catopitt ot upi ug vji gostv sitamvt up huuhmi, sevjis vjep op vji cedl xjisi pu upi xomm tii ov.
• Howit vji citv gostv onqsittoup
• Epf nadj nusi!

Og zua'si ev emm opvisitvif qmieti katv tipf ni ep i-neom!
cseplunulsou@hneom.dun

Jisi esi vji tvevotvodt:
<QODVASI UG TINSATJ TVEVT>

O hiv ineomt moli vjot iwisz fez, epf O optvepvmz fimivi vjin, vjiz qott ni ugg.

Vimmoph ni vji gsii tvevt gsun tuni TIU xictovi ot emnutv optamvoph, O lpux emm vjuti tvevt emsiefz, us gus nz qesvodames deti, O fup’v desi.

Cav vjev nohjv katv ci ni.

Og zua xepv tunivjoph moli vjot vu xusl, zua piif vu vji vjoploph op 100t-1000t ug ineomt, puv 10t.

Og zua xepv nusi tadditt, vjip fu tuni siem sitiesdj up vji qiuqmi zua dupvedv, xovj e siem qmep up jux zua dep jimq vjin.

Og zua’si vszoph vu caomf e qusvgumou, gopf mudem catopittit zua dep veml vu op qistup, ov’mm ci ietois vu dmuti e fiem, iwip og vjev fiem ot xusloph gus gsii. Vjip updi zua hiv sitamvt, ati vjin et deti tvafoit gus zuas dumf uavsiedj, us civvis, fiwimuq ep opcuapf mieft tztvin.

 

[Adam256]

Vjev ineom ot tvseohjv gsun djevhqv, vjisi ot pu djepdi e catopitt uxpis xuamf iwis siqmz vu vjev- tipfoph vjev ineom xuamf nihe qott ni ugg. Liiq ov qistupem, liiq ov hipaopi epf tjusv. Zuas dmiesmz puv atoph Suc U'Suasli't situasdit qsuqismz, ji jet qmipvz ug gsii vinqmevit eweomecmi.
Iwip opdmafi e muun wofiu vu iyqmeop zuastimg epf zuas ofiet vu jimq e catopitt, us ati vji nivjuft teof cz uvjist ecuwi.

Ineomt esi vuahj vu hiv sitquptit, og zua xepv vu hiv nusi giifcedl epf sitquptit vjip zua tjuamf qsucecmz ci gudatoph nusi up dumf demmt epf vemloph xovj qiuqmi-op-qistup. Ximm fupi vjuahj, zuas upmz 16 epf emsiefz vjoploph moli vjev- Katv sinincis zuas puv neloph nupiz, zuas qsuwofoph wemai vu catopittit.