Here's what I had to learn the hard way. This is probably more of a warning to women....you decide...
By the time I was 23 years old I had 2 kids, been married (and now going thru a divorce!). The marriage was full of abuse, addictions and immaturity!
After several years, I met a man whom I thought was "the one"....we ended up living together and over time, started businesses and purchased assets of all types (stocks, oil wells, real estate, you name it...). We were both in our 30's and making anywhere from $40,000 to $80,000 a month...putting most of it back into our businesses. Our motto was, "if it doesn't make us money, it costs us money!". We made sure our money was making us more money...we were golden!
What went wrong for me in this situation is, we never got married and the majority of the assets we put in HIS name! Now, I know you are probably thinking...ARE YOU STUPID!? Yes, yes I was! I was because I didn't realize my own true value. I trusted this person and felt he loved me as I loved him. Looking back I have no one to blame but myself. I am a very smart woman, with a keen instinct....in my relationship with this man I didn't know it...he would belittle me and put me down. Any problems were my fault and any successes were only because of him. I ate all the b.s. he handed out because I thought it was true. His line to me was "I am a man of my word".
When he moved out, 8 years later, we sat down together one day and wrote out a "contract" between the two of us in regard's to all of our assets. I kept my end of the bargin, but didn't realize that he had no intention of keeping his end. After a year & a half of us paying ALOT of money to lawyers....I believe that we both lost.
Now, almost 4 years later I am working my way back up the chain to success. I look back on my years with this man and realize that the best gift he ever gave me was the day he moved out. I have no animosity towards him, I wish him nothing but peace, love & success. I believe if it wasn't for him, I would'nt really know just how smart I am. It took me attending a Robert Kiyosaki seminar (Rich Dad/Poor Dad author) in Australia (less than a month before he moved out) to realize that I can do it! Robert posed a question to the 100 or so attendees (can't remember the question now if you paid me!), the room went nuts... and for the first and only time in my life the room went quiet. In the midst of that chaos, I KNEW THE ANSWER! I KNEW IT!
Quite a few people got in this long line to meet with Robert & his attorney to give him the "answer" he was looking for. My ex was several people ahead of me in that line...he saw me and frowned...asked what was I doing...HE knew the answer, not me & I was just wasting my time. For the first time in 8 years I stood up for myself and said "maybe so, but I have to give this a shot". Well, my ex DID NOT have the answer, neither did the other people. When it was my turn to talk to Robert, I sat down in front of him & his advisor and gave them my answer. Robert looked at me for a long time and asked seriously "are you sure?"....I paused just briefly, then said "yes, I'm sure". Robert stood up, grabbed my arm & raised it and yelled "we have a winner!".
The look on my ex's face was priceless. He went completely pale and his jaw dropped. This was a 3 day seminar...the rest of my time there, I was VERY popular and had many people asking me how I knew the answer....I believe that that moment was meant just for me...it was meant for me to realize just how smart I am. It was meant for me to always go back to that moment in times of doubt and insecurity. That moment was a starting point for me in every area of my life....It laid the ground work for me in my spiritual journey.
Up until that point I never truly realized just how special I was. I know that this is meant to be a "warning" to others what not to do...but, I also believe that there is always goodness out of our trials. And there was mine!
The "warning" I would like to leave you all with is, NEVER UNDERESTIMATE YOURSELF. Make sure you take care of yourself and your needs. You do not need to be selfish, greedy or mean about it...but out of self respect, you need to make sure that you are valued too!
I look forward to reading & learning about all of you, please feel free to contact me and ask me any questions you'd like...or give me your feedback...I welcome learning!
By the time I was 23 years old I had 2 kids, been married (and now going thru a divorce!). The marriage was full of abuse, addictions and immaturity!
After several years, I met a man whom I thought was "the one"....we ended up living together and over time, started businesses and purchased assets of all types (stocks, oil wells, real estate, you name it...). We were both in our 30's and making anywhere from $40,000 to $80,000 a month...putting most of it back into our businesses. Our motto was, "if it doesn't make us money, it costs us money!". We made sure our money was making us more money...we were golden!
What went wrong for me in this situation is, we never got married and the majority of the assets we put in HIS name! Now, I know you are probably thinking...ARE YOU STUPID!? Yes, yes I was! I was because I didn't realize my own true value. I trusted this person and felt he loved me as I loved him. Looking back I have no one to blame but myself. I am a very smart woman, with a keen instinct....in my relationship with this man I didn't know it...he would belittle me and put me down. Any problems were my fault and any successes were only because of him. I ate all the b.s. he handed out because I thought it was true. His line to me was "I am a man of my word".
When he moved out, 8 years later, we sat down together one day and wrote out a "contract" between the two of us in regard's to all of our assets. I kept my end of the bargin, but didn't realize that he had no intention of keeping his end. After a year & a half of us paying ALOT of money to lawyers....I believe that we both lost.
Now, almost 4 years later I am working my way back up the chain to success. I look back on my years with this man and realize that the best gift he ever gave me was the day he moved out. I have no animosity towards him, I wish him nothing but peace, love & success. I believe if it wasn't for him, I would'nt really know just how smart I am. It took me attending a Robert Kiyosaki seminar (Rich Dad/Poor Dad author) in Australia (less than a month before he moved out) to realize that I can do it! Robert posed a question to the 100 or so attendees (can't remember the question now if you paid me!), the room went nuts... and for the first and only time in my life the room went quiet. In the midst of that chaos, I KNEW THE ANSWER! I KNEW IT!
Quite a few people got in this long line to meet with Robert & his attorney to give him the "answer" he was looking for. My ex was several people ahead of me in that line...he saw me and frowned...asked what was I doing...HE knew the answer, not me & I was just wasting my time. For the first time in 8 years I stood up for myself and said "maybe so, but I have to give this a shot". Well, my ex DID NOT have the answer, neither did the other people. When it was my turn to talk to Robert, I sat down in front of him & his advisor and gave them my answer. Robert looked at me for a long time and asked seriously "are you sure?"....I paused just briefly, then said "yes, I'm sure". Robert stood up, grabbed my arm & raised it and yelled "we have a winner!".
The look on my ex's face was priceless. He went completely pale and his jaw dropped. This was a 3 day seminar...the rest of my time there, I was VERY popular and had many people asking me how I knew the answer....I believe that that moment was meant just for me...it was meant for me to realize just how smart I am. It was meant for me to always go back to that moment in times of doubt and insecurity. That moment was a starting point for me in every area of my life....It laid the ground work for me in my spiritual journey.
Up until that point I never truly realized just how special I was. I know that this is meant to be a "warning" to others what not to do...but, I also believe that there is always goodness out of our trials. And there was mine!
The "warning" I would like to leave you all with is, NEVER UNDERESTIMATE YOURSELF. Make sure you take care of yourself and your needs. You do not need to be selfish, greedy or mean about it...but out of self respect, you need to make sure that you are valued too!
I look forward to reading & learning about all of you, please feel free to contact me and ask me any questions you'd like...or give me your feedback...I welcome learning!
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