Sell your "distressed assets"

[Analyzer]

With our economy in crisis, the US Government is scrambling to rescue our banks by purchasing their "distressed assets", i.e., assets that no one else wants to buy from them. We figured that instead of protesting this plan, we'd give regular Americans the same opportunity to sell their bad assets to the government. We need your help and you need the Government's help!


Use the form below to submit bad assets you'd like the government to take off your hands. And remember, when estimating the value of your 1997 limited edition Hanson single CD "MMMbop", it's not what you can sell these items for that matters, it's what you think they are worth. The fact that you think they are worth more than anyone will buy them for is what makes them bad assets.

BuyMyShitPile.com: Hey Washington, can you buy my bad investments too?

 

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[NoMoneyDown]

MUM! E $2N zesf hpuni.

 

[andviv]

Hipouat!!!
jux duni O fofp'v duni aq xovj vjev ofie???