I have been misdiagnosed. I was a drug addict. A criminal. Easily roused into bad behavior. And thought I was a good dude.
It was around 2012 and I had been smoking weed on and off. Was a young kid. So my friends were doing it, why not?
...But things got airy whenever this thing called spice hit the market.
Half a decade later. I was known as a success story at my doctors office. Somebody that miraculously recovered. And everyone was so proud. I was a model of good health. And a beacon of recovery.
Years later I suspect it was a drug induced psychosis.
...In 2015 I was diagnosed with schizophrenia
And I had a long battle with my mental health. But things got better. I owe a great deal to my grandmother. She had taken me in. And became a symbol of hope.
My grandma was there for me. She took me in. I was this rebellious teenager.
As we fought. My mom moved in with us. And my mom was pivotal in my success. As I protected her she was protecting me. I was away from all the previous life. The life of drugs. I sacrificed everything even my happiness for the life that I would hold. With my recent fathers passing. Things were changing. As they always will.
Last month I talked to my therapist
He told me it was a drug induced psychosis. Exactly what I was suspecting
...all this time
It's been five years, and I didn't get a second opinion. What was I thinking?
I've read that schizophrenia was thrown around whenever you hear that someone is hearing voices. It had been very common. Must have been something to do with this spice stuff
I don't think I went through the phases of schizophrenia. I had just gotten off of drugs and that was my bottleneck. I had been soo lucky. I think I hit odds that you wouldn't believe. All the stars aligning
I'm going to have to continue to do research on this drug induced psychosis. And come to my doctor with what I have found.
I don't know what to do or where I'll go from here.
But I have got to keep my faith.
-I will be successful
-I will live a life of purpose
-I will pay back all those who helped me
I'm 26 and have been on this medication for years. I'm fat and have man boobs. I've lost a good portion of my life.
...In all of this I have grown up. I have joined martial arts and read frequently. It feels like such chaos right now. But I'm going through an instrumental process of my being.
I'm going to be a leader, a speaker, and a coach. Inspiring good. Making change.
Looking back my friends and I weren't bad kids. We were just misguided. And fell off the path.
I talked to a doctor on teledoc. And he told me to lower the medication and come off of it. He said he couldn't tell me a second opinion with it being six years later. But I know what to do.
I want a normal life. One filled with happiness and joy.
I'm going to come to my doctor with my research and tell him what really happened(I'm not out of the woods yet.)
I'm hoping to continue my education. Learn some fasting.
-I have been reading this book about a guy who fasted for 40 days and got rid of his cancer. Wow!
If I make it through this. And get better. I will never have anything to do with this k2 ever again unless I'm on a stage speaking about it to the youth.
I'm lucky to be in the place I'm in. And forever grateful to those that helped me along the way.
My advice. Grow so you eventually can rise.
Put the evil behind you or don't get easily swayed.
And aspire to lead a meaningful life.
We all need you.
It all matters.
It was around 2012 and I had been smoking weed on and off. Was a young kid. So my friends were doing it, why not?
...But things got airy whenever this thing called spice hit the market.
Half a decade later. I was known as a success story at my doctors office. Somebody that miraculously recovered. And everyone was so proud. I was a model of good health. And a beacon of recovery.
Years later I suspect it was a drug induced psychosis.
...In 2015 I was diagnosed with schizophrenia
And I had a long battle with my mental health. But things got better. I owe a great deal to my grandmother. She had taken me in. And became a symbol of hope.
My grandma was there for me. She took me in. I was this rebellious teenager.
As we fought. My mom moved in with us. And my mom was pivotal in my success. As I protected her she was protecting me. I was away from all the previous life. The life of drugs. I sacrificed everything even my happiness for the life that I would hold. With my recent fathers passing. Things were changing. As they always will.
Last month I talked to my therapist
He told me it was a drug induced psychosis. Exactly what I was suspecting
...all this time
It's been five years, and I didn't get a second opinion. What was I thinking?
I've read that schizophrenia was thrown around whenever you hear that someone is hearing voices. It had been very common. Must have been something to do with this spice stuff
I don't think I went through the phases of schizophrenia. I had just gotten off of drugs and that was my bottleneck. I had been soo lucky. I think I hit odds that you wouldn't believe. All the stars aligning
I'm going to have to continue to do research on this drug induced psychosis. And come to my doctor with what I have found.
I don't know what to do or where I'll go from here.
But I have got to keep my faith.
-I will be successful
-I will live a life of purpose
-I will pay back all those who helped me
I'm 26 and have been on this medication for years. I'm fat and have man boobs. I've lost a good portion of my life.
...In all of this I have grown up. I have joined martial arts and read frequently. It feels like such chaos right now. But I'm going through an instrumental process of my being.
I'm going to be a leader, a speaker, and a coach. Inspiring good. Making change.
Looking back my friends and I weren't bad kids. We were just misguided. And fell off the path.
I talked to a doctor on teledoc. And he told me to lower the medication and come off of it. He said he couldn't tell me a second opinion with it being six years later. But I know what to do.
I want a normal life. One filled with happiness and joy.
I'm going to come to my doctor with my research and tell him what really happened(I'm not out of the woods yet.)
I'm hoping to continue my education. Learn some fasting.
-I have been reading this book about a guy who fasted for 40 days and got rid of his cancer. Wow!
If I make it through this. And get better. I will never have anything to do with this k2 ever again unless I'm on a stage speaking about it to the youth.
I'm lucky to be in the place I'm in. And forever grateful to those that helped me along the way.
My advice. Grow so you eventually can rise.
Put the evil behind you or don't get easily swayed.
And aspire to lead a meaningful life.
We all need you.
It all matters.
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