Leaving Negative Friends

[ice]

Hi, Fastlaners,

My best friend called The Millionaire Fastlane a "scam".... of course, he didn't read the book. (And entrepreneurship is far from a scam obviously.)

I've been friends with him for 4 years and I spend about 3 hours a week talking to him at least. He is full of negative ideas like he's a victim, he's unlucky, etc.

Of course, he doesn't do anything to change that.

I just decided that I was tired of his negative dump week after week. I've listened to him for four years and he has been saying the same thing all that time. Naturally, he is free to choose his life path........ but I just don't want to listen to that negativity anymore.

So I cut all contact with him. It's harsh because someone with his negative mindset needs all the support they can get, but he doesn't want to change anything..... and I don't want to listen to that victim mentality.

I feel guilty for dumping his friendship, but I don't want to throw a pity party anymore.

Have any of you done the same? What are your thoughts on the situation?

 

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[domular]

Props on that but I'm sure it's not easy. I finally figured out why rich people hang out with rich people. When you start to get some success and you want to share that success with others, not to brag but because you're proud of what you've done. When you hang out with sidewalkers and do this even if they don't say so you know they resent it and they will instantly respond with something like "that's just a waste of money, no one needs that".

Other successful people aren't threatened by you doing well and if anything it motivates them to accomplish what you've accomplished.

 

[oldscool]

Sorry to hear about your friend...he is intitled to his opinion. Fastlane book is far from a scam. He read/heard the title, and, probably lumped it with the, "make $1,000,000 by sending $1 to these 5 names"(hence: pyramid/chain letter schemes).

It appears you're tired of the relationship. That happens in all kinds of relationships, people grow apart.

You have to do what's right for you.

I wish you both well.

 

[John C.]

One of the most important parts of making lasting changes is to change the unhealthy environment which is not contributing to your success. When it comes to dieting, change the food/snacks you keep in the house. When it comes to quitting smoking/drinking, find new places to hang out and new friends to hang out with. When it comes to changing your life, it is imperative that you change those closest to you - they need to change their outlook/attitude or you need to replace them. It is too easy to get sucked into the same attitude as a complainer/victim and allow that to negatively impact your life.

I congratulate you on the vision to see the need to change and the courage to take action. You must look after yourself first. Your friend will continue to be the way he is unless and until he makes up his mind that he needs to adopt a different outlook on life.

The Fastlane book is certainly not a scam. It contains some of the best advice I have come across. Study it and apply the concepts, you will be much better off than your ex-friend. You will have taken responsibility for your life.

 

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[speedyexe]

i did the same and i feel better , and stop helping them if they didnt ask for it, and if they ask think twice
its your life and you're not immortal so start a brand today! :>
best regards and i hope u make some more positive friends and they will be happy for you if you get lucky in fastlane road

 

[DeletedUser2]

hard to do

but good for you

my friends changed when I made money, because my old friends, actually told me i could make money with what I was doing. and making money with. that was when no matter the evidence i showed them, I knew they could never see past their own limitations.

so I let them Keep their own limitations. I didn't have to share those limitations with them any more.

 

[TommyBoy]

I totally agree with this thread and have done similar to my alcoholic friends. They were welcoming and generous friends. They even acknowledge and read about the fastlane people but always find a reason not to motivate themselves. Like you said "unlucky, not possible, fat chance etc."

Now that part is over, how do you make friends with the successful entrepreneurs, "better-than-you" people?
I've actually met a few in person and got their contact information, but find it too difficult to schedule a meeting with them or have a casual conversation?

Could it be because they are a few years older or could it be that I have to show my credibility (show off, brag)??

I prefer not to brag but when in context I mention my achievements or offer my advice. I've also heard offering advice is a turn off if the person is not asking for it.

 

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[DeletedUser2]

lucky for you, that's just a skill. meaning you can go and acquire it.

a couple books, on networking, and meeting friends/influencing people is great also.

how about just being curious, and be your self. bragging, makes you look the a$$ sometimes.

to meet others, ask about them. be curious, ask questions, LISTEN, and never ever, just be "waiting your turn to talk" actually listen.

people tell you how to talk to them, if you listen for it.

 

[Kak]

Well let him be a consumer. You be a producer and make your fortune.

He is also probably the kind that wants to raise corporate taxes and punish people for making profits.

Someone had to start every company. Entrepreneurship is in no way a scam. I would find new friends.

One of my mentors once told me, if you take the 8 people you associate with the most and average their incomes it should be close to yours. So associate with people who are more successful than you. :smxF:

 

[DeletedUser394]

There are almost 7 billion people on this Terraqueous Globe... plenty of awesome people to meet.

One of my old friends decided that drugs were more important than most other things... He's no longer my friend.
The same can be said of the seldom few who used to constantly bring me down.

I don't fret about it, because I'm constantly meeting great, new, like-minded people.

 

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[The_Spartan]

It's your life

Dude it's your life.10-20 years from now I do not know if this friend of yours would be around with you or not.

A change of place would be great if you can to start fresh.

If not I suggest getting more friends who think alike to atleast the influnce from him is lesser.

 

[ice]

Thank you all so much for the thoughtful words. :eusa_clap: