I don't want to push my problems on to this group. If I've learned one thing in the forum, it's that I need to stop bitching and add value to people's lives. I have the power to change my situation no matter how bad it seems. No matter how much hate I get. One day I'll be somewhere better. Suicide is never the F*cking answer because that means you let your haters win. Ok this will be my last post and I'll be using this forum under a different name to preserve my anonymity but still get the right mindset to succeed.
Before I go off to delete this account, another thing that I've realized is that gay people live life on hard mode. I'm not gay at all, but it's weird. My parents treat me like I'm gay because of pride month and holy shit I realize that many of you dress extra nice and are extra polite because you're indirectly telling other people you are not a threat and would like nothing more than be able to just hold hands in public. It's just so sad. Sometimes you get insulted by other gay people for not returning affection or because you're displaying affection in public and they're jealous because they're too self conscious to do it themselves. You get hate from straight people who are weirded out by your sexuality. Women treat you as their "gay friend" and have certain expectations of you that might not be true. Actually that's probably everybody except monks who just don't give a F*ck anymore.
I thought I lived in the most liberal place on Earth, truth is everybody judges you. Nothing has changed, everything is just hidden. The only thing is to find your tribe and I think I found it. I met a lot of motivated people in my workplace who are training us to be business owners through sales. These guys all work their asses off everyday. Many of them have problems just like me, but they make the most of their situation.
Do not be martyr.
Before I go off to delete this account, another thing that I've realized is that gay people live life on hard mode. I'm not gay at all, but it's weird. My parents treat me like I'm gay because of pride month and holy shit I realize that many of you dress extra nice and are extra polite because you're indirectly telling other people you are not a threat and would like nothing more than be able to just hold hands in public. It's just so sad. Sometimes you get insulted by other gay people for not returning affection or because you're displaying affection in public and they're jealous because they're too self conscious to do it themselves. You get hate from straight people who are weirded out by your sexuality. Women treat you as their "gay friend" and have certain expectations of you that might not be true. Actually that's probably everybody except monks who just don't give a F*ck anymore.
I thought I lived in the most liberal place on Earth, truth is everybody judges you. Nothing has changed, everything is just hidden. The only thing is to find your tribe and I think I found it. I met a lot of motivated people in my workplace who are training us to be business owners through sales. These guys all work their asses off everyday. Many of them have problems just like me, but they make the most of their situation.
Do not be martyr.
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