How will your relationships change now that you're a millionaire?

[SuccessInMind]

So it's five years into the future and you're now a millionaire. How will people react? Will they treat you the same, or do you think some things will change?

-When I think about my core group of friends, I imagine that they'll be amazed that someone they're very close to became so successful, but in the end they'll just be proud of me, end of story. I don't see my relationship with them really changing much, other than me having the time to hang out with them more.

-I imagine those fair-weather friends who used to laugh at my dreams will probably try to suck up to me and tell people "I knew he was gonna make it the whole time." I won't be hanging around these people and I'll be quick to call them out if I hear them tell these lies.

-When I think about my immediate family, I see a drastic change. I imagine my parents LOOKING UP to me and holding me in high regard rather than looking down on me like they used to when I was a college graduate without a job in the corporate world who had all these crazy ideas about becoming wealthy. I imagine my sisters feeling empowered to achieve their dreams now that they've seen me achieve mine. I imagine my cousins, uncles, aunties, and other relatives asking me for money all the time (not really looking forward to that).



How do you guys see your relationships changing when you become millionaires?

 

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[TOLDUSO]

Aside from financial success, I think one will find that any progression in their personal lives changes the relationships and types of relationships around them. I have whittled it down to one close friend that I still keep in contact with, and a handful of others that I converse with loosely and only on occasion, be it text, email, or other.

Marriage changed who my friends were. Some fell off the face of the earth when they realized they weren't gonna drag me out anymore on Friday night.

The military changed who my friends were. While I met some great people, there are maybe two of them that I still occasionally chat with from time to time. When I left active duty, we all sort of went our own ways.

School changed who my friends were. When I went back to school, I found that some of the other few friends that I had fallen apart from over the years started getting word that "He's going to school for what??!?" and then they started randomly emailing me asking how I was doing. "Yeah, I'm doing ok; Married, kids, school... And you? Oh yeah? So you're still on such and such street with the same played out couch playing call of duty, eh? Well, that's good I guess..."

I'm not anywhere near what I would consider successful yet, but I am positive that as I continue to progress, and people see or hear about it, they will continue to come out of the woodwork. I am lucky that I have narrowed it all down to a few close friends who I am positive wouldn't change if I hit it big. Those types are the only ones worth keeping around. People who you feel good about helping and people who are willing to drop everything to help you.

Those that find overnight success, no doubt, have another situation. Not only will the crowd come out of the woodworks, but it will be all at once: "Hey man! Remember me?!?" They will also face those directly around them who change the way they treat them and alter the way they act. No one is ever who you think they are. Even people I was in diapers with changed and drifted away at certain points in my life.

My opinion is that friends are extremely overrated and the sooner you cut it down to a few who are actual friends, regardless of your financial status, the better off you are and the quicker you can focus on getting into the Fastlane. Don't wait until you reach success to pity yourself with cutting people off. Do it now and move forward with your plans. Speed bumps only serve to slow you down, right?

 

[FDJustin]

I really can't predict that. I don't know what my family would think, we have very different opinions on what we should do, what success is, etc. Right now they see me as an uneducated bum with no concept of how the 'world' (I.E. the small slice of society in which they live) works. They're perfectly validated in that outlook, for the time being.

My mother would probably be proud. She was of course the most upset at my 'throwing away my future' all those years ago. I vaguely recall the argument boiling down to something like "You'll never get anywhere without an education!" and my stubborn words being something like, "I'll teach myself anything I want, and lie about training if I have to. No F*cking paper is going to say what I can achieve!" Things haven't turned out that way yet.. Not because they can't. Because I spent most of my time on other things.

Hmm. That's king of a tangent, sorry. Anyway, everyone else I figure will credit things like luck (If luck is a real force, it has forsaken me.), a 'one hit wonder', perhaps other people, god, or... Basically anything but the effort put forth by an uneducated bum that's no doubt inferior to any 18 year old highschooler who can do trigonometry.

Beyond that though, I don't really hang out with my current set of friends or family. That likely won't change, especially since I'll likely embrace the inner vagabond. I'll probably have some business 'friends' that are more like associates+, and spend time seeking out people who do interesting things to hang out with for a few days. I would be quite interested in getting to know some lapidary, or genetic engineer.

Five years though... Sounds about time to settle down, and have my midlife crisis. Guess I would bribe my way into some college or university somewhere and get to know a cute geek ten years younger than me. She would gladly argue with me about everything. She has to have enough thinksmarts to be right most of the time and really piss me off, of course.

 

[Anon3587x]

Things are heating up.

 

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[SuccessInMind]

Bateati, the process to success will definitely change you, no doubt about that and I'm looking forward to hearing about it! Do you think your success will change your relationships with people or do you think they will stay they same?

 

[SuccessInMind]

My opinion is that friends are extremely overrated and the sooner you cut it down to a few who are actual friends, regardless of your financial status, the better off you are and the quicker you can focus on getting into the Fastlane. Don't wait until you reach success to pity yourself with cutting people off. Do it now and move forward with your plans. Speed bumps only serve to slow you down, right?

True that. What are your thoughts on family? Do you think your family will change their view of you when you're a success?

 

[Anon3587x]

They have already changed. I've given up trying to get these people on the same page as me. I do not put myself in positions for somebody to doubt or put down my aspirations anymore.

 

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[SuccessInMind]

They have already changed.

I've given up trying to get these people on the same page as me.

I do not put myself in positions for somebody to doubt or put down my aspirations anymore.
I only associate with and respect like minded individuals. Nobody else understands and they can sit in modern day poverty for all I F*cking care. I'm no slave to anything.

That's wassup. F*ck slowlaners and their slowlane attitudes!

 

[TOLDUSO]

My opinion is that friends are extremely overrated and the sooner you cut it down to a few who are actual friends, regardless of your financial status, the better off you are and the quicker you can focus on getting into the Fastlane. Don't wait until you reach success to pity yourself with cutting people off. Do it now and move forward with your plans. Speed bumps only serve to slow you down, right?

True that. What are your thoughts on family? Do you think your family will change their view of you when you're a success?

I failed to mention that I have "whittled" some of my family out of my life as well... Haha.

As far as my immediate family, though, they would be proud, I'm sure, and maybe even a sigh of relief would be had by them... Ultimately, I could keep on with my current path and they would be just as happy now that they have grandchildren, daughter-in-law, etc...

 

[SuccessInMind]

I failed to mention that I have "whittled" some of my family out of my life as well... Haha.

As far as my immediate family, though, they would be proud, I'm sure, and maybe even a sigh of relief would be had by them... Ultimately, I could keep on with my current path and they would be just as happy now that they have grandchildren, daughter-in-law, etc...

Whittling your family members was probably for the best haha. I think my parents would also have a sigh of relief since they're so hung up on me getting a corporate job and would be proud that I accomplished something much better.

 

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[Rem]

Can someone be a millionaire and not have others besides your wife know it? That is the question. I think once people know then others around you will change and can definitely cause you to react differently to behavior you are unaccustomed to.

If you can keep it a secret, which I doubt because the new car, the new boat, and the nice house is probably a dead give-away.

 

[TOLDUSO]

Whittling your family members was probably for the best haha. I think my parents would also have a sigh of relief since they're so hung up on me getting a corporate job and would be proud that I accomplished something much better.

I guess I should clarify before I get labeled as some kind of jerk. Haha! It wasn't so much as I wrote them off, but rather more of just not associating with them. It's not close family, mostly cousins, etc. I love them all, and we all grew up together, but it just seems we don't associate as they are always nose deep in some sort of drama (divorce, trouble, finances, etc.) Geography plays a role in the relationships as well.

Anyone from this forum isn't going to be able to keep it secret if you make the big-time. That basis being termed on the typical Fastlaner's avatar!

 

[brianm4289]

the slowlane mentality and corporate job mindset do nothing but piss me off... I love when people who work for a fastlane employer laugh at my fastlane ideas... ummmmm don't they understand their employer is doing the same thing I am planning? yet its "impossible" or "that's already been done" comments rush in while they make some other fastlaner rich really smart thinking anyways about family and friends treating me differently once I make it big.. I know 100% for sure, none of my family will think anything negative, they will be extremely proud... as far as friends I have already pretty much weeded out the friends who would be haters anyways so I doubt the few true friends I have would view me differently maybe people will start taking me seriously for a change though lol

 

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[SuccessInMind]

I know 100% for sure, none of my family will think anything negative, they will be extremely proud... as far as friends I have already pretty much weeded out the friends who would be haters anyways so I doubt the few true friends I have would view me differently maybe people will start taking me seriously for a change though lol

Yeah I think that'll be the biggest change in terms of my relationships with people I meet from then on, which is that people will start taking me seriously instead of just writing me off as "another one of those guys who wants to try and get rich."

 

[MsPacMan]

In five years...

My immediate family will be soaking in the wealth I have achieve, while my outside family will be speaking rudely about me and what I became.

I am not concern of friends. There is none now, and in the future most likely the same.

My mother will just be wanting to take some of my wealth and quit her job. My grandmother would be shock, upset, and then join in with my mother.

My brother will be like "wtf! ooo,,, you're a millionaire...ooo? gimme some". My sister will be like "ewwww... ooo millions!"

Yes....

everyone else will think lowly of me, but I got my millions.

 

[DeletedUser394]

I live 2,400 miles away from most of my family (all of which have slowlane mentalities). In the process of moving, all of my old slowlane friends back home no longer have any influence on me.

I now have a clean slate, to find new friends and to network with new people. I'll seek out anyone with a fastlane mentality. That way we can learn from each other, discuss business, and even start joint ventures, and I won't have to worry about what my family might think, considering the vast distance between us.

It's a win, win, win, in my opinion.

 

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[Runum]

(Not millionaire status yet but getting there.)

I am learning on my road that more success is allowing me to be more generous. I have more tools and resources to loan or give to other people to help them. Example: I just loaned a generator to a church that needed one for their live manger scene. My family has been able to anonymously buy Christmas gifts for more underprivileged kids this year than ever. I also have more flexibility with my time and schedule than I have ever had.

I try to teach my students that learning gives you more tools with which to solve more problems. And I try to teach them to look at problems as opportunities for more success.

So I can say that the more success I have the better my relationships are with more people.

 

[NHS]

Best option is to keep your wealth to yourself. In my limited experience nothing good has come from others knowing I have more then them. Especially right now when everyone is hurting.

 

[PaulRobert]

I believe that your relations should not change. It really depends on you. The manner that you present your financial situation to your friends and family is a deciding factor of how they will treat you.

I will give an example...

You in 5 years: "I'm a millionaire!!! I never have to work again and have all the money the in the world!" That kind of statement will more than likely evoke jealousy and give the perception that since you have made it, you don't need your friends.

A classier way to say that you have attained significant success IMO is the following... "I have worked hard and been fortunate enough to make my life a bit easier."

If you honestly believe (speaking generally) that your friends and family will change because of your financial situation, you should find some new friends, but about your family, well I guess you have to put up with it. :smug2:

 

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[Rickson9]

I don't see any change. The only reason to think this way is if an individual is self centered enough to dream of a time when they can 'get back' at those who didn't believe in their dreams. My opinion only of course. I don't see why I would really care if people believed in my dreams or not.

In addition I don't see how an individual who used to 'look down' at you would suddenly change that opinion if you made a bit of money. I wouldn't hold your breath. I think it would think that the scorn would increase actually because now you would be adding a layer of potential envy.

No offense, but in my opinion the OP is just a nice dream that isn't even worth dreaming about in the first place, but I guess this is why fantasy sells in bookstores and movie theatres.

Best regards.

 

[SuccessInMind]

I don't see any change. The only reason to think this way is if an individual is self centered enough to dream of a time when they can 'get back' at those who didn't believe in their dreams. My opinion only of course. I don't see why I would really care if people believed in my dreams or not.

In addition I don't see how an individual who used to 'look down' at you would suddenly change that opinion if you made a bit of money. I wouldn't hold your breath. I think it would think that the scorn would increase actually because now you would be adding a layer of potential envy.

No offense, but in my opinion the OP is just a nice dream that isn't even worth dreaming about in the first place, but I guess this is why fantasy sells in bookstores and movie theatres.

Best regards.

Okay, I see your point. You say that you don't care less if people believe in your dreams or not and that's a great attitude. Just out of curiosity, if there were people close to you who didn't think you could make it and flat out shut down your ideas and dreams, would you still associate with them and treat them the same after you've succeeded and made your millions? I only ask because when I think about it, if I succeeded in making millions, I personally wouldn't associate with the people who shut down my dreams.

I ask only because you said you don't care if people believe in your dreams or not and I'm wondering if that's because you have done away with those types of people in your life or if you actually would still be friends with those types of people after you have made your millions.

Also, I'd like to think my OP was more based on real-life interactions that would occur after I succeed rather than on getting back at people. Because I wonder if the relationships I have now would be able to stay the same after a process/event like becoming a millionaire happens.

 

[Rickson9]

It is my opinion only, but how individuals will treat me will depend largely on how I've treated them. Despite what we believe, we may not have been perfect in how we've treated others and we must live with the consequences of that.

For me, money hasn't played any role in that.

Best regards.

 

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