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Hi, I'm Nichi.
I've been dissatisfied with the rat race since my early teens. Since I hit 13 years old I've felt something isn't right. That there has to be a better way than aspiring to a life of repeating "Yes Sir, no Sir, three bags full Sir!" with a sh- eating grin for the benefit of some git incapable of finding his own anus with two hands and a roadmap.
I managed to dull that instinct by avoiding thinking too hard about it, self-medicating with instant gratification and pouring myself into getting ahead the Slowlane way instead. Fast forward some years of bad decisions, lack of critical thinking and a refusal to hold myself accountable. My slide was fairly predictable: I lost my job, I turned into a fat slob, my better half got tired of my sh- and left and I ended up having open heart surgery for a condition I didn't know I had.
A couple of months ago I decided to stop making excuses, get my act together and get off my lazy a$$. I bought some decent walking shoes, invested in a blender and started educating myself on eating healthier and making better choices in general. Nothing dramatic, just commonsense. I've lost over 22lb at a safe and healthy rate. Faint hope has replaced disgust in the eyes of my local doctor. He speaks to me with respect now. It's a good feeling.
I figured I was on a roll so when I discovered these forums in my pursuit of learning how to make a better life for myself I signed up. I was happy to read the automated email, but apprehensive at the same time. I felt like being a member might be taking me one step closer to realizing my goals yet I had no confidence in myself. I was still limited by the self-defeating inner mantra that I wasn't good enough. So instead of coming and making my introductory on the 2nd of March when I was first accepted I ummed and ahhed for almost two months. Maybe two weeks ago (?) I summed up the courage to log in, stop procrastinating and start reading.
I've hardly slept. I've been absorbed by the threads, the teachers who have started them. I feel like a dried out sponge soaking up water I never knew I thirsted for. Now that I have food of knowledge I'm so hungry all the time. Not for a quick, get rich scheme. Not for some guy to turn around and solve my problems. I'm hungry for the process. It's the understanding I crave. I've read threads and all the accompanying comments, gone back and taken mental notes, woken up on my keyboard in my own drool. No I'm not bragging on myself, just trying to convey how I'm feeling and probably doing a piss-poor job of it.
Emboldened by all the benefits I've been receiving just from being a member of the forums, I finally bought the book last night. I started reading it at midnight. It's almost 6am. I finished reading it an hour ago. THIS IS IT. This is everything I needed to hear and then some. About where I'm going wrong, what I need to do for myself to get there, everything. It's such an exhilarating and terrifying thing to know that I wasn't wrong and there is a better way. The forums alone were such a gift and the book is worth a thousand times the monetary price I paid for it.
I didn't have anything else of value to add to the forums so I gave the truth since it is precious to me.
Thank you.
I've been dissatisfied with the rat race since my early teens. Since I hit 13 years old I've felt something isn't right. That there has to be a better way than aspiring to a life of repeating "Yes Sir, no Sir, three bags full Sir!" with a sh- eating grin for the benefit of some git incapable of finding his own anus with two hands and a roadmap.
I managed to dull that instinct by avoiding thinking too hard about it, self-medicating with instant gratification and pouring myself into getting ahead the Slowlane way instead. Fast forward some years of bad decisions, lack of critical thinking and a refusal to hold myself accountable. My slide was fairly predictable: I lost my job, I turned into a fat slob, my better half got tired of my sh- and left and I ended up having open heart surgery for a condition I didn't know I had.
A couple of months ago I decided to stop making excuses, get my act together and get off my lazy a$$. I bought some decent walking shoes, invested in a blender and started educating myself on eating healthier and making better choices in general. Nothing dramatic, just commonsense. I've lost over 22lb at a safe and healthy rate. Faint hope has replaced disgust in the eyes of my local doctor. He speaks to me with respect now. It's a good feeling.
I figured I was on a roll so when I discovered these forums in my pursuit of learning how to make a better life for myself I signed up. I was happy to read the automated email, but apprehensive at the same time. I felt like being a member might be taking me one step closer to realizing my goals yet I had no confidence in myself. I was still limited by the self-defeating inner mantra that I wasn't good enough. So instead of coming and making my introductory on the 2nd of March when I was first accepted I ummed and ahhed for almost two months. Maybe two weeks ago (?) I summed up the courage to log in, stop procrastinating and start reading.
I've hardly slept. I've been absorbed by the threads, the teachers who have started them. I feel like a dried out sponge soaking up water I never knew I thirsted for. Now that I have food of knowledge I'm so hungry all the time. Not for a quick, get rich scheme. Not for some guy to turn around and solve my problems. I'm hungry for the process. It's the understanding I crave. I've read threads and all the accompanying comments, gone back and taken mental notes, woken up on my keyboard in my own drool. No I'm not bragging on myself, just trying to convey how I'm feeling and probably doing a piss-poor job of it.
Emboldened by all the benefits I've been receiving just from being a member of the forums, I finally bought the book last night. I started reading it at midnight. It's almost 6am. I finished reading it an hour ago. THIS IS IT. This is everything I needed to hear and then some. About where I'm going wrong, what I need to do for myself to get there, everything. It's such an exhilarating and terrifying thing to know that I wasn't wrong and there is a better way. The forums alone were such a gift and the book is worth a thousand times the monetary price I paid for it.
I didn't have anything else of value to add to the forums so I gave the truth since it is precious to me.
Thank you.
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