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Feeing joyful then feeling like crud

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Brian Suh

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Escaping the matrix day by day, I literally feel like a child. Not in a bad way like I am immature but I am looking at life in a fresh way. I’m less judgemental of people and view everyone like my friend. However my parents are EXTREMELY negative. They are set in their ways and won’t change. They are decaying and I can see it in their eyes. I love them dearly but whenever I see them they think I’m stupid for not going the traditional route and try to control my life. I am 23 so I am still quite young and feel a bit of attachment to them and care what they think. I am thinking of just cutting them out completely but family is important. Why can’t peolle just respect others opinion? Sorry for the rant, need to get it out there so I don’t strew on it.
 

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The-J

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Gonna go out on a limb and guess that you live in a 1st world country and your parents are immigrants.

Here's the deal: you're not going to be able to change their mind until you get some success.

Accept that, and accept the consequences of that. If you're financially supported by your parents, expect to be cut off. Expect to be given the silent treatment. Expect to be seen as a disappointment.

Sucks, but it's what it is. They're still your parents, and you can still love them. Maybe their love for you is conditional, that's a reality you might have to face. But you can still love them because they don't know what they don't know.

When you succeed, they still might be disappointed because their advice = gold, apparently lol. But they'll at least be happy that you're not homeless and will be glad that you made something of yourself.

So, what do you do?

Step 0: Make some money and move out. If you're already here (maybe you have a 9-5 and an apartment), then move onto Step 1.

Step 1: Start something and make it work. First small, then big. Take their calls, but don't take all of their calls. Keep them updated, but don't tell them everything.

My parents disapproved of all my decisions until the day they realized that I was self reliant and could pay my way on my own without their money or guidance. I still get the 'you know, I still think you could have done well as an engineer' but it's fine. I'm fine.
 
OP
OP
Brian Suh

Brian Suh

Silver Contributor
Speedway Pass
May 19, 2018
479
543
241
Gonna go out on a limb and guess that you live in a 1st world country and your parents are immigrants.

Here's the deal: you're not going to be able to change their mind until you get some success.

Accept that, and accept the consequences of that. If you're financially supported by your parents, expect to be cut off. Expect to be given the silent treatment. Expect to be seen as a disappointment.

Sucks, but it's what it is. They're still your parents, and you can still love them. Maybe their love for you is conditional, that's a reality you might have to face. But you can still love them because they don't know what they don't know.

When you succeed, they still might be disappointed because their advice = gold, apparently lol. But they'll at least be happy that you're not homeless and will be glad that you made something of yourself.

So, what do you do?

Step 0: Make some money and move out. If you're already here (maybe you have a 9-5 and an apartment), then move onto Step 1.

Step 1: Start something and make it work. First small, then big. Take their calls, but don't take all of their calls. Keep them updated, but don't tell them everything.

My parents disapproved of all my decisions until the day they realized that I was self reliant and could pay my way on my own without their money or guidance. I still get the 'you know, I still think you could have done well as an engineer' but it's fine. I'm fine.
Awesome. Got to break the mold.
 

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