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Depressed to happy


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Mar 22, 2018
[First, best regards to the people reading this, before telling you my story, i'm french,so basically not a native english speaker, but as i have read a lot of books in english and watch a lot of movies, i think my writing should not be terrible. ]

I'm 21 years old, living in a medium city in France, as I remember I always want to became a good person, with good behavior and a lot of love to give (ya ya, honestly)

School wasn't my playground, I always loved helping others, maybe too much, it's started earlier with my friends, they were asking me to write a letter for a girl they want to seduce. []And it was really challenging me to help sometimes these weird guys.

The things were all right till my 12 years old. I think it’s the hardest part of my life, and maybe it’s yours too, you didn’t even know this, but i created this thread to help you if you are in the same situation.

At the age of 12, I discovered video games, it’s something all peoples have played at least one time in their life, even your grands parents may have.
I loved them, at first i was passionate about my xbox, literally, eating,sleeping video games. Even with my friends, no girlfriend, no partys, and i wasn’t ugly at all, i was just addicted by video games, like my entire life count on it. If you recognize yourself in the last phrases, please, just sell your shitty console, or put it in a box.
At my age of 15, I entered in « lycée », it’s what you guys call high-school. Not even a girlfriend, still no party, and not many friends as the others.

But you know, video games still there, so i wasn’t paying attention to these things, i was just focusing to listen my parents to go to school and then we will see what happens with the future, i don’t care as long as i play all saturday night on call of duty. (No jokes, it was real)

Since the beginning of my thread i haven’t talked of my parents, so let’s talk of what i would call the « break », you know the time when all things fall, when you open your eyes and see whats happens around you.

My mother told me she got skin cancer, she was truly depressed, sad, and i was terrified. My father wasn’t paying attention, he was just saying « it’s ok, she can still go to the hospital and the odds she survive are enough », he didn’t even loved her, he was just sitting in the house, like a ghost, and never talking. One day they decided to divorce, my life was terrible at this moment, and it couldn’t go worse.

Here is the big part, i left school at the age of 16, too depressed, no interest in the future, no more interest in the others people, dreams fall….
Let’s cry together (lol)

Actually it isn’t the goal of this thread, i’m not a whiner, not a aw. I want to help people who are in this situation, maybe you are depressed, maybe you think you will never achieve something good, but guess what, i bet you can recover it.

My lifestyle when i left school :

Play -eat- play- sleep repeat

No family visit, no friends visit, just play to escape the reality, the shitty reality
As the times goes, i became more and more inactive, so I started to walk the night, and discover what life was when all people were sleeping.

I learned a lot, maybe it will sound dumb, but i guarantee you have to try this, just walk the entire night in your city, and notice what happens. Notice the feeling you have.It’s a great habit i experienced for 4 months, every day i saw a different thing and learned something different. By the way, I was alone, I know exactly what happened in my city these month, robbery, sexual harassment, sexual abuse, all the bad things. And I ended thinking « I can’t be one of them, I can’t be like my father depressed and living like a ghost, never talking to someone », it’s what I call my « F*ck this event » as MJ says in « unscripted ».

Just a month after, I went back to the school, for 1 year, and started to being better, I stopped playing video games, I sold my PS4, I started to talk with the others people and tried to became nice with the others too.

My life was just really better than I could imagine, it was like I travelled this desert that everyone talk about AND NOW I could be happy.

At the age of 17 I started online betting on football,(new addiction), I earned a lot more money than people of my age could have.

Every month, I won approximately 5k. It’s a lot in France, so I was feeling rich, you know when you life smell shit and you earn a lot of money, it’s hard to stay realistic. BALENCIAGA, big trips, expensive clothes, expensive restaurants…
I tried all of these things before my 18, who is the same as 21 years old in US.
My feeling was really unbeatable, that dopamine rush when you win 1 k in 1 day is just amazing, I was really addicted to the money, and it have an impact on my life either. When I started to lose, it reflected on my relationship, I was arrogant, non-happy, and also annoying for others.

I stopped betting, because it was something impacting my life. And if I have a tips for you guys, if something impact your life negatively, if you became annoying with others, if you have a bad mood because of something, it is definitely bad; and you should think to stop it.

The real entrepreneurial journey start at the age of 19, when I discover the power of ecommerce, and specially shopify. I created a drop shipping shopify store (yes again not a guru), and succeed with my 4 try. A pretty good amount of 2200 profit, who still good for living. But something was missing, money is not enough to fuel your life and your motivation. You have to be useful (MASLOW PYRAMID…), you have to help others, and by drop shipping crappy aliexpress shit, I wasn’t proud, I didn’t find my self valuable or good enough to call my self as an entrepreneur.

Now my journey has changed, my destination too.

I’m no longer interested in instant gratification, that dopamine rush started to decrease as the time goes, I know my duty is to help others people, no matter what I have experienced, it all starts by this thread and my little contribution for the forum. I’m going to start doing some freelance copywriting, as i followed SinisterLex post’s and videos, maybe on Upwork, or malt, who is in France, the same as upwork.

My goal is 2000/mo with freelance, then I could jump on the next big thing ….tadammm building an amazon brand!
Not so surprising, but i really like commerce, and by having a brand i think it could be really valuable and ethically honest.

Now guys, hope you still reading, and if you have any question and feel in the same situation I was, depressed, lost, without live motivation,just feel free to PM me or something like that, I would really like to help you.
No matter what it costs in time. Just really pm me.

Thanks MJ for your awesome books, if my post is too long or don’t correspond to the rule of the forum just delete it.

Thank you!
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MJ DeMarco

I followed the science; all I found was money.
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Jul 23, 2007
Thanks MJ for your awesome books, if my post is too long or don’t correspond to the rule of the forum just delete it.

You're fine! Thanks for posting and sharing your story. And welcome to our little corner of the web.

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