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Cure for Depression is...

Almantas

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Hi dudes and dudettes!

This lovely post of mine that's written from a depth of my heart is geared towards our forum newbies and guys who are still looking for a silver bullet to headshot that ugly depression.

I have been battling depression for two years. It had been my toughest battle to date. It almost took my life (I say 'it', because when you're really depressed it feels like some kind of devil has squeezed into your spirit and makes you act in destructive ways).

Tears, multiple failures and sweat aside I found a silver bullet. A silver bullet that I have always overlooked and ignored. Why? Because it sounded too simple to be effective and I was looking for a complex solution to my seemingly complex problem. I was convinced simple solution isn't gonna do the trick to solve my complex problem...

...until I exhausted most of my inventory and was left with the last toy in my sandbox. The very same silver bullet I came across almost two years ago...however I was too blind to see it back then and it seemed just a regular bullet. That silver bullet my friends was 'ACTION'.

I took my first solid step of action this January. And guess what? My depression crawled back to its darkest corners. I made only one simple choice - to take regular action. If I felt bad, did I stop? No damn way! I took even more action. Result? In only one and a half month I accomplished more than I did in previous entire two years and my depression is literally gone.

At first it felt weird, how come it disappeared so quickly. I thought it will come back, and it slowly did when I pressed breaks on my progress. As soon as I hit gas again depression disappeared once again. It's kind of I have two choices:

1) Take no action and be depressed and live without a purpose...
2) Take constant action to beat depression and live with a purpose!

I will finish my babble here and now, I could go on and on, but don't want to waste your precious time...

Do you feel anxious? You know why? Because you have too much free time amigo!
Do you feel depressed? You know why? Yep, you're right - because you have too much free time!

So, stop reading self-help books, stop lurking forums looking for answer and don't rely on professional help (unless your condition is critical) - the answer is within you and a very simple one - take action, not tomorrow, not next week, NOW! TAKE DAMN ACTION NOW!

Thanks for reading through and best of luck!

P.S. I am ready to help everyone who is battling depression. Instead of walking in shadows, shoot me a message and I'll do my best to grab you out into the daylight!

Best wishes all!
 

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Almantas

Almantas

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Sounds like apathy not depression.

You cannot clean an attic or basement unless you turn the lights on.
Call it whatever you want. Everybody has probably different definition of depression: lack of interest, lack of self-respect, lack of vision, etc. I am simply saying that our mind can not process two thoughts at once and if you do something constructive and occupy your mind with constructive thoughts that produce positive results it's literally impossible to have negative thoughts at the same time. Unless you stop thinking/doing something positive.

I am no lecturer or expert on a depression topic. I am simply trying to help at least one folk by sharing what I learned from my own experience. I don't care if I get labeled or spit upon, the desire to help someone who is feeling like giving up on life is bigger than everything I described combined.
 

Lex DeVille

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Everybody does have a different definition of depression because everybody experiences depression differently. For more on this see this Ted Talk by Lisa Feldman Barrett:


Everybody has a different experience of depression, and each experience of depression, even within an individual, is somewhat different from the previous experience. This is true of all emotions as modern science is beginning to reveal.

I agree action is a useful response in some situations. Not to go too deep into personality profiling, but those who tend to get stuck in analysis paralysis can benefit from action.

There are other situations when action might not be the solution (particularly thinking of people who take too much action, but fail because lack of analysis).

Of course, all of this is under the assumption that depression is an enemy that needs to be defeated.

In my opinion, the experience of depression goes a little deeper than that, because when we break down the actual experience, we can pinpoint specific emotions hiding underneath.

Since we can do so, it means depression is a label, and is only negative to the extent we label the underlying emotions as being negative in our lives.

I have experiences of depression fairly regularly. When I don't manage those feelings well, they tend to become more negative than useful.

However, when I do manage them, I find myself using the experience to fuel my creative tendencies. Some of my greatest written works were created while experiencing what others would classify as depression.

Strangely, I just wrote an article about this. Not specifically about depression, but about the way we frame some thoughts, feelings, and experiences as "negative."

We label them negative, and in doing so, we acknowledge that they are somehow "bad." Since they are "bad" we seek to avoid those thoughts and feelings, because they must therefore = discomfort, and we want to avoid discomfort.

But I'd wager most of us know avoidance is a less than useful approach when it comes to business and life.

Now, none of this is to say depression is good.

Most certainly shouldn't seek it out.

But when we break down the label into the emotional experiences that construct it, then it's possible to tap into useful emotions hidden underneath that previously might have been written off because of a simple label.

Looking to the past, there are many creatives who manifest brilliant works of art while "suffering" from depression. Many of those works of art carry deeply moving images, sounds, or other stimuli relating to sadness, grief, drama, destruction, anger, sorrow etc.

Funny thing is, had the artists been feeling Mary Poppins...their greatest creations probably wouldn't exist.

None of this is a cure for depression. Just my thoughts on the subject.

It's a label given to a emotions constructed based on concepts from our past experiences. There are things we can do to manage the experience of depression when it arises. However; it's also possible that if we simply question ourselves about what we're feeling, we might discover sometimes even the negative parts of life can be useful.

All that said...I'm not a physician, and if you're experiencing depression and feel it is a problem in your life, you should seek diagnosis and treatment by a medical professional.
 
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Almantas

Almantas

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Everybody does have a different definition of depression because everybody experiences depression differently. For more on this see this Ted Talk by Lisa Feldman Barrett:


Everybody has a different experience of depression, and each experience of depression, even within an individual, is somewhat different from the previous experience. This is true of all emotions as modern science is beginning to reveal.

I agree action is a useful response in some situations. Not to go too deep into personality profiling, but those who tend to get stuck in analysis paralysis can benefit from action.

There are other situations when action might not be the solution (particularly thinking of people who take too much action, but fail because lack of analysis).

Of course, all of this is under the assumption that depression is an enemy that needs to be defeated.

In my opinion, the experience of depression goes a little deeper than that, because when we break down the actual experience, we can pinpoint specific emotions hiding underneath.

Since we can do so, it means depression is a label, and is only negative to the extent we label the underlying emotions as being negative in our lives.

I have experiences of depression fairly regularly. When I don't manage those feelings well, they tend to become more negative than useful.

However, when I do manage them, I find myself using the experience to fuel my creative tendencies. Some of my greatest written works were created while experiencing what others would classify as depression.

Strangely, I just wrote an article about this. Not specifically about depression, but about the way we frame some thoughts, feelings, and experiences as "negative."

We label them negative, and in doing so, we acknowledge that they are somehow "bad." Since they are "bad" we seek to avoid those thoughts and feelings, because they must therefore = discomfort, and we want to avoid discomfort.

But I'd wager most of us know avoidance is a less than useful approach when it comes to business and life.

Now, none of this is to say depression is good.

Most certainly shouldn't seek it out.

But when we break down the label into the emotional experiences that construct it, then it's possible to tap into useful emotions hidden underneath that previously might have been written off because of a simple label.

Looking to the past, there are many creatives who manifest brilliant works of art while "suffering" from depression. Many of those works of art carry deeply moving images, sounds, or other stimuli relating to sadness, grief, drama, destruction, anger, sorrow etc.

Funny thing is, had the artists been feeling Mary Poppins...their greatest creations probably wouldn't exist.

None of this is a cure for depression. Just my thoughts on the subject.

It's a label given to a emotions constructed based on concepts from our past experiences. There are things we can do to manage the experience of depression when it arises. However; it's also possible that if we simply question ourselves about what we're feeling, we might discover sometimes even the negative parts of life can be useful.

All that said...I'm not a physician, and if you're experiencing depression and feel it is a problem in your life, you should seek diagnosis and treatment by a medical professional.
TBH I don't know what to believe anymore, lol. It's obvious that I labeled myself as depressed without even properly knowing what depression is. Anyways, whatever I felt action cured it. I feel super-happy for my own sake, but hoped to somehow share it with others too by lifting them out of the shadows.

Thanks for your insightful response, will definitely take some notes and digest what you've just written. This is real critical thinking in action here. Thanks again!
 

SPEEDratRACER

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This is a topic that is near and dear to my heart because depression and suicidal thoughts are part of what crafter me into the man I am today, for better or worse.

I don't want to attack the creator of the thread because I know he means well, but this is not the Silver bullet to beat depression, At least not in my experience. From my perception there is no quick fix to depression and working hard only serves to take your mind off of it in the short term, but is not the long term solution.

My depression was only "beat" when I confronted the source of it, my dad. He'd walked out on my family when I was 12 and I struggled with depression for years after. One day I confronted him, told him everything, including the depression and near attempt at suicide, and that was the beginning of the end for me. It took time after that but it eventually began to alleviate, although even now I wouldn't say I "beat" it. Two years ago it came rushing back for months, but I powered through. It's something that could turn up again, and I likely will have to live the rest of my life dealing with it from time to time.

In closing, if you are dealing with depression seek out professional help, and DON'T internalize it. It might seem like noone would understand or thst your not worth saving, but people will understand and you are worth saving. Its a terrible demon to have and i wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
 

PureA

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So great to hear man.

I recently underwent a similar realisation.

I always thought I was in entrepreneurship for the freedom. Whilst words are clumsy in this situation (e.g. define freedom), I reached a place where I didn't have to do anything I was 'free'. I had set up my business ventures so I could literally be completely free without any responsibility. Saddest time of my life (I'm 23 - so don't know how much that says). Spent about 6 months struggling to get out of bed... It sounds pathetic, I know, but if you been there, you know how it is. I was in a downward spiral. (Whilst I was in this state I knew that I'd figure things out and be back - the underlying belief was always there, I will never lose faith in the big picture.). I literally didn't know what was wrong with me.

A vacant mind, one without burden, meaning, responsibility, purpose, is the most prime candidate for self destruction. Throughout our evolution we've had problems, goals, burden, hardship, its hardwired in our DNA. We think we want to be 'free'. But really, your brain doesn't, and it will soon show you that by the way you feel without any responsibility.

With all that being said, I don't dismiss the idea of freedom, like I said, words are clumsy. Freedom in my eyes, is picking your wars, choosing your burden.

If we are static we shrink.

This was a great lesson to learn so early. I know that I will never be seduced into nothingness ever again, and for that I am grateful.
 

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@Almantas I really like the post and I also admire your struggle and that you came out a winner.

I play the devil's advocate a lot but this doesn't mean you are wrong (or right). The only thing I have learnt recently is that the same statement can be wrong and right at the same time so it's better to take it 'as is', without any judgement... Sorry had to put this comment.

So, stop reading self-help books, stop lurking forums looking for answer and don't rely on professional help (unless your condition is critical) - the answer is within you and a very simple one - take action, not tomorrow, not next week, NOW! TAKE DAMN ACTION NOW!
I believe that this is not the best advice, at least for me (yet being a great advice - to progress we need to take action). As with most of advice...It has to be tailored*.

How to get out of depression?

Let me explain. It is out of context too... Because your context has been 25+ years of life and 2 years, or even more, of being depressed. You came to the conclusion that you need to take action. But not after a year, not after a month. It took you this time and not less. What I am saying is you needed the time and the depression to come up with this solution. As stupid as it may sound. This was your process. The event? Taking action (well sort of...). I feel that taking action was the 'easy part'. The difficult part was what preceded it.

I enjoy more reading about your depression (sorry, don't confuse with enjoying you being depressed) and your journey there than the advice you give - take action. Because what you had been doing before getting out of it is what led you to this final step - taking action.

This is maybe only me...

*Everyone is different and any advice should be tailored...

But when we break down the label into the emotional experiences that construct it, then it's possible to tap into useful emotions hidden underneath that previously might have been written off because of a simple label.
Exactly these are my thoughts. We need emotions. Bad or good because they indicate what is going on with us and our lives. We are not taught to deal with bad emotions (well other than 'don't cry, don't be a baby' etc etc... really harmful.....). Good either... Most of the time we are taught to sit straight, not cause trouble and memorise books, and then write down what we memorised...

I don't want to attack the creator of the thread because I know he means well, but this is not the Silver bullet to beat depression, At least not in my experience. From my perception there is no quick fix to depression and working hard only serves to take your mind off of it in the short term, but is not the long term solution.
Exactly Man...

In closing, if you are dealing with depression seek out professional help, and DON'T internalize it. It might seem like noone would understand or thst your not worth saving, but people will understand and you are worth saving. Its a terrible demon to have and i wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
This is actually gold advice. Seek help. Don't internalise but talk about it because it might save your life.

Cure for depression is to learn how to deal with emotions, what causes them, but firstly seek help. Professional. If you feel really bad you might not get out of it alive (most suicides are committed by men).

Don't internalise. Don't fight it. Accept it. What else? I don't know.... it really depends from case to case... we need bad emotions, the problem is if we don't shake off them but keep being like this all the time. For whatever reason...
 

Yzn

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Great input.

This world is like a rollercoaster, one moment you're up, one moment you're down. I think if we just focus on the ups and downs, we will always get stuck in those moments.

It's better to focus on keeping the train moving...
 

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A_Random_Guy

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Well said!
Human brain can process a lot of information. The more we put it to use, the more it craves for more.
Consistency in taking action keeps the mind involved in taking action. Meeting people, taking courses, learning stuff, working, etc. keeps us alive. We are feeding a lot of emotions and memories to our brain.

The moment we stop, we are stuck with a bunch of memories. We lose track of time. From my past experience, there were times when I didn't know what day of the week it was, days when I didn't get out of bed, didn't eat, didn't take a bath for a week etc.

The only thing that repeats in your mind is the cause of your depression and you start overthinking of the various ways it will affect your future. Say you were rejected by your crush in school: you'll keep thinking of all the time you had together, the shame you'll face if you ever meet her again, and all the humiliation you'll face from your friends. These imaginary events will keep repeating in your mind like slow poison and you'll start cowering away from facing your friends again. You'll remain the same while getting depressed over the fact that your friends are improving while you are not. The longer you stay that way, the worse you'll feel about yourself.

The best way to get past depression is to constantly involve ourselves with life. Work, study, interact, enjoy! Making more memories will slowly wash away those fears. No motivational videos will help overcome depression. Taking action is the only solution.
 

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Great input.

This world is like a rollercoaster, one moment you're up, one moment you're down. I think if we just focus on the ups and downs, we will always get stuck in those moments.

It's better to focus on keeping the train moving...
If we don't focus on our emotions we end up even worse. Our bodies are telling us many different things.

It's like keeping the train moving but on the wrong track, to use your metaphor.

One problem is that... or even many problems associated with interpreting what our bodies are saying.

Some people claim that our DNA can contain information reaching up to past seven generations. So traumatic, non-traumatic experiences could be in our DNA (mostly traumatic, why would there be something that didn't impact your ancestors...).

Take into account also upbringing (relationship with your parents), environment, times you were born in and it makes a really difficult combination to decipher.

Consistency in taking action keeps the mind involved in taking action.
This is exactly what I wrote about the wrong track. If you stop and look back to see "I have been on the wrong track for 30 years or more" it's not that easy to change tracks in an instant... It may cause trauma, depression and many other things... All depends of our attitude towards it. Or you realised that you have been there for 30 years and great. You can change the tracks (leave your job, leave your family and kids, start from 0...?). THese aren't things that you can just change in a blink of an eye...
 

A_Random_Guy

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This is exactly what I wrote about the wrong track. If you stop and look back to see "I have been on the wrong track for 30 years or more" it's not that easy to change tracks in an instant... It may cause trauma, depression and many other things... All depends of our attitude towards it. Or you realised that you have been there for 30 years and great. You can change the tracks (leave your job, leave your family and kids, start from 0...?). THese aren't things that you can just change in a blink of an eye...
What the OP and I meant was that "taking action" is the solution for someone becoming a NEET, someone who is doing NOTHING in his life other than spending time on phone, eating, sleeping and repeating a dull day everyday.

What you meant is true for a different context. I remember watching the seminar of a CEO of a photographic website(who is currently a motivational speaker) where he said that no choices in life are "good "or "bad". There is a grey area.

After graduating from high school, he decided to take a job in a call-center, which paid approx 250$ per month in India, which is barely enough to live by. He applied for the written text and passed it. [Event 1]
He then appeared for the interview round and failed it. [Event 2]
Most of the students graduating from high school don't have a clue about what to do in their life. On the other hand, he faced the reality of job crisis, when he realized that he failed to qualify for a job which is one of the lowest paying in the IT firm. This motivated him to search up the web for freelancing and ways to earn money online. Finally, he became an Entrepreneur. [Event 3]

Is Event 2 good or bad? What if he had passed the interview round and got that job? Would he be earning billions as he is now?

I am pretty sure what you mean is similar to this case. Someone who is working hard and consistently in the slow lane should stop and think. What we mean is someone who has stopped for months, and is staying in the same place, thinking and thinking without doing anything.
 

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