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RANT Why do we love losers?

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Patrick Hughes

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I feel too many people are soft today.

We accept failure almost as equally as a success.

They try to make all the kids feel like winners and have no one feel the grief of loss.

If you never taste defeat, how can you truly taste victory?

I just wonder why we are accepting stuff like this and allowing people to say it's ok to be crap and mediocre.

The way kids all get trophies. The way garbage musicians are even called musicians?

Movies that just suck winning awards.

Mumble rap?

I'm confused.

The highest paid YouTuber last year was a 7-year-old reviewing toys. (Love this kid though, he is a legend. Little jealous.)

Everything seems backward.

It's almost as if the dumber I act and more drama I acquire in my life, I get treated like a winner.

Maybe I'm just being cynical today but I just constantly see stupidity surround me and it is glorified.

Maybe I'm the dumb one?

Why is it this way?


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minivanman

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I might be just as dumb because I feel the same way. I was the 2nd fastest runner in my class and it used to p!ss me off! When I was in band, if I got 2nd chair, I'd get p!ssed off and next week I'd be back in 1st chair. A few months ago I was a 53 year old whiner because we went to a big time asphalt race and I finished 4th. My wife says, if it wasn't for that slick corner (rained in the middle of the race and I spun out), you would have got 2nd. 2nd? LOL She doesn't realize, 2nd is the 1st loser!!!

I'm not sure where our society is heading but it doesn't look good.
 
OP
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Patrick Hughes

Patrick Hughes

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I might be just as dumb because I feel the same way. I was the 2nd fastest runner in my class and it used to p!ss me off! When I was in band, if I got 2nd chair, I'd get p!ssed off and next week I'd be back in 1st chair. A few months ago I was a 53 year old whiner because we went to a big time asphalt race and I finished 4th. My wife says, if it wasn't for that slick corner (rained in the middle of the race and I spun out), you would have got 2nd. 2nd? LOL She doesn't realize, 2nd is the 1st loser!!!

I'm not sure where our society is heading but it doesn't look good.
If you ain't first, you're last lol.

It gives me solace to see someone else out there who agrees.

2nd sucks! I hate losing and I want to be better. I always try to push harder after a defeat just like you.

Some people think the average is good. Totally confounded.

I don't think it looks good either.
 

James Cozens

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I think those types of people love to see others fail because it makes them feel better about their meaningless lives.

I have an attractive & ambitious but insecure sister who hangs around UGLY girls with no ambition. I suspect she likes to do this as it makes her feel better about herself - almost like the big fish in the small pond.
 

Frank H.

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Good post! Personally I absolutely hate losing, however I'm neutral when I win. Each person is different.
 

luniac

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I feel its not about winning, its about doing your best.

I still respect the man who tried all his life to accomplish a goal but failed spectacularly. At least he tried, and that's all one can do in the real world.
It's the only variable you can honest to god control absolutely.
 

Ninjakid

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No, what you're saying is not true. You've just adopted a cynical outlook.

And it's extremely self-centred. Basically you're saying "I'm smart and everyone else is dumb."

The way kids all get trophies. The way garbage musicians are even called musicians?

Movies that just suck winning awards.

Mumble rap?
Is everyone else wrong, and just you're right? If something is popular, it's obviously providing value to lots of people.

The highest paid YouTuber last year was a 7-year-old reviewing toys. (Love this kid though, he is a legend. Little jealous.)
The market decides, not your ego.

It's almost as if the dumber I act and more drama I acquire in my life, I get treated like a winner.
This says more about yourself and the type of people you surround yourself with. Small-minds require constant validation, and they get it through drama rather than anything constructive or useful.

Maybe I'm just being cynical today but I just constantly see stupidity surround me and it is glorified.
Again this says more about you. It's what you choose to pay attention to.
I wonder how many times Ronaldo mopes about "stupidity" around him. Probably never, he's too busy playing football.

Why is it this way?
What is "it"? What is "this way"?

How often do you contemplate why the stars form certain constellations? Do you think about it more than what you're saying here? Do you think the constellations are not real, but we just see them that way because of where we view them from Earth?

You don't because of your perception. Reality is all about our perception, and what we choose to pay attention to.

People will always pay attention to what resonates with them. We don't realize it most of the time, but our emotions are quite primitive. Basically everything we look at and pay attention to is a result of our limbic system, further validated by the cortex.

Even the pursuit of wealth is a primal drive. Our cortex equates money with food and security which is felt in our basal ganglia (reptilian brains) and to an extent our limbic system. This gives us a sense of security.

Really, all of us are basically the same. We're 99.99% identical to each other. We have different ways of going about our needs.

The preferences of the masses are not less worthy of your own. Rationalizing why your values are more important than other people's is nothing more than narcissism. It's easy to feel cynical when you separation from everyone else.

If something promotes greater well-being for people, then I think it's good, no matter how stupid it may seem to some.

And here's a little optimism: People today are much kinder and understanding to each other than they have ever been in history. You're extremely lucky to be alive today.

I think you should pull an Andy Black and be kinder to others.


 

TreyAllDay

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Think you need a balance. I often feel like failure gets glorified in a way it shouldn't. I have a friend who's started 8 useless businesses and he plays them off like he enjoys the failure because it's a learning experience.

That being said - you need to understand failure is a huge part of success. Just gotta find the balance.

Sent from my SM-A520W using Tapatalk
 

Bryaninbangkok

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Most people are "losers" (we can't all be winners) so they follow people they can relate to. The youtube channels I follow about value/growth investing, trading has very few followers, yet there are so many silly youtube channels with millions of people following them, I am often amazed, I guess not many people are looking to make more money or improve their lives, but they just like to moan when they don't have enough, then go back to following people that are losers to make them feel better.
 

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OP
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Patrick Hughes

Patrick Hughes

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No, what you're saying is not true. You've just adopted a cynical outlook.

Perhaps it's because of the life experience that I come off as this, but it's me contemplating reality. I don't believe I'm better than everyone, thanks.

And it's extremely self-centred. Basically you're saying "I'm smart and everyone else is dumb."



Is everyone else wrong, and just you're right? If something is popular, it's obviously providing value to lots of people.

Never did I say I was right, lol.

The market decides, not your ego.

I clearly said the kid was legendary because of how great his life is.

This says more about yourself and the type of people you surround yourself with. Small-minds require constant validation, and they get it through drama rather than anything constructive or useful.



Again this says more about you. It's what you choose to pay attention to.
I wonder how many times Ronaldo mopes about "stupidity" around him. Probably never, he's too busy playing football.



What is "it"? What is "this way"?

How often do you contemplate why the stars form certain constellations? Do you think about it more than what you're saying here? Do you think the constellations are not real, but we just see them that way because of where we view them from Earth?

You don't because of your perception. Reality is all about our perception, and what we choose to pay attention to.

People will always pay attention to what resonates with them. We don't realize it most of the time, but our emotions are quite primitive. Basically everything we look at and pay attention to is a result of our limbic system, further validated by the cortex.

Even the pursuit of wealth is a primal drive. Our cortex equates money with food and security which is felt in our basal ganglia (reptilian brains) and to an extent our limbic system. This gives us a sense of security.

Really, all of us are basically the same. We're 99.99% identical to each other. We have different ways of going about our needs.

The preferences of the masses are not less worthy of your own. Rationalizing why your values are more important than other people's is nothing more than narcissism. It's easy to feel cynical when you separation from everyone else.

If something promotes greater well-being for people, then I think it's good, no matter how stupid it may seem to some.

And here's a little optimism: People today are much kinder and understanding to each other than they have ever been in history. You're extremely lucky to be alive today.

I think you should pull an Andy Black and be kinder to others.

^As you come to my post to diss every single thing I say and provide 0 positive feedback.

I don't even want to waste my breath, clearly, you are just here to put people down and it's not working, lol. Have a great day friend.


 

Surf16

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I feel too many people are soft today.

We accept failure almost as equally as a success.

They try to make all the kids feel like winners and have no one feel the grief of loss.

If you never taste defeat, how can you truly taste victory?

I just wonder why we are accepting stuff like this and allowing people to say it's ok to be crap and mediocre.
Couldn't agree more!
2nd place is the first loser.

I've always been super competitive. You show me somebody who doesn't mind losing and I'll show you a loser.

I've lost in life before and it SUCKS! I didn't blame anyone else. I tried harder, practiced longer, studying more, did whatever it took not to feel like that again.

Business, sports, checkers it doesn't matter I want to win.

Society these days is too worried about hurting everybody's feelings. The "at least you tried" mentally is what is creating all these soft, whining people who expect fee handouts.

They feel they deserve something just for showing up.

Ok, I'm done ranting. Great post @Patrick Hughes
 

Mattie

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Why is it this way?
My theory is Social Media is entertainment. Children can entertain you. The curiosity, the playing like a child, and the weirdness beyond measure. The mystery, the freak show, and is it really different than the olden vintage days of finding the most deformed women, man, or child and putting them on display at the circus. You also have those that will do anything for attention. People love being entertained more than establishing responsibility. They enjoy wasting time. Escaping life. Social Media gives everyone the equal opportunity to be famous for 15 minutes until someone changes the platform and it dies.
 

ShadyDave

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Dec 5, 2017
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I think it has to do with people not caring about winning anymore. It only feels a little good or a little bad when they win or lose when they don't really try in the first place. Most people's "hard work" that they put into something is almost never their best, but just what they tell themselves to feel like they either deserved to win. Others lose and brag about how it never mattered to them in the first place. I think social media ruins peoples competitive drive too. It is to easy to compare oneself to not only to the people around you, but nowadays the comparison is to everyone. To be competitive one almost has to isolate competition.


As for why mumble rap is popular and bad movies get good reviews is a totally different thing. Mumble rap is a cultural and preferential thing. It is also easy for people to get into giving it an automatic high supply, and allows people to be part of something. Both the movies and the rap are in luck with how people interact today too. People are so desperate to try and fill the void for themselves that they will convince themselves the like something based on others liking it. There is also a lot of corporate and political bias.
 

shubham525

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Well , its not quite same in developing countries like India.
Competition is still at it's peak.

Limited college seats and everyone pushes towards them like raging bull.
Even 95% aren't enough.
 

djcoax

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Most people are "losers" (we can't all be winners) so they follow people they can relate to. The youtube channels I follow about value/growth investing, trading has very few followers, yet there are so many silly youtube channels with millions of people following them, I am often amazed, I guess not many people are looking to make more money or improve their lives, but they just like to moan when they don't have enough, then go back to following people that are losers to make them feel better.
Yes. This drives me nuts.

I have a website where I provide reading lists for people getting them to read more. I get perhaps 5 views per day on my website. On the other hand someone opening Kinder surprise eggs on Youtube hits 100M views.

Does that make me a loser ? Perhaps, but I don't see it that way.

--

On the other hand I don't agree with OP. To start with - what is success ? What is winning ?
Wanting to come in front of someone else is not a good trait when it's with the connotation you want others to fail or you want to feel better about yourself.

Wanting to push yourself to your limits and maximize your potential that is something else.
 

Shashwat

New Contributor
Dec 28, 2018
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I feel too many people are soft today.

We accept failure almost as equally as a success.

They try to make all the kids feel like winners and have no one feel the grief of loss.

If you never taste defeat, how can you truly taste victory?

I just wonder why we are accepting stuff like this and allowing people to say it's ok to be crap and mediocre.

The way kids all get trophies. The way garbage musicians are even called musicians?

Movies that just suck winning awards.

Mumble rap?

I'm confused.

The highest paid YouTuber last year was a 7-year-old reviewing toys. (Love this kid though, he is a legend. Little jealous.)

Everything seems backward.

It's almost as if the dumber I act and more drama I acquire in my life, I get treated like a winner.

Maybe I'm just being cynical today but I just constantly see stupidity surround me and it is glorified.

Maybe I'm the dumb one?

Why is it this way?


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I'm literally a 15 year old student so it's even more irritating for me. I was ridiculed for working hard towards acing the RMO (although I failed), people laughed at me as if I was the stupid one. I don't believe in keeping a superiority complex, but if you are 15 and don't have any goals except getting a bf or gf then you have no right to comment on me.

I'll tell you what, earlier the media was controlled by the winners and winners encourage others to win. Now there is a shift. People had always been like this. Just remember your school days and remember how the nerd was bullied. I am lucky to have many friends, or I would have suffered the same fate. Things will only go worse. Losers would push for 'acceptance' without working hard for it.

The shift in media from appeasing the winners to appeasing the average is what makes you feel this way. You have nothing to lose, just remember that if you work hard and smart and try to be a winner, you probably eventually will be one.
 

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