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I believe in magic, and why you should too.

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It’s not magic. It’s tinkering, experimenting, becoming a better leader, better inventor, better negotiator, accountant, lawyer, marketer, janitor, salesman and so on. That’s the big secret that eventually looks like magic. As you get better, so will the opportunities that come your way. And they come more often too.
Thus is process born, I believe.
Thus is patience needed.
Therefore, my questions:

Is it bad to be on a hurry? It seems paradoxical because hurrying seems incompatible with patience.
Is it bad to be worried?

I have printed books. My first aim was to test it with my students. And then get it out to the public knowing well what they are capable of doing from first hand experience. I guess am also scared.

Am I delaying scaling for no good reason?
What principles govern scaling? Are there things to consider before scaling? Or should I just get out there and approach other schools?
How are you improving your odds of success to the point where luck isn’t even a factor but it looks like magic to the world?
Consistent, persistent, enduring action. Patience again. I may want to marry miss Patience.
”Magic” also happens after thinking ahead, far and far ahead!
How does one separate this from the overthinking syndrome?

Remember: by doing something you get to know you can. Invent your way to success by tinkering and experimenting. It's in our DNA as humans to do that.
Continuous and never ending improvement. CAN I principle.
 
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According to Arthur C. Clarke's third law, any technology that is sufficiently advanced is indistinguishable from magic.

Lately I’ve been more active on the PM side than the general forum. Questions kept coming from members and I am so humbled to receive them. Why me?

At the same time, I wish they were public questions. Why? Because then they become useful to those who are even more hesitant to reach out for help but probably need it more than you.

With that in mind, I want to share that I believe in magic, and so should you!

Business is just an advanced form of “technology” and for those starting out, looking at those who’ve been there may look just like magic.

- When did you start your business? Oh wow.
- I am so confused, I don’t know what to do! What book should I read?
- What is the most important mindset to succeed in business?
- Getting a job, will I get sucked in forever? What should be my attitude? Work hard or just enough to keep the job?
- I want so many things! How do I choose? Do I try do to them all? Just David Goggins it or how else can I choose?

The list goes on… the pattern, however is all the same.

“What should I do? And I want to know what you know.“

As if what I did so far was a form of magic. Well, if it was, then I truly believe in it. I believe in this magic and so should you.

How did this magic work for me so far?
Well… it started exactly 20 years ago, when I started my first company out of my dorm. We took it public and I hit Forbes 500 list as a young prodigy. I didn’t buy a Lambo, I bought 10, same colour. My fame got me a supermodel girl and all of her friends on our yacht with a helipad, where we partied non-stop. We flew our private jet from Miami to Sydney and back to celebrate New Years 2x in one year. Why? Because we could. Life has been a dream since. I’ve won boxing and MMA events, surfed with the dolphins and wrestled grizzly bears. In short, it’s been “MAGICAL”… and also totally a lie.

Truth is I failed my first attempt at business, and second … and you guessed it my 5th too. I was broke and had very shitty jobs. I was abused by my “managers” and all the while I was getting my degree(s).

The problem was (and is for anyone new and just starting) that I didn’t know enough. I needed to consume more content, read more books. If I had done that sooner, I’d have the “rules” to that “magic” of business. So you see, when I finally read 52 books a year, meditated 40 min/day, journaled, worked out 2 hours/day I finally built my first successful business, make 9 figures a year, got that jet plane and … once agin, thats also a lie.

Truth is, I did at one time do all of those things, like read 52 books in a year. Another time I did meditate 2x day 20 min each. I did all of those “life improvement hacks” just not all at the same time. I needed to re-wire my brain and thinking patterns because what I was doing… it wasn’t working.

You can achieve everything you want in life, just not all at the exact same time.

So you see, the real problem was that I didn’t have clear enough goals. Once I’ve set my goals, I never let up and like magic, my first successful business yielded 8 figure profit in year 1.

Nope. Lie again. Goals are indeed extremely important, are key to success but just having goals doesn’t guarantee success in business. In fact, my first business that is a success today started out as one my most spectacular failures. We almost went bankrupt and I was bankrolling it with my salary income. A story for another time…

Truth is - there is no magic. Truth is that after my own experiences, when I read Unscripted by @MJ DeMarco book, I saw in it what many people who are just starting out won’t see. It is there, but we don’t see the world as it is, we see it as we are. This means that having been through enough “fail…“ correction… experiences, I could relate on a deeper level. It wasn’t something theoretical, it felt like “ahh… shit, this is where I screw up that business and oh that is how I screwed up that business“.

The sooner you get going on this path, the sooner you’ll have the opportunity to learn what you need to become who you need to become to succeed.

You see, I am not a genius. I wasn’t born with a gift of natural gift of entrepreneurship. But one thing I did right that’s paying me dividends to this day… I inherited money. Just kidding… no I didn’t. The thing I did right was to focus on incremental improvements. Always getting better, just as little or as much as possible in any given day/week/month/year.

Do that and you’ll find your way in entrepreneurial journey too.

It’s not magic. It’s tinkering, experimenting, becoming a better leader, better inventor, better negotiator, accountant, lawyer, marketer, janitor, salesman and so on. That’s the big secret that eventually looks like magic. As you get better, so will the opportunities that come your way. And they come more often too.

Some of you will find this frustrating to read and blame me for not proving the exact steps to success. If you are one of those readers, you’ve missed the point entirely and I cannot help you.




It is getting late here, and I was inspired to write this post by looking out my window and seeing beautiful clouds pushed by gentle winds before sunset. How often do you look up into the sky? How often do you pause to just think, ponder things? How often are you inspired?
You inspired me. Thank you.
 

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The Astonishing Secret of Letting Go​

**What would happen if we accepted the world as it is, not as we want it to be? **

I remember being beat up at at school as a kid and thinking… no… wishing I had an older brother. Kids who had older brothers had it easier, who would mess with them, right? It was harder to be me! So I took martial arts, and later became a boxer. Still, I thought having an older brother would have been a better path and wished my life as a kid was easier.

Random thoughts like that cross my mind all the time. Only when we pause, reflect and think, then we can see the lessons in there. Years later, I was quite good at fighting, not many would mess with me. And walking down the street near our apartment building I saw my neighbour… a skinny little guy who seemed sheepish all the time but intelligent. He looked afraid and in some argument with three bigger guys, he was in trouble. I walked up to “even the odds” and immediately one guy walked away. I was told to go home, it wasn’t my business… and honestly it was tempting, as these guys were bigger than me. But knowing there are only two left, I thought we’d be fine, but…

Posturing small chat turned into nothing, yet we couldn’t leave. I didn’t know why until I saw a group of other guys approaching. Now I had no chance and they walked my skinny neighbour by the armpits into an alley. I was told once again to go home. What on earth possessed me to step up one more time after that? I’ll never know, but I guess I was “committed to the moment”. I came around the corner to the alley and saw a few gut punches to my skinny pal, I walked up to the “two guard dogs” guys and took one out on the first punch. Then I had my a$$ handed to me. I can’t remember if there were 5 or 6 of them, but let’s just say it wasn’t a fight, it was a beating. To add insult to injury, these were part of some small gang and now wanted both of us to pay them weekly to avoid future beatings… yeah… it sucked (?)…

Now why am I sharing this on a business forum? What relevance does it have to anything other than a story?

**Most people, most of the time… wish things were different than they are. **

We want to start running to get in shape, and it rains the first day of training, we wish it didn’t rain. We want to start a business but life gets in the way… we wish we had rich parents, we wish we didn’t have bills to pay! Or we wish to have parents, or partners, or friends support us when they don’t. We wish a million other things and have reasons… in short, we wish it was different.

What if we just let it go and at least tried to see the world as it is, and not as we want it to be?

I got a beating trying to help a guy. Same people then wanted me to pay them money to prevent other beatings! Don’t I wish it was different? Back then I did. Today I do not. After that and similar other experiences, I learned how to deal with hard situations. I didn’t want to but I had to …

**Lesson: whatever happens, happens for a reason and will serve me. **

Knowing that even the scariest moments will pass and there is a solution to just about every problem gives me confidence. Better yet, I had to and learned to deal with difficult people while kids who did have older brothers were playing video games. Fast forward to my first few boardroom meetings and I was always the “fearless kid”, a young person who can go a round or two with the whatever biggest boss everyone else is quite literally afraid of. Most people can’t speak up, it served me. One of the greatest entrepreneurs I’ve ever met had me work for him directly, even though I was quite junior.

Today when I meet with most powerful politicians, business leaders, billionaires - it is my upbringing that allows me to shine in those meetings. My past “problems” serve me! Who knew?

  • When it rains, training is better because you dial in your clothes choices before the race (same with heat!)
  • When you have no money, you learn your downside isn’t as bad as someone who was born with a silver spoon.
  • When you failed at class, business, relationship, fitness - there are powerful lessons in there only available to those who actually tried!
whatever happens, happens for a reason and will serve me. Let it go. … accept a bit of magic ;) when you do

What about you? What do you wish were different today but know deep down it’s something that’ll serve you in the future?
 
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The Astonishing Secret of Letting Go (2nd instalment)…​

Is attachment to an outcome acting like a boat anchor for your success? …​

Readers of my posts will know that I believe in planning and goal setting. Those are a must IMO.

But the future is un-knowable. Your goals are only as good as what you already know. What do I mean? If you are dreaming of owning a Lambo, you are doing it because you saw the car and have an imagine in your eyes. If you want that “financial freedom”, you imagine the life, perhaps something similar to what MJ describes in his books. All of what you are thinking is something you can imagine because you’ve seen it before, somewhere. But … and that’s a biggie - you don’t know if what you can accomplish is beyond your dreams. What if you became the best in the world in something? What if you helped a billion people? What if you invented things that give you the type of joy knowing you are 1 of 1 in the world, that any kind of “Lambo” is but a nothing comparatively speaking?

Let go of the attachment to outcome, be flexible. What do I mean by that? I mean plan first, then execute and while doing so let of the attachment to outcome. Pay attention to what the world tells you, some call it “listen to the market” or “listen to your gut”.

The astonishing secret of letting go is that you are now open to feedback. Feedback helps us calibrate and do better. That’s the process. @Kak tried to launch a billion valuation company in his 20s. It failed but the lessons he learned are what made his advice here that much more valuable. The person he became was 10x or 100x of what he used to be in spite of the outcome. Let go of that attachment to outcome, the process is what matters.

Be like water. Accept that maybe you don’t even know what you really want but the direction of your efforts is good. You designed a product and tested it and it showed promise but then suddenly there is no success, it’s stalled. Market tells you you should pivot, but you are too committed, how do you know if you should quit or continue?

That’s the power of letting go of that attachment. If the process is serving you, you continue. If it’s not, you stop. Listen to your inner voice, that gut feeling - are you moving in the right direction? 9/10 times YOU KNOW the answer (its often painfully obvious), it comes from that inner place.

Other examples:

  • Fitness. When I trained for London Marathon, I knew the odds of being selected were 1/3. Not great. It’s a popular event and I didn’t have a way to pre-qualify to secure a spot. Lotto type “in” was the only way for me. I’ve put in 5/7 days of running, long and short - all not knowing if I’d even participate. It didn’t matter, training was the right thing to do. And I didn’t get in. I was crushed, so what? I was still a guy who could run a marathon at a moment’s notice.

  • Business. Some people are afraid to quit their jobs (geez… I was one of those people!). Why? Because we are attached to the outcome! We want that safety of knowing that we’ll succeed in our new business. Yet there is no such guarantee. And most of us are filled with doubt, fear and likely huge ambition pushing us forward. Let it go. Why? Because it doesn’t matter if you succeed, as long as you push forward you’ll become a better version of you and your ex-employer will want to pay you more to get you back. Trust me, anyone who’s started a business and learned on their own skin what its like, that person is far more valuable than a tie sporting, corporate career climber. Once you let go of the attachment to the outcome and accept that your worst case is acceptable, you’ll be shocked what you can achieve.

Why am I hammering on this so much? Does it even matter? Because I find that success is usually just on the periphery of our vision. And if we are doing 100mph down a tunnel, you can’t see that periphery. You can’t monetize the opportunities that are literally within reach. To do that one must learn to let go. To calm our minds and become open to inputs from the world around us. To see through a muddy glass of water (our future), you must first set the glass down and let the mud settle. That’s what happens to our brain when we let go of the attachment to outcome. We see things others miss.
 
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The Astonishing Secret of Letting Go (2nd instalment)…​

Is attachment to an outcome acting like a boat anchor for your success? …​

Readers of my posts will know that I believe in planning and goal setting. Those are a must IMO.

But the future is un-knowable. Your goals are only as good as what you already know. What do I mean? If you are dreaming of owning a Lambo, you are doing it because you saw the car and have an imagine in your eyes. If you want that “financial freedom”, you imagine the life, perhaps something similar to what MJ describes in his books. All of what you are thinking is something you can imagine because you’ve seen it before, somewhere. But … and that’s a biggie - you don’t know if what you can accomplish is beyond your dreams. What if you became the best in the world in something? What if you helped a billion people? What if you invented things that give you the type of joy knowing you are 1 of 1 in the world, that any kind of “Lambo” is but a nothing comparatively speaking?

Let go of the attachment to outcome, be flexible. What do I mean by that? I mean plan first, then execute and while doing so let of the attachment to outcome. Pay attention to what the world tells you, some call it “listen to the market” or “listen to your gut”.

The astonishing secret of letting go is that you are now open to feedback. Feedback helps us calibrate and do better. That’s the process. @Kak tried to launch a billion valuation company in his 20s. It failed but the lessons he learned are what made his advice here that much more valuable. The person he became was 10x or 100x of what he used to be in spite of the outcome. Let go of that attachment to outcome, the process is what matters.

Be like water. Accept that maybe you don’t even know what you really want but the direction of your efforts is good. You designed a product and tested it and it showed promise but then suddenly there is no success, it’s stalled. Market tells you you should pivot, but you are too committed, how do you know if you should quit or continue?

That’s the power of letting go of that attachment. If the process is serving you, you continue. If it’s not, you stop. Listen to your inner voice, that gut feeling - are you moving in the right direction? 9/10 times YOU KNOW the answer (its often painfully obvious), it comes from that inner place.

Other examples:

  • Fitness. When I trained for London Marathon, I knew the odds of being selected were 1/3. Not great. It’s a popular event and I didn’t have a way to pre-qualify to secure a spot. Lotto type “in” was the only way for me. I’ve put in 5/7 days of running, long and short - all not knowing if I’d even participate. It didn’t matter, training was the right thing to do. And I didn’t get in. I was crushed, so what? I was still a guy who could run a marathon at a moment’s notice.

  • Business. Some people are afraid to quit their jobs (geez… I was one of those people!). Why? Because we are attached to the outcome! We want that safety of knowing that we’ll succeed in our new business. Yet there is no such guarantee. And most of us are filled with doubt, fear and likely huge ambition pushing us forward. Let it go. Why? Because it doesn’t matter if you succeed, as long as you push forward you’ll become a better version of you and your ex-employer will want to pay you more to get you back. Trust me, anyone who’s started a business and learned on their own skin what its like, that person is far more valuable than a tie sporting, corporate career climber. Once you let go of the attachment to the outcome and accept that your worst case is acceptable, you’ll be shocked what you can achieve.

Why am I hammering on this so much? Does it even matter? Because I find that success is usually just on the periphery of our vision. And if we are doing 100mph down a tunnel, you can’t see that periphery. You can’t monetize the opportunities that are literally within reach. To do that one must learn to let go. To calm our minds and become open to inputs from the world around us. To see through a muddy glass of water (our future), you must first set the glass down and let the mud settle. That’s what happens to our brain when we let go of the attachment to outcome. We see things others miss.
This is so true and my example is so perfect.

I was pretty bitter about how that turned out for a while. My confidence was shaken. You could even say I dealt with some depression and anxiety as a result.

After a while of rough introspection on this, I realized how my best knowledge, wisdom and experience came from that venture. The best of who I am came from taking that swing. It didn’t matter that it didn’t work out, it built me, in a very large part, into who I am today. Which is someone even more qualified to take a swing like that again, not less.

Today, I am beyond thankful for that experience. I’ll never be the same… Because I tried.

Thank you for your post @Antifragile
 
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WJK

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The Astonishing Secret of Letting Go​

**What would happen if we accepted the world as it is, not as we want it to be? **

I remember being beat up at at school as a kid and thinking… no… wishing I had an older brother. Kids who had older brothers had it easier, who would mess with them, right? It was harder to be me! So I took martial arts, and later became a boxer. Still, I thought having an older brother would have been a better path and wished my life as a kid was easier.

Random thoughts like that cross my mind all the time. Only when we pause, reflect and think, then we can see the lessons in there. Years later, I was quite good at fighting, not many would mess with me. And walking down the street near our apartment building I saw my neighbour… a skinny little guy who seemed sheepish all the time but intelligent. He looked afraid and in some argument with three bigger guys, he was in trouble. I walked up to “even the odds” and immediately one guy walked away. I was told to go home, it wasn’t my business… and honestly it was tempting, as these guys were bigger than me. But knowing there are only two left, I thought we’d be fine, but…

Posturing small chat turned into nothing, yet we couldn’t leave. I didn’t know why until I saw a group of other guys approaching. Now I had no chance and they walked my skinny neighbour by the armpits into an alley. I was told once again to go home. What on earth possessed me to step up one more time after that? I’ll never know, but I guess I was “committed to the moment”. I came around the corner to the alley and saw a few gut punches to my skinny pal, I walked up to the “two guard dogs” guys and took one out on the first punch. Then I had my a$$ handed to me. I can’t remember if there were 5 or 6 of them, but let’s just say it wasn’t a fight, it was a beating. To add insult to injury, these were part of some small gang and now wanted both of us to pay them weekly to avoid future beatings… yeah… it sucked (?)…

Now why am I sharing this on a business forum? What relevance does it have to anything other than a story?

**Most people, most of the time… wish things were different than they are. **

We want to start running to get in shape, and it rains the first day of training, we wish it didn’t rain. We want to start a business but life gets in the way… we wish we had rich parents, we wish we didn’t have bills to pay! Or we wish to have parents, or partners, or friends support us when they don’t. We wish a million other things and have reasons… in short, we wish it was different.

What if we just let it go and at least tried to see the world as it is, and not as we want it to be?

I got a beating trying to help a guy. Same people then wanted me to pay them money to prevent other beatings! Don’t I wish it was different? Back then I did. Today I do not. After that and similar other experiences, I learned how to deal with hard situations. I didn’t want to but I had to …

**Lesson: whatever happens, happens for a reason and will serve me. **

Knowing that even the scariest moments will pass and there is a solution to just about every problem gives me confidence. Better yet, I had to and learned to deal with difficult people while kids who did have older brothers were playing video games. Fast forward to my first few boardroom meetings and I was always the “fearless kid”, a young person who can go a round or two with the whatever biggest boss everyone else is quite literally afraid of. Most people can’t speak up, it served me. One of the greatest entrepreneurs I’ve ever met had me work for him directly, even though I was quite junior.

Today when I meet with most powerful politicians, business leaders, billionaires - it is my upbringing that allows me to shine in those meetings. My past “problems” serve me! Who knew?

  • When it rains, training is better because you dial in your clothes choices before the race (same with heat!)
  • When you have no money, you learn your downside isn’t as bad as someone who was born with a silver spoon.
  • When you failed at class, business, relationship, fitness - there are powerful lessons there only available to those who actually tried!
whatever happens, happens for a reason and will serve me. Let it go. … accept a bit of magic ;) when you do

What about you? What do you wish were different today but know deep down it’s something that’ll serve you in the future?
I had a very rough beginning. Like you, it's taught me to step up front and center, do what I know is right, tell the truth the way I see it, and take my licks. Most of the time they don't come. People are really impressed with courage and conviction. Those qualities put you into a different club and they propel you to the front line. The truth rings true with most people.

Also, I have learned that the guys who yell the loudest and try to act tough are scared, no -- terrified, of the world. They are usually the paper tigers. The guys I watch out for are the quiet, humble guys. If they softly say they're going to do something, I know I'd better move over and plan on it. They really mean it.

I too believe in letting go of the victim role. Yes, things could have been different for me. But I would NOT be the person I am today without those challenges. My past has given me strength, character, and convictions. I have no major regrets.
 

Antifragile

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The power of habit​

The Astonishing Secret of Letting Go (3, the final chapter)…​


I decided I'd be in Real Estate. I applied for jobs and this one position was perfect. Looking at the job description, I was 10/10 fit. I knew everything and had experienced to back it up, I was supposed to be a shoe in. And trust me, I wanted to get a job, it was part of my plan. Foot in the door, learn the ins and outs and get connections. I applied, went through 4 interviews... I had it!

Until... I didn't. Someone less qualified than me got the job. While back then I didn't know The Astonishing Secret of Letting Go... I was crushed. But life is like that, had I known that literally a month later I'd apply for a 2x better job out of anger for not getting any of the other positions. Why anger? Because I wasn't least bit qualified! I knew I wanted the job but I didn't yet know how to do it. Had I known that I'd get it, I wouldn't fret.

Best of all? The job I did get got me to working directly with one of the most impressive entrepreneurs I've ever met - to this day!

Hope you get that by "Let it go" I don't mean to be like a leaf in the wind! What I mean is still hard work towards your goals. Just accept that the world isn't the way you want it to be, it's just the way it is. And that whatever happens happens for a reason.


----

Hopefully I’ve convinced you on the “why” behind “letting go”. This post is about the “how?!”

The simple answer is ...
IMG_9912.jpeg

But let's be honest, it is not that simple, is it?

The Voice in our heads


Have you ever had a conversation with yourself? You know that little voice in your head that won’t shut up? Of course you have. You are probably hearing it now reading this post and it's telling you things. We all have that voice.

The way I imagine it: we are sitting on a giant elephant. Our habits are what we already trained that elephant to do. It feels effortless, we are just sitting there … riding it without thought or effort.

Those habits can be good or bad. When you want to change the bad habits, you need to control that elephant. And to a degree you can. The limit is set at how much energy it takes. It takes willpower. And that is just like a muscle, the more push ups you do, the more tired you’ll be. And soon, you won’t be able to do any. That’s how controlling that other “you”, the elephant you are sitting on, that voice that argues with you… is hard. And most people then give into pushing the “easy button”, relaxing and letting the elephant take you on whatever ride is habitual.

An experiment: Try sitting and doing nothing in silence for 20 minutes. If you find it almost impossible, your elephant is in charge, not you.

Recently @MitchC made a post saying that teenagers don’t need to grind 27/7 and should enjoy being teenagers. I like this, it’s true. And while doing that, I think working on your habits is key. Meaning, as a teen you don’t need to grind on business, but you should still become a better version of yourself. This is the time when you are training that elephant you are sitting on. And if you train it to waste 7 hours per day playing video games and the rest of the time getting high… you’ll have hell of a bad time in the future.

Discipline = Freedom


But imagine the opposite, where you've trained your elephant to behave in the way you envision your best self would behave. You've used discipline since teen years into your adulthood and saw the benefits. You are healthy, centred, confident, likeable and capable. You can take on any challenge and so you go on to try business. Your disciplined approach makes your elephant go in the direction you've chosen and suddenly you become that "overnight success". You have your freedom.

Freedom from worry, because you know what you are capable of doing. Likely financial freedom too. And most importantly, time freedom. Because you've invested in yourself for years, you've become a better you. You can now do more faster and better. You can achieve things others take 3x longer... You can have a life and a business.

The How of Astonishing Secret of Letting Go...​


Is to keep working on yourself, the process is what matters. Marginal gains yield major rewards !

When you try a business and the world starts telling you to pivot, you have the inner strength to listen. To Let Go.

These days the way I handle it is to go with life not against it. The world is funny that way, it gives you what you need when you need it but you must pay attention. And to pay attention you must be conditioned to pay attention. I personally use TM (Transcendental Meditation®) to keep myself centred. It's like an energy source for the willpower to do hard things and the wisdom to do the right things.

Example: @Aidan04 shared an incredible journey in his thread "Am I in The Desert?" where @BizyDad highlighted that listening to the market is a must. Letting go of that attachment to outcome is how you open your mind to what the market is telling you, @Aidan04 !

That's it folks. Hope you enjoyed the 3 part series. :) Have a nice day.
 
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Aidan04

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The power of habit​

The Astonishing Secret of Letting Go (3, the final chapter)…​


I decided I'd be in Real Estate. I applied for jobs and this one position was perfect. Looking at the job description, I was 10/10 fit. I knew everything and had experienced to back it up, I was supposed to be a shoe in. And trust me, I wanted to get a job, it was part of my plan. Foot in the door, learn the ins and outs and get connections. I applied, went through 4 interviews... I had it!

Until... I didn't. Someone less qualified than me got the job. While back then I didn't know The Astonishing Secret of Letting Go... I was crushed. But life is like that, had I known that literally a month later I'd apply for a 2x better job out of anger for not getting any of the other positions. Why anger? Because I wasn't least bit qualified! I knew I wanted the job but I didn't yet know how to do it. Had I known that I'd get it, I wouldn't fret.

Best of all? The job I did get got me to working directly with one of the most impressive entrepreneurs I've ever met - to this day!

Hope you get that by "Let it go" I don't mean to be like a leaf in the wind! What I mean is still hard work towards your goals. Just accept that the world isn't the way you want it to be, it's just the way it is. And that whatever happens happens for a reason.


----

Hopefully I’ve convinced you on the “why” behind “letting go”. This post is about the “how?!”

The simple answer is ...
View attachment 50499

But let's be honest, it is not that simple, is it?

The Voice in our heads


Have you ever had a conversation with yourself? You know that little voice in your head that won’t shut up? Of course you have. You are probably hearing it now reading this post and it's telling you things. We all have that voice.

The way I imagine it: we are sitting on a giant elephant. Our habits are what we already trained that elephant to do. It feels effortless, we are just sitting there … riding it without thought or effort.

Those habits can be good or bad. When you want to change the bad habits, you need to control that elephant. And to a degree you can. The limit is set at how much energy it takes. It takes willpower. And that is just like a muscle, the more push ups you do, the more tired you’ll be. And soon, you won’t be able to do any. That’s how controlling that other “you”, the elephant you are sitting on, that voice that argues with you… is hard. And most people then give into pushing the “easy button”, relaxing and letting the elephant take you on whatever ride is habitual.

An experiment: Try sitting and doing nothing in silence for 20 minutes. If you find it almost impossible, your elephant is in charge, not you.

Recently @MitchC made a post saying that teenagers don’t need to grind 27/7 and should enjoy being teenagers. I like this, it’s true. And while doing that, I think working on your habits is key. Meaning, as a teen you don’t need to grind on business, but you should still become a better version of yourself. This is the time when you are training that elephant you are sitting on. And if you train it to waste 7 hours per day playing video games and the rest of the time getting high… you’ll have hell of a bad time in the future.

Discipline = Freedom


But imagine the opposite, where you've trained your elephant to behave in the way you envision your best self would behave. You've used discipline since teen years into your adulthood and saw the benefits. You are healthy, centred, confident, likeable and capable. You can take on any challenge and so you go on to try business. Your disciplined approach makes your elephant go in the direction you've chosen and suddenly you become that "overnight success". You have your freedom.

Freedom from worry, because you know what you are capable of doing. Likely financial freedom too. And most importantly, time freedom. Because you've invested in yourself for years, you've become a better you. You can now do more faster and better. You can achieve things others take 3x longer... You can have a life and a business.

The How of Astonishing Secret of Letting Go...​


Is to keep working on yourself, the process is what matters. Marginal gains yield major rewards !

When you try a business and the world starts telling you to pivot, you have the inner strength to listen. To Let Go.

These days the way I handle it is to go with life not against it. The world is funny that way, it gives you what you need when you need it but you must pay attention. And to pay attention you must be conditioned to pay attention. I personally use TM (Transcendental Meditation®) to keep myself centred. It's like an energy source for the willpower to do hard things and the wisdom to do the right things.

Example: @Aidan04 shared an incredible journey in his thread "Am I in The Desert?" where @BizyDad highlighted that listening to the market is a must. Letting go of that attachment to outcome is how you open your mind to what the market is telling you, @Aidan04 !

That's it folks. Hope you enjoyed the 3 part series. :) Have a nice day.
Learning to accept that you're wrong is a brutal but liberating experience. I was personally lost in the delusion that I was correct and that what I was doing would give me success, freedom, and acknowledgment but it's not that simple.

As Tyler Durden said, you need to just let go. There are a few analogies I could equate to this, and my favorite is sand.

Pick up a fistful of sand. Make your hand loose, then clench your hand tight. See how in both cases the sand falls out?

Everything you said here is correct. You can't force success, but progress over time with a calm and open mind will eventually lead you down the path of glory.

We all lose our way sometimes, and that's okay. Learning from that experience and getting back up after is what makes you strong and resilient.

Be like water, my friend.
 

WJK

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I thought about this thread over the weekend... you getting beat up by the pack of boys. When I was 19 and I moved to downtown Los Angeles, I had a similar beat down, although it wasn't physical. I went to a private fashion/business college with a bunch of privileged girls. I was a poor country girl and I was the only student who was married. (Where I came from, we all got married right out of high school.) Yes, the other students gave me a hard time and none of them became my friends. I connected with the teachers and school staff. I got a fabulous education that I still use every day.

Back to the other girls and your important point... I was so green-eyed when I compared my situation to theirs. Their daddies paid for their apartment and gave them credit cards. One of them even quit her part-time job because it was ruining her tennis game. In contrast, I was working 32 hours per week and carrying 18 units with a 3.9 GPA. They took all kinds of trips and field trips that I could not afford -- while I stayed home and worked. I kept thinking about what I could have done with their resources. That was all while they made fun of me and tried to constantly bully me. In the beginning, I was their favorite target. They were always telling me that I needed to get a life. All I did was work and study. They taught me to fight back with some great one-liners.

Now, through the lens of time, I see that I was the privileged one there at that school. I had one of the front-row seats in those classrooms to soak up the education. The other girls got their "MRS. Degrees" by marrying the right man and they settled into their expected lives. I went on to have a wonderful career and become successful in RE. I met up with a couple of the other students when I was in my 40s. I gave them my business card. They told me how lucky I was to have a successful career while they prattled on about all their many problems. I just smiled and wished them well. Nothing had really changed for them while I was miles down the road in front of them. There was nothing to say or explain. I had won the game in ways that they couldn't even comprehend.

A version of this theme has happened over and over for me during the years. The bruises and bumps don't really matter and long I pick myself up and carry on. I guess I sound like I bragging. I'm not trying to come off that way. I just saying that there are a lot of ways to win the game, no matter what happens along the way. As this thread says, it is what it is.
 

wyattnorton

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According to Arthur C. Clarke's third law, any technology that is sufficiently advanced is indistinguishable from magic.

Lately I’ve been more active on the PM side than the general forum. Questions kept coming from members and I am so humbled to receive them. Why me?

At the same time, I wish they were public questions. Why? Because then they become useful to those who are even more hesitant to reach out for help but probably need it more than you.

With that in mind, I want to share that I believe in magic, and so should you!

Business is just an advanced form of “technology” and for those starting out, looking at those who’ve been there may look just like magic.

- When did you start your business? Oh wow.
- I am so confused, I don’t know what to do! What book should I read?
- What is the most important mindset to succeed in business?
- Getting a job, will I get sucked in forever? What should be my attitude? Work hard or just enough to keep the job?
- I want so many things! How do I choose? Do I try do to them all? Just David Goggins it or how else can I choose?

The list goes on… the pattern, however is all the same.

“What should I do? And I want to know what you know.“

As if what I did so far was a form of magic. Well, if it was, then I truly believe in it. I believe in this magic and so should you.

How did this magic work for me so far?
Well… it started exactly 20 years ago, when I started my first company out of my dorm. We took it public and I hit Forbes 500 list as a young prodigy. I didn’t buy a Lambo, I bought 10, same colour. My fame got me a supermodel girl and all of her friends on our yacht with a helipad, where we partied non-stop. We flew our private jet from Miami to Sydney and back to celebrate New Years 2x in one year. Why? Because we could. Life has been a dream since. I’ve won boxing and MMA events, surfed with the dolphins and wrestled grizzly bears. In short, it’s been “MAGICAL”… and also totally a lie.

Truth is I failed my first attempt at business, and second … and you guessed it my 5th too. I was broke and had very shitty jobs. I was abused by my “managers” and all the while I was getting my degree(s).

The problem was (and is for anyone new and just starting) that I didn’t know enough. I needed to consume more content, read more books. If I had done that sooner, I’d have the “rules” to that “magic” of business. So you see, when I finally read 52 books a year, meditated 40 min/day, journaled, worked out 2 hours/day I finally built my first successful business, make 9 figures a year, got that jet plane and … once agin, thats also a lie.

Truth is, I did at one time do all of those things, like read 52 books in a year. Another time I did meditate 2x day 20 min each. I did all of those “life improvement hacks” just not all at the same time. I needed to re-wire my brain and thinking patterns because what I was doing… it wasn’t working.

You can achieve everything you want in life, just not all at the exact same time.

So you see, the real problem was that I didn’t have clear enough goals. Once I’ve set my goals, I never let up and like magic, my first successful business yielded 8 figure profit in year 1.

Nope. Lie again. Goals are indeed extremely important, are key to success but just having goals doesn’t guarantee success in business. In fact, my first business that is a success today started out as one my most spectacular failures. We almost went bankrupt and I was bankrolling it with my salary income. A story for another time…

Truth is - there is no magic. Truth is that after my own experiences, when I read Unscripted by @MJ DeMarco book, I saw in it what many people who are just starting out won’t see. It is there, but we don’t see the world as it is, we see it as we are. This means that having been through enough “fail…“ correction… experiences, I could relate on a deeper level. It wasn’t something theoretical, it felt like “ahh… shit, this is where I screw up that business and oh that is how I screwed up that business“.

The sooner you get going on this path, the sooner you’ll have the opportunity to learn what you need to become who you need to become to succeed.

You see, I am not a genius. I wasn’t born with a gift of natural gift of entrepreneurship. But one thing I did right that’s paying me dividends to this day… I inherited money. Just kidding… no I didn’t. The thing I did right was to focus on incremental improvements. Always getting better, just as little or as much as possible in any given day/week/month/year.

Do that and you’ll find your way in entrepreneurial journey too.

It’s not magic. It’s tinkering, experimenting, becoming a better leader, better inventor, better negotiator, accountant, lawyer, marketer, janitor, salesman and so on. That’s the big secret that eventually looks like magic. As you get better, so will the opportunities that come your way. And they come more often too.

Some of you will find this frustrating to read and blame me for not proving the exact steps to success. If you are one of those readers, you’ve missed the point entirely and I cannot help you.




It is getting late here, and I was inspired to write this post by looking out my window and seeing beautiful clouds pushed by gentle winds before sunset. How often do you look up into the sky? How often do you pause to just think, ponder things? How often are you inspired?
Been a looooooong while since i posted on here.

Not sure why I clicked this post and only this one before heading off back into the great beyond...

But this was much needed just to read a story of past struggles for someone ahead of me while in the midst of the struggles.

I suppose you read what you need (want) to hear.

Thank you brother, we all appreciate posts like these in certain points in our lives.
 
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Jrjohnny

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The power of habit​

The Astonishing Secret of Letting Go (3, the final chapter)…​


I decided I'd be in Real Estate. I applied for jobs and this one position was perfect. Looking at the job description, I was 10/10 fit. I knew everything and had experienced to back it up, I was supposed to be a shoe in. And trust me, I wanted to get a job, it was part of my plan. Foot in the door, learn the ins and outs and get connections. I applied, went through 4 interviews... I had it!

Until... I didn't. Someone less qualified than me got the job. While back then I didn't know The Astonishing Secret of Letting Go... I was crushed. But life is like that, had I known that literally a month later I'd apply for a 2x better job out of anger for not getting any of the other positions. Why anger? Because I wasn't least bit qualified! I knew I wanted the job but I didn't yet know how to do it. Had I known that I'd get it, I wouldn't fret.

Best of all? The job I did get got me to working directly with one of the most impressive entrepreneurs I've ever met - to this day!

Hope you get that by "Let it go" I don't mean to be like a leaf in the wind! What I mean is still hard work towards your goals. Just accept that the world isn't the way you want it to be, it's just the way it is. And that whatever happens happens for a reason.


----

Hopefully I’ve convinced you on the “why” behind “letting go”. This post is about the “how?!”

The simple answer is ...
View attachment 50499

But let's be honest, it is not that simple, is it?
IMO:
I just told myself, some day isn’t guaranteed, I always told myself, treat it like it’s a bandaid.

That’s what always got me through those mental hurdles.
The Voice in our heads

Have you ever had a conversation with yourself? You know that little voice in your head that won’t shut up? Of course you have. You are probably hearing it now reading this post and it's telling you things. We all have that voice.

The way I imagine it: we are sitting on a giant elephant. Our habits are what we already trained that elephant to do. It feels effortless, we are just sitting there … riding it without thought or effort.

Those habits can be good or bad. When you want to change the bad habits, you need to control that elephant. And to a degree you can. The limit is set at how much energy it takes. It takes willpower. And that is just like a muscle, the more push ups you do, the more tired you’ll be. And soon, you won’t be able to do any. That’s how controlling that other “you”, the elephant you are sitting on, that voice that argues with you… is hard. And most people then give into pushing the “easy button”, relaxing and letting the elephant take you on whatever ride is habitual.

An experiment: Try sitting and doing nothing in silence for 20 minutes. If you find it almost impossible, your elephant is in charge, not you.
I’ve done this experiment, I quizzed myself, from February 1st to monthly updates.

February: 5 minutes
March: 7 minutes
April: 12 minutes
May: 15 minutes
June: 20 minutes
July: 25 minutes
August: Unknown, fell asleep. Lmao probably 30-35 minutes though.

Recently @MitchC made a post saying that teenagers don’t need to grind 27/7 and should enjoy being teenagers. I like this, it’s true. And while doing that, I think working on your habits is key. Meaning, as a teen you don’t need to grind on business, but you should still become a better version of yourself. This is the time when you are training that elephant you are sitting on. And if you train it to waste 7 hours per day playing video games and the rest of the time getting high… you’ll have hell of a bad time in the future.
Now I do this myself, I still go to bed at a reasonable time, (8-10) wake up around 6-7:30), I have received some heat for doing that though.

I don’t really know what you would consider business but I spend most of my time doing productive stuff.

My friends who I go to the gym with now still play video games and they keep asking me “what do you do with your life now?”

I told them I do business, working out, reading, meditating and healthy eating.

When I said business they laughed at me.

I told them I was serious and that we are getting ready to launch and they stared at me.

They didn’t believe in me, nor do they have to.

They dont know about the powers of letting go.

They still associate me with a skinny boy, insecure, who plays video games 9-13 hours a day.

They can’t let go of that fact, they still think their better than me.

It’s been messing with their gym performance.

We were doing bench press, we tried with one of those not really bars, the 20 lb ones, Ykifyk.

They could do it, but struggled.

I went to my 50 pounds to warm up and they were like “no way you could lift that” etc

I did it for like 10 reps, then they said.

“Load me up with 50 lb”

They struggled, one of them almost dropped it on their neck.

I humbled them, they now understand that I have improved.

And that you don’t get better from doing nothing, even just a little at a time still counts, im a good example.
 
Last edited:

heavy_industry

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Damn, reading this thread should require a gold-mining license.

Thanks for the follow up comments @Antifragile !
 

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