Help me Break the SCRIPT

[CPisHere]

I own a couple businesses but am still trapped in a SCRIPTED life. Help me escape!

My wife & I are young 30's and we have three kids under the age of 4.

6 years ago my wife & I opened a b&m retail store. A true tightwad could get pre-tax take home cash of $100k/year. But basically, we don't control spending because it's "re-investing in the business" even though growth flat-lined this year. We do basically no advertising right now, so I believe the store has the potential for another $150k/year in revenue where it would truly be maxed.

I'm a firm believer that the next step is creating our own products to sell in-store & online, but it's outside my wife's comfort zone as she feels overwhelmed with just running the store/our kids.

A year ago, I bought an existing (non-franchise) commercial cleaning company. The plan was for my wife to handle customer service/sales for 3 months until we felt comfortable with it then I would quit my job. A week after buying the business we found out she was pregnant (a big surprise) and she basically didn't have the energy to deal with my business. I planned to go until the end of the year & then quit. In November I lost my biggest account. Quiting got pushed back. The next plan was to wait until this July when some debt would be paid off and quit. I would clean the largest account myself to make enough money. In June I lost that account.

Seeing a trend? This wasn't purely bad luck. It was essentially self-sabotage. Giving a half a$$ effort to my business as I feel tired and trapped in my job. Plus I haven't added any accounts as I have "no time" for sales (in truth, I have 45 minutes/day yet don't use it).

So here we are. I know that every day I stay comfortable in this job and life it gets that much harder to make a change. I know that if I continue doing what I'm doing my soul will whither and die, and worse - my kids will end up the same way. THIS IS MY WHY.

But it's hard to see a way out. And that's where I need you, Fastlaners.

I can't reduce our expenses without drastically altering our life. Even then, I can't cut more than $2k/month in expenses (we don't live extravagantly, kids are expensive). And frankly, I'm not prepared to make that sacrifice YET.

 

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[GeeTee]

No one else is can tell you what to do - there's no easy way. Recently I was catching up with a friend and he said something that completely changed my paradigm. He said, "You have to take responsibility for what you want. You can't wait for someone else to hand it to you."

All this time I had been daydreaming of winning the lottery or starting a successful business, but I realised I was waiting for it to fall into my lap. You need to choose, and you need to be confident enough in yourself to live with the decision - if that means taking a leap of faith, you need to be confident in your ability to make it happen (or stupidly naïve to think you can, which I think is enough for most people).

Edit: I'm not saying to quit - you could get motivated and make this business fly while still keeping your job, but it's up to YOU to take responsibility for making that happen.

 

[CPisHere]

No one else is can tell you what to do - there's no easy way. Recently I was catching up with a friend and he said something that completely changed my paradigm. He said, "You have to take responsibility for what you want. You can't wait for someone else to hand it to you."

All this time I had been daydreaming of winning the lottery or starting a successful business, but I realised I was waiting for it to fall into my lap. You need to choose, and you need to be confident enough in yourself to live with the decision - if that means taking a leap of faith, you need to be confident in your ability to make it happen (or stupidly naïve to think you can, which I think is enough for most people).

Edit: I'm not saying to quit - you could get motivated and make this business fly while still keeping your job, but it's up to YOU to take responsibility for making that happen.

Thanks. You are, of course, right.

In April, I talked to a business coach who pointed out that I could quit and do the cleaning myself to make enough money. It blew my mind that I had never seriously considered this. I postponed a couple months and now that option is removed.

I guess I posted hoping for some enlightenment on options/paths.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

without drastically altering our life.

What you're basically saying here is you want to drastically alter your life, but you don't want to drastically alter your life ... kinda like saying you want the fitness body, but you don't want to change your diet. Change rarely happens from an area of comfort and convenience.

 

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[Get Right]

And frankly, I'm not prepared to make that sacrifice YET.

To move forward you almost always have to sacrifice....something.

I sacrifice: personal time with friends, vacations, regular paycheck, financial stability, nice car(s), relationships, taking the easy route on anything, wear and tear on the body....and I'm sure there will be much more.

I sacrifice these things because I believe there is "more" out there in the world. More freedom, more personal time, more financial benefits...

Now there is an equal argument to a life with handcuffs on. It's comfortable. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't miss it. I liked my fancy car, my steady paycheck, my raises, my never ending home improvements.

I personally chose to make the sacrifice. I chose it because my multiple FTM's were so painful I had to find another way.

My uneducated guess - your FTE or FTM isn't strong enough (or well defined enough)...yet.

 

[MarekvBeek]

To move forward you almost always have to sacrifice....something.

I sacrifice: personal time with friends, vacations, regular paycheck, financial stability, nice car(s), relationships, taking the easy route on anything, wear and tear on the body....and I'm sure there will be much more.

I sacrifice these things because I believe there is "more" out there in the world. More freedom, more personal time, more financial benefits...

Now there is an equal argument to a life with handcuffs on. It's comfortable. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't miss it. I liked my fancy car, my steady paycheck, my raises, my never ending home improvements.

I personally chose to make the sacrifice. I chose it because my multiple FTM's were so painful I had to find another way.

My uneducated guess - your FTE or FTM isn't strong enough (or well defined enough)...yet.

That's funny that you talk about sacrifice.

I always thought I had to sacrifice friendship, family and my soul.

But when I look at this right now, the biggest sacrifice I had to make was not my relationships and me, but my ego and the image of looking good.

On-topic: First of all. I love and respect the fact that you have three kids, a wife and yourself to feed, and still manage to work on multiple projects and got it all together.

When I read your OP, it looks like you value safety, security and maybe a little bit significance over growth and contribution, the two value's needed for explosive wealth growth. But don't take my words, check for yourself if it's true.

The main question seems to be here: can you really grow one business if you have multiple businesses and a job going on? Like your business coach pointed out in a sort of way.

We can't tell you what to do. You are the only person that can make the decisions for you. And I believe you can make the best decision for you and your family. Just decide.

 

[CPisHere]

What you're basically saying here is you want to drastically alter your life, but you don't want to drastically alter your life ... kinda like saying you want the fitness body, but you don't want to change your diet. Change rarely happens from an area of comfort and convenience.

Okay I know you are right, but help me see if I'm contextualizing it correctly.

To use your metaphor, I want the fitness body & I'm struggling to change my diet being surrounded by junk food. I could take drastic measures by moving into the wilderness to help ensure I eat healthy thus get the fitness body I want. Such drastic measures would get drastic results - and only when I'm want it bad enough to do this will I get what I want because my current environment (the comfort & convenience surrounding me) is preventing what I claim to want. Is that right?

What if I get expenses under control for the store/manage to get some new accounts for my cleaning business?

 

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[CPisHere]

When I read your OP, it looks like you value safety, security and maybe a little bit significance over growth and contribution, the two value's needed for explosive wealth growth. But don't take my words, check for yourself if it's true.

I theoretically value growth over everything. I believe "Comfort is death", and yet I agonize over my family facing the consequences. This mismatch of beliefs can't be good.

 

[garyjsmith]

..My uneducated guess - your FTE or FTM isn't strong enough (or well defined enough)...yet.

If this is the case, keep going; you'll eventually have that moment where you're no longer cautious of making the sacrifice and you'll be all in on getting out.

 

[MarekvBeek]

I theoretically value growth over everything. I believe "Comfort is death", and yet I agonize over my family facing the consequences. This mismatch of beliefs can't be good.

Yes, it is not that you're broken or just in the wrong place. Cause I believe that the problems we have are an opportunity to grow into something bigger.

Ultimately if you believe 'Comfort is Death' but being financial free means comfort to you, you will never get to that point. I don't say that's true for you. But if you're not were you want to be financially, spiritually or emotionally, somewhere on the line you have an inner conflict with your belief system.

Look at your actions, because they reflect your real beliefs.

I can see you're a smart man, so you should be able to figure it out for yourself.

 

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[CPisHere]

If this is the case, keep going; you'll eventually have that moment where you're no longer cautious of making the sacrifice and you'll be all in on getting out.

The problem is that my job is completely comfortable. It's not challenging. It's not miserable. It's just drudgery.

 

[CPisHere]

To move forward you almost always have to sacrifice....something.

I sacrifice: personal time with friends, vacations, regular paycheck, financial stability, nice car(s), relationships, taking the easy route on anything, wear and tear on the body....and I'm sure there will be much more.

I sacrifice these things because I believe there is "more" out there in the world. More freedom, more personal time, more financial benefits...

Now there is an equal argument to a life with handcuffs on. It's comfortable. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't miss it. I liked my fancy car, my steady paycheck, my raises, my never ending home improvements.

I personally chose to make the sacrifice. I chose it because my multiple FTM's were so painful I had to find another way.

My uneducated guess - your FTE or FTM isn't strong enough (or well defined enough)...yet.

I feel like I'm making plenty of sacrifices, but I guess I'm not willing to make the biggest one. Tell me more about your FTM's.

 

[TonyStark]

• Stop buying b&m businesses?

• Stop thinking that you need to spend money to make money.
• Start a business that adheres to the Fastlane commandments.

 

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[CPisHere]

• Stop buying b&m businesses?

• Stop thinking that you need to spend money to make money.
• Start a business that adheres to the Fastlane commandments.

Aren't you helpful.

 

[ZF Lee]

I feel like I'm making plenty of sacrifices, but I guess I'm not willing to make the biggest one. Tell me more about your FTM's.

*UNSCRIPTED* - Have you had your "FTE"? (Or Was it an FTM?!)

• Stop buying b&m businesses?

• Stop thinking that you need to spend money to make money.
• Start a business that adheres to the Fastlane commandments.

More exactly, MONOGAMY. Focus on one battlefront at a time. I understand the sap in energy, especially of your wife's. Credits to her for being a strong lady!

I am a student and I work part time, but even then the traction is not good enough. Although my life as a student has revealed lots of pain points to exploit, I cannot stay there forever for maximum execution.

I might say that the selling online venue is more conducive as there are tons of ways there to make money without spending money, or at least, much money. For B&M businesses it might take more creativity lol.

 

[TonyStark]

Aren't you helpful.

What kind of retail business did you start?

 

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[CPisHere]

What kind of retail business did you start?

A children's clothing/gift store.

 

[TonyStark]

A children's clothing/gift store.

I feel like a progress thread would be rejuvinating exercise to help get your business back on track.

Start with what you know and go from there:

• What are my metrics? (Sales, inventory, customers, literally everything)
• Do I have any debt?

Personally, I don't think you need to start another business until you figure out why your first one isn't where you want it to be.

Why not hire someone to do the e-commerce stuff?

And you don't need to cut back on expenses, you need to create MORE.

 

[CPisHere]

I feel like a progress thread would be rejuvinating exercise to help get your business back on track.

Start with what you know and go from there:

• What are my metrics? (Sales, inventory, customers, literally everything)
• Do I have any debt?

Personally, I don't think you need to start another business until you figure out why your first one isn't where you want it to be.

Why not hire someone to do the e-commerce stuff?

And you don't need to cut back on expenses, you need to create MORE.

Have you read Unscripted ? Because MJ specifically mentions how B&M businesses can be Fastlane and talks about the importance of cutting back on expenses too...

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

A children's clothing/gift store.

Doesn't sound very scalable nor something that would have plump margins.

mentions how B&M businesses can be Fastlane

I generally don't consider retail boutiques "Fastlane", even if you have a vision for scale thru channels or franchising. And with the crushing blow the internet has done to such establishments, it's only gonna get worse.

 

[TonyStark]

Have you read Unscripted ? Because MJ specifically mentions how B&M businesses can be Fastlane and talks about the importance of cutting back on expenses too...

Here's a thread where I posted an update on the store:
Need some advice: Make or Break it Year

I don't disagree with that, it just helps me when I know what kind of numbers I'm dealing with.

 

[SteveO]

Stop buying b&m businesses?

Why would you do that? Is internet the only way to go in your opinion?

 

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[CPisHere]

Doesn't sound very scalable nor something that would have plump margins.

I generally don't consider retail boutiques "Fastlane", even if you have a vision for scale thru channels or franchising. And with the crushing blow the internet has done to such establishments, it's only gonna get worse.

You are correct. Like I said originally, I strongly believe we have to create our own products that we sell online, which would be Fastlane.

 

[TonyStark]

Why would you do that? Is internet the only way to go in your opinion?

No

 

[SteveO]

It seems to me that you are scared. Fear will get you nothing! Some people feel that it provides motivation but I think it provides irrationality.

It also seems that you are doing what you want. There is no way that I could sit on a job with this in front of me. But you stated that the job is comfort. Comfort must be what you want. So..... you are doing what you want. You don't want the business to collapse yet you are not stepping up.

The comfort of the job and fear. Decisions you need to make.

 

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[SteveO]

No

Haha. I read your line as a statement but then saw the question mark. I also read your follow-up posts. I like many brick and mortar options but feel that many don't do them due to the startup costs.

 

[TonyStark]

Haha. I read your line as a statement but then saw the question mark. I also read your follow-up posts. I like many brick and mortar options but feel that many don't do them due to the startup costs.

I feel like many b&m's are disguised as jobs. But I know there's many out there with lots of potential.

 

[SteveO]

I feel like many b&m's are disguised as jobs. But I know there's many out there with lots of potential.

Open your mind and eyes!
How about a fertilizer distribution plant with dozens of trucks hauling non-stop?
How about a distribution center?
Successful restaurants?
Owning the real estate that any of those operate from?

Coca-Cola is brick and mortar.

The list is as unlimited as the on-line opportunities.

 

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[SteveO]

What is your store worth? Is there any opportunity to increase the value and sell it?

If you are going to sell online, why have you not done it yet? I really don't need the answer. The question is for you to think about. I know that you have touched on some reasons in your post but those are simply excuses.

 

[CPisHere]

It seems to me that you are scared. Fear will get you nothing! Some people feel that it provides motivation but I think it provides irrationality.

Wouldn't quiting my job *increase* Fear??

It also seems that you are doing what you want. There is no way that I could sit on a job with this in front of me. But you stated that the job is comfort. Comfort must be what you want. So..... you are doing what you want. You don't want the business to collapse yet you are not stepping up.

The comfort of the job and fear. Decisions you need to make.

Comfort for my wife/kids, yes...