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c3a

New Contributor
Nov 23, 2019
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Hello everyone!
I would like some advice of those that haves experience with business and family.
I am dad of a 5yo boy and have a wife. But both haves personality of being with people and calling for attention(mostly includes being with me). But I am more the cave guy, can sit in front of computer or in workshop, and I am fine with that for a long time.

The thing what happens since we met is that my wife calls for my attention so much, and sometimes we get to big fights. It doesn't happens so explicitly as I say, because this fights hides bellow other random topics. But the root from it, is from me spending "too much" time on my own. The fact is that I do spend a lot of time, working, improving stuff, studying, as I wanna get freaking much to fastlane. But all the time I spend time working in my "free time" my wife just gets mad, and doesn't even talks to me, although there is no other problem besides that I didn't spend the day with her. It can even be scheduled in advance, when I say I will need a day to do something, problems starts to arise from the air.

She is very lonely because she doesn't have any friends around town, so she is very socially anxious.

I don't know what to do because I feel guilty of being working, and I am loosing hope. When we talk about this topic, things go bad and she can swear that she has no problem with me working overtime.

She wants us to go fastlane, but I guess some inner fear of being alone calls out louder somehow.

Do some of you guys experienced this? I wanna work so hard, and I am struggling with myself being guilty about it. How to cope hardworking with family?

And those that haves wife, with this problem or not, do you feel supported? Cause I am starting to believe it isn't possible to be supported in this road.

Looking forward for answers!
 

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Vigilante

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Expand the clock. After work hours (around dinner time) she may need help with your son. And, your son will only be this little for a short time. So here's what I would do :

1. reserve your studying for after he is in bed
2. get up at 5AM instead of 7AM, and spend those two hours on your business and studies

You need to be able to successfully manage BOTH. Down the road, when your business is successful you can reschedule again. But for today, you have to fit your studies (which are important) around your family (which is MORE important).

Your wife will support you as the business takes shape later, Today, she probably feels the same... like she is not supported by you. You can change that. You can do it all. You just have to structure your schedule differently.
 
OP
OP
C

c3a

New Contributor
Nov 23, 2019
2
1
11
Expand the clock. After work hours (around dinner time) she may need help with your son. And, your son will only be this little for a short time. So here's what I would do :

1. reserve your studying for after he is in bed
2. get up at 5AM instead of 7AM, and spend those two hours on your business and studies

You need to be able to successfully manage BOTH. Down the road, when your business is successful you can reschedule again. But for today, you have to fit your studies (which are important) around your family (which is MORE important).

Your wife will support you as the business takes shape later, Today, she probably feels the same... like she is not supported by you. You can change that. You can do it all. You just have to structure your schedule differently.
Thank you very much for your reply. I guess you are right. I have been waking up earlier whenever I can, but what may lacks is an agreed schedule, so there is clearly the time I support her, and clearly the time she supports me. I might try that!
 

Vigilante

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Thank you very much for your reply. I guess you are right. I have been waking up earlier whenever I can, but what may lacks is an agreed schedule, so there is clearly the time I support her, and clearly the time she supports me. I might try that!
Try it a few weeks with perfect consistency and let us know.
 

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